QuickTidal, on 05 February 2026 - 02:12 PM, said:
The Birthday Cake Incident; Kids are Ridiculous: a tale of my household
So on my actual birthday, my wife bought a small cake to have, between the four of us. I was full from dinner so I chose to not have a piece right away. The kids did, and my wife did. That's fine. The next night my kids wanted more of the cake for dessert, so did my wife, which again was fine, but once again I was full from dinner and didn't feel like having any.
Now we are up to last night. There is the equivalent of 2 small pieces left. And I had a small enough dinner to accommodate having a slice...but I was sitting downstairs and my daughter comes up and asks if she can have cake. I said, "I'm pretty sure that there's only really two pieces left, and I think one is for me, and one is for you mother"...she kind of moaned about that and spent the next 15 minutes trying to wheedle a piece of cake out of the scenario, and when I basically stood firm on no and said "If we give you one of the pieces then your brother is going to want one too, and it would be unfair not to let him have one...which would leave us with no cake", she then went to my wife in a different room...now it gets interesting....wife tells her that if she wants to she can split the piece she was going to have of the two pieces in two and give one half to her brother and one half for herself, leaving the final piece for me.
So my daughter, went and cut out the piece of cake and divided it...poorly...with one half of the piece being larger (which she grabbed)....summoned my son from upstairs, who came down and promptly told her that she had cut it badly and was getting more than him. He then came to me crying that he was not getting the same amount of cake.
It was at this point that I basically said "Forget it, I don't need a piece of cake." I said "take my piece and your sister can have the other piece and I just won't have any"...
Well, this was the wrong tactic because kids put a LOT of stock into birthday cake. So they both computed that I would not be getting a piece of cake from my own birthday cake...and it upset them both.
But my wife had had enough of the whining and wheedling and arguing and so she took everyone's cake pieces (including mine) and tossed them all in the garbage.
Well this created an even worse uproar. My 9 year old started SOBBING uncontrollably that I would not get a piece of my own cake now and my 7 year old son opened his mouth and screamed at my wife with a demonic voice how evil she was for the fact that I would not get a piece of my own cake.
I came upstairs again at this point and tried to explain that it didn't matter to me, and cake is not as important to me as it must be to them...but both demanded my wife now buy me a NEW cake so that I could have a piece.
There was a tentative agreement that something would happen, but nothing concrete. I don't know if another cake will be bought.
I don't even really want any cake...I'm not a huge cake person. I'll eat it occasionally, but I don't mind not having any. I was happy the initial night to not have any and watch everyone else enjoy...the only reason I said no on the third night was so my kids didn't eat sugary cake three nights running.
What a complete and total shitshow. LOL
eDIT: Also if you have more than one kid, you will FOREVER being dividing things, getting everyone the same thing, getting equivalent shit to be "fair"....FOREVER in every instance or everything that they get. And gods help you if you get them slightly DIFFERENT versions of the same thing...
It gives me a strange sense of peace to hear this shite happening other than in my own household.
I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.