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The "Post what ever the hell" you want thread (Within the limits of the Code of Conduct, you perverts)

#1401 User is online   Tsundoku 

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Posted 23 December 2019 - 05:07 PM

Double post

Cool ultra short story. Fairly famous apparently, though I've never heard of it before.

Fredric Brown "Answer"

Dwan Ev ceremoniously soldered the final connection with gold. The eyes of a dozen television cameras watched him and the subether bore throughout the universe a dozen pictures of what he was doing.
He straightened and nodded to Dwar Reyn, then moved to a position beside the switch that would complete the contact when he threw it. The switch that would connect, all at once, all of the monster computing machines of all the populated planets in the universe -- ninety-six billion planets -- into the supercircuit that would connect them all into one supercalculator, one cybernetics machine that would combine all the knowledge of all the galaxies.
Dwar Reyn spoke briefly to the watching and listening trillions. Then after a moment's silence he said, "Now, Dwar Ev."
Dwar Ev threw the switch. There was a mighty hum, the surge of power from ninety-six billion planets. Lights flashed and quieted along the miles-long panel.
Dwar Ev stepped back and drew a deep breath. "The honor of asking the first question is yours, Dwar Reyn."
"Thank you," said Dwar Reyn. "It shall be a question which no single cybernetics machine has been able to answer."
He turned to face the machine. "Is there a God?"
The mighty voice answered without hesitation, without the clicking of a single relay.
"Yes, now there is a God."
Sudden fear flashed on the face of Dwar Ev. He leaped to grab the switch.
A bolt of lightning from the cloudless sky struck him down and fused the switch shut.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Reminds me a bit of the Asimov short story "The Last Question", which is one of my favourites of all time.

https://www.multivax...t_question.html
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#1402 User is online   Tsundoku 

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Posted 23 December 2019 - 05:16 PM

Triple Post!

The "Light Triad" of being a good person (as opposed to the Dark Triad of naughtiness)

"The first trait, humanism, is defined as believing in the inherent dignity and worth of other humans. The second, Kantianism, gets its name from philosopher Immanuel Kant, and means treating people as ends unto themselves, not just as unwitting pawns in your personal game of chess. Finally, “faith in humanity” is about believing that other humans are fundamentally good, and not out to get you."

"Two decades ago psychologists came up with the now infamous “dark triad” of personality traits to understand why some people don’t think twice before cheating on a test or picking on someone weaker than them. Since then researchers have seized upon this trio – namely narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy – investigating how they relate to a variety of things including workplace success, relationship troubles, and even the seven deadly sins."

https://www.bbc.com/...u-a-good-person

The Light Triad Scale Test

https://scottbarryka...ighttriadscale/

(Yeah ... I can't sleep)

This post has been edited by Tsundoku: 23 December 2019 - 05:17 PM

"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#1403 User is online   Tsundoku 

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Posted 30 December 2019 - 05:09 AM

Doesn't count :p

Who knew modern dating was so complicated?

https://metro.co.uk/...aying-11206511/
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#1404 User is online   Tsundoku 

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Posted 31 December 2019 - 12:03 PM

Nothing quite like your own echo chamber.

This is very interesting. The resettlement program for non-viable Canadian communities. Never knew it was a thing but it makes sense, if a bit ruthless.

https://www.news.com...b804b455b4a600a
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#1405 User is online   Tsundoku 

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Posted 01 January 2020 - 09:19 AM

How to become a tech billionaire. Ethics be damned.

https://www.news.com...7f020cd3774d665
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#1406 User is online   Tsundoku 

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Posted 04 January 2020 - 12:43 PM

Firefighter from Nelligan NSW has a few choice words for the PM:



And of course the Govt had to release an ad patting themselves on the back for ... what, exactly? Dipshits. Too little, too late.

https://www.news.com...1a74c11201d2633
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#1407 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 07 January 2020 - 01:43 AM

Sacha Baron Cohen's roast of Zuckerberg at the Golden Globe Awards is worth quoting.

Quote

"The hero of this next movie is a naive, misguided child who spreads Nazi propaganda and only has imaginary friends. His name is Mark Zuckerberg. Sorry, sorry. This is an old intro for The Social Network. I'm actually talking about Jojo Rabbit. It's nominated for two Golden Globes and it's directed by its star, the brilliant and groundbreaking Taika Waititi."

It's funny because it's true. Posted ImagePosted Image
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#1408 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 23 January 2020 - 08:59 PM

The lyrics to 'Toss A Coin To Your Witcher' are absurd.



