[Cause]

Interesting weekend:

While traveling for work in St Louis a year and a half ago I met a women while ordering dinner for one at the bar seating. She was seated next to me we hit it off and went on 4 dates in 4 days. Left for our hometowns and staid in touch trying to organize a meet up. Eventually she broke it off. These things happen and I kicked myself for not meeting up sooner but wasn't exactly shocked it didn't last. She asked if she could call me this weekend. Said she has been thinking of me and has been going through therapy and basically said she regrets how she ended it and feels guilty about it too, and part of the therapy she is going though is to not avoid healthy relationships. She didnt seem to be reaching out to reconnect just to apologize. Didn't really know what to say to that except to wish her well. Not sure how to react to it really or what to feel except a little disappointment for what could have been. Feels like such a toxic internet troll thing to say but it appears I really did finish last for being too nice. Not really what I want to walk away from this feeling but a small piece of it is there.

Funnily enough a former colleague also called me. A year and half later he was installing the instrument on site for that same trip, after they finally purchased. Apparently the one postdoc asked about where the South African with the pretty eyes was. I remember talking to her, and asking her about her work and getting along well. It felt nice to hear it.

I dont think of myself as particularly attractive. I know I am overweight and always want to do something about it but never really seem to crack it. I never really seem to get that much attention but I also think I am partly blind to it. I was debilitatingly shy as a child and I grew out of it around university but when it comes to women that shyness remains. Not that I cant talk to them but in that I misread the signs and am risk averse to putting myself out there. I also have realized recently that I really cant take a compliment. I often assume people say them to be polite or when it comes to constructive criticism at work I feel like the compliment is meant to soften the blow of the critique. Which I know is a real technique. I think I am good at my job but I realized compliments just slide of my back, they dont make me happy and I dount feel pride from them but on the other hand I always assume criticism is real.

Anyway just something I have been reflecting on recently and these two incidents back to back just kind of highlighted it.

[Abyss]

Mentalist, on 03 March 2024 - 07:32 PM, said:

Abyss, on 03 March 2024 - 12:27 AM, said:

Mentalist, on 02 March 2024 - 02:29 AM, said:

Tsundoku, on 02 March 2024 - 01:15 AM, said:

Mentalist, on 02 March 2024 - 01:04 AM, said:

Best of luck, Taste.

WMWMG: highly ironic, since I wrote that the melting snow was making me happy. On the way to run some errands and drop off mail, I took a beachside walk. And got my foot caught in meltwater. ... soaking my feet and ankles in a hot bath, while sipping on a Kraken. Exasperating adventure, would absolutely suck to wake up with a cold tomorrow from this. Moral of the story is, I guess, to always bring a spare pair of socks when traipsing about spring snow.

What is this "snow" of which you speak?

The frozen water that keeps drop bears, giant spiders, snakes and other lethal critters away.

What kind of lame torontoesque nonsense were you wearing on your feet that the water got thru in the first place?

I've been in Wasaga the past month or so. And I was wearing New Balance spring runners. (MX623AB- my all season "wet weather footwear" )

It's WINTER. I swear, temp goes above 5 degrees for 5min and every Ontarian west of Kingston forgets where they live.

[Abyss]

Cause, on 04 March 2024 - 03:50 PM, said:

...call me this weekend. Said she has been thinking of me and has been going through therapy and basically said she regrets how she ended it and feels guilty about it too, and part of the therapy she is going though is to not avoid healthy relationships. She didnt seem to be reaching out to reconnect just to apologize....

I hate this closure bs that inflicts someone's issues on someone else who had zero reason to think about this.
It wasn't a healthy relationship Cause, it was a four day semi-fling she's retroactively transforming into something it wasn't to make herself feel better. Don't give it more cred or braintime than it deserves.

Quote

...the one postdoc asked about where the South African with the pretty eyes was. I remember talking to her, and asking her about her work and getting along well. It felt nice to hear it...

Take the win. Strut.

[Mentalist]

Abyss, on 04 March 2024 - 04:41 PM, said:

Mentalist, on 03 March 2024 - 07:32 PM, said:

Abyss, on 03 March 2024 - 12:27 AM, said:

Mentalist, on 02 March 2024 - 02:29 AM, said:

Tsundoku, on 02 March 2024 - 01:15 AM, said:

Mentalist, on 02 March 2024 - 01:04 AM, said:

Best of luck, Taste.

WMWMG: highly ironic, since I wrote that the melting snow was making me happy. On the way to run some errands and drop off mail, I took a beachside walk. And got my foot caught in meltwater. ... soaking my feet and ankles in a hot bath, while sipping on a Kraken. Exasperating adventure, would absolutely suck to wake up with a cold tomorrow from this. Moral of the story is, I guess, to always bring a spare pair of socks when traipsing about spring snow.

