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DnD is on my Bucket list I have no idea how to play

#41 User is offline   Maark Abbott 

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Posted 22 August 2018 - 07:31 AM

View PostMaark Abbott, on 21 August 2018 - 06:59 AM, said:

View PostCause, on 20 August 2018 - 12:15 PM, said:

View PostMaark Abbott, on 20 August 2018 - 11:58 AM, said:

Playing Tuesday. Got an absolute shit of a boss for the party.

They'll probably die but that's fine as this still progresses the story (they're in a Monastery overseen by dicks who will res them if the boss kills them and say "that was entertaining lul").

I've given the boss a berserk mechanic. Ostensibly it's a rogue with 16AC, 400hp (our party has a ludicrous damage output). At 75, 50 and 25 percent HP respectively, the boss gains an extra multiattack, damage dice and 1 point of AC. Starts off with 2d6 slashing +1d6 radiant on damage dice and has two multiattacks.

IF they beat this boss they'll get some really cool stuff to go with it, including a sword that allows them to perform a blink attack. Chances are they'll die pretty fast though, ehehehehe.


Yikes at 100 hp he will be doing 5 attacks of 6d6 + 1d6 radiant with AC of 20? What level is this party?


Level 5. The purpose behind it is "to obtain knowledge you must first know death" so it's kind of designed to be unwinnable. If they die, they'll be rezzed by the troll asshole Seers and can progress, but if they somehow beat the boss (and this party's damage output is stupid high), they'll get rewarded handsomely. I may even level them up if they beat the boss tonight (if they don't they'll ding on killing the Remorhaz as we use milestones for levels).


Christ this party's damage output is fucking stupid. This boss, in the first round of combat, took 100 damage rounded up, so I've had to give them a base level of damage resistance. Even that won't be enough to actually challenge the party, so I'm also taking an elective decision to bring some adds in (weaker than the boss but still strong enough to do some damage), have the Seers interfere (giving the boss some healing and whatnot) and give the boss some legendary actions.

DMing for a high DPS group is hard as balls man.
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#42 User is offline   Maark Abbott 

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Posted 23 August 2018 - 12:51 PM

OK, so I have a solution to the party's insane DPS.

Basically:

At 75% HP the boss will still gain a level of berserk - however it'll also be healed, spawn four adds (let's call them Black, Green, White and Orange) and gain +2 AC.

Oh, and why don't we give Purple some legendary actions too? Fuck yeah. Legendary resistance. Attacks on other creature's turns. Dark Souls lessafuckingo
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#43 User is offline   TheRetiredBridgeburner 

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Posted 24 August 2018 - 10:39 AM

I want to know how that plays out!
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#44 User is offline   Imperial Historian 

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Posted 24 August 2018 - 10:45 AM

I'm currently looking forward to dming a one shot for the group I normally play with. Our party ended up mind controlling some cows to use as a cavalry against a horde of undead resulting in many dead cows. There was one survivor who due to a wild magic roll is now super intelligent. DMing a one shot of the cow out for revenge. The party have no idea what's coming.
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#45 User is offline   Maark Abbott 

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Posted 24 August 2018 - 11:57 AM

View PostTheRetiredBridgeburner, on 24 August 2018 - 10:39 AM, said:

I want to know how that plays out!


They will know the true power of a CPU! AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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#46 User is offline   TheRetiredBridgeburner 

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Posted 13 September 2018 - 06:05 AM

Haha, I think our party is presenting a similar problem for our DM as Maark's do for him. We killed the mid-arc boss on first encounter.

The campaign book does allow for it as a possibility, so it's not supposed to be impossible, but it's supposed to be highly unlikely. Whoops Posted Image I've never seen a DM so happy at a departure off-script though. I get the impression it gives him much more scope to build with.
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#47 User is offline   Maark Abbott 

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Posted 13 September 2018 - 07:51 AM

It's really tricky because my party understands mechanics such as Hold Person. But then they say "legendary resistance is bullshit!" when I make a fight actually challenging for them. Yeesh.

Incidentally. DM opinions please. Our one sorcerer used a lightning spell on one of my boss constructs that means the target can't take reactions until the end of their next turn - but the boss was immune to lightning. I had to effectively say categorically "these creatures are immune to lightning" to explain why the spell had no effect.

Now, immunities to spells conferring immunity to the effects that accompany them - is that how it's meant to work? Doesn't make sense for a creature to be unaffected by the damage element of the spell but then take a status debuff from the same spell...
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#48 User is offline   Cause 

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Posted 14 September 2018 - 06:47 AM

I'd agree with your interpretation and ultimately it's your decision. Especially if you need the boss to be strong.

As you say though, if being shocked by a bolt of lightning does no damage its also unlikely to cause whatever shocks, twitching or what have you that creates the stun that's supposed to make him unable to react
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#49 User is offline   Maark Abbott 

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Posted 14 September 2018 - 07:31 AM

View PostCause, on 14 September 2018 - 06:47 AM, said:

I'd agree with your interpretation and ultimately it's your decision. Especially if you need the boss to be strong.

As you say though, if being shocked by a bolt of lightning does no damage its also unlikely to cause whatever shocks, twitching or what have you that creates the stun that's supposed to make him unable to react


The balancing point was that whilst the boss was immune to electrical damage (lightning), and took half damage from most attacks, it was fully weak to force damage.

Hell, with this party and the upcoming Remorhaz, I've had to simultaneously drop its damage down (because 6d12 or whatever will one-shot party members) but at the same time massively buff its base HP. Absolutely silly.
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#50 User is offline   Puck 

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Posted 16 December 2018 - 07:24 PM

I thought you guys might enjoy this... Some selected quotes from our last two sessions:


Spellsword: Did someone steal all your furniture?
Cleric: That's the beginning of an incredibly shallow joke I do not want to hear.

GM: I'd like to point out that MY frost giants are noticeably faster than certain white walkers. When the winter is supposed to be coming, then it WILL fucking come.

Warmage: ...is what I say. In Draconic, of course.
GM: Alright. Is there anyone present who does NOT speak Draconic? Probably Spellsword again?
Spellsword: Excuse me.

Mage: I hope the king can accept that the mercenaries we hired are all undead.
Cleric: ALL of them?! How do you expect me to explain that to the king?
Mage: Just tell him Moradin is cool with it.
Cleric: No, YOU go and explain that. - I turn around and leave.
GM: Talk to the hand, the face doesn't listen.

Drizzt: Are you allied with the Thay-Necromancers now as well?
Mage: Not yet, but...
Drizzt: NOT YET?!