Quote

When a humble bard
Graced a ride along
With Geralt of Rivia
Along came this song

From when the White Wolf fought
A silver-tongued devil
His army of elves
At his hooves did they revel

They came after me
With masterful deceit
Broke down my lute
And they kicked in my teeth

While the devil's horns
Minced our tender meat
And so cried the Witcher
He can't be bleat

Toss a coin to your Witcher
O' Valley of Plenty
O' Valley of Plenty
O'

Toss a coin to Your Witcher
O' Valley of Plenty

At the edge of the world
Fight the mighty horde
That bashes and breaks you
And brings you to mourn

He thrust every elf
Far back on the shelf
High up on the mountain
From whence it came

He wiped out your pest
Got kicked in his chest
He's a friend of humanity
So give him the rest

That's my epic tale
Our champion prevailed
Defeated the villain
Now pour him some ale

Toss a coin to your Witcher
O' Valley of Plenty
O' Valley of Plenty
O'

Toss a coin to your Witcher
And friend of humanity

Toss a coin to your Witcher
O' Valley of Plenty
O' Valley of Plenty
O'

And friend of humanity

Toss a coin to your Witcher
O' Valley of Plenty
O' Valley of Plenty
O'

Toss a coin to your Witcher

A friend of humanity

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#1409 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 03 February 2020 - 08:22 PM

Skinny Jason Momoa was the best SB commercial, with Baby Mr. Peanut a close second.

Opening was really cool, though not a commercial, I think. It was the one with the kid delivering the football for the kick off - "take it to the house kid". Joe Montana totally roasted Jimmy G. - "I'll give him a tip alright" Posted Image
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#1410 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 05 February 2020 - 06:26 PM

More on Kansas . . .

If you ever meet "Steve from Kansas", be sure to cherish that moment, because you have quite possibly met the most milquetoast, mundane, average, unassuming human being ever to live. He can be found exactly in the middle of the state.
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#1411 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 10 February 2020 - 11:29 PM

You know, they say every thing is bigger in Texas. Poppycock I say! Here in Colorado we pat little fake cowboy Texans on the head and show them what "big" really means.

World's largest firework launched in Colorado Saturday night





Posted Image
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#1412 User is offline   Maark Abbott 

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Posted 11 February 2020 - 08:38 AM

Someone on Malazcord attempted to persuade me to go back to reading Badwrite Anchovy.

Engumblement of them



Facebook - www.facebook[dotcom]/MaarkAbbottWriting / Twitter - @MAbbottWriting / I'm on Goodreads somewhere as well

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Debut novel 'Incarnate' now available on Kindle
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#1413 User is online   Tsundoku 

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Posted 19 February 2020 - 09:06 AM

View PostMaark Abbott, on 11 February 2020 - 08:38 AM, said:

Someone on Malazcord attempted to persuade me to go back to reading Badwrite Anchovy.

Engumblement of them


Is that Ye Olde English? :ermm:

In other news, hey BK - isn't Alabama the next state over? :lol:

https://www.news.com...305f705a037213a

This post has been edited by Tsundoku: 19 February 2020 - 09:07 AM

"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
0

#1414 User is online   Tsundoku 

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Posted 26 February 2020 - 09:30 AM

Inspired by my recently being assumed to be a reader of The Sun.

One of my favourite quotes from one of the best TV comedies of all time - and maybe the best political comedy:

James Hacker:
I know exactly who reads the papers. The Daily Mirror is read by people who think they run the country. The Guardian is read by people who think they ought to run the country. The Times is read by people who actually do run the country. The Daily Mail is read by the wives of the people who run the country. The Financial Times is read by people who own the country. The Morning Star is read by the people who think the country should be run by another country. And the Daily Telegraph is read by people who think it is.

Sir Humphrey Appleby:
Prime Minister, what about the people who read the Sun?

Bernard Woolley:
The Sun readers don't care who runs the country, as long as she's got big tits.

This post has been edited by Tsundoku: 26 February 2020 - 09:31 AM

"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#1415 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 28 February 2020 - 04:42 PM

So, we need to talk Leap Day. Any you guys have any traditions? Is it yet another excuse to have a night out with the lads, tying one on, only to end the evening stumbling home staring at your nose? Or do you guys do anything more profound and meaningful to celebrate Leap Day?
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#1416 User is online   Tsundoku 

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Posted 28 February 2020 - 10:33 PM

AFAIK there's nothing special about it over here, just that it occurs.
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
0

#1417 User is online   Mentalist 

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Posted 06 March 2020 - 08:13 PM

My manager is freaking out about Covid.

I'm being sentenced to work from home for the next week.

Not sure how to feel about this.
The problem with the gene pool is that there's no lifeguard
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View PostJump Around, on 23 October 2011 - 11:04 AM, said:

And I want to state that Ment has out-weaseled me by far in this game.
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#1418 User is online   Tsundoku 

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Posted 07 March 2020 - 12:04 AM

... yay ...?

:unsure:

Working in your undies and without your coworkers has to be a positive. Especially without your coworkers in their undies.

This post has been edited by Tsundoku: 07 March 2020 - 12:06 AM

"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#1419 User is offline   Messremb 

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Posted 10 March 2020 - 08:03 AM

View PostTsundoku, on 07 March 2020 - 12:04 AM, said:

... yay ...?

:unsure:

Working in your undies and without your coworkers has to be a positive. Especially without your coworkers in their undies.


That rather depends on your coworkers

(quick glance around, maybe you have a point)
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#1420 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 10 March 2020 - 08:12 AM

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