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Political Comedy starring world leaders and local idiots Laugh while you cry

#1201 User is offline   Tsundoku 

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Posted 11 January 2021 - 07:50 AM

The distinction is VERY important:

https://www.betootaa...k-man-joins-in/

US Capitol ‘Protests’ Officially Become ‘Riots’ After A Black Man Joins In

CLANCY OVERELL | Editor | CONTACT

Just hours ago, the Australian Government’s SmartTraveller website has just updated its section on the east coast of the United States.

While there was already a ban on overseas travel due to the pandemic, the US page has been updated to include this warning for Australians already in Washington DC.

Due to violent protests in Washington DC, curfews are in place in the District of Columbia and Commonwealth of Virginia from 6pm on Wednesday 6 January to 6am on Thursday 7 January 2021.

You should avoid areas where protests are occurring due to the ongoing potential for violence.

This follows a day that looks to have almost surely seen the greater Republican Party severing ties with US President Donald Trump.

Trump held a rally in Washington DC earlier in the day, urging the crowd to convince Vice-President Mike Pence to overturn the 2020 election result.

Congress then began a joint session, with Mike Pence presiding, to count the electoral college votes.

After Trump’s rally finished, the crowd left and some supporters stormed the US Capitol Building, which was placed in lockdown

The US Capitol Historical Society says this was the first time the Capitol has been physically broken into since 1814, when British soldiers stormed the space as part of the war of 1812.

While many watching at home have been asking why on earth hundreds of white terrorists are able to storm inside the US Capitol building without facing any repercussions – police say that they must respect the citizen’s right to protest.

However, since this update, Washington D.C Police have upgraded the situation from a simple ‘protest’ to a ‘riot’.

This comes after several police officer spotted a black American man joining in on the protests, a development that saw journalists and commentators immediately remove the ‘peaceful’ tag from any commentary surrounding the demonstrations.

The US Army has not yet been approached for back up, however, Washington D.C police say they will have no hesitation to request military support if the tally of angry black men rises to 3 – which is the universal benchmark for when riots transition into looting.

Despite the fact that this dramatic display of political unrest appears to be hinting towards an imminent civil war, no one has yet had a knee put on their neck for eight minutes.

If any Muslims arrive, it will be reclassified as ‘terrorism’.

This post has been edited by Tsundoku: 11 January 2021 - 07:51 AM

"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#1202 User is offline   Tiste Simeon 

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Posted 11 January 2021 - 09:30 AM

Still not sure if that is satire...
A Haunting Poem
I Scream
You Scream
We all Scream
For I Scream.
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#1203 User is online   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 11 January 2021 - 11:09 PM

Posted Image

Confirmed:

'His mother, Martha Chansley, told reporters outside the courthouse that her son needs an organic diet. "He gets very sick if he doesn't eat organic food," she said. "He needs to eat."'

https://www.azcentra...ing/6625619002/
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#1204 User is offline   Macros 

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Posted 12 January 2021 - 11:39 AM

Disregarding the fact that most organic food just about scrapes into the classification on technicalities and once certified most producers don't adhere to their guidelines very well. Hand him food and tell him it's organic, watch him not get sick then smack him in the head for being a fuckwit.
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#1205 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 12 January 2021 - 04:13 PM

What do you guys thin Puntin is thinking about, and ergo, planning?

Posted Image
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#1206 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 13 January 2021 - 07:23 AM

Posted Image

Posted Image

Posted Image


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#1207 User is offline   Tsundoku 

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Posted 13 January 2021 - 09:51 AM

Twitter thread looking back on some of the crazy stuff Trump did:

https://twitter.com/...879180658860032

This post has been edited by Tsundoku: 13 January 2021 - 09:52 AM

"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#1208 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 13 January 2021 - 08:13 PM

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#1209 User is online   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 14 January 2021 - 03:47 AM

'Trump Told Aides to Stiff Giuliani for Legal Services

The relationship between [...] Trump and his personal lawyer Rudy Giuliani is crumbling. [Trump] has told aides not to pay Giuliani at all for his legal work attempting to overturn Trump's loss in the November presidential election, according to The Washington Post. [...] Giuliani has traveled the country to testify before swing state lawmakers and promote the president's unfounded claims of widespread voter fraud. Trump told aides he wants to personally review any reimbursement requests from Giuliani. The former New York City mayor also demanded $20,000 per day at one point, reportedly angering Trump.'

