[Assail]

Bent, on Mar 30 2009, 12:40 PM, said:

I do...but his name was Bender so he put me back together and we became friends and he destroyed you with his head thing...not that head.

I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was a baller, I wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her
I wish I had a rabbit in a hat, with a bat and a six four impala....

You got taller, which subsequently helped you to become an NBA star, you got rich, and found a hella good looking girl but had herpes, which you got, you bought a rabbit, ended up going crazy as fuck from the Herpes, nailed the rabbit and gave it Herpes out of your craziness and then you trashed your six four impala with a bat in your death throes from Herpes from your good looking girl.

GO HERPES!

I wish I was a straight O.G.

[Bent]

Assail, on Mar 30 2009, 03:42 PM, said:

Bent, on Mar 30 2009, 12:40 PM, said:

I do...but his name was Bender so he put me back together and we became friends and he destroyed you with his head thing...not that head.


I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was a baller, I wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her
I wish I had a rabbit in a hat, with a bat and a six four impala....

You got taller, which subsequently helped you to become an NBA star, you got rich, and found a hella good looking girl but had herpes, which you got, you bought a rabbit, ended up going crazy as fuck from the Herpes, nailed the rabbit and gave it Herpes out of your craziness and then you trashed your six four impala with a bat in your death throes from Herpes from your good looking girl.

GO HERPES!

I wish I was straight

Me too...

Assail, on Mar 30 2009, 03:42 PM, said:

I wish I was a straight O.G.

But your not, you instead become a straight O.D

After overdosing on heroin, you are now in a vegative state for the next 40 years

[Assail]

Bent, on Mar 30 2009, 12:45 PM, said:

Assail, on Mar 30 2009, 03:42 PM, said:

Bent, on Mar 30 2009, 12:40 PM, said:

I do...but his name was Bender so he put me back together and we became friends and he destroyed you with his head thing...not that head.


I wish I was a little bit taller, I wish I was a baller, I wish I had a girl who looked good, I would call her
I wish I had a rabbit in a hat, with a bat and a six four impala....

You got taller, which subsequently helped you to become an NBA star, you got rich, and found a hella good looking girl but had herpes, which you got, you bought a rabbit, ended up going crazy as fuck from the Herpes, nailed the rabbit and gave it Herpes out of your craziness and then you trashed your six four impala with a bat in your death throes from Herpes from your good looking girl.

GO HERPES!

I wish I was straight

Me too...

Assail, on Mar 30 2009, 03:42 PM, said:

I wish I was a straight O.G.

But your not, you instead become a straight O.D

After overdosing on heroin, you are now in a vegative state for the next 40 years

Wtf, you didn't wish!

[Abyss]

- Abyss, wishes he understood the thread x-post mess that followed his last post.

[Assail]

Abyss, on Mar 30 2009, 12:48 PM, said:

- Abyss, wishes he understood the thread x-post mess that followed his last post.

Lmao, mine is better! Yet no one replied to it

[Abyss]

Someone replies to it. And then becomes enamoured of you, stalks you, hunts you down, pulls a 'children of the dead seed' thing and your illicit murder spawned progeny CONQUER THE WORLD.

- Abyss, wishes he hadn't thought of that.

This post has been edited by Abyss: 30 March 2009 - 07:52 PM

[Assail]

Bent, on Mar 30 2009, 12:51 PM, said:

And then you spolded from all the awesomeness that was the x-post.

I wish Assail had caught on that I wished in the first part of my post, instead of the last...

Oh he caught on, after he read the post again LOL.

Bent also becomes straight, but after being gay and turning straight was hated by all the gay community. So they beat him to death with big black dildos.

I wish I was a super hero!

[Abyss]

Assail, on Mar 30 2009, 03:53 PM, said:

I wish I was a super hero!

You are Captain America. Unfortunately you are dead and buried.

- Abyss, wishes he was in Dixie, down south, down south...

This post has been edited by Abyss: 30 March 2009 - 08:02 PM

[Assail]

Abyss, on Mar 30 2009, 01:01 PM, said:

Assail, on Mar 30 2009, 03:53 PM, said:

I wish I was a super hero!

