Malazan Empire: The corrupt a wish game. - Malazan Empire

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The corrupt a wish game.

#601 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 02:51 PM

Granted. You brought sexy back. Unfortunately you also brought seriously unsexy front, top and bottom, so the whole thing fails. Plus herpes.

I wish for a major Hollywood movie featured weaponzied evil criminal mastermind sentient chocolate pudding.
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#602 User is offline   Obdigore 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 03:05 PM

Wish granted. 'Nazi PuddingMind' is a stunning success, leading the US to build pudding powered robots that enslave the world and treat all humans (and herpes ridden cats) as serfs in their organic pudding farms.

I wish I had a third monitor at my desk.
Monster Hunter World Iceborne: It's like hunting monsters, but on crack, but the monsters are also on crack.
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#603 User is offline   majomull 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 03:12 PM

You get your third monitor- it turns out to be a monitor lizard and bites off your nose and eats your stapler.

I wish my afternoon meeting was canceled.
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#604 User is offline   sappers rule 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 03:14 PM

it is canceled and moved to 2 am enjoy.






i wish i didnt have to do homework
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#605 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 03:18 PM

I don't even have to grant your wish, because you DON'T have to do homework. Of course, the resulting failure, shame and subsequent career as a street corner crack ho with scorching case of full body herpes is only your own fault.

I wish I could stop making scorching case of herpes jokes in this thread.
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#606 User is offline   Obdigore 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 03:23 PM

Granted, you can stop making herpes jokes, but only because you have moved on to aids humor.

I wish I had stayed home today.
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#607 User is offline   HiddenOne 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 03:25 PM

Your wish is granted, but only because the blistering internet herpes has burst your fingertips and rendered you unable to inject your venereal witticisms into the electron world.

Edit: Curse you, I type too slow!!!


You did stay home today, but it was because your ride was stolen by aliens



I wish I had a shiny new truck

This post has been edited by HiddenOne: 25 August 2011 - 03:27 PM

HiddenOne. You son of a bitch. You slimy, skulking, low-posting scumbag. You knew it would come to this. Roundabout, maybe. Tortuous, certainly. But here we are, you and me again. I started the train on you so many many hours ago, and now I'm going to finish it. Die HO. Die. This is for last time, and this is for this game too. This is for all the people who died to your backstabbing, treacherous, "I sure don't know what's going on around here" filthy lying, deceitful ways. You son of a bitch. Whatever happens, this is justice. For me, this is justice. Vote HiddenOne Finally, I am at peace.
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#608 User is offline   Obdigore 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 03:28 PM

You receive a shiny new truck. It has a bomb in it and explodes the first time you turn it on.

I wish I could wish for an uncorruptable wish while wishing for more wishes with my first wish.
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#609 User is offline   cerveza_fiesta 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 04:17 PM

Your wishing to wish for it takes a very long time. So long in fact that you die before figuring out the perfect wish. herpes. aids.

I wish herpes and aids didn't exist at all.

This post has been edited by cerveza_fiesta: 25 August 2011 - 04:18 PM

........oOOOOOo
......//| | |oO
.....|| | | | O....BEERS!
......\\| | | |
........'-----'
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#610 User is offline   Obdigore 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 04:40 PM

Wish granted. Herpes and Aids no longer exist because humans have all been killed by the new disease, Avian Mad Hurricane Disease.
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#611 User is online   QuickTidal 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 06:55 PM

Did Obi just effectively END the thread?
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#612 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 06:59 PM

View PostQuickTidal, on 25 August 2011 - 06:55 PM, said:

Did Obi just effectively END the thread?


And herpes AND AIDS!

Very impressive.

I wish i could do that.
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#613 User is offline   Coco with marshmallows 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 07:05 PM

View PostAbyss, on 25 August 2011 - 06:59 PM, said:


And herpes AND AIDS!

Very impressive.

I wish i could do that.



You can! unfortunately this singular ability leaves you unable to communicate with other people in any way shape or form. Your first trip to the sexual health clinic is therefore tragically misunderstood as an incredibly perverse attempt to grope unhealthy / sick people.

You are understandably jailed for a long time, and while inside catch an untreatable dose of syphilis.

I wish I hadn't thought of such an evil response so quickly. It worries me.
meh. Link was dead :(
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#614 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 07:12 PM

View PostCocoreturns, on 25 August 2011 - 07:05 PM, said:

...
I wish I hadn't thought of such an evil response so quickly. It worries me.


Granted! And so you didn't, and thus it never happened, and therefore the thread has ceased to exist.


I wish i hadn't inadvertantly just altered reality.
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#615 User is offline   Obdigore 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 07:13 PM

View PostAbyss, on 25 August 2011 - 07:12 PM, said:

Granted! And so you didn't, and thus it never happened, and therefore the thread has ceased to exist.


I wish i hadn't inadvertantly just altered reality.


Your wish is granted. Therefore the thread is still ended but you didn't do it.

I wish upon a star, that this is not one wish too far...
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#616 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 07:51 PM

Granted, but since it's a fairly useless wish, nothing happens and you receive a venereal disease for boring the universe with your drivel.

I wish I could make those emoticons stop jumping around on the right side of this page.
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#617 User is offline   Coco with marshmallows 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 08:15 PM

View PostAbyss, on 25 August 2011 - 07:51 PM, said:

I wish I could make those emoticons stop jumping around on the right side of this page.


Granted!

The forum crashes again.

You utter bastard.

I wish I could afford a better car.
meh. Link was dead :(
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#618 User is offline   Adjutant Stormy~ 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 08:28 PM

Granted! However, the aforementioned car is a new Indian model, and while fresh off the production line, it is several thousand miles away.

I wish I had a 50 gallon drum of delicious beer.
<!--quoteo(post=462161:date=Nov 1 2008, 06:13 PM:name=Aptorian)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Aptorian @ Nov 1 2008, 06:13 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=462161"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->God damn. Mighty drunk. Must ... what is the english movement movement movement for drunk... with out you seemimg drunk?

bla bla bla

Peopleare harrasing me... grrrrrh.

Also people with big noses aren't jews, they're just french

EDIT: We has editted so mucj that5 we're not quite sure... also, leave britney alone.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
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#619 User is offline   Coco with marshmallows 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 08:31 PM

View PostAdjutant Stormy, on 25 August 2011 - 08:28 PM, said:

I wish I had a 50 gallon drum of delicious beer.


Granted. It materialises around you, and you drown.

I wish more people understood the evil of pink unicorns (ref Dag in chat, if you're curious)
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#620 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 25 August 2011 - 08:39 PM

Granted. Everyone now understands the evil of pink unicorns. Since there is no such thing as pink unicorns, no one cares except a few thousand little girls who will cry and require years of therapy to get over the disappointment. I hope you're satisfied you syphallis-ridden jerk.

I wish I could go home now and have a nap.
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