Malazan Empire: So, let's talk about sex - Malazan Empire

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So, let's talk about sex I'm having a crisis of thought...

#401 User is offline   Macros 

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Posted 04 February 2016 - 09:35 PM

To be fair it was BKs totally irrelevant post was what should have been deleted, the subsequent jokery was collateral damage.

Its been stated many times this isn't a place to brag/ boast/ make shit up about your love life, its somewhere to ask questions or, at worst, lament your lack of a love life.

you want to spout off about banging the checkout girl in a shopping trolley go to the phoenix inn, if you're worried you caught something from her, this might be the place to ask a question.
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#402 User is offline   Vengeance 

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Posted 04 February 2016 - 10:06 PM

Ok so I don't know what happened to the other post but I went ahead and removed a couple of posts about what I think happened. I can't begin to tell you how much it pains me to say this but Maccy is correct. This is a discussion board thread not an Inn thread.

Carry on.


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#403 User is offline   D'rek 

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Posted 05 February 2016 - 04:34 AM

View PostRaging Cajun Gator King, on 04 February 2016 - 10:40 PM, said:

Sigh.

Ya could ya know not read the thread Macros


That is entirely besides the point.

Perhaps this is a good time to remind everyone that section #3 of the forum's Code of Conduct is to stay on topic. That especially applies in places like the Discussion sub-forum and it also especially applies to going off-topic into 'adult content'.

As others have said, if you want a topic where posting such things IS on-topic, feel free to start one in the appropriate place (the Inn), (so long as it doesn't contravene any other parts of the Code of Conduct).

View Postworrywort, on 14 September 2012 - 08:07 PM, said:

I kinda love it when D'rek unleashes her nerd wrath, as I knew she would here. Sorry innocent bystanders, but someone's gotta be the kindling.
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#404 User is offline   Andorion 

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Posted 05 February 2016 - 04:41 AM

View PostD, on 05 February 2016 - 04:34 AM, said:

View PostRaging Cajun Gator King, on 04 February 2016 - 10:40 PM, said:

Sigh.

Ya could ya know not read the thread Macros


That is entirely besides the point.

Perhaps this is a good time to remind everyone that section #3 of the forum's Code of Conduct is to stay on topic. That especially applies in places like the Discussion sub-forum and it also especially applies to going off-topic into 'adult content'.

As others have said, if you want a topic where posting such things IS on-topic, feel free to start one in the appropriate place (the Inn), (so long as it doesn't contravene any other parts of the Code of Conduct).


Seems like a good time to ask, since this thread was started before I joined, what was the point of this thread? Sex in general as a concept and practice, sexual problems people maybe having, or there sex lives in general?

Also would it not be better to have a relationships thread for relationships problems and advice?
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#405 User is offline   D'rek 

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Posted 05 February 2016 - 05:03 AM

View PostAndorion, on 05 February 2016 - 04:41 AM, said:

Seems like a good time to ask, since this thread was started before I joined, what was the point of this thread? Sex in general as a concept and practice, sexual problems people maybe having, or there sex lives in general?


Well, looking at the front page or a random mid-page seems to consistently be on the topic of discussing relationship issues and problems related to the fallout from (or lead-up to) sexual encounters.

Quote

Also would it not be better to have a relationships thread for relationships problems and advice?


Perhaps. Those seem to mainly fall into this thread (if sex-related) or the Inn's groove thread, but a specific relationship issues thread could potentially be useful/popular, too. No one has felt the need to create one so far, but feel free to give it a try (don't force unnecessary calamities into your relationship just for the sake of creating that thread though!).

View Postworrywort, on 14 September 2012 - 08:07 PM, said:

I kinda love it when D'rek unleashes her nerd wrath, as I knew she would here. Sorry innocent bystanders, but someone's gotta be the kindling.
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#406 User is offline   amphibian 

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Posted 05 February 2016 - 05:56 AM

The most unnecessary calamity I have dealt with in a relationship was over a Fbook relationship status.

