Malazan Empire: What's messing with your groove? - Malazan Empire

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What's messing with your groove?

#30001 User is offline   Tsundoku 

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Posted 13 September 2023 - 01:04 PM

The floods in Libya. Fuuuuuuuuuuuck. :(
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

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#30002 User is offline   QuickTidal 

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Posted 13 September 2023 - 01:14 PM

In most of the climate change documentaries of the 2000's and 2010's they would show the climate-thrown carnage of our possible future if we did nothing....those scenes of weather carnage just seem to be "the news" now.

Fuck the climate deniers for letting it get this bad in service to capitalism.
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#30003 User is offline   worry 

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Posted 13 September 2023 - 01:16 PM

Yeah, absolute nightmare.
They came with white hands and left with red hands.
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#30004 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 13 September 2023 - 01:34 PM

View PostQuickTidal, on 13 September 2023 - 01:14 PM, said:

...
Fuck the climate deniers for letting it get this bad in service to capitalism.


The worse part... to me... it's not just the deniers.

We know the deniers won't do anything, that part is obvious. Profit will always outweigh social responsibility until it ceases to be profitable.
But the massive middle category of people who believe in climate change but have decided it's someone else's problem and the inconvenience of driving a smaller car, supporting less polluting options, and just reducing their imprint generally... that's the frustrating part. They know it, but they won't add their actions and voices to the attempt to correct it.
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#30005 User is offline   worry 

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Posted 13 September 2023 - 01:47 PM

The jury's still out.
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#30006 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 13 September 2023 - 02:49 PM

View Postworry, on 13 September 2023 - 01:47 PM, said:

The jury's still out.


Of time.

We'll see whether new effective technological solutions come about and actually get implemented, but reversing what we've already done would be extremely difficult. Maybe quantum computing and future AI will provide some hope (as acclaimed physicist and science writer Michio Kaku argues in his new book).

Of course there's still some time to keep it from getting a lot worse, or from even worse cascade failures leading to climate change so extreme that scientists consider it practically impossible for us to stop or reverse. (Maybe we could just blow up the Earth and make another one?... Don't mention that to Elon Musk though, he already has enough terrible ideas.)

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 13 September 2023 - 02:49 PM

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#30007 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 14 September 2023 - 12:04 AM

Quote

Earth is outside its 'safe operating space for humanity' on most key measurements, study says

[...] "We are in very bad shape," [...] "We show in this analysis that the planet is losing resilience and the patient is sick."

[...] The fact that ozone layer is the sole improving factor shows that when the world and its leaders decide to recognize and act on a problem, it can be fixed and "for the most part there are things that we know how to do" to improve the remaining problems [...]

"I've often said if we don't quickly cut back on how we are stressing the Earth, we're toast, [...] This paper says it's more likely that we're burnt toast."

Earth is outside its 'safe operating space for humanity' on most key measurements, study says (msn.com)


Ecce fabam...

So raise our glasses to the sun to burn,
And start to dig more mountain hobbit-holes
Well-reinforced against the floods of floods...

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 14 September 2023 - 12:05 AM

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#30008 User is offline   Puck 

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Posted 17 September 2023 - 09:44 AM

So, how does one find new friends at 34 when one has found that what one thought of as friends aren't?

It's fine, people change (or not, that being the issue here). But it's depressing.
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#30009 User is offline   amphibian 

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Posted 17 September 2023 - 07:58 PM

View PostPuck, on 17 September 2023 - 09:44 AM, said:

So, how does one find new friends at 34 when one has found that what one thought of as friends aren't?

It's fine, people change (or not, that being the issue here). But it's depressing.

If you have hobbies or professional related pursuits that bring you outside to be around people doing the same thing, go do them and talk to people. If that's not something you've done or are doing, sign up for co-ed sports teams and talk to people there.
I survived the Permian and all I got was this t-shirt.
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#30010 User is offline   amphibian 

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Posted 17 September 2023 - 11:00 PM

I left out a whole part about how it stinks to have to make that distance with ex friends. Be well, stick to hope that you'll be alright and thriving, and taking care of yourself here is the right move.

