[Gorefest]

Fox News with another gem: http://www.theguardi...lim-city-claims

According to one of their 'terrorist experts': "In Britain, it's not just no-go zones, there are actual cities like Birmingham that are totally Muslim where non-Muslims just simply don't go in. And, parts of London, there are actually Muslim religious police that actually beat and actually wound seriously anyone who doesn't dress according to religious Muslim attire."

Don't know whether to laugh or to cry. To think that this is considered a genuine news channel gives me nightmares. Do they get their information from The Onion or something like that?

This post has been edited by Gorefest: 12 January 2015 - 02:35 PM

[Tsundoku]

For me it would be a combination of dark chocolate and a new book.

--------------------------------------

http://www.news.com....d-1227183453099

Chinese man in a coma was woken up by the smell of money
7 HOURS AGO JANUARY 13, 2015 3:51PM

MONEY is a powerful thing.
A Chinese man, who was in a coma for more than a year, suddenly woke up when nurses waved some cash under his nose.
One sniff of a 100 yuan bill — worth $19AUD — was all it took to bring back Shenzhen resident Xiao Li as he lay unconscious in his hospital bed, Central European News reports.

“It was extraordinary,” said chief medic Dr. Liu Tang. “I've never seen anything like it in 20 years as a doctor.”
Doctors couldn't find anything else that would wake the man until they tried the money. P

Li fell into his coma in August 2013 after spending nearly a week at an internet cafe without sleep. He passed out as he was researching business ideas, according to CEN.
For months doctors searched for a way to awaken Li, but to no avail. It wasn't until his family revealed what he loved most in the world that they found their key to success.
“We had asked his family what really drove him, and they were very clear that it was money,” Tang said. “When we learned about his fondness for money, we experimented with notes and change.
“Memories of smell and sound can be very powerful stimulants,” he added. “We found that a crisp, new 100 yuan note crumpled under his nose worked best.”
While Li’s family continues to hope for the best as he continues his therapy, doctors urged them to remain cautious.
“He still has some way to go before he is discharged,” Tang explained. “But he is making good progress.”

[Tsundoku]

" ... Tywin Lannister, did in the end, shit gold ..."

---------------------------------------

http://www.news.com....0-1227190419564

Scientists at Arizona State University say there is a goldmine in sewage waste
11 HOURS AGO JANUARY 20, 2015 10:13AM

IT is the most unlikely of places to strike a fortune but scientists say they have found gold in sewage. Yes, gold. In sewage.
Scientists at Arizona State University say there could be as much as $13 million worth of metals in the sludge produced by a city of one million people each year, including $2.6 million in gold and silver.
Science Mag reported metals have long been known to exist in sewage but what the good folks at ASU have done is quantify its value.
Sewage mixes toilet water with effluent from industrial manufacturing, storm run-off and anything else flushed down the drain.
The scientists took sludge samples from around America and measured the metal content with interesting results.
Lead author Paul Westerhoff said extracting the metals could prove worthwhile and that one city in Japan is already doing so. The people of Suwa in Nagano Prefecture reportedly collect two kilograms of gold from every metric tonne of ash left after burning sludge.
Yale University engineer Jordan Peccia told Science Mag there is literally a gold mine running underneath big US cities.
“We’re not going to get rid of this sewage sludge,” Peccia said. “We need to make this push where we stop thinking about it as a liability and instead we think about it as a resource. And anything we can find in sewage sludge that’s valuable, it’s good.”
The researchers next plan to determine whether extracting metals is cost-effective or technically-viable.
“We think it is,” Westeroff said.

----------------------------------------------

Now we ponder: what country is the most full-of-shit, per capita?

This post has been edited by Sombra: 20 January 2015 - 10:30 AM

[Maark Abbott]

Gorefest, on 12 January 2015 - 02:35 PM, said:

Fox News with another gem: http://www.theguardi...lim-city-claims

According to one of their 'terrorist experts': "In Britain, it's not just no-go zones, there are actual cities like Birmingham that are totally Muslim where non-Muslims just simply don't go in. And, parts of London, there are actually Muslim religious police that actually beat and actually wound seriously anyone who doesn't dress according to religious Muslim attire."