Mage: I once met a very charming lich lady...
Drizzt: What is it with your party and all those undead?
Warmage: You could say they're friends for life.
GM: Drizzt turns away and leaves. Fuck this.

Dwarven king: You cannot possibly suggest that the undead..
Mage: ...Are useful against frost giants? Well, yes!

GM: The drow-slash-dracolich is waiting for you already, standing there like an innocent Japanese school girl with his arms behind his back and an expecting look on his face.

Dracolich to dwarven king: You expect me to fight for your cause for no reimbursement whatsoever as well as to put my unlife into your hands as an insurance that I will not betray you? I don't think that's fair.
Warmage: I don't think that's fair, either.
GM: I like that support from the back corner there.

GM: Alright, you're now at the temple. Do you want to ask Moradin something in particar?
Cleric: Phew...
Mage: What is loooove?
GM: The aether reverberates with "Baby don't hurt me..."

GM: "Loki, what should I do?" - "Fuck that priest!" - "How is this going to help?" - "How should I know. You asked what you should do!"

Cleric: ...on my last words a small electric current runs through everyone involved.
Spellsword: Damn it, why do the batteries always have to die right at the climax?

Spellsword: Don worry, any shallow jokes I come up with hit right at belt level for the dwarves.

Dwarven king: Alright, does everyone agree to the plan?
Everyone: Yes.
Warmage: Of course not.
Cleric: STOP IT! Stop being contrarian for the sake of it!

Spellsword: As soon as I can I go and start stealing blankets and pillows. Not from private rooms but from the storage rooms. I wouldn't want to steal from actual people.
GM: Robin Rin is on the loose!

Dwarven king: I am the protector of Mithral Hall.
Cleric: And I am the protector of the entire dwarven race.
GM: Dick measuring, nice.

Guard: Oh, now this looks tasty!
Spellsword: No, I put the food I stole into my Bag of Holding.
GM: As you wish. I was going to give you a way to distract the guards.

GM: Alright, Warmage has reached the dungeon. Are the guards still alive?
Spellsword: I didn't kill them.
GM: I wasn't talking to you. I said: Warmage has reached the dungeon. Are the guards still alive? A Disintegrate doesn't take long to cast.
Warmage: Excuse me? I'm trying to be less trigger happy here. What with them being allies and shit.

Mage: To be honest, the situation ain't quite as bad as I thought.
Cleric: Please tell me you didn't just say that.

Spellsword: The drow and I will one day kill each other.
Cleric: Why exactly?
Spellsword: That I have yet to figure out.

Mage: GM? Did you just enlarge the winter elements of the map?
GM: Nah.
Mage: I don't like!

Mage: ...and fucking Tiago is on our door step.
GM: Fucking "Duke" Tiago, please. And I can guarantee you that he didn't gain this rank through asskissing.

Spellsword: The issue here is, we're a chaotic-stupid party.

Mage: Where have you been?!
Druid: In the forest. I lost you guys and couldn't find my way back and then I met some nymphs and a stag and a hole in a tree...
Mage: And you didn't notice the seven thousand undead hanging around?
Druid: I thought they belong here?

Mage: Everything's going peachy! But good for you, about frolicking in the forest and such.
Druid: Actually, I think I'll just go back there.

Talking abour 'scrying'...
Druid: Know your target well?
GM: Yeah, it's alright, they got drunk while you were around.
Druid: That can be said about every NPC we've ever met.

GM: ..On a couple corners you can see riding lizards standing around. Since it's winter and they're cold, they are wearing cozy Christmas sweaters.

Mage: I am wearing a heavy, politically-choked non-grin.

Mage: I have to admit, we're making an impression. Not a good one, but it's an impression.

Druid: Say, at which point comes the moment we call this thing done? Like, "can't safe the day anymore"-done?
Mage: Neeeever?
Druid: Let me rephrase this: when comes the point where we say "it's a pity about the civilians but we've got a Weave to safe"?
Mage: Not yet.

GM:While you run you can hear the wolf shout behind you: "I can smeeell you!"
Druid: Sorry! Didn't mean to!

GM: Jarlaxle, probably: I fucked my way into this mess, I will fuck my way out.

Mage (Chosen of Loki) to Loki: Say, I know I'm a bother, but how bad would it be if Zeus's pantheon got involved in this mess?
GM: You receive a general feeling "Oh for fuck's sake" but cannot tell if it's directed at you or at Zeus.

Druid: I'm telling you guys, the moment things escalate to a fight I'm knifing the first drow I see in the back.
GM: Our heroes, ladies and gentlemen.

Druid: Are we still thinking about involving the Greek pantheon even though your boss told you "No"?
Mage: Technically, he said "NOT ZEUS". He didn't mention the rest of them.

Guard: Who's there?
Mage: One moment... *long pause* Gragor Boneweaver, Chosen of Moradin, and his companions!
Druid: You totally just had to read that off somewhere.

Dwarven king: I should never have allowed the orcs to settle at our borders. They breed with EVERYTHING. Unbelievable. They should be exterminated.
Mage: First off: orc lives matter. In this instance, anyway. Second...

Druid: Excuse me, but how often have we relied on our enemies being idiots and paid for it?

Dwarven king: Oh my god, we have to inspect all the refugees! There might be shapeshifting frost giants among them!
Mage: I hope you have proper documentation about who you let it. - I love it when I can sneak in some political commentary.

Dwarven king: The orcs up there are a ticking time bomb!
Mage: I think I'll refrain from saying "More like a copulating time bomb."
GM: Thank you.
Druid: And it's getting bigger by the minute!
GM: ...

GM: Are you pretending to be drunk?
Druid: I'm trying to remember what it's like to be drunk...

This post has been edited by Puck: 16 December 2018 - 07:25 PM

Puck was not birthed, she was cleaved from a lava flow and shaped by a fierce god's hands. - [worry]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
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#51 User is offline   TheRetiredBridgeburner 

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Posted 16 December 2018 - 09:41 PM

That's all brilliant, but the winter will come one was my favourite!