I'm sorry.
I survived the Permian and all I got was this t-shirt.
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#30011 User is offline   Tsundoku 

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Posted 18 September 2023 - 07:48 AM

View PostPuck, on 17 September 2023 - 09:44 AM, said:

So, how does one find new friends at 34 when one has found that what one thought of as friends aren't?

It's fine, people change (or not, that being the issue here). But it's depressing.


Sounds like a bit of a story if you care to share.
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#30012 User is offline   Maark Abbott 

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Posted 18 September 2023 - 11:50 AM

Weather stressing me out. We're getting the tail end of Lee over the next couple days. Mostly dissipated but rain and wind ain't my friends.
Debut novel 'Incarnate' now available on Kindle
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#30013 User is offline   Puck 

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Posted 18 September 2023 - 10:45 PM

View Postamphibian, on 17 September 2023 - 07:58 PM, said:

View PostPuck, on 17 September 2023 - 09:44 AM, said:

So, how does one find new friends at 34 when one has found that what one thought of as friends aren't?It's fine, people change (or not, that being the issue here). But it's depressing.
If you have hobbies or professional related pursuits that bring you outside to be around people doing the same thing, go do them and talk to people. If that's not something you've done or are doing, sign up for co-ed sports teams and talk to people there.


Thank you, amph, you always have level headed advice and I appreciate you for that!

I'm not into sports that include other but I should probably look into some other activities. I will definitely be going to shows again as soon as I can (I'm dealing with a somewhat fresh still heel spur atm, fun times). I'm fortunately to have amazing colleagues which helps with getting some social interaction and not despairing completely but we do not share interests. At the very least I know through them I am not completely socially inept and am fun to be around. Helps my self-esteem.


View Postamphibian, on 17 September 2023 - 11:00 PM, said:

I left out a whole part about how it stinks to have to make that distance with ex friends. Be well, stick to hope that you'll be alright and thriving, and taking care of yourself here is the right move. I'm sorry.


It does. The worst part is that I am likely to lose my best friend through distancing myself from these other people. I've mentally worked through everyone else, if that makes sense. I'm alright with people drifting away/apart, I've never actively cut ties with people, though. I acknowledge that I will be fine and probably better off in the end. IT just hurts in the moment. Thank you again for your kind words.

Also going on a cruise in two weeks. Lots of time to read and relax.


View PostTsundoku, on 18 September 2023 - 07:48 AM, said:

View PostPuck, on 17 September 2023 - 09:44 AM, said:

So, how does one find new friends at 34 when one has found that what one thought of as friends aren't?It's fine, people change (or not, that being the issue here). But it's depressing.
Sounds like a bit of a story if you care to share.


Not sure anyone actually wants to read that but if you insist, here's a rambly summary. It was a good way to write own all the thoughts I have on this matter:

Spoiler


I need normal people in my life. People who are willing to communicate. People whom I can see in person more than twice a year. I don't care about anyone's taste in music, I'll come along to your favourite band as long as we can enjoy the moment. People whom I can have a freaking conversation with. I do not feel like myself with those people anymore. I still have my issues and bad character traits but I have grown in the past years and most of these people have not. That's really all there is to it.

If not for the damned Dungeons & Dragons, I'd just go no contact. Nobody would notice, anyway.

This post has been edited by Puck: 18 September 2023 - 10:49 PM

Puck was not birthed, she was cleaved from a lava flow and shaped by a fierce god's hands. - [worry]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
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#30014 User is offline   Tiste Simeon 

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Posted 19 September 2023 - 11:32 AM

Puck, you only need us on the Malazan Empire forums. Everyone else is just extraneous ;)
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#30015 User is offline   Slow Ben 

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Posted 19 September 2023 - 02:17 PM

 Tiste Simeon, on 19 September 2023 - 11:32 AM, said:

Puck, you only need us on the Malazan Empire forums. Everyone else is just extraneous ;)


Your wife and children will be thrilled.

