Malazan Empire: Weird News Story Du Jour - Malazan Empire

Jump to content

  • 38 Pages +
  • « First
  • 8
  • 9
  • 10
  • 11
  • 12
  • Last »
  • You cannot start a new topic
  • You cannot reply to this topic

Weird News Story Du Jour One thread to bring them all and in the darkness ... wtf?

#181 User is offline   worry 

  • Master of the Deck
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 14,708
  • Joined: 24-February 10
  • Location:the buried west

Posted 21 July 2010 - 05:51 PM

Man, he didn't even get to know it first.
They came with white hands and left with red hands.
0

#182 User is online   Tsundoku 

  • A what?
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 4,840
  • Joined: 06-January 03
  • Location:Maison de merde

Posted 23 July 2010 - 02:00 PM

I find your lack of cash ... disturbing.

-------------------------------

http://www.news.com....i-1225896148785

'Darth Vader' robs Long Island bank ... by force

* By Arun Kristian Das of myFOXny.com
* From: NewsCore
* July 23, 2010 2:45PM

A MAN wearing a Darth Vader mask and cape robbed a Chase bank branch in Long Island, New York, today.

The thief - who was also clad in camouflage pants - entered a branch in Setauket at 11.30am local time and demanded money from a teller, myFOXny.com said.

But instead of wielding a light saber like the Star Wars villain, renowned for using the Force to get his way in the sci-fi blockbusters, Long Island's dark lord threatened the teller with a semiautomatic gun.

The teller gave the robber some cash from the drawer before he fled through the bank's parking lot.

--------------------------------------

Conquer the galaxy, wipe out the Jedi and you're a legend for a day. Lose a couple of lousy Death Stars, overthrow the boss and it's all downhill from there ... :)

This post has been edited by Sombra: 23 July 2010 - 02:01 PM

"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
1

#183 User is offline   Dag 

  • Burninating poodles since 1996
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 437
  • Joined: 12-March 07
  • Location:Vienna, Austria

Posted 28 July 2010 - 06:54 AM

Bear crashes in runaway car

Run for your life, Rodeo!!! Soon they'll be coming after you... in their Lamborghinis and Mustangs... :p
The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues.
0

#184 User is offline   Darkwatch 

  • A Strange Human
  • Group: The Most Holy and Exalted Inquis
  • Posts: 2,190
  • Joined: 21-February 03
  • Location:MACS0647-JD
  • 1.6180339887

Posted 29 July 2010 - 05:17 PM

Man eaten by maggots Link

Quote

Disabled Austrian eaten to death by maggots: police
July 28, 2010
A paralysed Austrian man was eaten to death by maggots in his bed while his partner slept beside him, police said Wednesday.


The 61-year-old retiree died in an ambulance on his way to hospital in Vienna on Tuesday with the maggots having partly devoured his back.
Paramedics notified police after discovering the shocking state of hygiene in the man's home, and his 34-year-old partner was questioned over his condition.
"The man had not wanted to be washed for a long time," a police spokesman said.
According to police, the couple had been together for around a decade, and the victim's partner had slept in the same bed right up until his death.
The dead man had been paralysed for several years following a stroke.
© 2010 AFP

The Pub is Always Open

Proud supporter of the Wolves of Winter. Glory be to her Majesty, The Lady Snow.
Cursed Summer returns. The Lady Now Sleeps.

The Sexy Thatch Burning Physicist

Τον Πρωτος Αληθη Δεσποτην της Οικιας Αυτος

RodeoRanch said:

You're a rock.
A non-touching itself rock.
0

#185 User is online   Tsundoku 

  • A what?
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 4,840
  • Joined: 06-January 03
  • Location:Maison de merde

Posted 01 August 2010 - 06:54 AM

This one has been done to death in the DB, but it's still kinda funny ... if a tad disturbing:

------------------------------------------

http://www.news.com....r-1225899497234

Creationists hijack lessons and teach schoolkids man and dinosaurs walked together By Carly Hennessy and Kathleen Donaghey From: The Courier-Mail August 01, 2010 12:00AM

PRIMARY school students are being taught that man and dinosaurs walked the Earth together and that there is fossil evidence to prove it.
Fundamentalist Christians are hijacking Religious Instruction (RI) classes in Queensland despite education experts saying Creationism and attempts to convert children to Christianity have no place in state schools.

