[Abyss]

Might be more accurate to say money can buy style but it can't buy class.

[Mrs Savagely Wishy Washy]

I had a friend who used to say that in life you can become rich, but your are born with style/classy/elegant..... Doesn't translate well but I'm sure you get the gist.

[Spoilsport Stonny]

Abyss, on 05 July 2013 - 01:26 PM, said:

Might be more accurate to say money can buy style but it can't buy class.

Now that I agree with.

[amphibian]

I don't understand the hate for using gift cards to Olive Garden or Chili's for a date. Someone had a friend or relative who gave them that gift card. There was probably no choosing of the venue and it's better to use it for an average (and hugely portioned) meal and a few drinks.

Fun can be had at mediocre chain restaurants. It's not going to be because of the food or drink though - which is perfectly okay.

[Macros]

You have a gift card fucking use it.
if she doesn't like, she's not a keeper.
/thread

[Abyss]

Macros, on 06 July 2013 - 02:27 PM, said:

You have a gift card fucking use it.
but not on a first date. if you do, you're not a keeper.
/thread

Fixed.
/>

[Garak]

So an update from that post I made a while back. In the end I didn't talk to her about it. She once said that I'm good at picking up on other people's emotions and general state of being and apparently she was right. I suspected there was a guy she had an interest in (small clues that I only noticed due to paying attention) and in the end she did mention it. Apparently she thought the guy was totally worth her time but she didn't know if she should or not (guy lives in another city, she's going to Denmark to study etc.) ... of course she could also have been testing the water as it was, seeing how I'd react. I admit I surprised myself in that I didn't feel hurt or anything (first time for everything I guess), so I told her that if she has a shot at happiness, go for it.

Yesterday she confirmed they are together (again I had a feeling way before she said anything) and I'm fine with it. She's still dear to me and our friendship is the same as always, we still know we can count on each other for support, our humor is still overflowing with sexual innuendo (because our humor is just that weird and we've been at it since we've known each other ..... and that campaign were we both played as Drow really gave ammo for our jokes). Maybe I'm ok with it since I never got my hopes up or anything, I don't know.

She did promise to keep an eye for any hot Danish girls and send them over, so there's that.

[Tapper]

Miss Savagely Wishy Washy, on 04 July 2013 - 03:24 PM, said:

I am not easily impressed but I'm immediately immensely impressed if someone I'm interested in takes me to a place that is anything else than a chain - cos I think chains are so boring and have never understood the fascination of a large part of anglo-world with chain restaurants, cafes and whatever else chain - plus if the guy makes an effort to scout a nice place where the food is nice, that says something about how much time he spent thinking about the place to go to, that he appreciates food and from there you can start extrapolating about all sorts of other things.


Of course the idea of the date is to get to know the person, but if I find the person already boring because he chose to go to the most boring place for food the whole point about where to go becomes suddenly important.

And needless to say, gift cards on the first date is cheap and I'd rather pay for my meal myself.

If I want to impress someone, I take them to a good place, and I don't mean good in terms of expensive and a bottle of wine no less than 50 quid, but a place I have been to, where food is great, service is good and I don't really care so much about the price as long as it is within my financial means. You know, if I don't get laid, at least I enjoyed the food.


I concur with Abyss and Morgoth but just wanted to corroborate their points from a female pov.

This I fully agree with.

Not only does choosing a nice little place show that you took the effort to pick a non-standard place (and if it doesn't hit off, hey, you can go there again and maybe impress another date with your restaurant knowledge), it also shows you know your way around town and probably go out for dinner regularly - not a bad prospect for a first date and something that may give you a second shot if she's not yet completely convinced after the first date ("conversation didn't go so fluidly but everything else was nice, he choose that beautifully" is a lot more positive than "conversation didn't go so fluidly and the food sucked").

The price tag is not important, so much. In a way, taking someone to a cheap restaurant that has a small menu which is of marvellous quality can be better than taking her to an overpriced restaurant at a top location where you pay for the linen napkins with embroidered restaurant logo: the food shows you care about quality even if the price tag doesn't, and the meal is quicker, allowing you the option of going for a drink afterwards if things go well and a quick escape if she's not as interesting as she seemed (and the same goes for her regarding you).

Posh dining has a place (@ Kanubis, Michelin goes up to 3 stars ) but the two times I tried the real fine dining with 'new' dates (first and third date), I found that aside from excited at the prospect and the food, they were also mortified as it was an entirely new experience - and that probably started at home in front of the clothing cabinet.
It can end with feeding each other little morsels of food and wild, wild sex afterwards, but if she's not an adventurous diner a place which serves black truffle risotto with very lightly seared scallops followed by an amuse of olive oil ice cream may not be a treat for her but something to struggle through. Plus, all the wine that comes with it. Don't be surprised if, even if you make it home together, you'll just fall asleep on top of each other. Finally, even if it all goes awesomely, how are you going to top it on the next date?