What is this "snow" of which you speak?

The frozen water that keeps drop bears, giant spiders, snakes and other lethal critters away.

What kind of lame torontoesque nonsense were you wearing on your feet that the water got thru in the first place?

I've been in Wasaga the past month or so. And I was wearing New Balance spring runners. (MX623AB- my all season "wet weather footwear" )

It's WINTER. I swear, temp goes above 5 degrees for 5min and every Ontarian west of Kingston forgets where they live.

You're saying that like Kingson still has winters.
People were telling me horror stories about it before I went to Queens, but then it was typical southern Ontarin weather, with rainstroms in December and all.

As for myself, I've spent 3 winters in Winnipeg, so anytime I see the sun in the spring I'm raring to go.

[Cause]

Abyss, on 04 March 2024 - 04:48 PM, said:

Cause, on 04 March 2024 - 03:50 PM, said:

...call me this weekend. Said she has been thinking of me and has been going through therapy and basically said she regrets how she ended it and feels guilty about it too, and part of the therapy she is going though is to not avoid healthy relationships. She didnt seem to be reaching out to reconnect just to apologize....

I hate this closure bs that inflicts someone's issues on someone else who had zero reason to think about this.
It wasn't a healthy relationship Cause, it was a four day semi-fling she's retroactively transforming into something it wasn't to make herself feel better. Don't give it more cred or braintime than it deserves.

No, I don’t disagree. The call was for her benefit not mine. I knew that. I never had grand ambitions for the relationship but 6 months of meeting in cities across America for weekend adventures seemed like it would have been a grand time.

[Raymond Luxury Yacht]

Sorry to welcome you to the club tiste. I was pretty bummed when I got diagnosed but by getting my weight down and changing my diet I’ve basically got it in remission to the point that my doctor does t really even want to talk about it anymore and doesn’t require any of the standard diabetic care. I wouldn’t worry about eliminating bacon and cheese as much as I would focus on getting rid of carbs. Anyways this is manageable and not the doomsday scenario you might be imagining, as long as you do what you can to fix things. If you ignore it it will fuck you up though. I’m available to talk about it any time, whether it’s diet stuff or general support.

[Tiste Simeon]

Raymond Luxury Yacht, on 05 March 2024 - 05:45 AM, said:

Sorry to welcome you to the club tiste. I was pretty bummed when I got diagnosed but by getting my weight down and changing my diet I’ve basically got it in remission to the point that my doctor does t really even want to talk about it anymore and doesn’t require any of the standard diabetic care. I wouldn’t worry about eliminating bacon and cheese as much as I would focus on getting rid of carbs. Anyways this is manageable and not the doomsday scenario you might be imagining, as long as you do what you can to fix things. If you ignore it it will fuck you up though. I’m available to talk about it any time, whether it’s diet stuff or general support.

Thanks man, yeah it's given me a kick up the backside to actually be a bit more sensible with my eating. As a result I am currently permanently hungry haha but I'm quite determined to get it in remission.

I think we're friends on FB right, I'll drop you a message there at some point

[Maark Abbott]

Went up to the loft for something earlier. Huge reek of [LYNX AFRICA]. Wasn't there other day. Had [FINE GENTLEMEN] acting [AS EXPECTED] on Monday [OER THEER] which caused me to finally [RING NAN] and this morning the [PANDAS AT THE ZOO] have said they'll probably look to get a [SEAGULL SNAKE] to have a look at [SNOW UP TOP].

Pretty scared to be honest, enough so to code the above. You can probably work out what's going on though.

[Gorefest]

I'm mostly with you on the ringwraiths hiding in your attic and your animal informants keeping tabs on it, but I'm pretty sure there isn't any snow forecast in Barnsley this weekend. Very odd.

[Maark Abbott]

Gorefest, on 08 March 2024 - 09:26 AM, said:

I'm mostly with you on the ringwraiths hiding in your attic and your animal informants keeping tabs on it, but I'm pretty sure there isn't any snow forecast in Barnsley this weekend. Very odd.

a green pointy thing in a ceramic container, then many of them camping out at bestival together, also baseball bats

[Tsundoku]

Google translate is missing a lot of context here ...

Hope all's well though.