Also, chaotic stupid.... I'm currently waiting for a tshirt to arrive that has a D20 design and the words "Chaotic Stupid is not an alignment" on it Posted Image
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#52 User is offline   Puck 

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Posted 06 January 2019 - 12:41 AM

So, my character died today :( Which wouldn't that bad, but he managed to do so right in the first round of the big boss fight we've been working towards for a looong while! *hides in shame*

I mean, we've now got the funds to resurrect party members, but I'm honestly torn. On the one side, he's my favourite character and I'm not done with his character arc yet. On the other hand, the way he died would mean that in-character he'd rather stay dead than face the shame. Oh my... Decisions.
Puck was not birthed, she was cleaved from a lava flow and shaped by a fierce god's hands. - [worry]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
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#53 User is offline   Tsundoku 

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Posted 06 January 2019 - 08:38 AM

Was it death by swirly?
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

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#54 User is offline   Puck 

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Posted 06 January 2019 - 02:53 PM

It was death by his own spell. That's what happens when you try to disintegrate something, throw True Strike and Sudden Empower into the mix, then get your spell reflected in your face.
Puck was not birthed, she was cleaved from a lava flow and shaped by a fierce god's hands. - [worry]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
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#55 User is offline   Tsundoku 

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Posted 07 January 2019 - 03:48 AM

At least the other characters don't have to dig a grave or carry his stuff.

:(
"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#56 User is offline   Puck 

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Posted 11 January 2019 - 02:17 AM

In case anyone cares, here's some more fun from the aforementioned fight...


Mage: We're not QUITE as incompetent as we may seem.
Warmage: Indeed, we managed quite well against Alegni.
Mage: It's just that nobody else was there to tell the tale.
GM: Right, you always manage to only be competent at fighting whenever nobody is around to witness it.

Cleric: The thing is, I need a turn to cast a spell and I've still got one, two, three, four... SIX spells in the queue.
Mage: Well, does Tiago get down from his stupid dragon now or does he not?
Cleric: NO HE DOESN'T! I'm still casting!

Spellsword: As for me, I draw my sword. It is big and it glows pink. And that's my fight preparations done with.

Cleric: What the fuck? Why is Spellsword suddenly so huge?
GM: Because she enlarged herself. And also because she'd like to reduce Armour Class for some reason.

GM: It's Spellsword's turn.
Spellsword: Wait a moment. I did not expect the situation to become this great. I need to do some maths.

GM: I warned you not to try and stand in the way of a Full Attack from Tiago.
Spellsword: I didn't mean to. I meant to stand back here. But I forgot that I meant to.

Spellsword: Damn it!What did I roll just now? Wait a moment...
Cleric: Spellsword.exe has detected a problem and has to be shut down.

Cleric: We've just lost our entire artillery in one go!
GM: Well, I guess Warmage can lean back and relax for the remainder of the session now.

Druid: I call a triceratops.
Warmage: Come on, triceratops, avenge me!

Cleric: I have my little spirit here enter Drizzt. Damn, that came out wrong.

Mage, who is also playing as Drizzt for the evening: Oh come on... The Big Hunter TM has no big abilities to heal himself. Are you kidding?

Mage: The Big Hunter TM has just done all of 14 points of damage.
Warmage: To be fair, that's more than I managed to do.
Cleric: Technically speaking, not quite.
GM: Technically speaking you did do 131 points of damage. The big question is: to whom?

Speaking about resurrection...
Warmage: I have no idea what to do and how to continue, but I can tell you guys ONE thing: if I don't return as an elf again, I'm so done with you.

GM: Well, looks like Drizzt is dead. Not bad. Okay.

Druid: What the hell is Cattie doing back there, anyway? I thought she was supposed to help us?
GM: She's casting.
Druid: That's not what it looks like to me!
GM: I can add five Drow priestesses to the battle map if that's your idea of fun.

Mage: Well, shit. Alright, I'm going to do something I haven't done in a very long time. I throw a Magic Missile at him.
GM: ...How cute.
Mage: It reflects right off of him, I guess?
GM: Indeed.
Mage: ...Cool.

Warmage: Could Cattie please keep her dirty Mary Sue paws off my ashes, please?
GM: Excuse her? Dear Cattie is doing her best to do something about your state of being dead?
Druid: She's scooping and fronding as best as she can!
GM: All in due order, all in due order.

Mage: Holy fuck, this is humiliating?
Warmage: How do you think I feel?
Spellsword: He's got a point.

GM: Ehem, I just remembered that True Resurrection takes ten minutes to cast. I'm sorry, Warmage, you'll have to wait.
Mage: Didn't you snark about player characters trying to resurrect party members in the mids of a fight just the other day?!
GM: Yes, but Cattie is an NPC. That's... different.

Druid: According to plan, it was supposed to be my job to keep the party alive during the fight, as far as I remember.
GM: And you failed at that spectacularly.

Mage: Don't forget, Cleric can still port himself 45 feet away.
GM: It's a zoomdwarf!

Cleric: Aaalright, then I'll have to look it up. With this, my turn is going to take five minutes longer. Deal with it.

GM: *takes a look at the rolls* Well, I guess what you see is that both Druid and his familiar just stand around and wave their arms, teeth and claws pointlessly. Nice picture.

GM: Oh, Tiago's Haste spell has just run out.
Mage: FINALLY!

Cleric: I'm glad he's frustrated. Serves him right. He shall suffer!

Mage: *rolls very badly*
Druid: Dude, I told you not to use my dice!
Mage: Stick your damn dice where the sun don't shine!
Druid: Up my nose?!

Druid: At first, the fight was all KABOOM and BAM! And now it's just a common fist fight.
GM: Tiago can still reflect a Disintegrate up to 75%. Any takers?

GM: Tiago gets himself some of his hit points back.
Mage: That little piss nose!
Druid: Wait for it, in a bit GM will be like "Hey, he's back to below 100 HP! Again!"
GM: You got, we're just about there again.

Druid turns into a triceratops and rams Tiago: I got a Tiago glued to my nose. Can someone please scrape it off? It's disgusting.

Cleric: How's Cattie doing, anyway?
GM: Excellent! But don't worry, I'll rain on her parade in a minute.

Druid: Can I get a +3 for flanking, too?
GM: No, you're not flanking. There's a door beside you.
Druid: Any chance of there being a dwarf behind that door?
GM: Not a friendly dwarf.

Mage: Hey, at least we are finally using that team flanking charm I've been carrying around with me for who knows how long! Never mind that we're doing so against an enemy we meant run run away from screaming at first chance...

Mage: Guys, we've got to kill him in the coming turn. My barely readable buff list is about to run out of space.

Mage: No discussing! Killing!

GM: Ah, I guess we will have an Aerith moment anyway. Tiago kills Cattie.
Mage: ...you're only doing this because you can't stand Cattie.
GM: Damn right.

Spellsword: I told you. Who needs tactics when they've got a flying dwarf?