Don't know whether to laugh or to cry. To think that this is considered a genuine news channel gives me nightmares. Do they get their information from The Onion or something like that?

The response that guy got was amazing. Rule of thumb: don't post stupid things about Britain which hold no grounding in fact, because we will mercilessly hound you for it (if it's based in fact we'd shrug and agree).

The one about Mecca bingo was especially grand.

[Tsundoku]

"Inter-species masturbation". Yep.

-----------------------------------------

http://www.news.com....o-1227193823997

Most virile bull in the world produced 2.4m doses of semen during his stellar career
32 MINUTES AGO JANUARY 22, 2015 10:54PM

The world record for dairy bull semen production is held by the now-deceased US Holstein bull Jenny-Lou Mrshl Toystory. He had 2.4 million "doses" of semen collected from him and has an estimated 500,000 daughters worldwide.
TOYSTORY was a hulking 1200kg black and white beast with an ornery temperament and more than 500,000 kids.
The Holstein bull died in December, followed by a touching burial.
Toystory - or Jenny-Lou Mrshl Toystory-ET to his friends - was one of 70 siblings from his own mother Toyane.
The virile and prolific beast left behind more than 500,000 daughters in 50 countries.
And one of those sold for $300,000.
His world was one of inter-species masturbation and artificial insemination.
Through that process, he produced 2.4 million doses of semen, or enough to inseminate 2.4 million cows. He produced more than 1 litre of the stuff in his nine years plying his trade from 2005 ro 2014.

The mother of Toystory, and all-round great cow, Jenny-Lou Patron Toyane. She could never have dreamed her son would be such a successful man-whore.

With up to 12 billion sperm per collection, it meant for a lot of little swimmy things.
Genex Cooperative purchased the bull for $4000 at six months of age and a dose of his semen sold for upwards of $60.
The company has remaned the building he was housed in the “Toystory Campus” and vice president of production for the company, Glen Gilbert spoke glowing of the beefy love machine.
“The old adage was as long as he was interested in sex, he wasn’t interested in you,” he told the Wall Street Journal.
“But if he lost that other interest, you had to be careful.” said
“He was very fertile also and he enjoyed his work,” according to the Fench Post website.
“He had very good libido. He would come to our collection arena very eager.
“He was very athletic.”

The promotional poster produced to celebrate the two millionth dose of Toystory semen. Oh how we cheered.

Among all bulls in the world, no matter the race, colour or creed, he is the semen king.
There have been less than 50 sires in the exclusive “millionaire’s club” - as it is known in the industry - and Toystory smashed the record of previous bovine sperm donor king Skalsummer Sunnyboy, who produced 1.7 doses in the 1990s.
Toystory has been written up in the august non-bull-related journals of record The Times of London and the Wall Street Journal as well as the UK’s Daily Mail.
And he has his own Wikipedia entry - but it is only in German, of course.
As well as ornery - the WSJ reported one veterinarian as saying he was “meaner than a snake” - Toystory was a little horny.

Mystic Valley dairy in Wisconsin is where the super virile Toystory was born. It is sure to become a pilgrimage destination for bull semen enthusiasts.

He was “collected” up to nine times a week which was double the average for his stable mates.
Mitch Breunig from Mystic Valley Dairy at Sauk City in Wisconsin bred Toystory and named the bull after his daughter’s favourite movie.
‘’For most farms that sell bulls it is right up there,’’ he said, ‘’Having so many people purchase this bull for their herds is humbling.
“People have come from all around the world to see our farm.
“I can go around the world and say Toystory and you have instant credibility with people. It is cool.
‘’It was the first bull our family every sold to AI so that is remarkable. We will never match this feat.
“I was pretty sad (when he died).”

Dutch Holstein bull Skalsumer Sunny Boy was the semen king until Toystory blew him out of the water.

