The corrupt a wish game.

#521 Jade-Green Pig-Hog Swine-Beast

Knight Seneschal

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Interests:Fencing, ninpo, didjeridu, good books, good films and irn-bru.
Pre-dinner mayonnaise -- it's good for you!

Posted 20 August 2011 - 10:34 PM

Nature rose up and ate Chicago but destroyed all you ever loved as well, leaving you terribly, terribly alone. As per your wish, Seattle fell from the sky and crushed you to a bloody, dead pulp.

I wish that Gust would find a better hobby...

EDIT: COOOOOCCCCCCCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

This post has been edited by Jade-Green Pig-Hog Swine-Beast: 20 August 2011 - 10:35 PM

The love I bear thee can afford no better term than this: thou art a villain.

"Perhaps we think up our own destinies and so, in a sense, deserve whatever happens to us, for not having had the wit to imagine something better." ― Iain Banks

#522 Ain't_It_Just_

The Recidivist

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The AIJman cometh

Posted 21 August 2011 - 01:48 AM

Granted. It involves bag-piping loudly outside your house at 3am.

I wish that I had the power to instantly commit things to memory.

Suck it Errant!

"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.

#523 Darkwatch

A Strange Human

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1.6180339887

Posted 21 August 2011 - 01:54 AM

Ain, on 21 August 2011 - 01:48 AM, said:

Granted. It involves bag-piping loudly outside your house at 3am.

I wish that I had the power to instantly commit things to memory.

So it shall be! You do not however control it. It is a passive and on at all times. Then you walk in on your grandparents BDSM bestiality dungeon. You're committed and never speak again.

I wish I didn't procrastinate so much.

The Pub is Always Open

Proud supporter of the Wolves of Winter. Glory be to her Majesty, The Lady Snow.
Cursed Summer returns. The Lady Now Sleeps.

The Sexy Thatch Burning Physicist

Τον Πρωτος Αληθη Δεσποτην της Οικιας Αυτος

RodeoRanch said:

You're a rock.
A non-touching itself rock.

#524 tiam

Ascendant

Group: Mott Irregulars
Posts: 3,948
Joined: 26-January 06

Posted 21 August 2011 - 11:33 AM

Darkwatch, on 21 August 2011 - 01:54 AM, said:

Ain, on 21 August 2011 - 01:48 AM, said:

Granted. It involves bag-piping loudly outside your house at 3am.

I wish that I had the power to instantly commit things to memory.

You become an ultra organised anti social behemoth that everyone hated leaving you with a gaping hole in your life...a hole that could be filled with procrastination however you are tied by part one.

I wish I could have gotten my Masters this year...

#525 wade

more interesting African Swallow of Low House PEN

Group: Tehol's Blissful Chickens
Posts: 208
Joined: 02-June 11

Posted 21 August 2011 - 02:36 PM

Arsewipe McBogroll the Third, on 21 August 2011 - 11:33 AM, said:

You did. However, upon celebrating, you ran into the street, waving your Masters degree above your head when an unnaturally strong gust of wind catches on the paper, and whisks you through the atmosphere, and into space. Where you die.

I wish my friends weren't always so damn busy (or so they say) on the weekends.

This post has been edited by wade-newb: 21 August 2011 - 02:38 PM

#526 Bauchelain the Evil

Greatest necromancer ever

Group: Team Quick Ben
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Not much

Posted 21 August 2011 - 02:43 PM

Granted. Instead they have a crazy party at your place that completely destroys your house , thus leaving you with nowhere to live.

I wish I had a purse which never goes out of money.

Adept of Team Quick Ben

I greet you as guests and so will not crush the life from you and devour your soul with peals of laughter. No, instead, I will make tea-Gothos

#527 Coco with marshmallows

DIIIIIIIIIIVVVEEEEE

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Posted 21 August 2011 - 03:02 PM

Bauchelain the Evil, on 21 August 2011 - 02:43 PM, said:

I wish I had a purse which never goes out of money.

Granted.

however the next day there is a massive collapse of the worldwide economy, resorting us all to a barter system and making money worthless.

I wish I had Bar Rafaeli on speed dial on my mobile

meh. Link was dead :(

#528 Ain't_It_Just_

The Recidivist

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The AIJman cometh

Posted 21 August 2011 - 10:09 PM

Granted. But it doesn't mean he wants to talk to you.

I wish Lexs phone was more reliable.

Suck it Errant!

"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.

