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Spoilers for Mafia 45

#1 User is offline   Path-Shaper 

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Posted 03 May 2009 - 04:33 PM

Passwords:

Spoiler Heaven: morgothislazy
Path-Shaper: narrator

Alts:
Emurlahn - aqua
Tennes - blue
Meanas - brown
Telas - black
Liosan - cyan
Korvalain -green
Gamelon - gold
D'riss - gray
Hood's Path - indigo
Kessobahn - magenta
Korlat - orange
Silanah - pink
Rashan - purple
Ruse - red
Fener - scarlet
Tellan - silver
Ampelas - violet
Mockra - white
Omtose - yellow
Shadow - copper
Serc - brass
Anomandaris - bronze
Galain - teal
Barghast - lilac


Roles:
Evil
Prince Humperdink - Korlat - Vengeance
Count Rugen - Serc - PeanutButta
The Albino - Fener - HoosierDaddy
Vizzini - Galain - Jump Around
Yellin - Omtose - Yellow

Inno
Miracle Max - Shadow - Kurt M
Valerie - Anomandaris - bwgan
Fezzik - Gamelon - drinksinbars
Inigo Montoya - Emurlahn - Sir Thursday
King - Tennes - todarresteck
Queen - Rashan - Stalker
Westley - Ampelas - Gem
Princess Buttercup - Tellan - Malaese.

Innos
Meanas - Khellendros - NKed night 1
Telas - Morgoth45 - NKed night 1
Liosan - Imperion
Korvalain - Bent
Hood's Path - Dktorede
Kessobahn - Mentallist
Silanah - Lisheo
Barghast - Masterblue
Mockra - Silencer
Ruse - Shinrei
D'riss - Sixty - lynched day 1

This post has been edited by Path-Shaper: 06 May 2009 - 08:06 AM

Only someone with this much power could make this many frittatas without breaking any eggs.
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#2 User is offline   Path-Shaper 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 06:00 AM

Role distrubution:
Evil
Killer 1 -
You are Prince Humperdink, and your trying to rule the world. However your not even King, haven't managed to kill your bride and can't start a war. Its time to clean house, become King and rule the world. You along with your good friend Count Rugen (xxxxx) and assisted by his Albino servant (xxxxx) intend to do just that.
You may talk to each other at all times, and between the three of you get 2 kills. If however one of you is guarded or dies then you will only get 1 kill.

Killer 2 -
You are the six fingered man Count Rugen. You love pain its your lifes work, however your good friend Prince Humperdink (xxxx) needs your help. He's starting a war with Guildor and needs a masscare to do it, and get rid of some pesky trouble makers. Its a lot of work so you have your Albino (xxxxx) to help out, someone needs to take care of the bodies and do all the hard work.
You may talk to each other at all times, and between the three of you get 2 kills. If however one of you is guarded or dies then you will only get 1 kill.

Killer 3 -
Albino. You are Count Rugen's (xxxx) assistant and there's a bunch of killing to be done with him and Prince Humperdink (xxxx). Someone needs to do the lifting moving, setting up the bodies to make it look like Guildor and even do the dirty work of killing, and your that kind of Albino.
You may talk to each other at all times, and between the three of you get 2 kills. If however one of you is guarded or dies then you will only get 1 kill.

Evil Guard/Symp
Yellin -You are Princes chief spymaster and guard. Your not going to put your life on the line but you'll help out when you can.
You know Prince Humperdink (xxxx) is working with Count Rugen (xxxxx) and The Albino (xxxx) but your not going to kill for him. However every night you can pick one person and that person will be guarded by your men.

Symp
Vizzini - Your back in town, having built up an immunity to iocaine poweder really was a life saver. Your hear the Prince is still trying to start a war and he's the one paying. You don't have anyone to do the dirty work and your not getting your hands bloodied but you'll do what you can. You know Prince Humperdink (xxxx) is working with Count Rugen (xxxxx) and The Albino (xxxx) but your not going to kill for him.

Inno

Fezzik (BP/Guard), you are the biggest and strongest you don't even exercise. You haven't started that war with Guildor yet and you bet the Prince is annoyed, better him dead than you.

You have a one shot BP, your just too big to be kiilled in one attack. Also every night you can choose someone to stand next to and that person is Guarded. You are a member of the town.