https://www.thedaily...s-wapo?ref=home

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 14 January 2021 - 03:47 AM

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#1210 User is offline   Malankazooie 

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Posted 14 January 2021 - 03:52 PM

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#1211 User is online   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 14 January 2021 - 03:56 PM

'Trump was planning to set up a Parler account under the pseudonym “Person X” before the right-wing MAGA hellsite disappeared from the internet, according to the company’s CEO. According to Business Insider, the claim was buried in court filings in support of Parler’s case against Amazon Web Services (AWS), which pulled support from the network this week and caused it to drop offline. CEO John Matze claims that AWS was aware of Trump’s plans, so it abandoned Parler to prevent him from gaining a new platform.'

https://www.thedaily...ys-ceo?ref=home

'Q' was already taken....
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#1212 User is online   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 14 January 2021 - 08:26 PM

'Javanka's Secret Service Detail Pay $3K/Month for a Toilet

Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump, who live in a house with six bathrooms, can't spare one for the Secret Service agents tasked with protecting their lives. Instead, the government rents out a basement bathroom from their neighbor, to the tune of $3,000 a month[...] This arrangement has been in place since 2017, meaning taxpayers have shelled out $100,000 [...] "It's the first time I ever heard of a Secret Service detail having to go to these extremes to find a bathroom," one law enforcement official told the Post.

A White House spokesperson claimed it was the Secret Service's decision not to allow agents inside but a law enforcement source said it was done at Javanka's request.'

https://www.thedaily...toilet?ref=home

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 14 January 2021 - 08:26 PM

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#1213 User is offline   Aptorian 

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Posted 14 January 2021 - 09:19 PM

So many stories are going to come out when they begin going through paperwork.
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#1214 User is offline   Tsundoku 

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Posted 15 January 2021 - 12:48 AM

View PostAzath Vitr (D, on 14 January 2021 - 08:26 PM, said:

'Javanka's Secret Service Detail Pay $3K/Month for a Toilet

Jared Kushner and Ivanka Trump, who live in a house with six bathrooms, can't spare one for the Secret Service agents tasked with protecting their lives. Instead, the government rents out a basement bathroom from their neighbor, to the tune of $3,000 a month[...] This arrangement has been in place since 2017, meaning taxpayers have shelled out $100,000 [...] "It's the first time I ever heard of a Secret Service detail having to go to these extremes to find a bathroom," one law enforcement official told the Post.

A White House spokesperson claimed it was the Secret Service's decision not to allow agents inside but a law enforcement source said it was done at Javanka's request.'

https://www.thedaily...toilet?ref=home


Also:

https://www.news.com...d79d12729633f30



Cool, so if an incident occurs inside the house there's a decent chance we won't lose anyone that somebody might actually care about.

This post has been edited by Tsundoku: 15 January 2021 - 12:51 AM

"Fortune favors the bold, though statistics favor the cautious." - Indomitable Courteous (Icy) Fist, The Palace Job - Patrick Weekes

"Well well well ... if it ain't The Invisible C**t." - Billy Butcher, The Boys

"I have strong views about not tempting providence and, as a wise man once said, the difference between luck and a wheelbarrow is, luck doesn’t work if you push it." - Colonel Orhan, Sixteen Ways to Defend a Walled City - KJ Parker
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#1215 User is online   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 15 January 2021 - 04:31 AM

'QAnon Believers Think Trump Sent Them a Message in Morse Code During His Oval Office Address

[...] For those that have ears to hear. Patriots are in control.

Trumps hands don't move apart, except precisely at 4:20.

At which point Trump signals Morse code for Q.
_ _ . _

A Message from President Donald J. Trump https://youtu.be/hDNiNdsPHNA
'

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 15 January 2021 - 04:33 AM

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#1216 User is online   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 15 January 2021 - 06:21 AM

'Rudy Giuliani blames Game of Thrones for his Capitol attack riot speech

[...] "I was referencing the kind of trial that took place for Tyrion in that very famous documentary about fictitious medieval England," Giuliani said. "When Tyrion, who is a very small man, is accused of murder. He didn't commit murder, he can't defend himself, and he hires a champion to defend him."