Mage: What did you say?!
GM: It's done. You've been fighting a 5-HP-Tiago the past two turns.
Druid: Now! Now! Any famous victor's words?!

Cleric: I put a foot on his chest, raise my axe and cut off his head. Then I say: 'This is for Monk!'
Spellsword, also dead: Thanks a bunch! How kind of you to think about us! You are aware he had nothing to do with Monk's death by his own stupidity, right?

GM: Necromancer, with a quivering lower lip, looks down on the pile of ashes that's left of Warmage and looks liek he's about to cry. Then he rolls up his sleeve and proclaims: 'I can do that!'
Mage: Uhm. Keep it cool. We've got loot and priests. We can manage.
Necromancer: Yes, but...
Mage: No zombie Warmage.
Warmage: I dunno, sounds charming.

Mage: Ruin? Are you alright down there?!
Silchas Ruin: I'm not quite sure yet! I'm still trying to gain a convert my cause here.
Cleric: A what?
Mage: And how's it going?
Silchas Ruin: I'm not quite sure yet! I've yet to pull him back out of the water. - In the background you can hear a dragon that's being held beneath the lake's surface splashing loudly near panic. Then how he is pulled back up and a voice shouting: 'And now? Does Tiamat sound like an attractive option NOW?'

GM: Alright, then we shall end this session on the image of the crying king of dwarves.
Druid: No, no, you're got to make more authentic. He enters the hall, sees Cattie's dead body and breaks down crying: 'Do you have ANY idea how much this is going to cost me?!'
Puck was not birthed, she was cleaved from a lava flow and shaped by a fierce god's hands. - [worry]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
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#57 User is offline   Puck 

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Posted 20 January 2019 - 10:40 PM

Here we go again. Maybe it amuses some people. If not, just pipe up and say so :p While everyone was off trying to resurrect the two dead PCs from last session, me and the other player got to play one-off characters for shits and giggles.



Mage: You there! Go and get the king a pike!
GM: The dwarf takes a good look at you, then at his king, at you, at the king, then he walks over to one of the other guards and asks: "What's a pike?"
Mage: A spear, damn you!

Dwarf Priest NPC: We ain't got nothing to do here with such arcane shit.
Cleric: Ugh, guess Necromancer will have to do the job for now.
GM: Necromancer is currently busy piling Warmage's ashes into a neat round pile on the other altar. Then he draws two eyes and a mouth with his finger in the ashes.
Cleric: What's up with that weird relationship between him and.. What's his name again? Warmage?

Druid: Are we going to bring Warmage back as a dracolich?
Mage: No fucking way. He's dangerous enough as a normal mortal. We don't need him dangerous AND without any last shreds of morals.

Ruin: Depends. Which deity does Warmage worship?
Mage: I forget what it's called. Quetzal-something? Ah, no, it was Ehecatl.
Cleric: Are you sure it's not some eldritch abomination?

Ruin: I guess we'll have to walk from Silverymoon. Unless you can siffon spells from a pile of ashes.
Spellsword: Oh, right. I forgot. Mage has lost his spell list last session.
Mage: I CAN cast my own spells! I don't ONLY steal spell slots!

Druid: I guess I'll just wait at the tavern.
GM: Go with the party, damn you! - Is what you hear a voice shout from the forest.
Druid: Silvanus? Is that you? Have you finally noticed me?!

Bard: Hello, nice to meet you. My name is Luciel Elena Blair von Sengendwald. Also known as the Lawful Feather. ..Is there a problem?
Druid: Your name's too short.

GM: There comes a voice from Mage's backpack: "She is a true artist! I can see that from here!"
Bard: Where does this lovely voice come from? Who are you?
Mage's Gremlin Familiar: I am the personal assistant of Allando Roderick Geraldo von Peachtree A'Doro!
Mage: Stop it! Stop twisting my name whichever way you idiots please!

Druid: The poor owl. I I cast a Cure Moderate Wounds and give it 22HP.
GM: The owl is already writing a court case of harassment against you. You touched her unasked!

Potentially Evil Dragon Cultist: I suck on my cigarette and point at Mage's backpack: "Whatever is in there, I like it!"
Mage's Familiar: I like you, too!
Cleric: I throw a snow ball against the backpack. "Shut up!"
Familiar: Ey! That's mean!

Druid: Well, I think the situation is great as always. We killed Lolth's Chosen Warrior before even lunch rolled around today and nobody gives a rat's ass!

GM: Your Familiar is not listening. He's half hanging out of your backpack and talking to Bard: "We killed Lolth's Chosen. Lolth. It's spelled like L o l o l th..."
Bard: Yes. Yes. Thanks you, how kind.

Bard: Can we do something about that giant owl? Can it be brought away?
Druid: Where's that pokeball if you need one, eh?

Mage: I whisper to Druid: "We're not taking either of those clowns with us."
Druid: Is this one of those statements of yours? Like "We'll never go down to the Underdark"? Right before we do it?
Mage: Oh well, the we WILL take them with us, but they're going to have an accident on the way.
Bard: I have a sneaking suspicion that Mage does not like my new player character.

GM: Your Familiar is still hanging out of your backpack and telling Bard the juiciest stories.
Mage: He's never been THIS actie before. I am getting worried. Familiar, come on, you can't be serious about her.

Bard: Yes, yes, and what happened to the gold-shitting lizard you used to have with you?
Familiar: His head exploded because of a magical headband our druid, also known as the Ruler of Devils, had given him as a wise precaution.
Mage: Will you shut up?!

Mage: Pretty sure out lizard folk monk was not giving out gold on every corner. It was bread.
GM: We're working here with several layers of fake news, in case you hadn't noticed.

Mage: Hey, Necromancer. Whatever you did with Spellsword the last time she died... Can you do that thing again?
Necromancer: Ehrm...
Mage: I see. And here I though I was the guy to do spells by the seat of my pants.
GM: As you can see now, Necromancer has been secretly learning from you.

Mage: I use our mindlink to speak to my precious Familiar: "Remember, this is a matter of life and death! No talking about the white dragon! We've got this one suspicious person with us who's potentially a member of the Cult of the Dragon and she might get REALLY pissed if she finds out we've just killed a dragon!"
Familiar: Distract her, then! Tell her Ruin's a dracolich! - By the way, he shouts that aloud across the hall.
Mage: Oh for fuck's sake!

Druid: Have you ever heard the elven name Incariol?
Librarian: I don't know? Which elven subrace was he from?
Druid: Something deathly grey, I think?