Inigo Montoya (2 Shot Vig).
Westley wasn't the only person with a pill from Miracle Max. The Six Fingered Man, Count Rugen is still alive apparently and they're going to be wanting to get you. However your still one of the greatest swordsman alive.

You get 2 Night time Vig attempts. You are a member of the town.

Miracle Max ( Paired Healer).
You wish they had killed the Prince and company, whose else brings people back from the down other than Miracle Max? Now he's going to want you dead.
You and your wife Valerie (xxxx) can make one pill a day and each night can PM one name in and that person will be Healed.
You can talk to your wife at all times. You are a member of the town.

Valerie (Paired Healer)
You wish they had killed the Prince and company, whose else brings people back from the down other than Miracle Max? Now he's going to want you dead.
You and your husband Max (xxxx) can make one pill a day and each night can PM one name in and that person will be Healed.
You can talk to your husband at all times. You are a member of the town.

King.
You are the doddery old King. Your mind isn't what it once was, but after that wedding that was too much. And you hear he now wants to be called King Humperdink. Well it will be over your dead body, its just a pity no one listens to you any more outside your loving wife the Queen (xxxx).
You can talk to her at all times and are a member of the town.

Queen.
That pesky son of yours has gone too far that wedding was too strange. Now you hear he wants to be King and have a new Queen. Its too much even for you. You have no influence any more at Court but at least your husband the King (xxxx) will listen to you.
You can talk to him at all times and are a member of the town.

Westley/The Dread Pirate Roberts
Getting into the castle was the easy part, you wish it was to the death now. Still you have Princess Butterup (xxxxx) and thats whats important. The Prince is after you now, but you have to protect Buttercup as well. Best to merge in with the population and see him hanged.

You and Buttercup can talk at all times. Also you have a shared BP between you for one Night. If Buttercup is NKed then you will get revenge and get One any time Vig that won't end the day. You know Buttercup is delicate and if you were killed by Humperdink and co then she will give up living and kill herself. You are a member of the town.

Princess Buttercup.
Being rescued was only part of it now you have to escape. Westley suggests hiding out as a town person as rumours have got out and they want him hanged!

You and Westley (xxxx) can talk at all times. Westley will protect you and so between you have a shared BP for one Night. If Westley however is NKed you just couldn't bear it any more and will kill yourself. You are a member of the town.

The rest, roleless innos.
You are all poor innocents caught up in the mess, rumour is Prince Humperdink needs some bodies to frame up Guildor for a war he wants to start and yours might be it. Its time to remove that Prince and have the nice old King back in power.
You are town and win when the scum are eliminated.

This post has been edited by Path-Shaper: 04 May 2009 - 07:59 AM

Only someone with this much power could make this many frittatas without breaking any eggs.
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#3 User is offline   alt146 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 08:05 AM

Manager password is inigo. Editted the times, wont add players until you've done the draw.

Game looks cool - innos are heavily roled, but 3 killers plus two symps should help offset that. Lack of finders will definitely make things interesting. Symp guard doesnt have all that much to do though. Two sets of paired players is also a big plus for the innos, making one of them suicidal does balance that out a little.

One question - how do you decide which of the two kills goes through in the case of death or guarding? I would give one to Rugen and the albino, the other to Humperdink. If any of them are guarded or die, their associated kill doesnt go through,
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#4 User is offline   Path-Shaper 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 08:17 AM

There's actually 3 sets of paired players. The Healers, Westley/Buttercup and the King/Queen. But there's not a lot of useful roles out there outside them, especially if Inigo dies, those 2 Vigs are handy but he can easily kill an Inno.

Also the Evil Guard is still a symp of course. But he can stop the opposition Guard, one of the Healers when one dies or either Vig, so plenty of opportunity to be useful.

With a CF they shouldn't need Finders, we really should be playing CF or no CF but Finders.

For the kills I was just going to have them list 2 kills, and the second kill won't go.
Maybe not a bad idea though might just do what you suggested, will add it to the role PM me thinks.
Only someone with this much power could make this many frittatas without breaking any eggs.
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#5 User is offline   alt146 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 08:17 AM

Also, I can do the draw if you like? Although I wont have time to send out any PMs, got a meeting in 45min, dunno if I'll be done by the time the game starts.
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#6 User is offline   alt146 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 08:21 AM

View PostPath-Shaper, on May 4 2009, 10:17 AM, said:

There's actually 3 sets of paired players. The Healers, Westley/Buttercup and the King/Queen. But there's not a lot of useful roles out there outside them, especially if Inigo dies, those 2 Vigs are handy but he can easily kill an Inno.