Tyrion Lannister (Peter Dinklage) twice invoked "trial by combat" in the series, first when on trial at the Eyrie in season one, and then again when on trial at the Red Keep in season four. Given that both trials resulted in a violent sword fight that left a person dead, it's not immediately clear how referring to those sequences makes any of what he said better.

Also: "Documentary"?

Documentary...

Giuliani went on to add that he was actually referring to a trial "between machines" — apparently referring to voting machines that Trump's team has falsely claimed for months were rigged against him'

https://ew.com/tv/ru...s_LtKoDAfSs2nQI

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 15 January 2021 - 06:21 AM

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#1217 User is offline   Macros 

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Posted 15 January 2021 - 07:33 AM

My god that can't be real.
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#1218 User is offline   Traveller 

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Posted 15 January 2021 - 09:47 AM

Trump supporter yesterday..

'Hey we're not stupid! Donald Trump is a genius. That's what the J stands for.'
So that's the story. And what was the real lesson? Don't leave things in the fridge.
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#1219 User is online   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 16 January 2021 - 02:17 AM

'A pillow salesman apparently has some ideas about declaring martial law

[img]https://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-apps/imrs.php?src=https://arc-anglerfish-washpost-prod-washpost.s3.amazonaws.com/public/F3WEZASXOII6XLGFSLJIDGQ4ZM.jpg&w=32[/img]

[...] Lindell is the CEO of the company My Pillow, which, as you might expect, makes pillows. His company advertises heavily on Fox News, often with spots featuring Lindell himself. A major Republican donor, he participated in an event centered on manufacturing early in Trump's administration. Since then, he's returned to the White House regularly and has touted his close relationship with the president. That includes an effort last August to get Trump to endorse a supposed coronavirus treatment in which Lindell had a financial stake. (Trump did not do so.)

[...] Lindell has repeatedly appeared on far-right "news" programs to insist that he has evidence that Trump actually won the election, a claim for which no credible evidence has ever emerged. As recently as Thursday, he posted on his Facebook page a claim that Trump would be president for "4 more years."

[...]
The Washington Post's Jabin Botsford captured an image of the notes Lindell was carrying with him as he went to meet with Trump. Only half of the page can be seen, but even that tells a lot.

"… BE TAKEN IMMEDIATELY TO SAVE THE
...THE CONSTITUTION
...Colon NOW as Acting National Security
...him with getting the evidence of ALL the
...in the election and all information regarding
...using people he knows who already have security
...done massive research on these issues...at Fort Mead [sic]. He is an attorney with cyber-
...expertise and is up to speed on election issues
....Insurrection Act now as a result of the assault on the
...martial law if necessary upon the first hint of any

[STRIKETHROUGH]

...Sidney Powell, Bill Olsen, Kurt Olsen,
...DOD. Move Kash Patel to CIA Acting
....on Foreign Interference in the election. Trigger
...powers. Make clear this is China/Iran
...also used domestic actors. Instruct Frank
...evidence on...the more broad
...likely amount...
...line...evidence"

At the bottom, the text is obscured by Lindell's coffee cup.

[...] Lindell appears to be arguing that, in response to the violence at the Capitol, the president should invoke the Insurrection Act, which would allow him to deploy military resources. The idea of using the military in response to his losing the election has been fairly common, with advocates including former national security adviser Michael Flynn. Some, including Flynn, speculate that the military could somehow call for a new election.

[...] he may be advocating for somehow stalling the transition of power by declaring martial law.

[...] Perhaps in the future, we will find it grimly amusing that a pillow salesman tried to pitch the president's team on a strategy for lying to the public and using the military to subvert the democratic election of his successor.

It is not currently amusing.'

https://www.washingt...ng-martial-law/

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 16 January 2021 - 02:18 AM

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#1220 User is online   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 16 January 2021 - 04:31 AM

Posted Image

[The 'featured snippet' I got on Google was '340 years Social scientist Luke Kemp analyzed dozens of civilizations—which he defined as "a society with agriculture, multiple cities, military dominance in its geographical region and a continuous political structure"—from 3000 B.C. to 600 A.D. and calculated that the average life span of a civilization is close to 340 years.' However, when I searched for 'How long do empires usually last', it was:

'Americans may not think of themselves as an “empire,” but much of the world does. The average age of empires, according to a specialist on the subject, the late Sir John Bagot Glubb, is 250 years. After that, empires always die, often slowly but overwhelmingly from overreaching in the search for power.']
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