You are Captain America. Unfortunately you are dead and buried.

- Abyss, wishes he was in Dixie, down south, down south...

Abyss is in Dixie, but he's lynched for being Canadian, because that's what they do down south.

I wish life was easy.

[Abyss]

Assail, on Mar 30 2009, 04:03 PM, said:

I wish life was easy.

Life's not easy but you are. And then come the venereal diseases.

- Abyss, wishes his recent posts in this thread didn't have an icky theme...

[Bent]

Abyss, on Mar 30 2009, 04:15 PM, said:

Assail, on Mar 30 2009, 04:03 PM, said:

I wish life was easy.

Life's not easy but you are. And then come the venereal diseases.

- Abyss, wishes his recent posts in this thread didn't have an icky theme...

They don't and people see you for who you truly are..an internet predator, looking for fresh brainz...they arrest you and sentence you to life without parole in the same cell as your nemisis...that guy from the SHAM-WOW! commercials

I wish I had my own abysmal series theme...

[Assail]

Bent, on Mar 30 2009, 01:20 PM, said:

Abyss, on Mar 30 2009, 04:15 PM, said:

Assail, on Mar 30 2009, 04:03 PM, said:

I wish life was easy.

Life's not easy but you are. And then come the venereal diseases.

- Abyss, wishes his recent posts in this thread didn't have an icky theme...

They don't and people see you for who you truly are..an internet predator, looking for fresh brainz...they arrest you and sentence you to life without parole in the same cell as your nemisis...that guy from the SHAM-WOW! commercials

I wish I had my own abysmal series theme...

You did, but it turns out it entails you spending time in the same cell with Vince from Sham-Wow and Abyss.

I wish I was Billy Mays

[Slow Ben]

You are Billy Mays, then you find out his voice box is impaired and you actually talk that loud all the time and people cant stand to be around.

I wish i had a cheeseburger.

[Abyss]

You have a cheeseburger. Unfortunately cheeseburgers are bad for you. The beef and cheese and bun and toppings boost your cholesterol to near olympian levels, clog your arteries, cause your heart to beat irregularly, rot your teeth, give you severe acne and cause your penis to shirvel to something resembling a piece of bavarian licorice. Now don't you wish that you wished for a salad?

- Abyss, wishes cheeseburgers were good for you...

[Thelomen Toblerone]

Much like with eggs, nutrotionists turn out to have been wrong AGAIN, and it turns out cheezburgers ARE in fact good for you.

The only problem is, they turn out to be SO good for people, that every cow in the world in slaughtered to try and meet demand, and prices skyrocket before THERE ARE NO MORE CHEESEBURGERS. EVAR.

I wish the food I just spent ages making didnt taste like dirty cheesy feet.

[Abyss]

Your food now tastes like CLEAN cheesy feet. isn't that better?

- Abyss, wishes that when you wish upon a star, it makes no difference who you are...

[Cause]

Someones whose wish would have previously gone ignored wished you dead.

I wish the forum was more active now so when I take breaks from writing 20+ pages of boring experimental methods there is something exciting to read

[Assail]

Cause, on Apr 1 2009, 12:06 PM, said:

Someones whose wish would have previously gone ignored wished you dead.

I wish the forum was more active now so when I take breaks from writing 20+ pages of boring experimental methods there is something exciting to read

Your wish is granted but you get so caught up in these forums that you fail your classes, lose your job, lose everything precious to you and eventually die a lonely, unaccomplished man because you didn't want to right 20+ pages of boring experimental methods.

I wish for more codine!

[Slow Ben]

You get some. You become hopelessly addicted to codine and end up in Mexico trying to make a deal for a lifetime supply and are busted by the authorities and sent to jail to be the new playmate of Bubba, the 400 pound love machine.

I wish i had some deer sausage.

[Sixty]

You have some deer sausage. A deer's sausage. In your mouth.

I wish I could just teleport. That would make life so much more convenient.