Also the Evil Guard is still a symp of course. But he can stop the opposition Guard, one of the Healers when one dies or either Vig, so plenty of opportunity to be useful.

With a CF they shouldn't need Finders, we really should be playing CF or no CF but Finders.

For the kills I was just going to have them list 2 kills, and the second kill won't go.
Maybe not a bad idea though might just do what you suggested, will add it to the role PM me thinks.


Yeah, I see now there are three. Makes it easy to CI two or three players if they survive late game, the killers will have to try get rid of them fairly early. Otherwise everything looks good. Lots of potential vigs, which I always think makes a game interesting :p
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#7 User is offline   Path-Shaper 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 08:26 AM

I was going to wait till an hour before game start before doing the draw just in case we have a late addition. Surprised not to see a JA around, I recall something about him travelling. If you've got 45 minutes to kill and want something to do, feel free to do a Draw now, if someone does join I'll just redo it.
Only someone with this much power could make this many frittatas without breaking any eggs.
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#8 User is offline   alt146 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 08:29 AM

View PostPath-Shaper, on May 4 2009, 10:26 AM, said:

I was going to wait till an hour before game start before doing the draw just in case we have a late addition. Surprised not to see a JA around, I recall something about him travelling. If you've got 45 minutes to kill and want something to do, feel free to do a Draw now, if someone does join I'll just redo it.


Hmm, think I'll leave it to you. Dont want to get half way through and then dont have time to finish. Hopefully I'll be around a little later, help you out a little then.
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#9 User is offline   Tapper 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 09:41 AM

View PostPath-Shaper, on May 4 2009, 10:26 AM, said:

I was going to wait till an hour before game start before doing the draw just in case we have a late addition. Surprised not to see a JA around, I recall something about him travelling. If you've got 45 minutes to kill and want something to do, feel free to do a Draw now, if someone does join I'll just redo it.

JA was in Canada, so if the Hotel doesn't have web access or his wife wants him to do something other than rush to an internet cafe six times a day, not playing may be his only option...

Any word from dibs? Or am I losing my eye sight and he's on the list?
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#10 User is offline   Path-Shaper 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 09:53 AM

Rushing to a internet cafe 6 times a day is how it normally use to work :p
I recall Ment doing something similiar...

Dibs is on the list, I cunningly put him down as drinksinbars, or its your sight.
Any ideas for an opening scene? I'm relying on you, I got nothing at the moment :p

Will be back in a couple hours to do the draw send the PM's and it'll be all go.
Only someone with this much power could make this many frittatas without breaking any eggs.
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#11 User is offline   Tapper 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 10:13 AM

View PostPath-Shaper, on May 4 2009, 11:53 AM, said:

Rushing to a internet cafe 6 times a day is how it normally use to work :p
I recall Ment doing something similiar...

Dibs is on the list, I cunningly put him down as drinksinbars, or its your sight.
Any ideas for an opening scene? I'm relying on you, I got nothing at the moment :p

Will be back in a couple hours to do the draw send the PM's and it'll be all go.

Something with the narrator - I'll put a scene up here for you to review - lunch break in 45 min, so you'll have it in 60 :p
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Posted 04 May 2009 - 11:21 AM

Tried to emulate the writing style, man, it's tough. Anyway, here goes. Starts of with the grandpa-grandson, then goes on to where the PB finished. Had to revive Rugen and Vizzini, but I think it matches - not too satisfied about the end... I like the 'she kissed me' punchline for the King but it isn't delivered well.

Quote

“But grandpa, if Westley and the Princess and Inigo and Fezzik escaped, what happened to the Prince and the King and the Queen?”

“That is in a different book, my boy. One that exists only in our heads. It is a story we can tell together. Where do you think we should start?”
“Prince Humperdinck wanted war, did he not?”
“A border war with Guilder, yes.”
“And do you think Westley and Buttercup and Fezzik and Inigo would try to stop them?”
“It would be a short story otherwise, wouldn’t it?”
“I think we should start there. And this time, it will be bloody.”