Cultist: The next time Ruin happens to turn around he will find that I've crept closer and am sniffing at his cloak.
GM: He's not too happy about that. Forced smiles and all.

GM: You can hear a hissing sound coming from the potential Cultist's collar.
Cleric: That doesn't sound good. She should visit a doctor. Why not do so now?

Mage: Ruin, listen! We could teleport TODAY!
Ruin: How? Has one of you found a stray Teleport in his spell list?
Mage: Well, there's this certain young lady over there in the purple robes...
Ruin: Oh, I'm sure such a lovely lady would not want to find herself in the ruins of Hellgate Keep. Why would she ever want to see that much dirt?
Mage: Hey, she's certainly a big admirer od dragons and would probably love to see a citadelle built by one.
Ruin: There's not much left of it, though.
Mage: Well, but it was destroyed by a dragon, too!
Cultist: Indeed! Indeed!

Mage: I tap on Cultist's shoulder. - "Don't get scared when he shapeshifts."
Cultist: I just innocently flutter my eyelashes at you.
Mage: Oh, so you already know he's a dracolich? Should've figured as much.
Cultist: Uhuh.

Mage: Let's go, climb on board. At least it's so cold up there our two new party members will finally shut up. I hope.

Druid: What's that?
Bard: My pure-bred cat.
Mage: Is it as pure-bred as that owl you rode into a wall earlier today?
Bard: Of course not. I've just... heard rumors. I was fully prepared for my mount to die should I manage to locate you.
GM: You hear Ruin in your thoughts: "Look, finally someone who knows what it's like to travel with you."
Mage: Did he... Did he really just cast a telepathy spell just to diss me?
GM: Yes.

Mage, whiny: I don't want any damn bardic guild on my tracks!
Druid, copying the whiny voice: Not again that pesky Greyhawk Gazette!

GM: Ruin is glad to show you around Hellgate Keep, of yourse. - "Well, here's the market square, over there is the chruch and behind that there use to live some people. There. Done. Go away."

Cultist: I'd like to point out that one the so called dumasses here is not as dumb as she may look.
Bard: Ow, how nice of you! I can give the compliment right back, though.

GM: What you're now reading is basically like the Silmarillion, but way thicker.

Mage: So, basically a Moria-situation, but with elves.
GM: Moria-elves in the Abyss.
Mage: Doesn't that sound great...

Mage to Bard: Look, black magic pearls that can call black magic fortresses from another plane are a no-go topic down here... Have you found anything interesting about it?

Mage: Well, we could try and find Warmage's old Abyssal fortress again, turn it into a flying citadell and use it to travel the planes in comfort... It's not like he needs it anymore.

Bard: Is there a workroom over there?
Ruin: Not at all.
Bard: Is the way to it studded with traps?
Ruin: Any hypothetical workroom down here would be one giant trap if there even was one. - He glares at you to drive the point home.

Ruin: It's not bad, it's just that most people are bothered when the plane they're on gradually sucks their life energy out of them.
Mage: But you're actively suppressing that right now?
Ruin: Yes, mostly. - He says with a side glance at Cultist.
Mage: Note to self: eat an apple when back on the surface.

Druid: Is is just the plane or do you have people who regularly come down and clean here?
GM: Do you ask that aloud?
Druid: I ask that quietly.
GM: Then you're not getting an answer.

GM: As soon as you sit down at the table there appears food and drink for you.
Cultist: How neat!
Bard: Is that food locally produced, though?
Ruin: I dearly hope that it is not.
Bard: But it would be ecologically much more efficient and probably more tasty if it was locally produced.
Mage: What about "plane of darkness" did you not understand?

Bard: Oh, are dragons an endangered species?
Mage: They will be if we keep going like this.

Mage: I'm getting the sneaking suspicion that all of thise was a huge mistake...

Mage: Look, Cleric, I'll be frank here. I know you dwarves and the orcs aren't exactly friends and such, but we've got a world to safe, so our anonymous... donation to the orcish war chest HAS to remain a secret. Get it?

Familiar: Quite right, as the saying goes, you always see each other twice in life. Even if it's the mighty king of Giat.
Mage: Remember that when he's shooting lightning at us the next time, because I AM going to run away. With my backpack and its contents facing back towards him.
Familiar: If you already know this, how about getting used to wearing your backpack in the front?

Spellsword: If I was able to feel anything at all, I would have a headache now.

Mage: Hey! Great to see you! Let me hug you!
Drow NPC: Yes! - You notice how he's fingering you ass.
Mage: Great. I'm just going to ignore that.
GM: Pity. He now pulls a giant abacus from his tiny pant pocket and starts calculating what you owe him.

Drow NPC: Do you want one or two of my people with you?
Mage: The king pays, so I'm going to say two.

Mage: How are your spell slots for today faring?
Warmage: I'll let the GM decide.
GM: Since you're technically still in the same day as yesterday after being resurrected, whatver you had left you still have available.
Warmage: So pretty much everything. It's not like I managed to cast a lot yesterday.
GM: True, that.

GM, describing an orc village: There are a lot of orcs, doing orc things.

Spellsword: Can I take some time off while you talk to the warlord?
Mage: What, do you want to randomly punch people again?
Druid: "Excuse me, sir, would you be up to having a brawl? I am frustrated."

Druid: Wait, something about "no beer before four o'clock"... Eh, fuck it. It's past four in the morning, let's go find a tavern.

Druid: Hey, where can I get something to drink hereabouts?
Orc: Well, we've got two big taverns here, but they both only sell alcohol after five o'clock.
Mage: Right. Well, what other shops do we have here? Since we've got time to waste.
GM: There's a market square, but it is empty because it's past lunch and everyone went home already.
Mage: I see, there's been a lot of "getting cultured" going around this place in the past hundred years.
Warmage: Are you serious? Where are we? In the Orc Edition of Age of Empires?

Druid: You know what? We've got to keep secrets from all of out allies. We've got to keep secrets from the king. I'm going to sit my furry ass in a tavern right now, buy myself an apple spritzer and tell the first orc who cares to listen EVERYTHING.
Mage: You're not having a mental break down right now, are you?

This post has been edited by Puck: 20 January 2019 - 10:48 PM

Puck was not birthed, she was cleaved from a lava flow and shaped by a fierce god's hands. - [worry]
Ninja Puck, Ninja Puck, really doesn't give a fuck..? - [King Lear]
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Posted 21 January 2019 - 05:28 PM

I've been meaning to post in this thread for a while, but I've been modding a Twilight Imperium game, so was always on the mod alt, and didn't want to post from there.