Students have been told Noah collected dinosaur eggs to bring on the Ark, and Adam and Eve were not eaten by dinosaurs because they were under a protective spell.

Critics are calling for the RI program to be scrapped after claims emerged Christian lay people are feeding children misinformation.

About 80 per cent of children at state primary schools attend one half-hour instruction a week, open to any interested lay person to conduct.

Many of the instructors are from Pentecostal churches.

Australian Secular Lobby president Hugh Wilson said children were ostracised and discriminated against if they were pulled out of the class.

In many cases, the RI lay people were not supervised by teachers.

Kings Christian Church youth worker Dustin Bell said he taught "about creation" in Sunshine Coast schools.

Set Free Christian Church's Tim McKenzie said when students questioned him why dinosaur fossils carbon dated as earlier than man, he replied that the great flood must have skewed the data.

Queensland Teachers Union president Steve Ryan said teachers were sometimes compelled to supervise the instructors "because of all the fire and brimstone stuff".

Mr Ryan said Education Queensland had deemed RI a must-have, though teachers would prefer to spend the time on curriculum.

Buddhist Council of Queensland president Jim Ferguson said he was so disturbed that Creationism was being aired in state school classrooms that he would bring it up at the next meeting of the Religious Education Advisory Committee, part of Education Queensland.

He said RI was supposed to be a forum for multi-faith discussion.

Education Queensland assistant director-general Patrea Walton said Creationism was part of some faiths, and therefore was part of some teaching.

New research shows three in 10 Australians believe dinosaurs and man did exist at the same time. The survey, by the Federation of Australian Scientific and Technological Societies, shows a "worrying" lack of basic scientific principles.

"The results underscore the need for students to be exposed to science and mathematics through a well resourced education system, rather than learning about science through Jurassic Park," FASTS president Dr Cathy Foley said.

PhD researcher Cathy Byrne found in a NSW-based survey that scripture teachers tended to discourage questioning, emphasised submission to authority and excluded different beliefs. She said 70 per cent of scripture teachers thought children should be taught the Bible as historical fact.

A parent of a Year 5 student on the Sunshine Coast said his daughter was ostracised to the library after arguing with her scripture teacher about DNA.

"The scripture teacher told the class that all people were descended from Adam and Eve," he said.

"My daughter rightly pointed out, as I had been teaching her about DNA and science, that 'wouldn't they all be inbred'?

"But the teacher replied that DNA wasn't invented then."

After the parent complained, the girl spent the rest of the year's classes in the library.

-----------------------------------------------------------

Adam and Eve vs T-Rex and Velociraptors - how cool would that movie be? :)

This post has been edited by Sombra: 01 August 2010 - 06:55 AM

"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
0

#186 User is offline   MTS 

  • Fourth Investiture
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 4,334
  • Joined: 02-April 07
  • Location:Terra Australis

Posted 01 August 2010 - 07:53 AM

God casts Aura of Protection on Adam and Eve. +infinity defence!

T-Rex rolls a zero.

God casts Meteor!

T-Rex is dead.

This post has been edited by MTS: 01 August 2010 - 07:54 AM

Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem.

Si hoc adfixum in obice legere potes, et liberaliter educatus et nimis propinquus ades.
0

#187 User is offline   Use Of Weapons 

  • Soletaken
  • View gallery
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 2,237
  • Joined: 06-May 03
  • Location:Manchester, UK
  • Interests:Writing. Martial arts. Sport. Music, playing and singing, composition.

Posted 02 August 2010 - 10:50 AM

View PostMTS, on 01 August 2010 - 07:53 AM, said:

God casts Aura of Protection on Adam and Eve. +infinity defence!

T-Rex rolls a zero.

God casts Meteor!

T-Rex is dead.


I think this comic is appropriate here:

Posted Image
It is perfectly monstrous the way people go about nowadays saying things against one, behind one's back, that are absolutely and entirely true.
-- Oscar Wilde
0

#188 User is offline   Dag 

  • Burninating poodles since 1996
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 437
  • Joined: 12-March 07
  • Location:Vienna, Austria

Posted 17 August 2010 - 06:18 AM

Scotland has whisky, Switzerland has chocolate and cheese, and Serbia has... testicles. :(

The Testicle Cooking World Championship

This post has been edited by Dag: 17 August 2010 - 06:20 AM

The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues.
0

#189 User is offline   worry 

  • Master of the Deck
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 14,708
  • Joined: 24-February 10
  • Location:the buried west

Posted 17 August 2010 - 07:02 AM

Ray Bradbury has joined the Tea Party

http://latimesblogs....evolution-.html

I don't mention this to mock the Tea Party, but because Ray Bradbury is a total wiener these days.