While Genex says Toystory had become a household name within the dairy industry regular people probably don’t put too much thought into bulls and their prodigious semen production.
What generally happens is the bull is lead into the collection area where a ‘’teaser’’ animal is tied or held in a secure ‘crush’.
As bulls don’t have the same socialisation as humans, homosexuality is encouraged and the teaser animal is usually a male.
A male is used so as to cancel out the chance of that valuable semen being accidentally “lost”.
Then as the bull ‘’mounts’’ the teaser, a man who perhaps has one of the bizarrest jobs in the world slips a fake vagina on his schlong to capture the moment of passion.
According to a paper by the Food and Agriculture Organization of the United Nations associate
professional officer H. Schuh the average sperm production of a bull ranges between 3.6 and 12 x 12 billion sperm per ejaculation.
Toystory

When the semen is frozen - which most semen used by dairy farmers is - about 20 million total sperm per ‘’dose’’ are required.
That means about 180 to 600 doses of frozen semen per ejaculate.
It is then shipped around the world.
But what does one do when a bull becomes a world record producer of sperm?
‘’Hats and T-shirts were made to celebrate Toystory’s feats,’’ Genex said.
“In addition celebration activities were held to thank the employees who care for Toystory daily as well as those who process and distribute Toystory genetics. Yes, a few commemorative semen straws were printed.”

[Gorefest]

Nope. It's not masturbation unless the bull itself was frantically rubbing its genitals while watching videos of 'Cow and chicken'.

[QuickTidal]

@Sombra: So the first printing company I ever worked at doing page layout and graphic design (late 90's) used to have a really big customer who would bring in a catalog once a year to be printed. The people who set the files up never did them correctly so they always required colour correction, bleed adjustments, page shifting, and other preflight issues. Then they would go through at least 3 or four full rounds of type changes. It was for a bull semen company, and each text passage below each picture sang the praises of that (pictured) bulls specific semen. It was like a sperm donor list done up like a magazine for cow prostitutes.

The clincher?

The book was 120pages. Every. Year.

[Tsundoku]

I still prefer the term "poonami".

----------------------------------------------

http://www.news.com....b-1227194495311

Canadian photographer captures rare whale defence mechanism involving a lot of poo
21 HOURS AGO JANUARY 23, 2015 2:05PM

Brown surprise ... A diver attempts to swim away after the massive whale sets off a rare defence mechanism.
A GROUP of divers received an unexpected surprise when they were suddenly engulfed by a giant underwater poo cloud.
Created by a rather inconsiderate sperm whale, the revolting images show the unlucky bunch being completely submerged by a heavy brown mist.
Described as a “poonado” by Canadian photographer, Keri Wilk, 30, the peculiar behaviour is thought to have been evidence of a rarely seen defence mechanism.
Seen in waters off the small Island of Dominica, the marine mammal managed to create a whirlwind of excrement by spinning on its side and flapping its tail.
The hilarious, if not revolting moment occurred when the four free divers began to take pictures of the aquatic mammal as part of a government approved expedition to photograph the whales.
But the routine dive soon took a turn for the strange when the whale began releasing wave upon wave of faecal matter right in front of their eyes.
Although it isn’t uncommon to see whales defecate before they descend, this was a bowel movement with a difference, spanning over 30 metres in diameter.
To make matters worse, Keri prefers to dive with just goggles and a snorkel as bubbles from scuba diving equipment tend disturb the whales.

Keri said: “Four of us got into the water near the whale, then it slowly approached us, stopped, and pointed itself straight down before storm began.
“At first, it seemed like a regular bowel movement but rather than continuing its dive down, it remained at the surface and continued to defecate for a startling length of time.
“Four of us looked at each other with confusion, then back at the whale, expecting that any second its call from nature would come to an end.
“Instead, the whale bobbed up and down, spun in circles and waved the poo in every direction for several minutes while we just sat back and watched.
“The water was crystal clear, initially, and was the most idyllic Caribbean blue water that you could imagine.
“After a few waves of faeces were released and stirred vigorously by the whale, the water was like chocolate milk, I couldn’t see my hand when I held it in front of my face.
“I had poop in my eyes, mouth, wetsuit, everywhere and I was soaked in it from head to toe.
“But, after leaving the cloud, it quickly washed away, and didn’t leave a smell on us.
“I did take an extra long shower once I returned to shore later that day, just in case.
“I’ve never heard of it happening before, and I don’t know anyone that has had this happen, it very well could be the first time that it has been photographically documented.”