So, I have been playing D&D 5E with a group of friends for over 4 years now (our very first session was in October 2014). I started out as a player. My very first character was a teenaged (by human standards even) Wood Elf Wizard named Skrow who was left for dead as a very young child by his parents, grew up on the streets of a Dwarven city until a kindly Tiefling scholar sort of adopted me and brought me into the arcane arts. In a quest for more and more power, Skrow accidentally sold his best friend's soul to an Infernal demon, and so his life now revolves around doing whatever is necessary (WHATEVER is necessary) to save her. He travelled with a Human Rogue named Grizzin, a Gold Dragonborn Paladin named Torrin, and a Wood Elf Druid named Paelias. Paelias' player was the first to drop out as she couldn't commit the time necessary to play, then Torrin's player as he just wasn't having fun. Then a Tiefling Warlock named Numeia and a Gold Dragonborn Barbarian named Geth joined the party for a while. We got up to many shenanigans - the rogue and I particularly spent a lot of time stealing shit and starting gang wars and fucking with local cults (a la Quick Ben and Kalam), and we have now found ourselves in Hell. That's where we paused that game so that I could start DMing!

I now DM two different games with my regular group, and a game with a group of players I found through the Critical Role fansite on Facebook. All take place in the same universe, which is shared with the world that I was a player in - a world created by my original DM who is now a player. One of my current players is now starting to dip his toe into DMing, so now and again we do nights where he DMs and I get to play again, which is fun! I'll go through what's going on in all three campaigns now for anyone who is interested! :p

Elemental Planes

3, then 4, then 3, then 4 players. Sessions started out weekly but are now bi-weekly.

Our main campaign group is on an epic quest through the Elemental Planes, which are currently sealed off from the material plane due to some shenanigans in the Plane of Fire, which used to be the Plane of Life until the goddess Loviatarr burned it down. The main premise of the story is that the god Gond, current steward of the Plane of Earth, summoned the adventurers to the Elemental Planes with the last of his magic as a last ditch effort to stop Loviatarr from consuming the entirety of the Elemental Planes. No one really knows what happened to Mielikki, the steward of the Plane of Life, before Loviatarr burned it to ash and they no longer have the time to try to figure it out. All of the planes are under attack by agents of Loviatarr. As the heroes moved through the planes, they would discover that it is not simply Loviatarr, but a deeper evil, that of the Void, that threatens existence on the planes.

It started out with a Kitsune Cleric of Mielikki named Finn, a Sahaguin Fighter named Shalesh and a Soulbound Bard named Bounder. Immediately upon learning why they were dragged to the Elemental Planes, Gond's keep came under siege by Loviatarr's forces. The players chose to escape through a complex maze of tunnels under the keep that came out near the Mud Wastes, which borders the Plane of Earth and Plane of Ooze. They made their way across the Mud Wastes, hitching a ride on the back of immense walking island towns on the backs of Ancient Tarrasques, upon which lived warring factions of Gith - Githyanki and Githzerai - who lived on the moving cities. Of course, it was mating season as the players tried to make their way across the planes, so they got to have a fun battle on the back of mating Ancient Tarrasques while the Gith all around them were fighting in the air. That was one of my proud DM moments.

Next was the Plane of Ooze - as you can imagine, lots of oozes here. Was lots of fun! Finally, they made it to the Plane of Water. Here I borrowed a couple of adventures from the Adventurere's League material, and modified it to fit my story. At one point in the store, I had Shalesh replaced by a Rakshasa. Only Shalesh's player and myself knew, I did a one on one session with Shalesh's player to go through what Shalesh went through while the player played as the Rakshasa (who we called Rakshalesha) as if they were Shalesh. Eventually, of course, Rakshalesha betrayed the party, almost got everyone killed, if it weren't for real Shalesh, who had managed to escape his imprisonment, the party would have died. In the end, Shalesh (the character) chose to leave the game to rule the Plane of Water after the heroes saved Umberlee, Bitch Queen of the Depths, and steward of the Plane of Water, from death by the Crushing Wave, an Undersea Beholder which had been imprisoned in the depths, and who was set free when Umberlee was incapacitated by a Void sliver, teaching the heroes that the void can threaten even the gods. The player introduce her new character, a Firbolg Druid named Thia Nightbreeze, who ended up with the party as they were trying to find their way into the Coral Keep where the Undersea Beholder was keeping Umberlee prisoner.

The Plane of Ice had the players scrambling through dark, haunted caverns. At one point, Bounder (the bard) invited a tortured spirit into his "Mordenkainen's Magnificent Mansion," so I took that opportunity to introduce a Dresden Files' Lasciel style second mind inside the bard's magic. As the players progressed and Bounder spent more time talking to her - Lara Swiftshadow was her name - they would eventually realize that she was the soul of one of the very first participants in Paimonn's, a powerful Djinni on the Plane of Air, Soulbound program, the program that created Bounder in the first place. It is through this that Bounder realizes that he's not only millenia old, but that he was one of the very first, if not the very first, Soulbound ever created.

The players eventually end up on the Plane of Air, in a mining city where Air Genasi work the mines for Adamanthril and Abyssian Silver, both important components in the creation of sentient constructs due to their magical properties. Here they meet a new player, a Tabaxi Warlock named Turquoise Mudstick, who joins them at the behest of his patron, The Gentleman. They help defend the mines from an attack by a group of sentient constructs who deem themselves Servants of Paimonn, and who, it turns out, have been causing havok throughout the Planes of Air. The Air Djinni, Paimonn, rules from an airborned Arcology called Mistrall. The Arcology is a city-sized airship, held aloft by an Aethersphere, and on which live 5 races - the Thri-Kreen, who are the original inhabitants of the Elemental Planes, the Aetherborne who maintain the Aethersphere, the Bishtahar Elves who have learned to intertwine the natural with the mechanical, creating beautiful works of biomechanical art, the Vedalkans, a race of tinkerers who help to keep everything running, and the Constructs, sentient or otherwise. Paimonn's power has grown, and he now threatens to overthrow the steward of the Plane of Air, Talos, God of Storms, who rules from his seat in the castle in the clouds, Aaqa.