--- Rugen’s secret hide-out under the oak ---

Ten thousand volts cruised through the body of the Count, jolting him from left to right, forcing his eyes open, arcing his back, spreading his eleven fingers wide. With a scream, he sat up.

“Perfect,” Humperdinck said. “Vizzini, you truly are a visionary, guessing that Rugen’s machine could be used to revive as well as torture and kill.”
“That is what you pay me for, my prince, that and the fact that Sicilians are prepared for everything, even iocane poisoning. It seemed logical that if you can pump life out of a man, you can pump it back in,” the Sicilian said, grimace revealing stained teeth. “What is it you want me to do?”
“It is time for our country to be ruled by a man of ambition. I want you to round up my parents and sent them on a tour of the town. Make sure they get lost somewhere along the way, the two old fools should not be able to find their way back. Send some men with them, make sure they are properly silenced. If my bride cannot die for our war with Guilder, then my parents can.
When you are certain of their demise, organize me a crowning. In the meantime, I will plan the war with Rugen here, he seems recovered enough to discuss the upcoming carnage.”

--- That same evening, somewhere on the streets of the village ---

“Isn’t that Miracle Max, our wonder worker?” The Queen asked, squinting.
“He’s not close enough for me to see,” the King said, straining his near sighted eyes.
“It is him,” the Queen insisted.
“Maybe,” the King offered.
“Enough of that, dear, let’s go and see him, he can take us back to the castle,” the Queen said.
“I’m not that energetic anymore, darling,” the King complained.
“I’m sure he’ll have a pill for that, sweetie,” the Queen shushed. “Now, after him!”

--- a short while later, in the house of Miracle Max ---

“What do you mean, cannot take us back?” the Queen asked.
“Your son says you are dead, killed by assassins from Guilder, just as you were returning from your inspection of the town,” Max’ wife said.
“So this is all a misunderstanding?” the King tried.
“No, no, he has arranged a crowning, and said he will get revenge. I suspect this is all his doing!” Max’ wife replied.
“That naughty boy!” the Queen said, outraged. “Someone needs to smack his bottom!”
“We can’t do it,” the King whispered. “ But what about that nice young lady and her man in black? They did it once, didn’t they?”
“They are gone,” the Queen cried.
“Can you work a Miracle, Max?” Max’ wife asked.
“It will be difficult,” he said.
“Please try,” the King said.
"I will," Max grumbled. "Just don't hurry the miracle man. Don't hurry Max."
"Why them? Why not ask the villagers to help us?" the Queen asked.
“She kissed me.” the King offered, sheepishly.

This post has been edited by Tapper: 04 May 2009 - 12:40 PM

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 12:58 PM

Ok the draw:
Evil
Prince Humperdink - Korlat - Vengeance
Count Rugen - Serc - PeanutButta
The Albino - Fener - HoosierDaddy
Vizzini - Galain - Jump Around
Yellin - Omtose - Yellow

Inno
Miracle Max - Shadow - Kurt M
Valerie - Anomandaris - bwgan
Fezzik - Gamelon - drinksinbars
Inigo Montoya - Emurlahn - Sir Thursday
King - Tennes - todarresteck
Queen - Rashan - Stalker
Westley - Ampelas - Gem
Princess Buttercup - Tellan - Malaese.

Innos
Meanas - Khellendros
Telas - Morgoth45
Liosan - Imperion
Korvalain - Bent
Hood's Path - Dktorede
Kessobahn - Mentallist
Silanah - Lisheo
Barghast - Masterblue
Mockra - Silencer
Ruse - Shinrei
D'riss - Sixty


Day 1:

Right now action wise we have.
Killers:
Provisional 1 (Humperdink) -- Kill Telas, if lynched, kill Omtose
Provisional 2 (Rugen/Albino) -- Kill Menas, if lynched kill Barghast

Healers: Korvalain
Evil Guard: Korvalain
Inno Guard: Nothing
Vig: Nothing

This post has been edited by Path-Shaper: 05 May 2009 - 09:46 PM

Only someone with this much power could make this many frittatas without breaking any eggs.
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#14 User is offline   Tapper 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 01:10 PM

I like the division - and HD is a killer yet again, once more together with Vengeance :p
Dibs with a bullet proof :rollseyes:
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Posted 04 May 2009 - 01:20 PM