[Tsundoku]

These people are - to put it mildly - stark, raving fucking bonkers.

------------------------------

http://www.news.com....8-1227196299028

Ultra-marathons: What drives people do to the world’s toughest events
7 HOURS AGO JANUARY 25, 2015 2:34PM

YOU’VE got no toenails. It’s the middle of the night. You’re surviving on McDonald’s and No Doz and you’ve got to just. Keep. Going.
Welcome to the world of ultra running — an extreme sport that regards regular marathons as a jog around the block, where competitors put themselves through gruelling races that can last from 48 hours to six days, designed to push your body to the absolute limit.
“You’re always hurting,” said president of Australia’s Ultra Runners Association, Robert Boyce.
“Some of the good runners will be in pain for hours upon hours but they just block it out. That’s what makes a good ultra marathon runner.”
Mr Boyce has completed more than 100 ultra-marathons since taking up running 13 years ago, aged 40, including two of the world’s most iconic; the Western States and Marathon des Sables in the Sahara desert.

The general manager of a vegetation management company said the sport has exploded in popularity with the number of events and competitors doubling in Australia in the last five years.
“People are looking for a little bit more than just the marathon, even though marathons are going through the roof, once you’ve done a marathon, it’s like ‘what’s next?’”
“You want to test yourself, it’s a personal thing about ‘where’s my limit? How fast can I go?’ Once upon a time 100 miles (160km) used to be the ultimate race, now they want 200 miles (320km). Once you conquer one you go to the next.”
Now 53, Mr Boyce said he averages seven minutes per kilometre and does 100 mile runs in 24 hours, compared to elite athletes who might run five minutes per kilometre. He said nothing compares to the feeling of having run overnight through mosquitos and leeches to finish the race.
“You’re always hurting, it’s never like ‘this is a walk in the park’. You’re fatigued midway through and you battle on ... but it’s exhilarating, your body adapts because of the challenge.”

During the event runners will slather their feet in vaseline to prevent blisters, tape their nipples to stop chafe and guzzle caffeine for a last quarter advantage.
Mr Boyce also said “most ultrarunners don’t have any toenails” and competitors need to eat every 20-30 minutes to maintain their energy levels.
“Running a marathon is easy, gels will give you the carbohydrates.
“When you’re out there for 24 hours plus, you’ve got to put so many calories in.
“Everyone is different [but] ordering a pizza at a stop is common. We’ve done that, sit there in a race and you get your crew to order pizza or get them to order McDonald’s … you don’t want the burger but you want their chips, the salty chips.”
“I’m a salty pumpkin soup fan, that’s my favourite to get me through. That and Coke and chocolate in the last quarter.“
And forget blisters, the toughest battle by far is sleep deprivation.
“The hours between 2am to 5am are the hours the body wants to shut down. [That’s when you have] the No Doz, the loud music and the cups of coffee,” he said.

After the race, complete mental and physical exhaustion means runners need to completely stop training for at least two weeks.
Despite the intensity, Mr Boyce said the sport has an amazing sense of camaraderie that kept people coming back.
“It’s part of the race rules if someone is down you stay with them and when the next person comes you go and you will be given back your time,” he said.
“You can be in a race where the best in Australia are telling you how to run better …. You get friends for life.
“There’s no other sport that friendly — it’s because of the time you spend together.”
Inspired? Take a look at some of the most extreme events around the world below.

MARATHON DES SABLES
This 250 kilometre ultra-marathon through Morocco’s Sahara desert is one of the most iconic in the world where runners are dropped in, laden with supplies including food and cooking gear, and left to fend for themselves.
If the heat doesn’t get you the dust storms will, and one year organisers were forced to undergo “low pressure cleansing” of their eyeballs at the rest stops.
A long file of competitors take the start of the 24th Marathon des Sables in the Sahara desert, on March 30, 2009 climbing t...

