[Assail]

Mappo's Travelling Sack, on May 24 2009, 02:58 AM, said:

Fluffy the Littlest Pony, on May 24 2009, 07:54 PM, said:

Mappo's Travelling Sack, on May 24 2009, 02:51 AM, said:

Fluffy the Littlest Pony, on May 24 2009, 07:49 PM, said:

Mappo's Travelling Sack, on May 24 2009, 02:47 AM, said:

This forum was my first too (sounds like I lost my virginity ), and is quite awesome. Hey, I don't think we're elitist, that's what others think (like Westeros and Hall of Worlds I think lol).

It's not rape if you secretly enjoy it, or so Twilight seems to be telling us.

Wow, we are wonderfully off-topic.

Lmao, seriously. Hmm, I feel like signing up on on those forums and just dropping some MalazanEmpire stuff and seeing what they say. I'm kind of curious.

Yeah, seriously. One of the Goodkind trolls brought it up a while ago, saying "you're all elitist snobs! It's not like this on Westeros!" or something like that. It was hilarious, naturally, and elicited much smugness among the members lol.

Lol I really want to encounter one of these Goodkind trolls myself. I can understand a love for Goodkind and his books, but if you act retarded and just come onto a forum to proclaim this and act stupid, then I hate you lol.


I might check it out when I'm bored some time.

You are different in that you actually provide (somewhat ) sane reasons for liking Goodkind, and that's why we tolerate your Tairyness. The others are all like "Richard iz da fucking awesomez", and generally hate on everyone who disagrees with them. It's funny for a while, then just gets annoying.

Lol I am truly hoping and looking forward to getting the chance to see one of these individuals. 

[MTS]

We haven't had one in a while, which is a good thing, I guess. Head over to the Goodkind forums (are there such? Never heard of 'em if so) and just hate on Goodkind, and the trolls will appear and tear your brainz to pieces with their nonsense

[Assail]

Mappo's Travelling Sack, on May 24 2009, 03:07 AM, said:

We haven't had one in a while, which is a good thing, I guess. Head over to the Goodkind forums (are there such? Never heard of 'em if so) and just hate on Goodkind, and the trolls will appear and tear your brainz to pieces with their nonsense

We should make this an adventure Mappo's! Then we screenshot ensuing hilarity. XD

[MTS]

That would be an epic adventure...I'm in!

On topic btw: My plan is apparently working. Roommate just txted progress report. "Resolve is crumbling."
:Patch:

[Assail]

Mappo's Travelling Sack, on May 24 2009, 03:12 AM, said:

That would be an epic adventure...I'm in!

On topic btw: My plan is apparently working. Roommate just txted progress report. "Resolve is crumbling."
:Patch:

I will locate said forums momentarily!


Nice, life is looking up for you.

This post has been edited by Imperial Historian: 24 May 2009 - 01:37 PM
Reason for edit: Mod Edit: no cross forum trolling

[Illuyankas]

1. Google will ruin your scheme. Also, don't be stupid.
2. The female equivalent of fap is schlick.
3. I'm all about the bulletpoints today. Not sure why.

[Darkwatch]

I suddenly had this idea of using the books she gave you to do practical things.
Like door stops.
Baby seat (and how could she complain, you're helping a toddler! )
Throwing it at squirrels.
Throwing it at people. (Why throw real books?)

[Imperial Historian]

Mod Hat: No trolling the goodkind forums and posting about it here. We don't condone that sort of thing.

[Aptorian]

[MTS]

Hah I forgot about this thread. Can't believe it's 20 pages long

[MTS]

Oh. My. God. This is insane.

The Twitard Attack Directory:
http://twilightsucks.proboards.com/index.c...amp;thread=5175

[bwgan]

I skimmed, hey it's not mafia so what are you going to do?

Illuyankas, on May 21 2009, 04:26 PM, said:

@Obdi: When in doubt, pick the most FABULOUS!

bwgan, on May 20 2009, 10:03 PM, said:

btw, if there should happen to be any straight, single, reasonably presentable, independently wealthy, male doctors on this forum, then drop me a line...

I have the first two, almost the third, not quite the fourth, definitely the fifth and for the sixth I have a badge that says 'Trust me, I'm a doctor', will that do?

Let me think about that...okay, I thought and the answer is NO.

Raymond Luxury Yacht, on May 22 2009, 08:55 PM, said:

I hate to say it, but this thread might have convinced me to read the books. It's been a while since I had a book or author to hate on the internets, and this might fit the bill. I want to join in the bashing, but am morally opposed to bashing a book I have never read. I fully expect it to be awful, but then I will be informed and therefore have the right to bash to my heart's content. I got through all but two of goodkind's books for the same reason.

Don't, just ...don't. I have to live with it...believe me RLY you really don't want to if you don't have to...trust me on this.

And on another note...what's all this talk about magma...what have volcanoes got to do with anything?

[Aptorian]

You know, we should resurrect Zanths book club idea, but instead of reading books we like, we'll choose books that we will most likely hate and then bash to pieces.

Twillight will be an awesome first topic of that book club.

[bwgan]

@Apt - for a millisecond I found myself going - haha, yes that would be fu....then I snapped out of it.

[MTS]

I treat the Twilight books I do have like crap, there's no need to compound the hate lol.

[caladanbrood]

This one makes me laugh...

