The Just Plain Bad Movies Thread
#21
Posted 24 April 2011 - 05:03 PM
Hello, soldiers, look at your mage, now back to me, now back at your mage, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped being an unascended mortal and switched to Sole Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re in a warren with the High Mage your cadre mage could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an acorn with two gates to that realm you love. Look again, the acorn is now otataral. Anything is possible when your mage smells like Sole Spice and not a Bole brother. I’m on a quorl.
#22
Posted 25 April 2011 - 06:24 AM
Battle Plaptypus, on 24 April 2011 - 04:28 PM, said:
So lets see here, on the list of plain bad movies we should add:
The Godfather movies.
The Indiana Jones films
Star Wars
Heat
Things to do in Denver when you're dead.
Hamburger Hill
The Good the Bad and the Ugly
The first two terminator films.
Predator 1 and 2
The first three Alien films.
Blade Runner.
The Lethal Weapons films.
Blood Sport.
Big Trouble in little China
Just to name a few films that I like.
Are you saying all of these films are bad movies? Are you Illy? Is that what you are saying?
post-9377-127600481506.png
The Godfather movies.
The Indiana Jones films
Star Wars
Heat
Things to do in Denver when you're dead.
Hamburger Hill
The Good the Bad and the Ugly
The first two terminator films.
Predator 1 and 2
The first three Alien films.
Blade Runner.
The Lethal Weapons films.
Blood Sport.
Big Trouble in little China
Just to name a few films that I like.
Are you saying all of these films are bad movies? Are you Illy? Is that what you are saying?
post-9377-127600481506.png
We lost a lot of good movies in the Aptocalypse ...
This post has been edited by Sombra: 25 April 2011 - 06:28 AM
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes
"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys
"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys
"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
#23
Posted 25 April 2011 - 01:39 PM
The last movie i watched like that was The Box" with James Marsden and Cameron Diaz.
Just plain awful.
Just plain awful.
I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.
#24
Posted 25 April 2011 - 01:57 PM
#25
Posted 25 April 2011 - 02:32 PM
Predator 2 was an acceptable transfer from the jungle to city.
To me it sticks out as a good film because they took Danny Glover whom, besides Lethal Weapons, you don't really think of as an action hero, and pitted him against a great movie monster. It was suitably gory and spooky, even surpassing the first film in my opinion with the skinned drug dealers hanging from the ceilings or the attack in the sub way.
It also managed to expand upon the nature and technology of the first film by introducing new weapons for the Predator, showing that it only hunts dangerous/armed prey, Gives us a fight with a team actually equipped to fight it and it even showed us a fucking Alien skull in a trophy case.
Besides it has fucking Gary Busey in it from before he had a meltdown.
I remember us having this discussion before in that "Good sequels" thread from way back.
To me it sticks out as a good film because they took Danny Glover whom, besides Lethal Weapons, you don't really think of as an action hero, and pitted him against a great movie monster. It was suitably gory and spooky, even surpassing the first film in my opinion with the skinned drug dealers hanging from the ceilings or the attack in the sub way.
It also managed to expand upon the nature and technology of the first film by introducing new weapons for the Predator, showing that it only hunts dangerous/armed prey, Gives us a fight with a team actually equipped to fight it and it even showed us a fucking Alien skull in a trophy case.
Besides it has fucking Gary Busey in it from before he had a meltdown.
I remember us having this discussion before in that "Good sequels" thread from way back.
This post has been edited by Battle Plaptypus: 25 April 2011 - 02:33 PM
#26
Posted 25 April 2011 - 02:58 PM
Let's see...
- Pearl Harbor
- The Postman
- Any Alien film after the second.
- Daredevil
- The Black Dahlia
- GI Joe
- MacGruber
- Star Wars - The Phantom Menace (is there such a thing as retroactive child abuse? because I think George Lucas invents it with this film)
- Star Wars - A New Hope, Special Edition (nope, he invents it here - HAN SHOT FIRST!!!)
OK, I think I got it, but just in case, can you say the whole thing over again? I wasn't really listening.
#27
Posted 25 April 2011 - 03:37 PM
Battle Plaptypus, on 25 April 2011 - 02:32 PM, said:
Predator 2 was an acceptable transfer from the jungle to city.