Chris Moon, who lost one leg and an arm clearing landmines in Mozambique, took part in th
Chris Moon, who lost one leg and an arm clearing landmines in Mozambique, took part in the event to raise money for the Red Cross. Picture: Narelle Autio. Source: News Corp Australia
Runners are advised to eat 4000 calories a day and bring clothes for both extreme heat and cold desert nights, with no lotion to grease up the body, as this, mixed with sand will make for an unpleasant week of chafe.
Three people have died during the event, but Mr Boyce said the length of time given means it’s actually possible for a fit person with the right mindset to complete.
“The conditions are hard but the race is not hard. The average fit person can probably walk it …. You don’t have to be an elite athlete to do it,” he said.
BADWATER 135
The revered Badwater 135 mile (217 kilometre) race held in Furnace Creek, California starts in searing July heat in Death Valley and covers three mountain ranges with nearly 4000 metres of vertical ascent and 1400 metres of descent, to finish at Mt Whitney.
It’s an invitational race with a course limit of 48 hours and a record time of 22 hours 51 minutes held by Brazilian Valmir Nunes for the men and 26 hours 16 minutes by American Jamie Donaldson for the women.

SPARTATHLON
This historic 246 kilometre race retraces the steps of Athenian runner Pheidippides, who was sent to Sparta to ask for help before the battle of Marathon.
Legend has it he ran the route in 36 hours one night — something a British RAF Commander and three friends put to the test and achieved, which became the start of the modern-day event.
In 1983 the first annual Spartathlon was held and the mythical status and difficulty of the race mean it’s internationally sought after.
The invitation-only run covers olive groves, steep hillsides and rolling hills and takes runners up a mountain in the dead of night.

WESTERN STATES 100 MILE
This iconic run follows a historic trail from California’s Squaw Valley to Auburn across gold fields, rivers and mountains. It began in 1974 and is staffed by around 1500 volunteers with those that finish in less than 30 hours getting a covered bronze belt buckle.
Runners are warned to carry flashlights and “watch out for horsemen” on the official website. Entry is via a qualifying time and a ballot.

ANTARCTIC 100K
If running in heat doesn’t take your fancy the Antarctic 100 kilometre run is the only one held on the icy continent, where participants run four loops over the Union Glacier.
Training is made difficult by the fact the flights and date are subject to change due to weather. Runners have to wear at least three layers of clothing including one to absorb sweat, one to warm them and one to protect themlseves from wind, plus a face mask, goggles, hat and gloves.

This year’s run was taken out by Ireland’s Keith Whyte in 9 hours 26 minutes, just two months after he won another race in the searing Doha desert and all while recovering from injury.
“It’s challenges like this that I love. Testing your bodies limits in an extreme unforgiving environment and hopefully coming out on top,” he wrote on his blog
ANTARCTIC MARATHON

JUNGLE MARATHON
This race held in the Brazilian Amazon has everything from dangerous animals to extreme humidity, river crossings, brutal climbs and sandy beaches. It covers 127 kilometres in six stages in heat that can reach 40 degrees.
While training for the distance is possible, little prepares competitors for the humidity with some even opting to put a treadmill in the sauna or run in a glasshouse in the lead up to the event.

[Tsundoku]

What.
The.

FUCK?

-------------------------------------------------

http://www.news.com....v-1227210597707

Mum, grandmother, aunt and friend kidnap and abuse six-year-old boy to teach stranger danger
20 HOURS AGO FEBRUARY 06, 2015 2:13PM

MAKING a child understand stranger danger is unfortunately a lesson all parents need to instil in their young.
But kidnapping your six-year-old son at gunpoint, holding him captive in his family’s basement and telling him he would be sold into sex slavery is not how to care for a child.
Lincoln County Sheriff’s Office allege that sometime before February 2, 38-year-old Denise Kroutil approached a co-worker, Nathan Firoved, 23, and asked him to kidnap her nephew to “scare” him, Fox2Now reported.
The boy’s mother, 25-year-old Elizabeth Hupp of Troy, Missouri, and grandmother, Rose Brewer, 58, agreed that the young child needed to be taught of a lesson and backed his aunt’s plan.