#529 Darkwatch

A Strange Human

Group: The Most Holy and Exalted Inquis
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1.6180339887

Posted 21 August 2011 - 10:20 PM

Ain, on 21 August 2011 - 10:09 PM, said:

Granted. But it doesn't mean he wants to talk to you.

I wish Lexs phone was more reliable.

Granted, but he is out of town.

I wish more people knew who Bar Rafaeli was.

RodeoRanch said:

You're a rock.
A non-touching itself rock.

#530 HoosierDaddy

Believer

Group: Malaz Regular
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Posted 21 August 2011 - 10:36 PM

Granted. You no longer get to educate the young by posting pictures of Bar in a bikini.

I wish I could finish this stupid book.

Trouble arrives when the opponents to such a system institute its extreme opposite, where individualism becomes godlike and sacrosanct, and no greater service to any other ideal (including community) is possible. In such a system rapacious greed thrives behind the guise of freedom, and the worst aspects of human nature come to the fore....

#531 Gust Hubb

Necromancer Extraordinaire

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Around, just quiet....er

Posted 21 August 2011 - 10:55 PM

Done. However your taste in books has dramatically dropped and you are moving onto Goodkind next.

I wish it rained all the time.

"You don't clean u other peoples messes.... You roll in them like a dog on leftover smoked whitefish torn out f the trash by raccoons after Sunday brunch on a hot day."
~Abyss

#532 Bauchelain the Evil

Greatest necromancer ever

Group: Team Quick Ben
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Not much

Posted 22 August 2011 - 01:26 PM

Granted. Great Flood Version 2 coming soon.

I wish here it was 20 degrees instead of 40.

Adept of Team Quick Ben

I greet you as guests and so will not crush the life from you and devour your soul with peals of laughter. No, instead, I will make tea-Gothos

#533 Ain't_It_Just_

The Recidivist

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The AIJman cometh

Posted 23 August 2011 - 12:26 AM

Granted, but the sudden drop in temperature causes people to believe the Apocalypse is nigh, setting off a chain reaction of rape, pillage and murder.

I wish I could forgive myself more easily.

Suck it Errant!

"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.

#534 Abyss

abyssus abyssum invocat

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Posted 23 August 2011 - 05:00 AM

You forgive yourself, easily and frequently and with great enthusiasm, so much so that you get a scorching genital rash and walk funny for at least a week.

I wish I had a massive cold stone icecreamery cookie dough/brownie combo.

THIS IS YOUR REMINDER THAT THERE IS A
'VIEW NEW CONTENT' BUTTON THAT
ALLOWS YOU TO VIEW NEW CONTENT

#535 Knowing

Corporal

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Posts: 58
Joined: 05-March 11

Posted 23 August 2011 - 05:38 AM

You recieve the cold stone icecreamery cookie dough/brownie combo and eat it too quickly. Your head ruptures from the blinding brain freeze.

I wish I had glowing green eyes.

More life may trickle out of men through thought than through a gaping wound.
--Thomas Hardy

#536 Tapper

Lover of High House Mafia

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Posted 23 August 2011 - 08:22 AM

Your wish is granted, but after a night out, you're run over by some shithead who thought you were a traffic light.

I wish software would work.

Everyone is entitled to his own wrong opinion. - Lizrad

#537 Ain't_It_Just_

The Recidivist

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The AIJman cometh

Posted 23 August 2011 - 08:58 AM

The software works a charm...unfortunately, the software in question is SkyNet! Congratu-fucking-lations, you jump started Judgement Day :yes

I wish I had the ability to create a small pocket of reality that cannot be disturbed and is completely private.

Suck it Errant!

"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.

#538 Gust Hubb

Necromancer Extraordinaire

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Around, just quiet....er

Posted 23 August 2011 - 12:02 PM

Granted. You now have a separate pocket of reality that is 6x6x6 feet and includes just you, naked and alone.

I wish coffee wasn't so expensive.

"You don't clean u other peoples messes.... You roll in them like a dog on leftover smoked whitefish torn out f the trash by raccoons after Sunday brunch on a hot day."
~Abyss

#539 Ain't_It_Just_

The Recidivist

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The AIJman cometh

Posted 23 August 2011 - 12:18 PM

Granted, but the price of EVERYTHING ELSE goes up, and wars are now fought over stuff such as sand and ozone, creating the darkest chapter in human history.

I wish my leg didn't hurt for no reason.

Suck it Errant!

"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>

It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.

#540 Gothos

Map painting expert

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Posted 23 August 2011 - 12:25 PM

Granted. It now hurts because a cannonball hit it and ripped most of your knee off.

I wish I was better at talking to women.

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.