My gf at the time wanted me to put "in a relationship" but not with her specifically because she had to hide me from her family and some friends. I wanted to continue what I had going - no public info on my Fbook about any of the relationship - because it didn't seem like anyone who only knew me on there's business. Those who knew me in real life knew all about her because I had the luck/family/friends so that I didn't need to hide her from them.

I got my way, but she low key resented it for years because 1) I didn't put my words about this in a particularly nice manner and 2) she was mad about not getting her way even if it didn't make sense to me.

Even when she up and told me years later that yes, putting nothing was the best course of action, she held onto the bit about me ticking her off and not doing what she asked me to.

It's a funny story now, but dangit if we weren't genuinely irked by this happening in real time.

This post has been edited by amphibian: 05 February 2016 - 05:58 AM

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#407 User is offline   Andorion 

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Posted 05 February 2016 - 07:02 AM

View Postamphibian, on 05 February 2016 - 05:56 AM, said:

The most unnecessary calamity I have dealt with in a relationship was over a Fbook relationship status.

My gf at the time wanted me to put "in a relationship" but not with her specifically because she had to hide me from her family and some friends. I wanted to continue what I had going - no public info on my Fbook about any of the relationship - because it didn't seem like anyone who only knew me on there's business. Those who knew me in real life knew all about her because I had the luck/family/friends so that I didn't need to hide her from them.

I got my way, but she low key resented it for years because 1) I didn't put my words about this in a particularly nice manner and 2) she was mad about not getting her way even if it didn't make sense to me.

Even when she up and told me years later that yes, putting nothing was the best course of action, she held onto the bit about me ticking her off and not doing what she asked me to.

It's a funny story now, but dangit if we weren't genuinely irked by this happening in real time.


This is confusing. If you just put "In a relationship" you will forever be fending off questions from curious people. I think she wanted you to do this as she saw it as an additional layer of security/validation, but its a rather silly idea really. And to hold on to that resentment long term makes no sense
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#408 User is offline   Andorion 

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Posted 05 February 2016 - 07:21 AM

View PostD, on 05 February 2016 - 05:03 AM, said:

View PostAndorion, on 05 February 2016 - 04:41 AM, said:

Seems like a good time to ask, since this thread was started before I joined, what was the point of this thread? Sex in general as a concept and practice, sexual problems people maybe having, or there sex lives in general?


Well, looking at the front page or a random mid-page seems to consistently be on the topic of discussing relationship issues and problems related to the fallout from (or lead-up to) sexual encounters.

Quote

Also would it not be better to have a relationships thread for relationships problems and advice?


Perhaps. Those seem to mainly fall into this thread (if sex-related) or the Inn's groove thread, but a specific relationship issues thread could potentially be useful/popular, too. No one has felt the need to create one so far, but feel free to give it a try (don't force unnecessary calamities into your relationship just for the sake of creating that thread though!).


How about a change to the thread title - something like "relationships and sex" and big bolded mod post here to serve as a reminder as to the nature of the thread?
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#409 User is offline   Macros 

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Posted 05 February 2016 - 07:27 AM

Some people (imo) take bookface entirely too seriously. To the point if a relationship "isn't official" until you've set your relationship status. Im not entirely sure if this is a confidence issue or trust possibly, do they think you're running around yelling to everyone you're single because your facebook hasn't been updated?
I genuinely think social media is a contributing factor to an increase in the breakdown of relationships. Now whether it brings to light issues that may have been glossed over in a previous generation or is the actual genus of a split is obviously a case by case issue, but for those who are insecure and jealous, a partner still being friends with an ex on social media could cause them concerns. Regardless of the fact that its just a friendship, quite a lot of relationships end amicably and both parties remain on friendly terms. Some people don't seem to understand this and assume something is still going on (admittedly sometimes, they're right)

@BK, I could, you know, read the thread full of what it was supposed to be, a discussion on the human love live and its many pitfalls, not someone randomly announcing that they had sex in a laundry room, just for the sake of telling us, because you know, he's cool and getting some.