It’s true though.
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#30016 User is offline   amphibian 

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Posted 19 September 2023 - 03:20 PM

 Puck, on 18 September 2023 - 10:45 PM, said:

It does. The worst part is that I am likely to lose my best friend through distancing myself from these other people. I've mentally worked through everyone else, if that makes sense. I'm alright with people drifting away/apart, I've never actively cut ties with people, though. I acknowledge that I will be fine and probably better off in the end. IT just hurts in the moment. Thank you again for your kind words.

Also going on a cruise in two weeks. Lots of time to read and relax.


 Tsundoku, on 18 September 2023 - 07:48 AM, said:

 Puck, on 17 September 2023 - 09:44 AM, said:

So, how does one find new friends at 34 when one has found that what one thought of as friends aren't?It's fine, people change (or not, that being the issue here). But it's depressing.
Sounds like a bit of a story if you care to share.


Not sure anyone actually wants to read that but if you insist, here's a rambly summary. It was a good way to write own all the thoughts I have on this matter:

Spoiler


I need normal people in my life. People who are willing to communicate. People whom I can see in person more than twice a year. I don't care about anyone's taste in music, I'll come along to your favourite band as long as we can enjoy the moment. People whom I can have a freaking conversation with. I do not feel like myself with those people anymore. I still have my issues and bad character traits but I have grown in the past years and most of these people have not. That's really all there is to it.

If not for the damned Dungeons & Dragons, I'd just go no contact. Nobody would notice, anyway.

I'm going to say a couple things and then back off because ultimately this is your situation to navigate:

Not having a D&D game is a much better situation than having a bad D&D game with bad people over and over.

Finding a new D&D game could be a journey, but the odds of it being better than what you've been going through lately are pretty good - even if it's just medium quality.

I'd jump ship and leave this group behind - because they are treating you like crap over and over. They are not taking actions that connect directly to repair of the hurt you took from the character damage and the lack of conflict resolution. There's been multiple chances for that and they keep missing them.
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#30017 User is offline   Lady Bliss 

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Posted 19 September 2023 - 11:27 PM

Try a larp group. You make friends and a lot of them will be into DnD
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#30018 User is offline   Maark Abbott 

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Posted 20 September 2023 - 07:55 AM

Lee is here. Weather like this always makes me antsy, even though the Pennines took the majority of it for us yesterday and today is only meant to be a few hours' worth of real shite. Propanolol and earplugs lessgo
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#30019 User is offline   Slow Ben 

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Posted 20 September 2023 - 03:17 PM

 amphibian, on 19 September 2023 - 03:20 PM, said:



Not having a D&D game is a much better situation than having a bad D&D game with bad people over and over.




100%
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#30020 User is offline   TheRetiredBridgeburner 

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Posted 22 September 2023 - 10:52 AM

View PostSlow Ben, on 20 September 2023 - 03:17 PM, said:

View Postamphibian, on 19 September 2023 - 03:20 PM, said:

Not having a D&D game is a much better situation than having a bad D&D game with bad people over and over.



100%


Agreed. I left a group after realising it's not worth poisoning your joy in the hobby by putting up with things just for the sake of having a game - but it took me a long time after repeated incidents. I recognise some of the behaviours you mention - no open discussion, ostracising people when they raise an issue (however carefully and politely). It's not fun and not worth your overall peace of mind - particularly when this is supposed to be a close friend of yours.

it took me well over a year to feel like finding a new game again, but the new game is positive and has much better boundaries - I was lucky though, it could have taken a few tries to find the right fit. Do you have something like Meetup.com or similar over there? I've always found that useful as a starting point for finding similar interest groups for hobbies.

This post has been edited by TheRetiredBridgeburner: 22 September 2023 - 11:02 AM

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