What's messing with your groove?
#27341
Posted 15 September 2020 - 10:50 PM
There are, and pretty good ones, actually. He can't terminate our lease without a damned good reason, buuuut there are loopholes and we're living in a textbook case of possible loopholes. It's an old ass house (by which I mean, I've got pictures of it with people driving by in carriages) which are very popular nowadays but only when renovated, and we pay awfully little for the amount of space we've got (by which I mean, just barely over half the local average per square metre). Now, because the house is so old its entire infrastructure (pipes and stuff) is also old, so to properly renovate it to modern standards would mean pretty much ripping it apart on the inside, and that's the main reason it's so cheap. As far as I'm concerned, we've got warm and running water and a mostly working heating system and the roof isn't leaking, so we're perfectly fine and the shortcomings can be dealt with. On the other hand, the property itself is prime real estate as far as its location is concerned. So, what could he do? For one, he could raise the rent (though there are rules about how much, so we're not worried about that). He could also renovate the hell out of this place and THEN raise the rent. The most worrying possibility is though that he somehow can manage to prove to officials that keeping the house as is would cost more than completely renovating it (despite the strict provisions on renovating a place that's subject to monument conservation laws), which is a possibility, at which point he can kick everyone out, renovate the entire thing and lease it for a lot more money, or just outright sell the individual apartments. This has been an ongoing and well known problem in Germany for years and years now: landlords and investment companies are buying up old houses where rent is cheap because they are old, doing massive renovations and either bullying the tenants until they move out by raising the rent for every little loophole-y thing or "convincing" someone high up in the city council that the entire place needs to be basically redone, thus allowing them to terminate leases. Politics has been all vocal about this being boo boo and doing nothing about it. It's a huuuge problem in the big cities (Berlin, Munich, Hamburg, Cologne) and to be honest I did not expect that to happen in our tiny town but I guess the push out from the big cities is getting more real and they were hoping for some big money by quickly renovating an old house. Naaatch.
Now, to be fair, I've been considering moving away recently simply to have better job opportunities and also because I take an hour to get pretty much anywhere, BUT on the other hand, this place is actually REALLY nice (though also really creaky) and I used to have plans to, err, outsource my mom to a more pensioner-friendly place at some point when the stairs would become too much of a burden for her, and turn the living room into an atelier. We can see almost the entire town center from there, it's an amazing view. It's been a matter of time until someone else gets ideas about that house and after some deliberation we've agreed that we'll be splitting household at some point within the next year or two. If another person - you know, someone you can actually talk to - had bought the house and approached us and the other tenants (at least those I've talked to) about the whole issue we'd listen and see if we can come to an agreement, like, cool, you want to renovate within the next two years and we're not averse to moving out (as is the case for at least two other neighbours I know of), how about we work together? But instead this clown thought he could make a quick buck, comes in shouting about how this is his property and completely ignoring everything we say (like the fact that he's requiered to warn us before turning off the water in the entire house and the broken door that's been like that since at least March) and is somehow making us out to be at fault for his own stupidity.
Nah, fuck that. He can go suck a certain body part of his.
Now, to be fair, I've been considering moving away recently simply to have better job opportunities and also because I take an hour to get pretty much anywhere, BUT on the other hand, this place is actually REALLY nice (though also really creaky) and I used to have plans to, err, outsource my mom to a more pensioner-friendly place at some point when the stairs would become too much of a burden for her, and turn the living room into an atelier. We can see almost the entire town center from there, it's an amazing view. It's been a matter of time until someone else gets ideas about that house and after some deliberation we've agreed that we'll be splitting household at some point within the next year or two. If another person - you know, someone you can actually talk to - had bought the house and approached us and the other tenants (at least those I've talked to) about the whole issue we'd listen and see if we can come to an agreement, like, cool, you want to renovate within the next two years and we're not averse to moving out (as is the case for at least two other neighbours I know of), how about we work together? But instead this clown thought he could make a quick buck, comes in shouting about how this is his property and completely ignoring everything we say (like the fact that he's requiered to warn us before turning off the water in the entire house and the broken door that's been like that since at least March) and is somehow making us out to be at fault for his own stupidity.
Nah, fuck that. He can go suck a certain body part of his.
Puck was not birthed, she was cleaved from a lava flow and shaped by a fierce god's hands. - [worry]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
#27342
Posted 16 September 2020 - 08:26 AM
2020 just keeps getting better for you guys - how's Sally looking at the moment?
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes
"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys
"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys
"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
#27343
Posted 16 September 2020 - 02:01 PM
Oh god. There's this whole mum social networking world that opens up when your kid starts school. I didn't know. Year group Facebook and WhatsApp groups. I joined the FB one - will stay below the radar while I figure out how awful they are. It's going to be really awful competitive mum-ing right?