To me it sticks out as a good film because they took Danny Glover whom, besides Lethal Weapons, you don't really think of as an action hero, and pitted him against a great movie monster. It was suitably gory and spooky, even surpassing the first film in my opinion with the skinned drug dealers hanging from the ceilings or the attack in the sub way.
It also managed to expand upon the nature and technology of the first film by introducing new weapons for the Predator, showing that it only hunts dangerous/armed prey, Gives us a fight with a team actually equipped to fight it and it even showed us a fucking Alien skull in a trophy case.
Besides it has fucking Gary Busey in it from before he had a meltdown.
I remember us having this discussion before in that "Good sequels" thread from way back.
To me it sticks out as a good film because they took Danny Glover whom, besides Lethal Weapons, you don't really think of as an action hero, and pitted him against a great movie monster. It was suitably gory and spooky, even surpassing the first film in my opinion with the skinned drug dealers hanging from the ceilings or the attack in the sub way.
It also managed to expand upon the nature and technology of the first film by introducing new weapons for the Predator, showing that it only hunts dangerous/armed prey, Gives us a fight with a team actually equipped to fight it and it even showed us a fucking Alien skull in a trophy case.
Besides it has fucking Gary Busey in it from before he had a meltdown.
I remember us having this discussion before in that "Good sequels" thread from way back.
Yeah there was a lot of cool stuff in it, especially the alien trophy, but I just don't think the movie was done that well overall. For me, it was disappointing compared to the original, which I thought was great. Still, it's better than AvP 1 and 2. I've not seen Predators.
McLovin, on 25 April 2011 - 02:58 PM, said:
Star Wars - The Phantom Menace (is there such a thing as retroactive child abuse? because I think George Lucas invents it with this film)
Star Wars - A New Hope, Special Edition (nope, he invents it here - HAN SHOT FIRST!!!)
Star Wars - A New Hope, Special Edition (nope, he invents it here - HAN SHOT FIRST!!!)
The Phantom Menace was a HUGE let-down. CGI lathered on that thick can't make up for a clumsy, pretty boring and often silly plot, dull and annoying characters, and stupid dialogue. Though Attack of the Clones trumped it in the shitty dialogue stakes with the most awful, wooden, awkward love scene ever. 'I don't like sand. It's coarse and rough and irritating and it gets everywhere. Not like here. Here everything is soft and smooth.' It's a wonder Luke and Leia were ever conceived.
I didn't mind the special editions of the original trilogy, granted that they weren't needed. Your point that Han shot first is one of the few things about them that pisses me off, well aside from the things kept from the original versions that pissed me off - such as fucking teddy bears saving the rebellion.
#28
Posted 25 April 2011 - 08:37 PM
McLovin, on 25 April 2011 - 02:58 PM, said:
Let's see...
- Pearl Harbor
- The Postman
- Any Alien film after the second.
- Daredevil
- The Black Dahlia
- GI Joe
- MacGruber
- Star Wars - The Phantom Menace (is there such a thing as retroactive child abuse? because I think George Lucas invents it with this film)
- Star Wars - A New Hope, Special Edition (nope, he invents it here - HAN SHOT FIRST!!!)
Oh yah, I just watched Daredevil for the first (and only) time, using Rifftrax. Even then, it was almost unbearable.
They came with white hands and left with red hands.
#31
Posted 02 May 2011 - 12:27 AM
I can never figure out what Jeremy Irons thought he was achieving with the ridiculous voice he put on for the D&D movie. Then again, it meshed well with the general horribleness of the film.
Found this on IMDB:
When asked by an interviewer about why he (Irons) accepted his role in Dungeons & Dragons (2000)) "Are you kidding? I'd just bought a castle, I had to pay for it somehow!"
Found this on IMDB:
When asked by an interviewer about why he (Irons) accepted his role in Dungeons & Dragons (2000)) "Are you kidding? I'd just bought a castle, I had to pay for it somehow!"
This post has been edited by Quickie Ben: 02 May 2011 - 12:27 AM
#32
Posted 02 May 2011 - 07:16 AM
No matter how much you hate the Prequels, they don't belong in this thread.
Skyline.
Star Trek's like 5 - 8, absent First Contact.