“We have too many cellphones. We've got too many Internets. We have got to get rid of those machines. We have too many machines now.”
They came with white hands and left with red hands.
0

#190 User is online   Tsundoku 

  • A what?
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 4,840
  • Joined: 06-January 03
  • Location:Maison de merde

Posted 01 September 2010 - 10:35 AM

I am picturing this spider with a scarred face, metal endoskeleton exposed and single glowing red eye ...

EDIT: also carefully note the text I have put in bold in the article title. :)

----------------------------------------

http://www.news.com....i-1225912965493

Chris Welding blows himself trying to kill spider that frightened wife Janine

* From: The Daily Telegraph
* September 01, 2010 5:54PM

WHEN his wife screamed there was a spider in the house, Chris Welding sprang to her defence, nearly killing himself in the process.

The IT engineer chased the spider into their bathroom in Clacton, Essex, England.

Wielding a flammable aerosol can, he sprayed the spider as it cowered behind the toilet pan and then lit a cigarette lighter to see if he had killed it.

However, the flame ignited the gas and caused a massive explosion blow Mr Welding off his feet and into the hall, causing severe burns, and lifting the loft door off its hinges.

He suffered flash burns to his head, legs and torso and was rushed by ambulance to hospital after dousing himself in cold water.

"It was about 10.30pm last night. My wife Janine was getting ready for bed and suddenly she let out a scream," he told the Daily Mail in the UK.

"She said there was a spider in the bathroom and asked me to get rid of it - neither she or the kids would go in there.

"The spider had crawled into the recess behind the loo and there was no way I could get to it.

"Stupid as it is, I grabbed a can of deodorant and a lighter and sprayed it behind the loo. The flame shot out and went round the back of the toilet and came back out at me.

"It was a bit of a shock. I've got two burned fingers and a burned knuckle.."

A fire brigade spokesman said firemen found no evidence of the spider, dead or alive.

"We're not entirely sure whether the spider got away or not but there was no sign of it at the scene," said the Essex Fire Service spokesman.

------------------------------------------

I for one welcome our new indestructible arachnid overlords. :p

This post has been edited by Sombra: 01 September 2010 - 10:43 AM

"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
0

#191 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

  • The Recidivist
  • Group: LHTEC
  • Posts: 2,371
  • Joined: 17-January 08
  • Location:Oz
  • Interests:Dungeons and Dragons, and the odd caramel slice.
  • The AIJman cometh

Posted 01 September 2010 - 11:29 AM

View PostSombra, on 01 August 2010 - 06:54 AM, said:

This one has been done to death in the DB, but it's still kinda funny ... if a tad disturbing:

------------------------------------------

http://www.news.com....r-1225899497234


Sigh....why do we always get the nuts?
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


0

#192 User is offline   worry 

  • Master of the Deck
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 14,708
  • Joined: 24-February 10
  • Location:the buried west

Posted 04 September 2010 - 06:14 PM

A dog has given birth to a humanoid mutant puppy. I guess you can take it with a grain of salt, but there are pictures!
http://do-while.com/...es-human-being/
They came with white hands and left with red hands.
0

#193 User is offline   stone monkey 

  • I'm the baddest man alive and I don't plan to die...
  • PipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPipPip
  • Group: (COPPA) Users Awaiting Moderatio
  • Posts: 2,369
  • Joined: 28-July 03
  • Location:The Rainy City

Posted 09 September 2010 - 09:24 PM

We're in so much trouble now...

:veryangry:
If an opinion contrary to your own makes you angry, that is a sign that you are subconsciously aware of having no good reason for thinking as you do. If some one maintains that two and two are five, or that Iceland is on the equator, you feel pity rather than anger, unless you know so little of arithmetic or geography that his opinion shakes your own contrary conviction. … So whenever you find yourself getting angry about a difference of opinion, be on your guard; you will probably find, on examination, that your belief is going beyond what the evidence warrants. Bertrand Russell

#194 User is offline   MTS 

  • Fourth Investiture
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 4,334
  • Joined: 02-April 07
  • Location:Terra Australis

Posted 10 September 2010 - 05:52 AM

It's starting.

