[Gust Hubb]

Stalking Stonny, on 13 March 2013 - 02:31 PM, said:

corv, on 13 March 2013 - 02:00 PM, said:

I wish my dog didn't eat and then vomit feces.

Granted. He now poops vomit.

I wish my last wish had been better wished.

Granted. Still didn't change anything, especially not on this thread .

Abyss, on 13 March 2013 - 02:32 PM, said:

corv, on 13 March 2013 - 02:00 PM, said:

I wish my dog didn't eat and then vomit feces.

Granted. It's called a muzzle.

I wish i could remove that visual from my brain.

Granted, you now have drunk a full liter of vodka in about 1 minute on an empty stomach while shooting up heroin.

(Try cleaning it up and smelling it all the while....I hate dogs)

I wish I had a DOS computer with all the trappings that worked smoothly and had all the beloved games of the 80s-90s.

[Abyss]

corv, on 13 March 2013 - 03:01 PM, said:

I wish I had a DOS computer with all the trappings that worked smoothly and had all the beloved games of the 80s-90s.

Granted. Now how about a nice game of chess? Or perhaps Global Thermonuclear War?

I wish fries.

[Mrs Savagely Wishy Washy]

Abyss, on 13 March 2013 - 03:42 PM, said:

I wish fries.

Granted. You make them yourself, the best fries you've ever had from the best potatoes you can get your greasy hands on and deep-fried to perfection. Sadly, the basket breaks and you have to fish them out of the hot oil with your bare hands one by one. I know where you can get prostetic hands, btw.


I wish I had one more week of holidays without flu, without any other kind of disease, accidents or catastrophes and without getting fired.

[Abyss]

Miss Savagely Wishy Washy, on 14 March 2013 - 09:56 AM, said:

I wish I had one more week of holidays without flu, without any other kind of disease, accidents or catastrophes and without getting fired.

Granted. And followed by a scorching case of syphillis, an unfortunate ice cream truck accident AND a metero strike on your place of dwelling. Fortunately you're still employed. Demoted, reprimanded and shamed, but employed. Whenever you get out of the hospital, that is.

I wish coffee.

[Gust Hubb]

Granted. Much like your fries, it is the bar-none best coffee you have ever.... not tasted. By the time you have spent the decades formulating, growing coffee trees, learning roasting techniques, taking pottery classes, etc you are so damn sick of coffee that your present cup of pure, perfect, homemade caffeinated bliss is suddenly drowned in the foul heave, courtesy of your roiling stomach.

I wish Abyss's sentences started picking up the use of the word "for."

[HiddenOne]

Abyss, on 14 March 2013 - 12:59 PM, said:

Miss Savagely Wishy Washy, on 14 March 2013 - 09:56 AM, said:

I wish I had one more week of holidays without flu, without any other kind of disease, accidents or catastrophes and without getting fired.

For for for forforof forof foror fof ror foroforof fof ror fof rofor for for fo for fo ro for for for fo ror fofroror foroforof rof ro for ror f @@!!! Flr lflro for for FOR OFRFORFORFORFORFOR!!!

For for for for for for.

In fact the Aybyssmal use of "for" takes over your entire forum world until you can no longer use the internet


I wish that I belonged to a secret society of musicians that receives a new piece of equipment to play with each week with no cost

[Abyss]

HiddenOne, on 14 March 2013 - 02:53 PM, said:

I wish that I belonged to a secret society of musicians that receives a new piece of equipment to play with each week with no cost

Granted. Good news, after a full year of kazoos, they switch to triangles!

I wish grammar.

[Mrs Savagely Wishy Washy]

Abyss, on 14 March 2013 - 03:12 PM, said:

I wish grammar.

Granted. 16 tons of grammar drop on top of you. Not enough grammar? Another 5 tons of each subjunctive mood and ablative case follow.

I wish I had brought two of the best brownies ever instead of one only.

[Abyss]

Miss Savagely Wishy Washy, on 19 March 2013 - 04:39 PM, said:

I wish I had brought two of the best brownies ever instead of one only.

Granted. Now you're fat.

I wish i was using a team of sled dogs rather than a taxi later when i venture out in this snowstorm.