Quote

Well, I get there, and I make my way to the Young Adult section only to come across a shrine to, yeah, you guessed it, Twilight. I stood there for a second and glared before shaking my head to continue to the Young Adult's section. A libraian lady behind me (scared the shit out of me- I didn't see her there) asked me, "You've read the book?" I sighed and nodded, "Unfortunatly." "I'm assuming you didn't like it?" "Not at all." The libriain nodded and I was like *OH GOD SOMEONE WHO AGREES. HOLYSHIT*.

I said bye and walked over to the shelves with some classic stuff on it, when this girl corners me. I didn't notice her (too busy reading 'The Last Unicorn' lulz) until a hardcover flies an inch short of my nose.

"What was that for?" I asked, looking up at her. "How can you NOT like Twilight? You must be an IDIOT!" I didn't know whether to laugh or to cry for the sake of this generation but I didn't have time for either when she threw another hardcover at me. I deflected it with 'The Last Unicorn' and finally noticed she was blocking my only exit and she had an unlimited amount of books to throw. (Basically we were inbetween two rows of books, a wall and she was blocking the entrance)

The only things I got out was "Do I KNOW you!?" and a various amount of curse words. She continued to toss books, a couple hitting me (Ow. Ow ow owwww.) ranting the entire time. All I remember is parts of what she said... something like... "Your an idiot with not taste in REAL literate! How DARE you offend Stephenie with your EXISTANCE! You don't understand Twilight's DEPTH that's why your and IDIOT! You'll never fall inlove and you'll be fat and lonely! Your a bitch with no chest and no one likes you! How can you NOT like Twilight!? You stupid whore! I hope you DIE!" (Yes, I'm pretty sure she was related to the deathly dark world.)

On the other hand I can't have respect for this person because they were reading a book with Unicorn in the title...

[MTS]

This is my favourite...

Quote

....okay. This was..creepy and epic at the same time. I would have been scared if this hadn't ended nicely(things with twilight fans usually end up nicely for me. But this time, it ended right in a different way.)

I practice fencing, you know, that thing with swords. I never really talked to anyone in my fencing class. But yesterday, I was reading Twilight before the class. Just to pass time, since I had gotten there almost one hour before the class. A guy asked me if I was reading twilight. I said yes. It went like this:

Fanboy: So, you are reading twilight?
Me: Yup.
Fanboy: My favorite character is Edward!
Me: ...cool.
Fanboy: ...What, you are on team Jacob?
Me: ...No I just..don't like the book.

After that, the fanboy had a very angry reaction. Because I went on to explain why I didn't like the books.
...the plotholes, the characters with no personality, you know the drill. He got angry and said "Well, why don't you write a better book then?" I said "I am. Wait until I'm done with it, so you can read it."

He got angry, and LITERALLY CHALLENGED ME TO A DUEL.
I was trying to keep a straight face, but it was hard. I ended up laughing hysterically.

"So, are you afraid?"
"....Nope."

And so, we had a duel. No one else was there, not even the teacher who is always late(and like I said, I was almost one hour early for the class).

.....And before the duel started, I had a brilliant idea. First of all, I'm ambidextrous. Which makes what I said to him kinda of a lie, but whatever. We started the duel, and to be honest he was winning. No one had gotten any points yet(..although I was slightly afraid that he was trying to kill me for real instead of getting points.) but he was winning. Then, I switched the sword to my right arm, and said:

"...I'm not left handed!"

and then proceeded to say "My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die."

He had a wtf look on his face, probably wondering if my name really was Inigo Montoya, and if he had killed my father, and said "....what the hell are you talking about?"

..I said "About good literature." and then, after the trash talk was over I proceeded to win the "duel".

.......it was the most hilarious thing I have ever seen in my life. A fanboy challenging me to a duel. With swords. Okay, we were in the same fencing class but..STILL! It was the most over the top fanboy challenge I have ever heard. And it was too good of a chance to pass a The Princess Bride reference.

....Now that I think about it though, I would have been screwed if he was better than me. We didn't have all protective gear on(neither one of us had the mask) so he could have hurt me. But let's forget the details, and my stupidity of not bothering to put the mask on before facing a rabid fanboy.

Because once we get past my stupidity we can laugh at a Twitard challenging someone who doesn't like the books to a duel. And that's hilarious.

[Darkwatch]

The fan attack directory is fun. But there's a reason they have a thread called "Bullshit detectors wanted".
Many stories are now in the BS section and I'm more than convinced that more than half of the stories aren't true. Since somewhere this would have been on the news or caught on video then youtube.
The only thing that makes me think it's real is that I've seen my friend's sister get chased by twitards, but nothing more.

[MTS]

Yeah, some I'm fairly skeptical of as well, like the attempted throat-slitting looks bogus and so do some of the stair-pushing ones. The one where 3 Twitards get a book-store worker's pay docked and those kinda stories sounds legit though.

[Darkwatch]

Oh some sound legit (the pay cut sounds real), but the sheer volume of attacks reported on that forum, you'd think that somewhere a journalist would have said "Shit this is A-grade stuff! Twilight is on a high note, this will get me exposure and will get the ratings!"

Some news agency (not necessarily the big ones) would have picked this up.
Some person with a camera phone would have caught it and posted it.

Because let's be honest, most of the twilight fans I know who would attempt to attack me would lose and it's pretty much the same for most of us.