Malazan Empire: Terry Goodkind **Spoilers** - Malazan Empire

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Terry Goodkind **Spoilers** A discussion topic that will never die

#241 User is offline   Skywalker 

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Posted 01 April 2009 - 08:11 AM

I need to hear more about Betty the Goat. Please? Pretty please? Pretty please with Bill the Pony on top?

Skywalker - feels something as monumental as the evil chicken hiding behind a spoiler veil
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#242 User is offline   Darkwatch 

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Posted 06 April 2009 - 06:46 PM

I wonder how bad a collaborative work would be if written by both Stephenie Meyers and Terry Badkind.
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Cursed Summer returns. The Lady Now Sleeps.

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#243 User is offline   Aptorian 

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Posted 06 April 2009 - 06:48 PM

Throw in KJAnderson and Trudi Canavan and we might be able to break down the fabric of reality with that vortex of poo...
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#244 User is offline   Darkwatch 

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Posted 06 April 2009 - 07:00 PM

No idea who Canavan is.

But I can imagine the rest.
Daylight Sparkling Mord Sith.
Intense staring by the Confessors.
Rob using his Truth Sword while fighting robots.
Bene Gesserit using not just the Voice but the Raptor Gaze.
Rob using Truth Sword to c-section Kalahn.
The Pub is Always Open

Proud supporter of the Wolves of Winter. Glory be to her Majesty, The Lady Snow.
Cursed Summer returns. The Lady Now Sleeps.

The Sexy Thatch Burning Physicist

Τον Πρωτος Αληθη Δεσποτην της Οικιας Αυτος

RodeoRanch said:

You're a rock.
A non-touching itself rock.
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#245 User is offline   Grimjust Bearegular 

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Posted 07 April 2009 - 01:23 PM

View PostDarkwatch, on Apr 6 2009, 07:00 PM, said:

No idea who Canavan is.

But I can imagine the rest.
Daylight Sparkling Mord Sith.
Intense staring by the Confessors.
Rob using his Truth Sword while fighting robots.
Bene Gesserit using not just the Voice but the Raptor Gaze.
Rob using Truth Sword to c-section Kalahn.



OMG, LOL!

Have imagirep!


Btw, you forgot the pouting and whining..
Things and stuffs...and other important objects.
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#246 User is offline   Optimus Prime 

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Posted 07 April 2009 - 07:00 PM

I went to the Badkind wikipedia page and discovered the "epic" ending to a "triumphant" series.

It didn't end like I'd thought, Ricky being raped by Zedd (who suspiciously had a pony tail in the final scene).

:unworthy:
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#247 User is offline   Aptorian 

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Posted 07 April 2009 - 07:04 PM

Ricky? Raped by Zedd? Tell me more!
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#248 User is offline   Optimus Prime 

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Posted 08 April 2009 - 07:38 AM

It would've put that much needed "badkind" touch to the last scene of his "epic" masterpiece. After the many female rapes, his mancrush character Ricky Rahl is punished by his mentor, Zedd.

The beautiful "bromance" ends on a high note!
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#249 User is offline   bwgan 

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Posted 08 April 2009 - 06:05 PM

View PostSkywalker, on Apr 1 2009, 09:11 AM, said:

I need to hear more about Betty the Goat. Please? Pretty please? Pretty please with Bill the Pony on top?

Skywalker - feels something as monumental as the evil chicken hiding behind a spoiler veil



I am sorry. Such knowledge is forbidden to the uninitiated. You lack the moral celery and might even be a lemming of discord.

(OMG I hate that this is all coming back to me with such vividness...it seems like only yesterday...and yet so much has happened. [I [i]need[/i] a wise old smiley to insert here. If one is found then I claim the name!])
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#250 User is offline   Zhuangzi 

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Posted 09 April 2009 - 06:01 PM

EVIL CHICKEN!!

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#251 User is offline   Werthead 

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Posted 10 April 2009 - 12:22 AM

View PostOptimus Prime, on Apr 8 2009, 08:38 AM, said:

It would've put that much needed "badkind" touch to the last scene of his "epic" masterpiece. After the many female rapes, his mancrush character Ricky Rahl is punished by his mentor, Zedd.

The beautiful "bromance" ends on a high note!