Clash of the New Titans.
Karate Kid 3 and New Karate Kid.
More to probably come.
Skyline.
Star Trek's like 5 - 8, absent First Contact.
Clash of the New Titans.
Karate Kid 3 and New Karate Kid.
More to probably come.
Trouble arrives when the opponents to such a system institute its extreme opposite, where individualism becomes godlike and sacrosanct, and no greater service to any other ideal (including community) is possible. In such a system rapacious greed thrives behind the guise of freedom, and the worst aspects of human nature come to the fore....
#33
Posted 02 May 2011 - 12:35 PM
Control Factor - everything about this movie was just plain bad, in a way that made me very, very sad and feel sorry for the actors. It had to be just about the worst directing and screenplay ever created. I didn't think it was possible.
It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.
#34
Posted 02 May 2011 - 02:25 PM
I find the amount of times Big Trouble in Little China has been mentioned disturbing, despite them being in jest and through requotes. What would Jack burton think...
A thread should be made for simply how good that film is.
A thread should be made for simply how good that film is.
#35
Posted 03 May 2011 - 11:42 AM
The Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans. Seriously not sure why I watched that all the way through...
A Haunting Poem
I Scream
You Scream
We all Scream
For I Scream.
I Scream
You Scream
We all Scream
For I Scream.
#36
Posted 16 May 2011 - 10:47 AM
BloodRayne
Undead
Welcome to the Jungle
The Reef
Teeth isn't that bad actually. Reminds me of a Clive Barker story... her vagina only bites dicks off when they belong to douchebag purity-club date rapists, old, gross men who pretend to be nice and give girls rides to places then demand sex to let the girls get out of the car, and bastard step-brothers who's too busy buttf"#¤ing some girl to save their mom, who is dying, in the very next room!
Also, Happy-Go-Lucky....Poppy must be the most annyoing movie character ever.
Undead
Welcome to the Jungle
The Reef
Teeth isn't that bad actually. Reminds me of a Clive Barker story... her vagina only bites dicks off when they belong to douchebag purity-club date rapists, old, gross men who pretend to be nice and give girls rides to places then demand sex to let the girls get out of the car, and bastard step-brothers who's too busy buttf"#¤ing some girl to save their mom, who is dying, in the very next room!
Also, Happy-Go-Lucky....Poppy must be the most annyoing movie character ever.
Things and stuffs...and other important objects.
#37
Posted 16 May 2011 - 10:51 AM
Teeth was fucking terrible... then again I'm probably biased b/c I watched it after going with a girl to her house and not having sex. Not to mention that as I grew sober in the morning hours I started to notice she's not hot at all anyway.
It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood, who strives valiantly; who errs and comes short again and again; because there is not effort without error and shortcomings; but who does actually strive to do the deed; who knows the great enthusiasm, the great devotion, who spends himself in a worthy cause, who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement and who at the worst, if he fails, at least he fails while daring greatly. So that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.
#38
Posted 16 May 2011 - 12:08 PM
#39
Posted 16 May 2011 - 01:39 PM
Quick Ben, on 16 May 2011 - 12:08 PM, said:
Lol yeah. My friend kept falling asleep while we watched it
![:(](https://forum.malazanempire.com/public/style_emoticons/Malazan/D.gif)
Also, Skyline and Daredevil are ATROCIOUS!
I would also like to add all the spoof movies titled Genre Movie after Date Movie, which was a little bit funny, to my list of movies that should be burned, along with the people who directed, wrote and produced it. KILL THEM ALL WITH FIRE!!
Things and stuffs...and other important objects.
#40
Posted 16 May 2011 - 03:48 PM
Happyfeatures Complimentkoala, on 16 May 2011 - 01:39 PM, said:
I would also like to add all the spoof movies titled Genre Movie after Date Movie, which was a little bit funny, to my list of movies that should be burned, along with the people who directed, wrote and produced it. KILL THEM ALL WITH FIRE!!
Ugh, Date Movie was horrible! Never watched any of the others (Epic Movie etc) after that! In fact I should have realised after watching Scary Movie 2, 3 & 4...
A Haunting Poem
I Scream
You Scream
We all Scream
For I Scream.
I Scream
You Scream
We all Scream
For I Scream.