DO NOT read down if you don't want to know what happens because i'm going to SPOILERS
SPOILERS
SPOILERS STAB YOU IN THE BRAIN WITH AN OILY L'IZARD CHE'NITALS SPOILERS
SPOILERS...
...and you have been warned.
Look, i'm a fan. I can't pretend otherwise. I've enjoyed everything SE has ever written, and thus, i am the target this book was aimed at. No one coming in for the first time was going to 'get' this, and people with luckwarm feelings after RG or TtH weren't likely to come back around to the love they felt six or so years ago after putting down MoI for the first time.
But for those of us who have been neck-deep in the Malazan series and loving it, this book was awesome, imnsho.
Steve even says in the foreword that the novel narrative is two books long, so this book was, for the most part, pure set-up. And i'm set. i am SO set. I haven't been this well set up since that time with those brazilian exchange students...
Unlike even TtH, the entire book more or less builds to the finale. There are many 'moments', many many many, actually, but unlike TtH that had the attack on Krul's Bar by example as an action piece to break things up leading to the big finish, here there is no major ka-boom before the finish. Even the big battle about halfway in the book - the Akrynni v the Barghast, notably, don't go huge but ended in almost a whimper. And then the finish was HUGE. Again, anyone who hated the Marines storyline in RG wasn't going to love this, but if you did, damn...
SO LET'S START WITH THE ENDING...
Even if one hadn't read Pat's review, it was abundantly clear that the book was building to 'something' and that the big ugly something was not going to happen all the way over in Kolanse. Even so, a Nahruk army marching out of the Imperial warren and the Bonehunters just having the crap luck to be caught in the way was painful and logical all at once. It SEEMED random, but i don't believe it for a second. Too many Powers have been in play for that to be a coincidence. Plus it bloodied the Nah'ruk and gave Stormy and Gesler's K'chain Che'malle army (inner fan boy moment of giddyness at typing that) enough time to be ready for the battle.
But that played out so perfect. From Fiddler figuring out what was happening and shouting orders to Sort following his lead... from Keneb wasting his life to Lostara breaking out the Shadow Dance... Quick Ben taking down three entire 'Furies' on his own... with ACORNS!... Hedge's Bridgeburners (there's that giddy feeling again) attack/play dead/attack... Bottle bringing down the Nah'Ruk's own wyval on them... Koryk pulling his shit together and Smiles jumping in to save him... Tarr and Urb dragging the marines back into the fight... the Khundryl's suicidal charge... Brys throwing the Letherii army into the fight... and of course 'HAIL THE MARINES!'... it was the Bonehunters moment we've been waiting for since HoC. A human army, up against a technologically (lasers! sort of...) and numerically (i lost it when someone said 40,000 Nah'ruk) and physically (one of these guys fought Karsa) superior foe, and they do what we've seen them do best... take the hit, plant their feet and push back. I have no doubt that in TCG we're going to see a leaner, harder Bonehunters from the (probably relatively few) survivors.
BEST 'DID THAT JUST HAPPEN' MOMENT: Split between Torrent backhanding Olar Ethil (seriously... the guy just pimp smacked an Elder God) and Mother Dark responding to Withal outside the Andii city (he's bitching and the creator of the frikkin universe responds - yeah no kidding he doesn't want to move).
BEST CHARACTER I THOUGHT WAS GOING TO BE ANOTHER MHYBE BUT WASN'T: Kalyth. hands down, in the prologue i was so sure the KC Destriant was going to become one of those characters who exists to whine and complain over the agony of life... but SE turned her around... her 'dreams' and then when she stood up to the Shi'gal to protect Sag'Churok.
BEST LAY THE SMACK DOWN THAT WASN'T IN THE FINALE MOMENT: The Watch taking out a Forkrul Assail and five Liosan all by himself. Oh yeah, this guy's a badass.
BEST SE YOU'RE MESSING WITH US MOMENT: The repeated suggestions that the army 'worships' Fiddler. Yeah, Dessembrae got his start the same way...
BEST ALL HOPE IS LOST OH WAIT NO IT ISN'T MOMENT: Badalle turning around and Mokra frying four Forkrul Assail with her poetry. Y'know, since i read 'Memory Sorrow and Thorn' i've pretty much had an allergic reaction any time a fantasy author breaks out the trope of people fighting each other with song and poetry, but Badalle's entire plot line, the sheer viscious bleakness of the Snake and the way she worked with it, turned this into something that was just perfect.