On their way up a mountain near the mining city, the players face a sphinx who provides them with a choice between 7 portals. The players could either choose to go through any portal without knowing where it leads, or could answer a riddle correctly to get information about specific doors. So I went and found 7 really original riddles of varying difficulty. Of course, the one I thought my players would never get is the first one they got, and that portal teleported them to the foot of Paimonn's throne. My plan was for him to be the BBEG of the Plane of Air, that the players would work their way through the Labyrinth Winds, get to Aaqa, save some Blue Dragons from Talos' cruelty (he's enslaving them to fight Paimonn and his constructs) and eventually fight Paimonn, who would turn an entire section of his city into an immense construct the players would have to destroy before facing Paimonn. But the players decided to teleport to Paimonn's throne room. Bounder had a "Father where have you been all my life!" moment with him, then I had a week to rewrite the entire plane of Air.

The heroes find out that Paimonn is infected by the Void, but choose not to confront him about it just yet. As they spend more time on the Arcology, they meet three of the five consuls, the leaders of each race that live on the arcology. It seems that the Vedalkan and the Construct consuls - Jainus Windstorm and Tinker - are behind the void infection of Paimonn, and that they have not only infected Paimonn but the Aethersphere itself. The players visit the Aethersphere where Finn uses the Etherealness spell to float to its centre where the void infection began, and uses a Wish spell he had won in a special one off Free for All Melee Brawl, to cleanse the sphere. Of course, I used that opportunity to infect Finn with the void. It gives him incredible powers (I've replaced his Etherealness spell with the ability to cast one of 5 different level 9 spells at risk of outright being removed from existence, dying, or just forgetting something such as his name, the concept of names, or time, or whatever I desire if he rolls badly on his Void check). They then manage to take down the Vedalkan and Construct consuls, wake up the Thri-Kreen Prime Paragon, Korven, who has the power to cleanse the void from the Elemental Planes, and eventually face Paimonn, who uses the constructs of his ship to create crazy mech suits that they have to fight before they can hurt him, and whose void infection births a void dragon, all while the denizens of Mistral Arcology, which has flown to the Castle of the Clouds, Aaqa, fight a war against Blue Dragons and Air Elementals outside. Eventually the heroes manage to stun Paimonn long enough for Korven to cleanse the void from him, at which point Paimonn immediately calls a retreat and stops the war.

The players are now on the Plane of Fire, attempting to awaken other Thri-Kreen paragons, who will help them cleanse the void from the Elemental Planes completely. They have found out that Mielikki, Finn's goddess, is the Architect, the one responsible for the infection of the Planes by the void. It was meant to be a cleansing of powers in the Planes, to be controlled by her and a number of her godly and fey allies. In the Plane of Fire sleep five paragons, under five dragonshrines which represent the different aspects of Life, as this was the Plane of Life before Loviatarr came. Unabashedly stolen/modified from WoW's Wrath of the Lich King expansion - the Ruby Dragonshrine represents life, the Bronze Dragonshrine, time, the Emerald Dragonshrine, dreams and memories, the Azure Dragonshrine, magic, and the Onyx Dragonshrine, death. The players have cleared out the Ruby Dragonshrine, which had been infested by a race of void parasites called slivers (borrowed from Magic the Gathering), and are now working their way through the Bronze Dragonshrine, where they are racing alternate reality versions of themselves through a Cube (the movie)-style maze.

All in all, we are having a lot of fun with this high level campaign. I sometimes find it difficult to create battles that engage my players as much because they are so powerful at level 16 with a slough of magic items - it becomes less about bashing away at HP and hoping you can do it faster than the other guys, and more about providing challenges for each player individually, sometimes all at once, sometimes individually. I particularly enjoy using lair actions to rearrange the battlefield reality - split the group up with walls of fire/force/ice/whatever, using monsters to pull players into alternate planes, so that players have to hold off on killing it and get their friend back first. I think we're all experiencing a bit of campaign fatigue as well - everyone just wants to be done with the Elemental Planes, but I am determined to finish the story!


The Adventures of Simon and Riswynn

2, then 3, then 4 players. We tend to do these when one or more of the players from Elemental Planes can't make it to a regular game night, though sometimes when everyone is around depending on what's going on in the story.

This campaign started off as a one-shot that I ran for the players of the Finn and Shalesh/Thia characters in the above campaign on a night where the Bounder character couldn't make it and the other players weren't playing yet. A tall Dwarven Paladin named Riswynn Jadeoath, Paladin to Haela Brightaxe, the dwarven goddess of Luck and Battle, whose main goal is to bring Haela, who is a dead goddess, back into the mainstream, and a very short, very old, bearded and very crazy High Elf named Simon who always has his oddly anthropomorphic flying broom named Bessy nearby, find themselves working together on random odd jobs around the city of Tranrakk. Ostensibly they work for a man named Bargus, who runs a sort of back alley mercenary business out of a tavern called the Tired Swallow, but it seems like every time they are doing a job for him, they are pulled into some sort of alternate dimension where an old lady who breathes the smoke from seeds she throws on a fire (yes, Crippled God reference) named Bandaga gives them additional tasks related to whatever job they are working on. It doesn't take long for them to get truly embroiled in the politics of the city of Tranrakk - a theocratic city whose rulers - the priests of the various dwarven gods - are very unhappy with the upstart paladin of Haela, a dead goddess and thus a dead religious order, trying to wedge her way into their affairs.

One day during the festival of Greengrass, when they are protecting a nearby village from orc raiding parties, they are led to a set of caverns near the city where a Duergar who looks a lot like Bandaga named Schmandaga (listen, I was drunk when I made her name up okay) who seems to constantly be munching on mushrooms she pulls from a messenger bag that's always on her shoulder, puts them into a dream state so that they could find out more about their past, and the past of Haela Brightaxe. It turns out that Riswynn is directly descended from a Captain Jadeoath that fought alongside Haela Brightaxe in the War of Gold and Gloom - a war between the Dwarves and Duergar versus the Illithids. Where it is commonly believed that Ladueger, one of the Duergar gods, and Haela Brightaxe are enemies, Riswynn discovers that they were actually lovers, despite Moridinn and Clangedin's misgivings. During the War of Gold and Gloom, they fight alongside each other and a powerful High Elf Cleric of Mielikki named Simonthuil who flies around on a broom, and has a fox familiar named Bessinger, and conceive a set of twins who they name Banondaga and Shamondaga. As they destroy the Illithid Hivemind, Moridin uses the outburst of psionic power to forcibly separate his daughter from Laduguer, changing the entire world's knowledge that they were lovers into the belief that they were enemies, removing memory of Banondaga and Shamondaga from the world. Laduguer lashes out, causing the Hivemind to explode, killing both himself and Haela. Deep Duerra, the Duergar goddess of psionics, uses this outflux of massive psionic power to twist the minds of Banondaga and Shamondaga, and placing the souls of Haela and Laduguer into them - Haela into Shamondaga and Ladueger into Banondaga, but making both forget that they are even Haela and Laduguer's kids. Mielikki, whose powerful cleric Simonthuil was present, uses the power to split Simonthuil's personality. She places the major part of his personality into the body of a Kitsune (though the Hivemind explosion removes all memories from both him and the others involved), leaves but a remnant of his soul inside his body, which would become old and decrepid and slightly crazy, and moved Bessinger's soul into the flying broom which would always protect Simon while the Kitsune part of his soul did some other work for Mielikki.

