[Slow Ben]

My 3 year old daughter just woke up from her nap, walked up to me on the couch and said "Daddy, i decided when i'm grown up i want to be a Ninja". I said OK, she nodded and sat down to watch Peppa Pig.

[QuickTidal]

Today I found out that Olivia Coleman's dog is called Alfred Lord Waggyson.

What an utterly delightful name.

[Mezla PigDog]

There's a trampoline park in a gym near where I live. On Monday mornings they do toddler sessions where only under-5s and their carers are allowed in and you have the run of the place. There are usually only about 10 kids and 5 or 6 grownups when we go so we basically have a massive bouncy sports hall to play in together. I love trampolining.

[Aptorian]

Is there an ambulance there to ferry all the quadriplegic kids to the ER?

(I'm scared of Trampolines)

[QuickTidal]

Mezla PigDog, on 28 January 2019 - 05:14 PM, said:

There's a trampoline park in a gym near where I live. On Monday mornings they do toddler sessions where only under-5s and their carers are allowed in and you have the run of the place. There are usually only about 10 kids and 5 or 6 grownups when we go so we basically have a massive bouncy sports hall to play in together. I love trampolining.

We have one of these near us as well and we've taken our daughter to it often, and she giggles the entire time having an absolute blast with the other kids!

Such a great outing for little ones.

[Illuyankas]

Make sure they actually have a decent insurance form cause there are a lot of snapped necks and broken backs from those parks when they're cheaply and poorly run

Which is to say, most of them

[Mezla PigDog]

Alright health and safety police! My kid can't jump more than 10cm off the ground even with a trampoline helping him. If he gains the momentum to snap anything it will be pretty amazing. And the good thing about these sessions is that you don't even get close to anyone else because it's so big and empty we can just play nicely together which doesn't often happen with a 2 year old because they're belligerent psychopaths. This is why it's such good fun to go.

[Illuyankas]

I'm irrationally mad at two year olds because the one at my niece's sixth birthday emotionally blackmailed me into taking my dinosaur costume off early because they were completely bricking it

On the plus side, dressing up as a dinosaur was amazing and I would absolutely do it again

[Malankazooie]

The 'trampoline parks' that I'm familiar with are padded bouncy floors, so it's unlikely a child would get hurt unless they cracked heads with another kid jumping too close.

This is why we can't have nice things in this uber safety, over protective culture we have now. Shit, when I was near that age (a little older mind you), I whisky throttled my cousin's minibike into the side of his family's barn. I was tossed over the handle bars and bounced off the side of the barn, shook my head and dusted myself off. My cousin was pissed and more worried about the damage to his minibike.

[amphibian]

My partner lost both front teeth (as a 17 year old) to a friend's knee while both were on a trampoline.

I've also dealt with a few people at work (law job) who had trampoline accidents.

I won't nag Mezla, but I'm staying away from full crowds on trampolines. Too dang dangerous for the amount of fun involved.

[Mezla PigDog]

Jesus Christ can I not just say I've had a nice day with my kid and get a pat on the head? Joyless bastards.

I'll have you know we've been about 5 times now and the closest anyone has come to an accident was when I jumped too high and discovered my pelvic floor muscles really aren't all that anymore.

[Dadding]

A friend of my parents' was paralyzed on a trampoline, she was a professional trampolinist. So I wasn't allowed on them for the longest time. The first time I went on one I broke my index finger. Then the next time I drove my teeth through my bottom lip into my knee. Knee needed stitches.

Worth it, it was pretty fun.

[Slow Ben]

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Number of downloads: 0

[Slow Ben]

We've taken ours as well Mez and they made it out alive. And they enjoyed the hell out of it.

[Malankazooie]

Is it true that if your home and/or health insurance providers catch wind that you have a trampoline in your back yard you'll pay beaucoup dollars out the ass in insurance premiums?