BEST CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT: Dead Hedge assembling his own command of sappers out of Letherii rejects and prostitutes, recruiting his own alchemist, and calling them 'Bridgeburners'. This was so funny and just 'right' i got a big silly grin every time they appeared. In the finale, the whole "We are getting in there and supporting Quick Ben!!!" *things 'splode* "Change of plan, everyone get their heads down and play dead!!! Now THROW MUNITIONS AND RUN THE FUCK AWAY!!!" thing was awesome and funny and possibly a Monty Python reference...
As an aside, Fiddler and Hedge's interactions about Hedge being 'dead but got better' were very well done.
MOST PAINFUL STORYLINE: I want to mean that in a good way, but honestly the entire Tool/Hetan/Cafal/Whiteface thing was so... bleak. I understood the symbolism, but even so Tool sacrificing himself to save a hundred or so of his worse enemies from another political enemy was just... frustrating. And Hetan... this woman faced undead K'Chain Che'malle and sex with Kruppe in MoI and laughed... the way she retreated into mourning and was taken out by her rivals was just... weak... too weak for what was a strong, fun supporting character. And Stahl leading his Saran away from battle only to decide to attack the Malazans and then Tool and his new Imass show up and wipe them out was just the bleak end to a bleak storyline. I really wish SE had thrown in the hint that somehow the Elder Gods or the Chained God were behind all this because otherwise it was just bad things happening for the sake of showing bad things happening and i wanted it to be more than that.
BEST CHARACTER NON-DEVELOPMENT: Ublala Pung, ESPECIALLY when he was hanging out with Draconus. Despite all the panic that Drac's return seemed to spark, i could not read their interactions and not think that after everything, including wiping out two entire armies just by showing up, Draconus just isn't all that bad a guy. Who kills crazy old women with his hands.
BEST NOD TO THE FANS: Skanarow to Kindly about Gudd: "His timeline doesn't make sense.' (more or less)
![Posted Image](http://forum.malazanempire.com/public/style_emoticons/default/smile.gif)
BEST OKAY NOW WE HAVE THAT MYSTERY SOLVED MOMENT: The Forkrul Assail have a warren. And it's at the heart of the problem. Also, the last page or so when Hood returned.
BEST SE GIVETH AND SE TAKETH AWAY MOMENT: Telorast and Curdle are WHAT??? They can DO that???
BEST (mostly) NEW CHARACTER I WANT TO SEE MORE OF OH WAIT CRAP HE'S DEAD: Ruthan Gudd. He was stuck in an Azath. He hung out with Greymane. He planned on killing Draconus or being killed by him in the sense that either outcome was possible. He's not a Stormrider but he plays one on TV. He made the sex with Shurq. Who IS THIS GUY??? Tho his 'noble sacrifice' seemed to come out of nowhere at the end. he had inner monologue'd more than once that the army was just a place to hide out, so his sudden ride into the face of 40,000 Nahruk for the purpose of showing the army just how outmatched they were was somewhat random, as was Keneb, who had never interacted with him in any serious way before, running out to get 'sploded with him. I'm wondering if maybe will see him again. (Gudd, not Keneb who was clearly Ranalled out of existance.)
BEST UNINTENTIONAL OR WAS IT STORYLINE PARALLEL: The Shake and the Snake. Two groups walking through wastelands ending up in deserted cities of Dark and Light. Interesting. Relatedly, these were both surprisingly readable despite being basically long travelogues of angst and suffering. The Snake especially was eerie - the Chain of Dogs comparison is obvious but about the time when 4000 kids go cannibal to stay alive one gets the sense SE is up to something more complex with this one. I kept expecting the Snake to link up with one of the other storylines and tho it never did, i was totally fine with that.
BEST RETURN (AGAIN): Whiskeyjack and the Bridgeburners replacing Hood. Now THAT'S cool.
I'M CALLING IT NOW: releasing the Otataral Dragon is related to Tiam's return. You read it here first. I was right about Redmask, so doubt me at your peril.
I WANTED TO SEE MORE!!!: Gruntle and co vs the Shi'gal. Cartographer wasn't the only one who was sorry he missed out on that. See also the final 14 Jaghut vs the Nahruk.
I'LL HAVE TO GET BACK TO YOU: On the whole Icarium thing. I just finished the book at 3am and i need to digest that a bit and possibly re-read key parts.
WHY THIS BOOK WAS AMAZING: This book had it all. Think about it... Malazans, Letherii, gods elder and new, dragons, Imass dead and alive, Jaghut, Forkrul Assail, K'chain E'verything, Icarium, Mappo, the Perish, political intrigue, shapeshifters, clashing armies, a tarthenal with a huge shlong... okay, fine, we didn't see Paran and the Host or Shadowthrone and Cotillion but consider the scope of the series and just how much SE logically worked into this book and its just staggering... and THAT'S JUST TO SET UP THE FINALE. I'm still hooked.
- Abyss, ...to be continued...