@andoran, we're in the discussion forum, and several mods over the pages have cautioned members about this degenerating into a sex version of the poop thread.

This post has been edited by Macros: 05 February 2016 - 07:29 AM

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#410 User is offline   Maark Abbott 

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Posted 05 February 2016 - 08:30 AM

View PostMacros, on 05 February 2016 - 07:27 AM, said:

Some people (imo) take bookface entirely too seriously. To the point if a relationship "isn't official" until you've set your relationship status. Im not entirely sure if this is a confidence issue or trust possibly, do they think you're running around yelling to everyone you're single because your facebook hasn't been updated?
I genuinely think social media is a contributing factor to an increase in the breakdown of relationships. Now whether it brings to light issues that may have been glossed over in a previous generation or is the actual genus of a split is obviously a case by case issue, but for those who are insecure and jealous, a partner still being friends with an ex on social media could cause them concerns. Regardless of the fact that its just a friendship, quite a lot of relationships end amicably and both parties remain on friendly terms. Some people don't seem to understand this and assume something is still going on (admittedly sometimes, they're right)

@BK, I could, you know, read the thread full of what it was supposed to be, a discussion on the human love live and its many pitfalls, not someone randomly announcing that they had sex in a laundry room, just for the sake of telling us, because you know, he's cool and getting some.

@andoran, we're in the discussion forum, and several mods over the pages have cautioned members about this degenerating into a sex version of the poop thread.


I think I'd agree. When people get "Facebook serious" it seems a little ridiculous to me, as though they have to validate their being together via a social media announcement. The amount of paranoid people I know who wind up having spats and breakdowns due to Fezbook is ridiculous.
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#411 User is offline   Primateus 

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Posted 05 February 2016 - 04:55 PM

View PostAndorion, on 05 February 2016 - 07:21 AM, said:

View PostD, on 05 February 2016 - 05:03 AM, said:

View PostAndorion, on 05 February 2016 - 04:41 AM, said:

Seems like a good time to ask, since this thread was started before I joined, what was the point of this thread? Sex in general as a concept and practice, sexual problems people maybe having, or there sex lives in general?


Well, looking at the front page or a random mid-page seems to consistently be on the topic of discussing relationship issues and problems related to the fallout from (or lead-up to) sexual encounters.

Quote

Also would it not be better to have a relationships thread for relationships problems and advice?


Perhaps. Those seem to mainly fall into this thread (if sex-related) or the Inn's groove thread, but a specific relationship issues thread could potentially be useful/popular, too. No one has felt the need to create one so far, but feel free to give it a try (don't force unnecessary calamities into your relationship just for the sake of creating that thread though!).


How about a change to the thread title - something like "relationships and sex" and big bolded mod post here to serve as a reminder as to the nature of the thread?


If you make changes to the title it won't make people sing the song in their heads.
Screw you all, and have a nice day!

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#412 User is offline   Vengeance 

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Posted 05 February 2016 - 05:08 PM

View PostAndorion, on 05 February 2016 - 07:21 AM, said:

View PostD, on 05 February 2016 - 05:03 AM, said:

View PostAndorion, on 05 February 2016 - 04:41 AM, said:

Seems like a good time to ask, since this thread was started before I joined, what was the point of this thread? Sex in general as a concept and practice, sexual problems people maybe having, or there sex lives in general?


Well, looking at the front page or a random mid-page seems to consistently be on the topic of discussing relationship issues and problems related to the fallout from (or lead-up to) sexual encounters.

Quote

Also would it not be better to have a relationships thread for relationships problems and advice?


Perhaps. Those seem to mainly fall into this thread (if sex-related) or the Inn's groove thread, but a specific relationship issues thread could potentially be useful/popular, too. No one has felt the need to create one so far, but feel free to give it a try (don't force unnecessary calamities into your relationship just for the sake of creating that thread though!).


How about a change to the thread title - something like "relationships and sex" and big bolded mod post here to serve as a reminder as to the nature of the thread?