On Monday (February 2), Firoved allegedly parked his pick-up truck by the boy’s bus stop and waited for him to be dropped off after school in Troy. Firoved lured the six-year-old into his truck and drove off.
In the truck, Firoved told the boy he would never “see his mommy again,” and he would be “nailed to the wall of a shed,” police told St Louis Post-Dispatch.
When the boy burst into tears, Firoved pulled out a handgun and told the boy to stop crying or he would hurt him, the Sheriff’s office allege.
Firoved drove the boy around the city and because he would not stop crying, the accused allegedly bound the boy’s hands and feet with plastic bags and covered his face with an adult-sized jacket so he couldn’t see..
Firoved drove the boy to his own home, carried him into the basement, and left him there.
Kroutil, the boy’s aunt, walked down into the basement, pulled the victim’s pants down, and began shouting that he could be sold into sex slavery. She also allegedly chastised the child for not trying to resist her or Firoved.
The boy was kept in the basement for some time longer before he was finally unbound and allowed to go upstairs, at which time his family lectured him about stranger danger.
Family members and Firoved kept in contact via cell phone during the whole four-hour ordeal.

The six-year-old boy told school authorities what happened on Wednesday, who then contacted the Missouri Division of Family Services. The sheriff’s office was called to the home and the child placed into protective custody.
The family members told investigators their intent was to educate the child and felt they had done nothing wrong.
Firoved, Brewer, and Kroutil were charged with kidnapping, felonious restraint, and abuse/neglect of a child. They remain in custody at Lincoln County Jail on a $250,000 bond. The boy’s mother, Hupp, was charged with kidnapping and abuse/neglect of a child. She remains jailed on a $250,000 cash-only bond.

This post has been edited by Sombra: 06 February 2015 - 10:57 PM

[Gust Hubb]

Wonder what skinny person poop does...

__________________

http://www.bbc.com/n...health-31168511

A woman has dramatically gained weight after a stool transplant from her daughter, doctors report.

It is a genuine medical procedure to transplant healthy bacteria into a diseased gut, but US doctors think it may have affected her waistline.

She quickly gained 36lb (16kg) and is now classed as obese, the case report in Open Forum Infectious Diseases says.

A UK expert said the link between gut bugs and obesity was still unclear.

A faecal microbiota transplant - also referred to by some as a "transpoosion" - is like an extreme version of a probiotic yogurt.

The aim is to introduce good bacteria into the gut and it was officially backed by the UK health service last year.

New treatment It is used when people have stubborn Clostridium difficile infection in their bowels.

It causes vomiting, diarrhoea and abdominal pain and cannot always be treated with antibiotics.

The human body is teeming with thousands of species of microbes that affect health. The 32-year old woman, who has not been indentified, had an infection that could not be treated with even the most powerful antibiotics.

Dr Colleen Kelly, from the Medical School at Brown University, said the option of a faecal transplant was discussed and the woman wanted to use a relative - her daughter.

The daughter was overweight at the time and was in the process of becoming obese.

The procedure did clear the infection.

But Dr Kelly told the BBC News website: "She came back about a year later and complained of tremendous weight gain.

"She felt like a switch flipped in her body, to this day she continues to have problems."

She started with a Body Mass Index of 26. Sixteen months after the procedure she had a BMI of 33 and three years after it, a BMI of 34.5.

Caution Previous research has shown that transplanting gut bacteria from obese people into mice led to the animals gaining weight.

Dr Kelly said limited conclusions can be drawn from a single patient, but called the case a warning as "there's not a lot on safety evidence out there".

Dr Kelly has now changed her practices and "as a result I'm very careful with all our donors don't use obese people".

Dr Andreas Karatzas, from Reading University, said: "You have to bear in mind that this person was saved.

"If you run the risk of losing a patient, you don't bother about what could happen 20 years later."

However, he said the evidence that gut bacteria affected human waistlines was still inconclusive.

He added: "There is some evidence in animals, but we have to be careful, it is a different organism, just because it happens in animals doesn't mean it happens in humans as well."

[Tsundoku]

I'm not normally fan of politicians, but I am a fan of honesty and brevity.