When I was a kid, me and my brother used to ride our bikes to a friend's house that had a jenky AF above ground trampoline, one of those with no mesh fencing around it that would prevent you from being thrown off. On top of that, it had exposed springs (rusty) that would pinch you if you just so happened to have exposed skin that was touching the springs as it reset the potential energy for the next bounce. And to add insult to injury, it was in an open dirt field with a shit ton of chewed on dog bones laying around it - their dogs used the trampoline as shade in the summer and would chew on bones underneath the trampoline out of the oppressive summer heat and leave them laying there when done chewing on them. I can't tell you how many times we were pinched by those springs and thrown off that trampoline when when one of those perfectly timed 'super bounces' were initiated to toss us haphazardly onto that craggy bone ground. We would keep going until our friend's mother would call us in for lunch. A few dabs with a cotton ball of rubbing alcohol and a couple of band-aids later and we were ready for more after lunch.

#TBT #10YearChallenge

[amphibian]

In the US, yeah, you'll pay extra for a trampoline in most states (50-100) and if there is a bad accident and the company didn't know about one, it can trigger cancellation or non coverage in some situations.

I was not kidding about my partner losing teeth. She brings it up fairly often because the fake teeth thing occasionally bugs her in day to day life.

[Tsundoku]

Malankazooie, on 29 January 2019 - 12:22 AM, said:

When I was a kid, me and my brother used to ride our bikes to a friend's house that had a jenky AF above ground trampoline, one of those with no mesh fencing around it that would prevent you from being thrown off. On top of that, it had exposed springs (rusty) that would pinch you if you just so happened to have exposed skin that was touching the springs as it reset the potential energy for the next bounce. And to add insult to injury, it was in an open dirt field with a shit ton of chewed on dog bones laying around it - their dogs used the trampoline as shade in the summer and would chew on bones underneath the trampoline out of the oppressive summer heat and leave them laying there when done chewing on them. I can't tell you how many times we were pinched by those springs and thrown off that trampoline when when one of those perfectly timed 'super bounces' were initiated to toss us haphazardly onto that craggy bone ground. We would keep going until our friend's mother would call us in for lunch. A few dabs with a cotton ball of rubbing alcohol and a couple of band-aids later and we were ready for more after lunch.

Ahhh ... memories.

[Gnaw]

Oh, fuck me. In a "gawd this is funny in a fucked up sort of way".

I chose the handle Gnaw because 1) I like any dog more than most humans and 2) Bent was already taken.

3 years ago I decided maybe a trip to rehab was in order. My 28 day program lasted 162 days, so they agreed that I had a problem. A couple of months after that, my counselor said, "Mark, we need to talk about your eating. Or, rather, your lack thereof." Turns out under all the drug and alcohol abuse was this little Anorexia issue. First they had to convince me that males could get eating disorders then had to convince me of several other behaviors that proved their point. That took several more months.

Anyways, 22 months later, it just occurred to me the irony of calling myself "Gnaw".

[amphibian]

Gnaw, on 29 January 2019 - 11:42 PM, said:

Oh, fuck me. In a "gawd this is funny in a fucked up sort of way".

I chose the handle Gnaw because 1) I like any dog more than most humans and 2) Bent was already taken.

3 years ago I decided maybe a trip to rehab was in order. My 28 day program lasted 162 days, so they agreed that I had a problem. A couple of months after that, my counselor said, "Mark, we need to talk about your eating. Or, rather, your lack thereof." Turns out under all the drug and alcohol abuse was this little Anorexia issue. First they had to convince me that males could get eating disorders then had to convince me of several other behaviors that proved their point. That took several more months.

Anyways, 22 months later, it just occurred to me the irony of calling myself "Gnaw".

I'm really happy that you're facing your problems and slowly winning those battles. Congrats and I know what kind of work you're putting in to get better. Thank you for sharing.

[Raymond Luxury Yacht]

My wife is testifying in front of Congress next week. That’s pretty cool.