Burn rubber =/= warp speed
#27344
Posted 16 September 2020 - 02:25 PM
Legends are told about the Danish public schools' parent network. The amount of flame wars fought about whether sugar is allowed to be given to kids alone is staggering.
#27345
Posted 16 September 2020 - 03:35 PM
Mezla PigDog, on 16 September 2020 - 02:01 PM, said:
Oh god. There's this whole mum social networking world that opens up when your kid starts school. I didn't know. Year group Facebook and WhatsApp groups. I joined the FB one - will stay below the radar while I figure out how awful they are. It's going to be really awful competitive mum-ing right?
Yes. It's awful.
This happened to us when eldest began daycare 3 years back and my wife mostly took up the responsibilities of it because I am neither social like she is, nor could I be arsed to do it and be nice to people I don't know just because our kids attend the same care centre. She found out within about a month how these groups are little gossip circles that foment bad feelings often, and learned that only about 4 or 5 parents were nice and not all all mean and rich fake people...
We expect this will just expand with different parents once she's physically in her JK public school (she's online for now during COVID)...but for now it's just that daycare circle (which we are still in because of our son who goes there).
Just don't bother with the assholes and see if you can find a parent or two you can get along with.
"When the last tree has fallen, and the rivers are poisoned, you cannot eat money, oh no." ~Aurora
“Someone will always try to sell you despair, just so they don't feel alone.” ~Ursula Vernon
“Someone will always try to sell you despair, just so they don't feel alone.” ~Ursula Vernon
#27346
Posted 16 September 2020 - 05:49 PM
First season of Big Little Lies on HBO, watch it. It amplifies the catty politics that a cabal of mothers torture each other with. So rich and decadent in watching a coven of mothers be two faced to each other. And hooboy, if your little one just happens to tussle with another's perfect angel, look out! Their little Sally or Oliver can do no wrong and your kid is hell on legs who is a product of shitty parenting.
Advice: Day drinking. Work it in to your normal routine. Find that box of Chardonnay or Pinot Grise and let it work its magic. I call it "mommy go-go juice."
Advice: Day drinking. Work it in to your normal routine. Find that box of Chardonnay or Pinot Grise and let it work its magic. I call it "mommy go-go juice."
#27347
Posted 17 September 2020 - 04:52 PM
Fuckin hell. On the drive in, smoke blanketing the whole area. And it triggered a pounding headache. This shit is crazy.
#27348
Posted 18 September 2020 - 02:37 AM
Yeah mezla mom group’s season toxic
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#27350
Posted 19 September 2020 - 12:06 AM
Fuck this fucking year.
I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.
#27351
Posted 19 September 2020 - 02:15 AM
Briar King, on 18 September 2020 - 04:53 PM, said:
Holy macaroni if we have to leave flood prone Houston to escape Alpha I might just finally curl up into a little ball and not stretch out for quite some time. I wasn't concerned yesterday but now both here and back home is in it's cone today. It won't take much to finish off our daily new damage appearing house. Go into south TX damn you Alpha! Stop coming north!
I'm so happy I'm not prone to depression or have suicidal thoughts ever but damn I really am concerned for people I don't even know exist if this thing comes up any where from Houston to LA border this close to forgotten by everyone else but us total destruction Laura. I hope they will stay mentally healthy.
Ed ugh it's not gonna be Alpha anymore. Another beat it to that title.. it will be Beta as things stand now.
I'm so happy I'm not prone to depression or have suicidal thoughts ever but damn I really am concerned for people I don't even know exist if this thing comes up any where from Houston to LA border this close to forgotten by everyone else but us total destruction Laura. I hope they will stay mentally healthy.
Ed ugh it's not gonna be Alpha anymore. Another beat it to that title.. it will be Beta as things stand now.
Good grief, really? That sucks. Very best of luck to you BK. I know if I could, I'd move out of FL and hurricane country. Its been nice not having to deal with snow for 24 years but I can't take the summers anymore.
#27352
Posted 19 September 2020 - 04:38 PM
Having a rough time pulling out of a downward hit. It is less than 45 days till the man who killed my wife's daughter in a DUI gets out of jail after serving a meager 3 year sentence. This obviously weighs horribly on my wife as a miscarriage of justice and insult to the worst event in her life. And yesterday morning, I could see it on her face, the contortions of anger and sorrow, but she insisted she was fine, it was ok, not a big deal. She had learned to deal with anger she couldn't do anything about. Complete bollocks, and I tried to encourage her not to bottle up, especially with me; that she needed to release and feel, and I would be a safe space, like I have been through the years for her. And she just pushes me away and fakes being ok. I am so worried what happens as we get closer, and I worry she will not tell me what is going on until it is too late and her world is actively crumbling. That has happened before, less than a year ago, which contributed to my own downward spiral earlier this year.