[Gust Hubb]

Granted. Unfortunately you get lost, but while you don't make it, your dogs don't starve.

I wish I could be basking in the sun like my dogs are right now while I slave away.

[Ain't_It_Just_]

Granted, but your dogs now attain sinister levels of intelligence at a rapid rate. They steam you to death in a sauna and acquire all your worldly possessions.

I wish that there wasn't so much god-durn criminal procedure to learn.

[Abyss]

Ain, on 20 March 2013 - 01:37 PM, said:

I wish that there wasn't so much god-durn criminal procedure to learn.

Granted. Just show up and improvise. That works for most criminal lawyers.

I wish i was on a beach somewhere, listening to the waves, and being served on demand cold beer and hot tacos.

[Gust Hubb]

Granted. You are instantly transported to a nice sandy dune on Mars, with a radio playing wave sounds and cold beer and hot tacos at your fingertips. Too bad you didn't bring a spacesuit.

I wish I had a faster computer.

[High House Dark]

Granted. Your faster computer takes to calling itself HAL, and won't open the pod bay doors for you. It then kills you in your sleep while moving on to take over the universe and killing everyone you ever knew or loved.

I wish I wasn't so tired and that I had more time to draw (is that 2 wishes? oops? pick one?).

[Ain't_It_Just_]

Abyss, on 20 March 2013 - 01:52 PM, said:

Ain, on 20 March 2013 - 01:37 PM, said:

I wish that there wasn't so much god-durn criminal procedure to learn.

Granted. Just show up and improvise. That works for most criminal lawyers.

I wish i was on a beach somewhere, listening to the waves, and being served on demand cold beer and hot tacos.

That's true. All I have to do is rewatch "I Love You Phillip Morris" and away I go!

Granted, and you don't feel tired. But at this point the leader of your country calls upon you and a group of other unremarkable individuals to form a suburban-type Avengers initiative and the first meeting goes till the next day.

I wish that I could absorb all of my law lectures in a matter of minutes.

[Abyss]

Ain, on 21 March 2013 - 08:45 AM, said:

I wish that I could absorb all of my law lectures in a matter of minutes.

Granted. Just have them transcribed, pulped and mixed with milk so you can chug them down beer bong style. Ain't law school awesome?!?

I wish that i didn't have to share a printer with people who keep walking off with my documents.

[Spoilsport Stonny]

Abyss, on 21 March 2013 - 02:23 PM, said:

Granted. Just have them transcribed, pulped and mixed with milk so you can chug them down beer bong style. Ain't law school awesome?!?

I wish that i didn't have to share a printer with people who keep walking off with my documents.

Granted. You've been provided with a spankin new 3D printer, but you waste all your time printing out the pieces of your own Stillsuit.

I wish that taco place was a lot closer to my job. They make the best tacos.

[Abyss]

Stalking Stonny, on 21 March 2013 - 02:30 PM, said:

I wish that taco place was a lot closer to my job. They make the best tacos.

Granted. You're fired. Now you can loiter near the taco place begging for change to buy tacos.

I wish I had a bacon taco. Or three. Three bacon tacos would be good.

[Minterlint]

Abyss, on 21 March 2013 - 02:39 PM, said:

Granted. You're fired. Now you can loiter near the taco place begging for change to buy tacos.

I wish I had a bacon taco. Or three. Three bacon tacos would be good.

Granted. But it's Canadian bacon so it doesn't count.

I wish for anything in politics to make sense.

[Abyss]

Minterlint, on 21 March 2013 - 02:46 PM, said:

Abyss, on 21 March 2013 - 02:39 PM, said:

Granted. You're fired. Now you can loiter near the taco place begging for change to buy tacos.

I wish I had a bacon taco. Or three. Three bacon tacos would be good.

Granted. But it's Canadian bacon so it doesn't count.

I wish for anything in politics to make sense.

Granted. First thing tomorrow am your local politicians will campaign heavily to pass a law that designates Canadian Bacon as 'real' bacon and that other stuff as 'other bacon', and this makes perfect sense to you as it is punishment for daring to besmirch Canadian anything, much less bacon.

I wish i had three Canadian Bacon tacos. AND three other bacon tacos. And nachos would be good too. Also, beer.