They have since been joined by a Gold Dragonborn Barbarian named Geth (who was one of the players in the original game I started in as a player) and a human barbarian girl named Sassy. It turns out that one of the people who trained Geth was Sassy's uncle, so Geth feels obligated to help keep her safe on behalf of his master. Sassy is kind of a blonde - within minutes of meeting him she ended up becoming Simon's employee. Simon's a crazy old elf who has very little understanding of business, or money, or, you know, work. He mostly just helps Riswynn out and sing karaoke at the Tired Swallow, where he has gathered quite a hipster following. The entire party fought in a melee during the Greengrass festival, where one of the entrants - a purported priestess of Deep Duerra - summons several demons and attacks the crowds and causes a general ruckus, then places all the blame on Riswynn. Riswynn is brought to trial, where it seems the Priests of Ladueger, a cult that has been causing problems south of Tranrakk, bring in a string of 'witnesses' to further condemn her. Of course, as this is happening, Simon, Geth and Sassy are out causing havok and getting the real story, which they burst into court at the last minute with. When the dwarves try to arrest the priestess of Deep Duerra, she screams and turns into a pool of energy that eventually becomes a portal into the Underdark, through which some Drow attack. The attack is pushed back into the Underdark, but no one can figure out how to close the portal, so the heroes are now being asked to act as emissaries to the underdark from Tranrakk on behalf of the city (there are some political machinations involved in all this, of course, but a lot of it behind the scenes so far, so I don't want to give too much away in case one of my players is on these forums).



Critical Role Team

5 players, once a month.

This final group is made of people I met through a Critical Role fansite on Facebook. They are made up of an Eladrin Druid named Elly, a Half-Elf Bard named Sephranthe, a Tabaxi Monk named Snow, a Firbolg Cleric named Buddy, and a High Elf Rogue named Kal'Eloran. They start out in a human city named Tirione, where the king is on the verge of declaring war on the other city states of Hilad, Dolone and Tiria. He is amassing the Crimson Guard (woohoo Malaz reference) mercenaries outside the city, and the heroes are new to the city, trying to do odd jobs to do some work. They help a few people around town, meet a few members of the Beryl Order - the king's knights who police the lands of Tirione - some acolytes of the Temple of Chauntea, some members of the royal house, and some members of the Crimson Guard. Eventually they are sent out of town to deal with some rumours of black magic in the countryside.

I now have them following the Adventurer's League Season 3 Part 1 story - Harried in Hillsfar - though I am upgrading the monsters they fight to match their level, and changing things now and again to make it fit into my world. We are having a lot of fun, but this group is a lot less into the RP aspect of the game, and a lot more into the gaming the game aspect of the game, which is fine, but makes it difficult to plan too much in terms of story (which is the reason I'm using premade adventures for the most part).



Grim Determinations

3-4 players. Every now and again whenever I don't feel like DMing, or a player is missing from Elemental Planes crew.

Our group runs a rundown, not very successful detective agency called the Night Hunters (even the name is derivative, how depressing). The leader is a Dwarven Paladin of Ilmater named Grimnir Nightshadow who is down on his luck and mostly just wants to martyr himself so that he doesn't have to live in this world anymore. His enforcer (my character) is a bald Earth Genasi Monk named Pedra Niall. She speaks little, preferring to communicate by means of chokeholds and other violence. He also employs the Tabaxi Swashbuckler Rogue, Captain Mittens McGlove, who speaks like a pirate, can't help but try to steal everything, and has a deep respect for the goddess Nosea, the goddess of cat allergies (cause the player's allergic to cats and is playing a Tabaxi), and a Human Illusionist named Mara, who is honestly the most competent person on staff, though no one ever really listens to her.

We have been tasked by the Great Library to discover what happened to some books that have gone missing. This has brought us to a tavern where we met a male hooker named Ramone, who Pedra obviously immediately fell in love with, and whose life she had to save when his tavern came under attack. Not much else has happened yet in this story, we've been mostly just exploring our characters so far, but I have really been enjoying getting to be a player again after having DM'd for nearly 2 years straight. This will likely be the storyline we pick up (or a storyline in the same locale but with different characters, we'll see) when we are done with Elemental Planes, and so far I'm having a ton of fun with it!





Anyway, sorry for the super long post, but I've been enjoying reading all your posts for a while now and have been meaning to chime in for some time! Glad I could finally do so!

This post has been edited by Blend: 21 January 2019 - 06:15 PM

There is no struggle too vast, no odds too overwhelming, for even should we fail - should we fall - we will know that we have lived. ~ Anomander Rake
My sig comes from a game in which I didn't heed Blend's advice. So maybe this time I should. ~ Khellendros
I'm just going to have to come to terms with the fact that self-vote suiciding will forever be referred to as "pulling a JPK" now, aren't I? ~ JPK
2

#59 User is offline   Malankazooie 

  • Elder God
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 6,693
  • Joined: 21-June 16

Posted 25 February 2019 - 01:51 AM

In the spirit of funny session banter, found the following - https://www.youtube....h?v=wHiYZXBURFU

"And then our party was attacked by a skeletal igloo."
"A what?"
"A Skeletal Igloo."
"How?"
"It jumped at us from the left and attempted to crush the Cleric."
"No, I mean how is it possible for A] an igloo to be made of bone, and B] a skeletal building to attack someone?"
"Welcome to the Abyss kid"

Interesting YouTube channel. One of those that you can find yourself checking out for quite some time if you don't make a concerted effort to get back to productive work. Posted Image
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#60 User is offline   Slow Ben 

  • Ranger
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 4,687
  • Joined: 29-September 08
  • Location:Southern Illinois

Posted 25 June 2019 - 10:43 PM

Hey, a D&D thread!

Been playing for a few weeks, even DM'd my first game last week. Safe to say i'm pretty much addicted.


I'll share my characters when i get a chance.
I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.
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