This imagery makes me want to vomit and never stop :p
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#252 User is offline   Slum 

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Posted 10 April 2009 - 12:45 AM

Xander and his Goodkind fanfic.........
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#253 User is offline   Jumpy 

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Posted 10 April 2009 - 03:06 PM

It is a shame that Goodkind has fallen so far. I loved Wizard's First Rule. And Even the Stone of Tears. Then there was Blood of the Fold. Weak. Temple of the Winds? Good. Soul of the Fire. AWFUL. Goodness, after Soul of the Fire there was only one book worth my money, and that was Faith of the Fallen.

SoT was the first Fantasy I ever read -- oh, back in '94? I have them sitting on my bookshelf, with like an inch of dust accumulating over them.

Next was The Belgariad, swiftly followed by the Mallorean. David Eddings ftw.
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#254 User is offline   Assail 

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Posted 13 April 2009 - 03:43 AM

View PostZhuangzi, on Apr 9 2009, 11:01 AM, said:

EVIL CHICKEN!!


Go on, keep mocking it, you know it would fuck your world up. Hahaha
I still heart Goodkind.
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#255 User is offline   Optimus Prime 

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Posted 13 April 2009 - 06:06 AM

yes...if by "fuck your world up" you mean make me want to rip my eyeballs out.
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#256 User is offline   Skywalker 

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Posted 13 April 2009 - 10:44 AM

View Postbwgan, on Apr 8 2009, 11:35 PM, said:

View PostSkywalker, on Apr 1 2009, 09:11 AM, said:

I need to hear more about Betty the Goat. Please? Pretty please? Pretty please with Bill the Pony on top?

Skywalker - feels something as monumental as the evil chicken hiding behind a spoiler veil



I am sorry. Such knowledge is forbidden to the uninitiated. You lack the moral celery and might even be a lemming of discord.

(OMG I hate that this is all coming back to me with such vividness...it seems like only yesterday...and yet so much has happened. [I [i]need[/i] a wise old smiley to insert here. If one is found then I claim the name!])


You force me sir, to perform arcane rituals involving a doll, an HDMI cable, and a catheter. Oh, and whatever Hannibal used to saw open Ray Liotta's head.
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#257 User is offline   Astra 

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Posted 13 April 2009 - 12:47 PM

View PostAssail, on Apr 13 2009, 03:43 AM, said:

View PostZhuangzi, on Apr 9 2009, 11:01 AM, said:

EVIL CHICKEN!!


Go on, keep mocking it, you know it would fuck your world up. Hahaha


You have a very distinct "hahaha"...I gotta google to find out more about you.
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#258 User is offline   Assail 

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Posted 13 April 2009 - 03:38 PM

View PostAstra, on Apr 13 2009, 05:47 AM, said:

View PostAssail, on Apr 13 2009, 03:43 AM, said:

View PostZhuangzi, on Apr 9 2009, 11:01 AM, said:

EVIL CHICKEN!!


Go on, keep mocking it, you know it would fuck your world up. Hahaha


You have a very distinct "hahaha"...I gotta google to find out more about you.


Be afraid, be very afraid.

For I am omnipotent and vengeful!
I still heart Goodkind.
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#259 User is offline   Myshkin 

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Posted 14 April 2009 - 06:03 AM

View PostSkywalker, on Apr 1 2009, 12:11 AM, said:

I need to hear more about Betty the Goat. Please? Pretty please? Pretty please with Bill the Pony on top?

Betty is an extremely noble creature, who miraculously managed to follow Dick's little sis all the way from somewhere to somewhere else. She's also really, really funny and capable of making all the guys laugh. Also, I believe she was once tricked by an evil sorcerer to do something, but Dick forgave her.
Lemming of Discord
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#260 User is offline   Assail 

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Posted 14 April 2009 - 06:47 AM

View PostMyshkin, on Apr 13 2009, 11:03 PM, said:

View PostSkywalker, on Apr 1 2009, 12:11 AM, said:

I need to hear more about Betty the Goat. Please? Pretty please? Pretty please with Bill the Pony on top?

Betty is an extremely noble creature, who miraculously managed to follow Dick's little sis all the way from somewhere to somewhere else. She's also really, really funny and capable of making all the guys laugh. Also, I believe she was once tricked by an evil sorcerer to do something, but Dick forgave her.


For your impudence you will be punished. It's coming, I'm just gathering names right now.
I still heart Goodkind.
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