We don't go around changing titles for one incident. Titles get changed if they have spoilers (book threads) or if they are considered to be out of line. This is in the discussion forum. All of the mods monitor stuff in the discussion forums. The title seems fine to me. Also this conversation is starting to derail the thread if it continues I will go through and edit everything related to this out. So that the thread can continue in its prior state.


- V
How many fucking people do I have to hammer in order to get that across.
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#413 User is offline   amphibian 

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Posted 05 February 2016 - 06:29 PM

View PostAndorion, on 05 February 2016 - 07:02 AM, said:


This is confusing. If you just put "In a relationship" you will forever be fending off questions from curious people. I think she wanted you to do this as she saw it as an additional layer of security/validation, but its a rather silly idea really. And to hold on to that resentment long term makes no sense

You're South Asian like we are, so you know the hoops women have to jump through there in regards to hiding that they are dating before marriage. The precautions she took made sense for her and her family/friends (sort of).

It was a pain in the butt to be told I couldn't post on her wall, I couldn't like her status, or interact with her publicly on there - I abided by the rules because I loved her and it was able to be worked around.

But to have her try to tell me to cryptically disclose something I didn't want to disclose to those who weren't close to me was irksome.

I later understood the wanting of security and reassuring, but I eventually found out that I couldn't provide all of what she wanted. She broke up with me during a talk about buying an engagement ring. She spoke of loving me so completely that she'd throw away anything for me and how she felt I didn't do the same for her - or make her feel like that level of love was worth it. Didn't matter that I didn't (and still don't) agree with that assessment, it's what she felt and I learned from the time I had with her.
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#414 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 28 September 2017 - 06:43 AM

Hugh Hefner has died.

There was a time, not so long ago, that a young boy first got a look at the female form by sneaking his best friend's dad's stack of Playboys out into the tree house out back. And then begging his best friend if he could take a few home with him, trying to convince him that his dad would never notice. Oh if the millenials only new how much work it used to be, now everything is available at a click of a mouse button.
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#415 User is offline   Aptorian 

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Posted 28 September 2017 - 10:02 AM

Playboy was never really a thing here in Denmark. We had our own nudy mags and German 70s porn on late night tv.
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#416 User is offline   Tsundoku 

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Posted 28 September 2017 - 10:59 AM

View PostAlternative Goose, on 28 September 2017 - 10:02 AM, said:

Playboy was never really a thing here in Denmark. We had our own nudy mags and German 70s porn taught in lessons at school. Nude school.


Edited for accuracy.
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#417 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 28 September 2017 - 01:13 PM

View PostMalankazooie, on 28 September 2017 - 06:43 AM, said:

Hugh Hefner has died.



That funeral is going to be Legen. Dary.

I'm talking PPV.

18+ PPV.
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#418 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 28 September 2017 - 01:21 PM

View PostAbyss, on 28 September 2017 - 01:13 PM, said:

View PostMalankazooie, on 28 September 2017 - 06:43 AM, said:

Hugh Hefner has died.



That funeral is going to be Legen. Dary.

I'm talking PPV.

18+ PPV.

I'd pay for that. Better money spent and more entertaining then Mayweather vs. McGregor.

I know like a year ago or so, the Playboy mansion was put on the market with the condition that Hefner could continue living there. I wonder if his body will be sent to and taxidermist and then mounted somewhere on the mansion property? I think overlooking the grotto would be ideal as there is legend of what transpired there over the years.
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#419 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 28 September 2017 - 03:43 PM

View PostMalankazooie, on 28 September 2017 - 01:21 PM, said:

... I wonder if his body will be sent to and taxidermist and then mounted somewhere on the mansion property...


You have NO idea.
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#420 User is offline   QuickTidal 

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Posted 28 September 2017 - 03:59 PM

View PostAlternative Goose, on 28 September 2017 - 10:02 AM, said:

Playboy was never really a thing here in Denmark. We had our own nudy mags and German 70s porn on late night tv.


Which is better than what we had to do here, which was try to watch scrambled PPV porn channels in the hopes of seeing a boob or two.
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