*hears the sound of Nico's shotgun being cocked*
Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem.

Si hoc adfixum in obice legere potes, et liberaliter educatus et nimis propinquus ades.
0

#195 User is offline   Dag 

  • Burninating poodles since 1996
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 437
  • Joined: 12-March 07
  • Location:Vienna, Austria

Posted 11 September 2010 - 10:22 PM

Klingon opera prepares for interstellar debut

Sounds like fun, but I doubt they'll be performing it at the Vienna State Opera in the near future... :D
The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues.
0

#196 User is offline   Sindriss 

  • Walker of Edges
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 897
  • Joined: 25-May 07
  • Location:Denmark

Posted 12 September 2010 - 03:16 AM

Quote

A parent of a Year 5 student on the Sunshine Coast said his daughter was ostracised to the library after arguing with her scripture teacher about DNA.

"The scripture teacher told the class that all people were descended from Adam and Eve," he said.

"My daughter rightly pointed out, as I had been teaching her about DNA and science, that 'wouldn't they all be inbred'?

"But the teacher replied that DNA wasn't invented then."

After the parent complained, the girl spent the rest of the year's classes in the library.


What the ****?????? How on earth can the school/teacher place that girl in the library for the rest of the year, just because she told the teacher about a very valid point. This is so ridiculous, I am at a shortage for words.

I actually don't know much about how religious people are down here, is it this bad some places?

Quote

I would like to know if Steve have ever tasted anything like the quorl white milk, that knocked the bb's out.

A: Nope, but I gots me a good imagination.
0

#197 User is offline   MTS 

  • Fourth Investiture
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 4,334
  • Joined: 02-April 07
  • Location:Terra Australis

Posted 12 September 2010 - 04:36 AM

I'm not really sure as I don't live in Queensland, but I imagine there are cases like that the world over. I've only read of stuff like that happening here once or twice in the news though. Not that it doesn't happen, but it doesn't seem to be a widespread issue.
Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem.

Si hoc adfixum in obice legere potes, et liberaliter educatus et nimis propinquus ades.
0

#198 User is offline   Sir Thursday 

  • House Knight
  • Group: High House Mafia
  • Posts: 1,819
  • Joined: 14-July 05
  • Location:Enfield, UK

Posted 21 September 2010 - 07:12 PM

http://www.bbc.co.uk...11380834?ref=nf

Quote

Police have admitted having technical issues after releasing an e-fit of a burglary suspect which looks like a man wearing a lettuce.

Don't look now, but I think there's something weird attached to the bottom of my posts.
0

#199 User is offline   Captain Beardface 

  • Mason of Serc
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 147
  • Joined: 03-March 09
  • Location:Savannah
  • Interests:Rugby, Darts, Quality Beer, Heavy Metal... Hard Rock in general

Posted 22 September 2010 - 01:24 AM

If he wasn't badass enough, Sir Terry Pratchett forges a sword in honor of his knighthood.
Monsignor:...Now, we must all fear evil men. But there is another kind of evil which we must fear most, and that is the indifference of good men.
Connor: [as the brothers exit the church] I do believe the monsignor's finally got the point.
Murphy: Aye.

Boondock Saints
0

#200 User is offline   Dag 

  • Burninating poodles since 1996
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 437
  • Joined: 12-March 07
  • Location:Vienna, Austria

Posted 22 September 2010 - 06:37 AM

Not really weird, but pretty interesting... :)

Wind could have parted Red Sea for Moses

More details about the computer simulation:

Parting the waters: Computer modeling applies physics to Red Sea escape route

The resesarch article can be found here:

Dynamics of Wind Setdown at Suez and the Eastern Nile Delta
The problem with people who have no vices is that generally you can be pretty sure they're going to have some pretty annoying virtues.
0

Share this topic:


  • 38 Pages +
  • « First
  • 8
  • 9
  • 10
  • 11
  • 12
  • Last »
  • You cannot start a new topic
  • You cannot reply to this topic

9 User(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 9 guests, 0 anonymous users