This post has been edited by Tsundoku: 08 March 2024 - 10:20 AM

[Azath Vitr (D'ivers]

Maark Abbott, on 08 March 2024 - 08:47 AM, said:

Went up to the loft for something earlier. Huge reek of [LYNX AFRICA]. Wasn't there other day. Had [FINE GENTLEMEN] acting [AS EXPECTED] on Monday [OER THEER] which caused me to finally [RING NAN] and this morning the [PANDAS AT THE ZOO] have said they'll probably look to get a [SEAGULL SNAKE] to have a look at [SNOW UP TOP].

Pretty scared to be honest, enough so to code the above. You can probably work out what's going on though.

Popeye blind to the polly in the hole... Spatchko at the rozz-shop.

Oh wait, that's a few years from now....

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 08 March 2024 - 12:08 PM

[amphibian]

I still don't know what Lynx Africa represents, but if it's your neighbors doing meth, definitely drop that anonymous dime. Weed, whatever, easier to stay out of it. Meth is a not even once kinda thing for the neighborhood.

[Cause]

Maark Abbott, on 08 March 2024 - 08:47 AM, said:

Went up to the loft for something earlier. Huge reek of [LYNX AFRICA]. Wasn't there other day. Had [FINE GENTLEMEN] acting [AS EXPECTED] on Monday [OER THEER] which caused me to finally [RING NAN] and this morning the [PANDAS AT THE ZOO] have said they'll probably look to get a [SEAGULL SNAKE] to have a look at [SNOW UP TOP].

Pretty scared to be honest, enough so to code the above. You can probably work out what's going on though.

Are we speaking in code in case they wiretapped the forum?

[Cyphon]

It's coz of Tiste. Can he crack the code though?

[Tiste Simeon]

Cyphon, on 08 March 2024 - 09:34 PM, said:

It's coz of Tiste. Can he crack the code though?

Nah he's thick, he isn't a cop any more and most importantly he doesn't care enough 😂

[Maark Abbott]

Cause, on 08 March 2024 - 09:20 PM, said:

Maark Abbott, on 08 March 2024 - 08:47 AM, said:

Went up to the loft for something earlier. Huge reek of [LYNX AFRICA]. Wasn't there other day. Had [FINE GENTLEMEN] acting [AS EXPECTED] on Monday [OER THEER] which caused me to finally [RING NAN] and this morning the [PANDAS AT THE ZOO] have said they'll probably look to get a [SEAGULL SNAKE] to have a look at [SNOW UP TOP].

Pretty scared to be honest, enough so to code the above. You can probably work out what's going on though.

Are we speaking in code in case they wiretapped the forum?

Yes because I have legitimate safety concerns at this point. I have a bit of drum hardware akin to a club to hand at all times in case they try our door.

I really hope the rozzers do something about it, it's been two years of it at this point.

[Azath Vitr (D'ivers]

Maark Abbott, on 09 March 2024 - 11:10 AM, said:

Cause, on 08 March 2024 - 09:20 PM, said:

Maark Abbott, on 08 March 2024 - 08:47 AM, said:

Went up to the loft for something earlier. Huge reek of [LYNX AFRICA]. Wasn't there other day. Had [FINE GENTLEMEN] acting [AS EXPECTED] on Monday [OER THEER] which caused me to finally [RING NAN] and this morning the [PANDAS AT THE ZOO] have said they'll probably look to get a [SEAGULL SNAKE] to have a look at [SNOW UP TOP].

Pretty scared to be honest, enough so to code the above. You can probably work out what's going on though.

Are we speaking in code in case they wiretapped the forum?

Yes because I have legitimate safety concerns at this point. I have a bit of drum hardware akin to a club to hand at all times in case they try our door.

I really hope the rozzers do something about it, it's been two years of it at this point.

There's probably a movie or tv show in which a group of thugs with baseball bats attacks someone who (unbeknownst to them) is a master drummer and proceeds to rapidly pummel them with makeshift drumsticks. But you'd have to be a very fast drummer to take out a group of more than two or three... and be in a movie or tv show unfortunately I think (unless you're a robot or a cyborg of course). But wait: what if the master drummer is also an expert gamer, with chokepoints and booby-traps already set up? Maybe then.... (That might be an interesting rhythmic drumming game.)

Of course we hope you remain safe. It seems very unlikely that they'd be hacking their neighbors' internet in search of the Cricetomys gambianus, or that they'd go around attacking all their neighbors as potential "suspects". Hopefully you haven't told anyone who might tell them. If the pandas are in on it then the fine gentlemen breeding felidae over yonder probably aren't concerned about people calling the zoo and so probably won't bother you.

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 09 March 2024 - 01:48 PM

[Lady Bliss]

I’d go see that movie.

[Maark Abbott]

It's at the point where it fucking stinks too, going up into my loft is like having a stoner breathing it directly into my mouth. Sick of it. Just want them to fuck off.