She apologized this morning and said even if she gets annoyed at my persistence, it does mean something to her. But, I am so emotionally tired after just this small fight, and am not sure how many of these I can take. This constant up and down, often just within a day's time, are wearing me ragged when I am just trying to put myself back together.
She apologized this morning and said even if she gets annoyed at my persistence, it does mean something to her. But, I am so emotionally tired after just this small fight, and am not sure how many of these I can take. This constant up and down, often just within a day's time, are wearing me ragged when I am just trying to put myself back together.
"You don't clean u other peoples messes.... You roll in them like a dog on leftover smoked whitefish torn out f the trash by raccoons after Sunday brunch on a hot day."
~Abyss
~Abyss
#27353
Posted 19 September 2020 - 06:09 PM
Slow Ben, on 19 September 2020 - 12:06 AM, said:
Fuck this fucking year.
This.
And best of luck to BK. Cannot report having ever seen a Mexican here, the suspicious demographics here tend to be Bulgarians, Armenians and Turks.
Also, Gust, your wife needs therapy (and you probably, too). Not because anybody thinks she shouldn't be feeling anger and grief, but because allowing them to consume her will lead to more and more self-destructive behaviour. Shutting off your feelings and pretending everything is fine even though everyone can tell it's not is not strength. Nothing of what you tell here sounds healthy and these things are way too complex to expect being able to deal with them on your own. And from what I understand you both have children who deserve to not be put on the back burner for something that has happened years ago.
This post has been edited by Puck: 19 September 2020 - 06:11 PM
Puck was not birthed, she was cleaved from a lava flow and shaped by a fierce god's hands. - [worry]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
#27354
Posted 19 September 2020 - 06:24 PM
You are more than correct, and I am trying to get her counseling, though she is incredibly stubborn and avoidant. I myself am about to start a new job and will have health insurance again, and I hear your good suggestion.
"You don't clean u other peoples messes.... You roll in them like a dog on leftover smoked whitefish torn out f the trash by raccoons after Sunday brunch on a hot day."
~Abyss
~Abyss
#27355
Posted 19 September 2020 - 06:31 PM
Get counseling if you can, even if it's just you for now.
Different situation, but my experience has been that it's better than nothing. I used to have a really distorted relationship with my mother but once I got counseling, the fact alone that I changed some behaviours based on what I learned in therapy she also slowly started considering that she had made mistakes (because she saw that therapy can make a difference) and our relationship has improved significantly.
Different situation, but my experience has been that it's better than nothing. I used to have a really distorted relationship with my mother but once I got counseling, the fact alone that I changed some behaviours based on what I learned in therapy she also slowly started considering that she had made mistakes (because she saw that therapy can make a difference) and our relationship has improved significantly.
Puck was not birthed, she was cleaved from a lava flow and shaped by a fierce god's hands. - [worry]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
#27356
Posted 23 September 2020 - 05:04 PM
You know what really cheeses me off?
So on the drive in, I often listen to morning sports talk radio, especially in the Fall. These formats now often have a woman and man duo who cover the pertinent sports topics that everyone is buzzing about that day. I can't stand, and fuck it gets me hot, when the man has to "mansplain" to his on-air partner some aspect of the subject matter they are talking about. Fucking condescending and belittling someone who is every bit as knowledgeable about sports.
So on the drive in, I often listen to morning sports talk radio, especially in the Fall. These formats now often have a woman and man duo who cover the pertinent sports topics that everyone is buzzing about that day. I can't stand, and fuck it gets me hot, when the man has to "mansplain" to his on-air partner some aspect of the subject matter they are talking about. Fucking condescending and belittling someone who is every bit as knowledgeable about sports.
#27357
Posted 25 September 2020 - 08:46 AM
God damnit, I just wanted a few dry days to finish the fence at the driving range.
A FEW DRY FUCKING DAYS
Absolutely pissing it down
A FEW DRY FUCKING DAYS
Absolutely pissing it down
2012
"Imperial Gothos, Imperial"
"Imperial Gothos, Imperial"
#27358
Posted 25 September 2020 - 11:00 AM
It's raining here too.
I on the other hand am grately enjoying it. I've taken the day off. Doing some house chores and playing playstation while it's drizzling outside.
Hyggeligt!
I on the other hand am grately enjoying it. I've taken the day off. Doing some house chores and playing playstation while it's drizzling outside.
Hyggeligt!
#27359
Posted 25 September 2020 - 07:03 PM
Isn't this just dandy. Sept. 25 and today temps are going to top out in the mid 90s°F, smashing records. Do you guys thing the climate crisis is real yet?
Trump: "It will start getting cooler, just you watch." -and- "I don't think science knows, actually."
Trump: "It will start getting cooler, just you watch." -and- "I don't think science knows, actually."
#27360
Posted 26 September 2020 - 06:46 PM
I bit the bullet and got rid of mine the last time we moved. I don’t miss them.
I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.