Malazan Empire: How do you answer the phone? - Malazan Empire

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How do you answer the phone?

#1 User is offline   Lady Bliss 

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Posted 12 March 2023 - 01:26 AM

Iíve been thinking on this because I donít think that I answer the phone like normal people anymore. Saying just ďhelloĒ feels funny. Iíve been on call for so many years that my normal greeting is ďThis is blablaĒ. Is that odd? Has phone etiquette changed?
"If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die? And if you wrong us shall we not revenge?" - Shylock
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#2 User is offline   Tsundoku 

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Posted 12 March 2023 - 04:52 AM

Depends what phone I'm answering.

Mobile = "Hello" if unknown, and "Hi (name)" if I do. Very exciting. I don't like to give my name in case it's scammers.
Work = "Hello (title)" or just "Hello" if unknown ie external number.
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesnít work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#3 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 12 March 2023 - 02:46 PM

"WAAAAAASSSSAAAAAAAAAAPPPPPP???!!!!"
THIS IS YOUR REMINDER THAT THERE IS A
'VIEW NEW CONTENT' BUTTON THAT
ALLOWS YOU TO VIEW NEW CONTENT
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#4 User is offline   Aptorian 

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Posted 12 March 2023 - 04:21 PM

The only people who regularly call me now a days is scammers and sales people.

Quote

"I don't know who you are. I don't know what you want. If you are looking for ransom I can tell you I don't have money, but what I do have are a very particular set of skills. Skills I have acquired over a very long career. Skills that make me a nightmare for people like you. If you hang up now, that'll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don't, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you."

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#5 User is online   Cause 

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Posted 12 March 2023 - 06:27 PM

When Iím expecting a professional related call and itís an unknown number I say ĎHi, this is causeí. I feel like itís friendly and also lets us get to the point right away.
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#6 User is online   Cyphon 

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Posted 12 March 2023 - 06:42 PM

"Abyss, I've said no already".
Para todos todo, para nosotros nada.

MottI'd always pegged you as more of an Ublala
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#7 User is offline   Slow Ben 

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Posted 12 March 2023 - 08:44 PM

Hello, this is Slow Ben. On the business phone or an unknown number.


Yo! If itís one of my friends.

Hey ďpersons nameĒ if itís an acquaintance.


Yolo! If itís my wife, cause she thinks itís stupid.
I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.
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#8 User is offline   Slow Ben 

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Posted 12 March 2023 - 08:47 PM

And just for fun, hereís a minute of Phil Dunphy answering the phone.

Cello!

https://youtu.be/4xz5ecRezW0
I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.
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#9 User is offline   D'rek 

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Posted 12 March 2023 - 09:08 PM

Salutations!

View Postworrywort, on 14 September 2012 - 08:07 PM, said:

I kinda love it when D'rek unleashes her nerd wrath, as I knew she would here. Sorry innocent bystanders, but someone's gotta be the kindling.
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#10 User is offline   Lady Bliss 

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Posted 12 March 2023 - 10:15 PM

View PostD, on 12 March 2023 - 09:08 PM, said:

Salutations!

That reminds me of HeathersÖ
"If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die? And if you wrong us shall we not revenge?" - Shylock
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#11 User is offline   Mezla PigDog 

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Posted 13 March 2023 - 09:53 PM

People still answer the phone? 🤣

I don't answer to numbers I don't know. I can't be arsed.

I don't get work calls. Everything is pre-arranged teleconference or someone direct dialling through MS Teams after dropping me a note they are about to.

Too many instant messaging options.
Burn rubber =/= warp speed
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#12 User is offline   Puck 

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Posted 13 March 2023 - 10:49 PM

View PostSlow Ben, on 12 March 2023 - 08:44 PM, said:

Yo!


I've been told that this is apparently my signature phone call reply at work (working from home most of the time). It wasn't conscious until that point, but it is now whenever someone from I know calls just for the giggles. Otherwise it's "Hello, this is [my last name] from [company]." That said, I hate phone calls and am not ashamed to say I let it ring until someone else picks up. Not my freaking job.

Otherwise it's just a boring "Hello" but I change up the tone depending on whether I know who's calling or not.
Puck was not birthed, she was cleaved from a lava flow and shaped by a fierce god's hands. - [worry]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
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#13 User is offline   Lady Bliss 

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Posted 14 March 2023 - 12:04 AM

I wish I didnít get phone calls, but itís the nature of the type of work I do to have to get called into a crisis in the middle of the night.
"If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die? And if you wrong us shall we not revenge?" - Shylock
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#14 User is offline   LinearPhilosopher 

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Posted 14 March 2023 - 01:21 AM

First Name Last Name Speaking how may I help you.
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#15 User is offline   Gorefest 

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Posted 14 March 2023 - 08:40 AM

Reluctantly.
Yesterday, upon the stair, I saw a man who wasn't there. He wasn't there again today. Oh, how I wish he'd go away.
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