Yup sent out the role PM's, about to do the scene and rules, then i'll send out alts and its Game on :p
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#16 User is offline   Path-Shaper 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 01:54 PM

Tapper here, posting some PMs:

Galain:

Quote

Quote

Vizzini (Symp) - Your back in town, having built up an immunity to iocaine powder really was a life saver. Your hear the Prince is still trying to start a war and he's the one paying. You don't have anyone to do the dirty work and your not getting your hands bloodied but you'll do what you can. You know Prince Humperdink (Korlat) is working with Count Rugen (Serc) and The Albino (Fener) but your not going to kill for him.


...

*cries of happiness*


Korlat - venge:

Quote

Quote

You are Prince Humperdink, and your trying to rule the world. However your not even King, haven't managed to kill your bride and can't start a war. Its time to clean house, become King and rule the world. You along with your good friend Count Rugen (Serc) and assisted by his Albino servant (Fener) intend to do just that.

You may talk to each other at all times, and between the three of you get 2 kills. If however one of you is guarded or dies then you will only get 1 kill.


Seriously....Fucking awsome.... Second straight game as a evil scum killer.


STD-Emur:

Quote

Quote

Inigo Montoya (2 Shot Vig).
Westley wasn't the only person with a pill from Miracle Max. The Six Fingered Man, Count Rugen is still alive apparently and they're going to be wanting to get you. However your still one of the greatest swordsman alive.

You get 2 Night time Vig attempts. You are a member of the town.


Oooh, interesting. Never had a vig role before. Guess I'm going to have to be looking for scum early. I shall be scrutinizing mid-level posters to start with, I think. Can't act until I have some info though, so I guess I'd better make myself look innocuous...


Sir Thursday


Venge to his fellow murderers... titled: hello my minions

Quote

Serc, you know how much I love watching you work, but I've got my country's 500th anniversary to plan, my wedding to arrange, my wife to murder and Guilder to frame for it; I'm swamped....


:p


I am Vengeance....

Lets stratigize shall we.

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#17 User is offline   Path-Shaper 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 01:57 PM

more Galain:

Quote

Quote

Vizzini (Symp) - Your back in town, having built up an immunity to iocaine powder really was a life saver. Your hear the Prince is still trying to start a war and he's the one paying. You don't have anyone to do the dirty work and your not getting your hands bloodied but you'll do what you can. You know Prince Humperdink (Korlat) is working with Count Rugen (Serc) and The Albino (Fener) but your not going to kill for him.


Before I make any plans, could you precise if this game is a finder or a CF game? Or both, which I hope not, but that's personnal :p

I also believe that the 0 hours nights is a bit of a stretch, but I won't complain since it works against town more than scum. Killers always have a kill in, and don't really need to evaluate their choice based on the lynch's CF (assuming there is one)


Omtose has a role yet is unhappy?

Quote

Quote

Yellin (Symp Guard) -You are Princes chief spymaster and guard. Your not going to put your life on the line but you'll help out when you can.

You know Prince Humperdink (Korlat) is working with Count Rugen (Serc) and The Albino (Fener) but your not going to kill for him. However every night you can pick one person and that person will be guarded by your men.


Blarg.


Omtose:

Quote

Guard Emurlahn.

Now I need to go read up about the Princess Bride on wiki. Haven't seen that film for about ten years.


Ruse:

Quote

Quote

You are all poor innocents caught up in the mess, rumour is Prince Humperdink needs some bodies to frame up Guildor for a war he wants to start and yours might be it. Its time to remove that Prince and have the nice old King back in power.
You are town and win when the scum are eliminated.



RI, eh. That's ok I guess, although I was hoping for ROUS so I could do a lot of hissing at random.


Galain again:

Quote

Quote

Quote

Quote

Vizzini (Symp) - Your back in town, having built up an immunity to iocaine powder really was a life saver. Your hear the Prince is still trying to start a war and he's the one paying. You don't have anyone to do the dirty work and your not getting your hands bloodied but you'll do what you can. You know Prince Humperdink (Korlat) is working with Count Rugen (Serc) and The Albino (Fener) but your not going to kill for him.