----------------------------------------------------

http://www.news.com....2-1227240280656

Anthony Albanese releases bizarre one word media statement on Max Moore-Wilton retiring
7 HOURS AGO FEBRUARY 26, 2015 6:02PM

LABOR’S Anthony Albanese has issued what might be the shortest and funniest press statement ever released by an Australian politician.
Upon hearing that the chairman of the Sydney Airport Corporation Max Moore-Wilton was retiring, the Member for Graydler released a one-word statement, simply saying: “Good”.

The statement drew comment from former NSW Premier and Sky News host Kristina Keneally who, made her own feelings about Mr Moore-Wilton plain.

Mr Albanese and Mr Moore-Wilton have had an ongoing bitter feud about the future of a second Sydney Airport.
In 2013, Mr Albanese used parliamentary privilege to accuse Mr Moore-Wilton of seeking to protect a financial benefit for his company by opposing a second airport, The Daily Telegraph reported.
Mr Albanese, who backed a second Sydney airport, also raised questions about Mr Moore-Wilton’s past as the country’s top bureaucrat under the Howard government, which sold Sydney Airport only months before Mr Moore-Wilton resigned to run it.
Mr Moore-Wilton has previously threatened legal action against Mr Albanese and criticised the Labor MP, saying he was a “grub” and a “factional hack”.

Attached File(s)

•  albanese.jpg (31.56K)
  Number of downloads: 0

[worry]

One of the all time best headlines:
http://www.usatoday....ebees/24403053/

[Tsundoku]

A bit salty ... ?

---------------------------------------------

http://www.news.com....4-1227272510122

Call for sexual assault law change after Pat Maahs’ co-worker gets off from court for getting off in coffee
1 HOUR AGO MARCH 21, 2015 1:09PM

HOW’S this for the co-worker from hell ...
A woman in Minnesota wants her co-worker charged with a sex crime after she caught him doing something so very, very wrong to her coffee.
But she’ll have to get the law changed first.
Pat Maahs, who worked in a hardware store for 26 years, told media she caught a co-worker standing near her desk, close to her coffee with a strange look on his face last August, fox8.com reported.
“He looked over his shoulder, and the deer-in-the-headlights look and promptly left the room,” she said.
“And when he left the room, I looked down at the desk and here was a puddle on the desk.”
Then it hit her.
Her co-worker had ejaculated in her coffee.
ejaculated in her coffee.
ejaculated in her coffee.

Even worse — he may have been doing it for six months. She said she thought it had been tasting funny.
“Generally, I make a cup and take it in a travel cup on my way to work. I finish that cup up about 10:30am, maybe have one more cup during the day,” she told CBS Minnesota.
“It is a sexual assault. I was sexually assaulted.
“It was something very serious that had happened to me and I thought there’s no repercussion for him,” she said.
The co-worker confessed to the crime and was subsequently charged on two counts of criminal sexual conduct.
But a judge dismissed the charges, because “no current sex law covered this type of incident.” Crime Feed reported.
Instead, the judge suggested Maahs lobby to have the law changed.
So she is.

Her representative Debra Hilstrom has kicked off the push to have the law changed in the US.
“This just says if you put your bodily fluids in someone else’s food, that counts for criminal sexual conduct as well,” Hilstrom said.
If the proposed bill passes, Maah’s dirty co-worker would have committed a felony and be forced to register as a sex offender.
“This isn’t just protecting me because someone was attracted to me. It’s protecting everyone in society in general,” Maahs said.
Since being dismissed on the original charges, the co-worker was charged with indecent exposure.
Cold comfort for Maahs, who will undergo testing for sexually transmitted diseases for the next year. She is also seeing a psychologist.

----------------------------------------------

Sure puts Van Wilder in a whole new light.

This post has been edited by Sombra: 21 March 2015 - 03:04 AM

[Tsundoku]

A double-shot.

Now this is a noble use of airspace.

-------------------------------------------

http://www.news.com....o-1227263523304

Enterprising pilot uses GPS technology to realise humanity’s dream of drawing enormous sky penis
6 DAYS AGO MARCH 15, 2015 4:05PM

A genius pilot has taken advantage of modern technology to draw an enormous penis in the sky.
The crudely-drawn cock and balls appeared on the online service Flightradar24, which tracks airplane flight paths.
What the unknown Florida pilot’s ballsy effort lacks in anatomical accuracy it more than makes up for in scale, taking up more than 30km of airspace.

