Malazan Empire: 1 Word Story: lets write an EPIC! - Malazan Empire

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1 Word Story: lets write an EPIC!

#561 User is offline   D'rek 

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Posted 19 January 2009 - 10:51 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards

View Postworrywort, on 14 September 2012 - 08:07 PM, said:

I kinda love it when D'rek unleashes her nerd wrath, as I knew she would here. Sorry innocent bystanders, but someone's gotta be the kindling.
0

#562 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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Posted 19 January 2009 - 11:31 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae
souls are for wimps
0

#563 User is offline   no_survivors 

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Posted 20 January 2009 - 12:52 AM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with
See ten thousand ministries, See the holy rightous dogs.
They claim to heal, but all they do is steal, Abuse your faith, cheat, and rob.
~ God was Never on your Side, Lemmy Kilmister
0

#564 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

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Posted 20 January 2009 - 09:44 AM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


0

#565 User is offline   no_survivors 

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  • Location:Canada/US (seasonal)
  • Interests:Cats, reading, guitar and cats

Posted 20 January 2009 - 08:05 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.
See ten thousand ministries, See the holy rightous dogs.
They claim to heal, but all they do is steal, Abuse your faith, cheat, and rob.
~ God was Never on your Side, Lemmy Kilmister
0

#566 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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  • Joined: 11-July 08
  • Location:England
  • Interests:Women
    Money
    AI
    Writing

Posted 20 January 2009 - 11:42 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianism
souls are for wimps
0

#567 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

  • The Recidivist
  • Group: LHTEC
  • Posts: 2,371
  • Joined: 17-January 08
  • Location:Oz
  • Interests:Dungeons and Dragons, and the odd caramel slice.
  • The AIJman cometh

Posted 21 January 2009 - 11:02 AM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianism windmills
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


0

#568 User is offline   LadyMTL 

  • Epic bookworm
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 331
  • Joined: 19-November 08
  • Location:Canadaland

Posted 21 January 2009 - 05:33 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianism windmills collapse
~ Denn die Toten reiten schnell. (Lenore)
0

#569 User is offline   frookenhauer 

  • Mortal Sword
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 1,113
  • Joined: 11-July 08
  • Location:England
  • Interests:Women
    Money
    AI
    Writing

Posted 21 January 2009 - 09:56 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianism windmills collapse theological
souls are for wimps
0

#570 User is offline   eekwibble 

  • Only...
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 193
  • Joined: 21-March 08
  • Location:Manchestoh
  • Interests:West Haaaaaaaaaaam!!!!!

Posted 22 January 2009 - 06:44 AM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianism windmills collapse theological boundaries
QUOTE (amphibian @ Nov 11 2008) <Rake himself was a huge weight inside Draconus and he didn't go in with an army.>
0

#571 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

  • The Recidivist
  • Group: LHTEC
  • Posts: 2,371
  • Joined: 17-January 08
  • Location:Oz
  • Interests:Dungeons and Dragons, and the odd caramel slice.
  • The AIJman cometh

Posted 22 January 2009 - 08:07 AM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianism windmills collapse theological boundaries baking
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


0

#572 User is offline   Sixty 

  • Don't be fooled. I am very serious.
  • Group: High House Mafia
  • Posts: 762
  • Joined: 01-December 08
  • Location:New Hampshire

Posted 22 January 2009 - 07:46 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianism windmills collapse theological boundaries, baking exemplary

This post has been edited by Sixty: 22 January 2009 - 07:48 PM

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#573 User is offline   Thelomen Toblerone 

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Posted 22 January 2009 - 07:49 PM

View PostSixty, on Jan 22 2009, 07:46 PM, said:

View PostAin't_It_Just_, on Jan 22 2009, 03:07 AM, said:

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianism windmills collapse theological boundaries, baking exemplary strudels,


0

#574 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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Posted 23 January 2009 - 12:49 AM

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianism windmills collapse theological boundaries, baking exemplary strudels splendiforously,
souls are for wimps
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#575 User is offline   I Am The Wooden Doors 

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Posted 23 January 2009 - 02:19 AM

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompahd voraciously so trilobites transmogrify triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianism windmills collapse theological boundaries, baking exemplary strudels splendiforously, therefor
0

#576 User is offline   D'rek 

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Posted 23 January 2009 - 02:25 AM

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompah'd voraciously so trilobites transmogrified triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianist windmills collapse theological boundaries, baking exemplary strudels splendiforously. Therefore, Barry White

View Postworrywort, on 14 September 2012 - 08:07 PM, said:

I kinda love it when D'rek unleashes her nerd wrath, as I knew she would here. Sorry innocent bystanders, but someone's gotta be the kindling.
0

#577 User is offline   Thelomen Toblerone 

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Posted 23 January 2009 - 02:38 AM

View PostD'rek, on Jan 23 2009, 02:25 AM, said:

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompah'd voraciously so trilobites transmogrified triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianist windmills collapse theological boundaries, baking exemplary strudels splendiforously. Therefore, Barry White discombobulates

0

#578 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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    Writing

Posted 23 January 2009 - 05:30 PM

]"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompah'd voraciously so trilobites transmogrified triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianist windmills collapse theological boundaries, baking exemplary strudels splendiforously. Therefore, Barry White discombobulates disconsolately
souls are for wimps
0

#579 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

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  • The AIJman cometh

Posted 24 January 2009 - 11:22 AM

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompah'd voraciously so trilobites transmogrified triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianist windmills collapse theological boundaries, baking exemplary strudels splendiforously. Therefore, Barry White discombobulates disconsolately due
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


0

#580 User is offline   alestar 

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  • Location:Montreal
  • Interests:cooking, wine, beer, reading, music, hockey &amp; football

Posted 24 January 2009 - 04:24 PM

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I am physically boogitied vociferously by inconsiquentialities exsanguinating paradoxically perfunctory paroxysms! Politically, I presume Mother Willytop convulsing atop Hulk Hogan incinerates fat Aptorians backside sending Barry White texts.

Eventually eekwibble gayly necrophiled abnegated-Brood's bum. Triumphant Oompaloompas oompah'd voraciously so trilobites transmogrified triumphantly towards Thermopylae with undiluted moonshine.

Disestablishmentarianist windmills collapse theological boundaries, baking exemplary strudels splendiforously. Therefore, Barry White discombobulates disconsolately due primarily
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