To recap: I like the tasting menu experience, but much more as something to do when in a relationship rather than on a date. For a date, pick a nice place that scores above average on atmosphere, service + clientèle scales with a good price/quality standard than going all out or horribly cheap.

[Morgoth]

Tapper knows of what she speak. One should listen to her to find the secret paths of the female heart.

[amphibian]

Dudes and dudettes, I got a $25 gift card to Applebee's. I generally loathe the place, but hey, I'll use it and have a blast with my date.

Quit overthinking this. No, it's not ideal to go to either extreme, but the company matters far more than venue.

[Vengeance]

amphibian, on 05 August 2013 - 02:12 PM, said:

Dudes and dudettes, I got a $25 gift card to Applebee's. I generally loathe the place, but hey, I'll use it and have a blast with my date.

Quit overthinking this. No, it's not ideal to go to either extreme, but the company matters far more than venue.

Amp you would not use that on a first date though would you. You would save that GC for the second date when you where definitely going to get laid.

[amphibian]

You know me so dang well. It's always been the second date is the lucky one for me.

[Kanubis]

I sometimes wonder if I was lucky or not to avoid all this dating stuff. Relationships always just formed from drunken encounters at house parties and things like that for me.

Dating sounds like a bit of a thrill but also a shit load of hassle.

On balance I reckon I was lucky.

[Kanubis]

Briar King, on 06 August 2013 - 02:24 AM, said:

Kanubis, on 05 August 2013 - 09:52 PM, said:

I sometimes wonder if I was lucky or not to avoid all this dating stuff. Relationships always just formed from drunken encounters at house parties and things like that for me.

Dating sounds like a bit of a thrill but also a shit load of hassle.

On balance I reckon I was lucky.

That was me. Got with my ex wife when I was 20 and she was a mth away from 18. We were together 10 yrs after that so I had to hit the dating scene finally at 30.

Oh yeah, I did that silly young relationship marriage thing too. Luckily (in hindsight) it fell apart before my mid twenties. The next long term one (who I'm still with at 34) lived 1000km away so we had to skip the dating bit.

[amphibian]

Had a date take me back home to watch a movie - wink wink - and her puppy was walking around throwing up or making gagging noises.

Three hours she and I spent with this dog, trying to encourage it to up chuck whatever it was, before I gave up and went home.

Walnut shell poisoning killed any future prospects of a date too.

This post has been edited by amphibian: 11 April 2014 - 03:42 AM

[Vengeance]

amphibian, on 11 April 2014 - 03:41 AM, said:

Had a date take me back home to watch a movie - wink wink - and her puppy was walking around throwing up or making gagging noises.

Three hours she and I spent with this dog, trying to encourage it to up chuck whatever it was, before I gave up and went home.

Walnut shell poisoning killed any future prospects of a date too.

I would have thought that you would have been a lock for sure after spending 3 hour with her dog trying to get him to up chuck. Look at how thoughtful you are.

[Tattersail_]

I was about to go to bed when I get a call. It was from this girl that I liked. She asked me to come over. I thought about it for a whole 0 seconds and said yes. I ring her door bell and she lets me in.We get cozy and she starts telling me about her day. I pretended to listen, as you do, she mentioned something about her sick puppy or whatever and how she had finally got it to sleep. She asked me about my day and then after a brief discussion we went upstairs. I have been here since then, the sex is just awesome!

[Tattersail_]

Here's a picture of me and the puppy (it's well again)

 puppy.jpg (64.68K)
Number of downloads: 16

[Tiste Simeon]

Reading through this thread is somewhat confusing to me as I never dated girls with the idea that I would have sex with her afterwards. Sure there was a thought that it would no doubt be nice to but I only really dated Christian girls so I knew that we would be thinking of where this would go long term rather than just if I could me get sex (and if I wanted sex it would be a long time in the future after the correct words had been said and correct rings adorned!)
I find it fascinating reading about these experiences that are in some ways alien to me!

[Tattersail_]

Tiste Brent Not Abyss Weeks Simeon, on 11 April 2014 - 02:57 PM, said:

Reading through this thread is somewhat confusing to me as I never dated girls with the idea that I would have sex with her afterwards. Sure there was a thought that it would no doubt be nice to but I only really dated Christian girls so I knew that we would be thinking of where this would go long term rather than just if I could me get sex (and if I wanted sex it would be a long time in the future after the correct words had been said and correct rings adorned!)
I find it fascinating reading about these experiences that are in some ways alien to me!

The above scenario for me was a joke in a reply to amp's problem. I am happily married and would never stray