This is not the first time people have used GPS tracking to create crude, penis-related imagery.
A San Francisco copywriter has a tumblr dedicated to unusually-shaped running routes.

However, this latest effort is possibly the most ambitious and large-scale crude cock and balls drawing ever attempted.
We salute you, flight N829BM.

[Maark Abbott]

Sombra, on 21 March 2015 - 04:54 AM, said:

A double-shot.

Now this is a noble use of airspace.

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http://www.news.com....o-1227263523304

Enterprising pilot uses GPS technology to realise humanity's dream of drawing enormous sky penis
6 DAYS AGO MARCH 15, 2015 4:05PM

A genius pilot has taken advantage of modern technology to draw an enormous penis in the sky.
The crudely-drawn cock and balls appeared on the online service Flightradar24, which tracks airplane flight paths.
What the unknown Florida pilot's ballsy effort lacks in anatomical accuracy it more than makes up for in scale, taking up more than 30km of airspace.

This is not the first time people have used GPS tracking to create crude, penis-related imagery.
A San Francisco copywriter has a tumblr dedicated to unusually-shaped running routes.

However, this latest effort is possibly the most ambitious and large-scale crude cock and balls drawing ever attempted.
We salute you, flight N829BM.

That... is... AMAZING.

[Tsundoku]

<insert load-bearing joke>

Please follow the link to see the floorplan.

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http://www.news.com....a-1227280941597

A modernist phallic masterpiece with very suggestive floorplan is up for grabs
1 DAY AGO MARCH 27, 2015 12:56PM
What an eyeful! The floor plan of 111 McCarrs Creek Road Church Point.

IT is not the size of the house that counts, but what you do with it.
This cheeky floorplan is in fact a Modernist house by acclaimed architect Stan Symonds. The elongated design and series of circles was the last word in futuristic design back in 1958. From the air this very private property, well, looks like privates property.
Penis house is carved on stone outside this Pittwater property.

It is no Buckingham Phallus, it only has four bedrooms, but some of the rooms are large, and round. Big enough for a ballroom perhaps.
At the tip of the elongated house is a huge circular room.

Agent Phil Vanstone, of LJ Hooker Mona Vale, said the Church Point owners loved the house, and joked about its design. Today’s potential buyers however are a bit taken aback when faced with the floorplan.
Plenty of scope for fantasies in this bedroom in the round.

“Most of the time the husbands get it immediately,” he said.
“You can see the wives nudging them, telling them to shut up.”
One of the many circular rooms in McCarrs Creek Rd, Church Point. Meatballs anyone?

The locals are not so subtle. Some wag has carved into the stone at the front of the McCarrs Creek Rd home, ‘penis house’.
The question is? Willy sell it?
Mr Vanstone said he has already had offers but may still take the eye-popping design to auction in early April. More than $1.1 million in expected.

[Tsundoku]

Wow.

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http://www.news.com....i-1227306975294

New Japanese game show attracts some stiff competition
24 MINUTES AGO APRIL 16, 2015 9:13PM

JAPANESE television shows are known for being out there — but this karaoke game show comes with some stiff competition and a twist.

The show, Sing What Happened, involves contestants singing a song without becoming distracted by a woman beside them — who is giving them a handjob.
To win, the contestant must finish the song without ... finishing. Do you get our drift?

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Well, I guess it's just a more honest version of all the renovation/talent/cooking shoows that are befouling our screens these days. They're all wankers too.

[worry]

NSFW for cartoon wieners: http://geekologie.co...spraypaints.php

[Maark Abbott]

Not weird as much as a sad commentary on society as a whole, but holy shit are all the news channels going butterfuck crazy over this new royal kid. Who honestly cares this much?

The news channel on the TV at work has literally had nothing but a camera pointing at the door of a hospital in case these glorified council tenants come out for about four hours now. Madness. And not the baggy trousered sort, either.