Before I make any plans, could you precise if this game is a finder or a CF game? Or both, which I hope not, but that's personnal :p

I also believe that the 0 hours nights is a bit of a stretch, but I won't complain since it works against town more than scum. Killers always have a kill in, and don't really need to evaluate their choice based on the lynch's CF (assuming there is one)


I edited the starting post. Its a full CF game.

0 hour nights are a stretch, but there's not a huge amount of roles. I'm letting people put in a provisional If this person is lynched then do this etc..


Then I suggest letting them say "If X is lynched and inno do this etc...". Anyways, that's not my team.

Well, 24 players is big. 3 killers would mean that if there's another symp than me, it's one maximum. I don't think there could be 6 scums.

It also means it's a marathon, so I won't start the disruptive symp activity just yet, there's no point getting lynched so early. Unless there's a panic situation, but if a killer gets in trouble early, it will be hard to decide whether to go all out to save him. With the CF, if I fail I could be next. That also goes for the three killers, I hope there's some experience in there.

So, my biggest ennemy is the NKs, but I'll see if I can send the signals. And if the end game comes nearer and I'm still alive, I'll try something funny. I just have to think about it a bit :p

Only someone with this much power could make this many frittatas without breaking any eggs.
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Posted 04 May 2009 - 02:10 PM

D'riss:

Quote

Quote

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You are all poor innocents caught up in the mess, rumour is Prince Humperdink needs some bodies to frame up Guildor for a war he wants to start and yours might be it. Its time to remove that Prince and have the nice old King back in power.
You are town and win when the scum are eliminated.

Argh!
Worst part of Meat n' potatoes--way too many RI's imo.
That's what's great about mindfucks. They may be really damn confusing, but at least you're guaranteed a neat role.
Oh well, onto my 3rd or 4th RI game in a row. Probably going to get bored and just fuck around later, but meh. Very disappointed by my appalling luck with draws. :S



Sorry man, twas random from the hat. Feel free to try something new, go aggresive early on etc and see how people react. If your RI its always nice to try stuff.. perhaps coming up with a plan to find scum even? :p

Yeah, I could...
Last time I tried being aggressive it got me NKed and I ended up watching from the sidelines for the rest of the game. Not sure how I want to try playing this time. I've never been very good at fishing for reactions...hell, I'm not very good at mafia in general lol.


JAlain:

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Vizzini (Symp) - Your back in town, having built up an immunity to iocaine powder really was a life saver. Your hear the Prince is still trying to start a war and he's the one paying. You don't have anyone to do the dirty work and your not getting your hands bloodied but you'll do what you can. You know Prince Humperdink (Korlat) is working with Count Rugen (Serc) and The Albino (Fener) but your not going to kill for him.


Will the CF include the movie name of the player? My game will be much different if I CF inno than if I CF Vizzini.

I don't want to end up like that Coltaine game. I managed to confused people even though I was Mallick fucking Rel upon CF, but that was unpleasant :p

Only someone with this much power could make this many frittatas without breaking any eggs.
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#19 User is offline   Path-Shaper 

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Posted 04 May 2009 - 02:12 PM

Tellan sounding his partner:

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Princess Buttercup.
Being rescued was only part of it now you have to escape. Westley suggests hiding out as a town person as rumours have got out and they want him hanged!

You and Westley (Ampelas) can talk at all times. Westley will protect you and so between you have a shared BP for one Night. If Westley however is NKed you just couldn't bear it any more and will kill yourself. You are a member of the town.


Who wants to touch my perfect breasts? There's a shortage in the world you know....

Only someone with this much power could make this many frittatas without breaking any eggs.
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#20 User is offline   Path-Shaper 

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  • Posts: 1,255
  • Joined: 01-October 08

Posted 04 May 2009 - 02:13 PM

Malaese talking to his partner (Ampelas, Gem?)

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Hi honey...I can't help but wonder why you didn't kill the Prince when you had the chance...I know you thought "well there will be a sequel" and we will all get paid and make a career out of it, then that little snot nosed kid went on to do the Wonder Years and it's all about Winnie Copper this... Winnie that. I think I saw Vizzini and Rugen running around too, so you are just an all around failure it seems. Some farm hand turned pirate you are. I suppose you are my true love though and our movie has helped tons of dudes get laid....and I have perfect breasts so I got that going for me.

Malaese

Only someone with this much power could make this many frittatas without breaking any eggs.
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