[amphibian]

That's incredible progress. Way to go and I'm glad you're making visible change happen already.

[Vengeance]

Slow Ben, on 25 July 2016 - 07:46 PM, said:

Mezla PigDog, on 25 July 2016 - 12:01 PM, said:

Baby has slept through the last 3 nights 9pm to 6am-ish! I've had proper deep dreaming sleep for the first time since before he was born.

I mean this the nicest way possible.

I hate you.

You have to sleep train the little angles. You need to break them. Turn your monitor to mute so that you won't hear their screams of anguish before they fall asleep. Sure it will be a rough week. But then the sweet peaceful dreams of uninterrupted sleep. Plus now the little angles will learn to self sooth.

[Vengeance]

Raymond Luxury Yacht, on 26 July 2016 - 04:17 PM, said:

I've lost 20 pounds since my diabetes diagnosis on July 13. At this point I'm doing it mostly with diet and walking and it is working. I know later it will get harder and more exercise will be needed. Right now though I'm keeps no my daily calorie count somewhere between 1000 and 1200 a day and making sure I hit 10,000 steps a day at least. I also cut out caffeine cold turkey because I read it causes blood sugar spikes.

Still a looooong way to go. I want to lose enough weight to reverse it or at least get off all medication, I want to lose at least another 130 pounds. That's a whole person but whatever. I have also found out that I narrowly avoided needing insulin shots so I am just taking oral meds.

That is a great start RLY. Keep up the good work.

[Slow Ben]

Vengeance, on 26 July 2016 - 04:41 PM, said:

Slow Ben, on 25 July 2016 - 07:46 PM, said:

Mezla PigDog, on 25 July 2016 - 12:01 PM, said:

Baby has slept through the last 3 nights 9pm to 6am-ish! I've had proper deep dreaming sleep for the first time since before he was born.

I mean this the nicest way possible.

I hate you.

You have to sleep train the little angles. You need to break them. Turn your monitor to mute so that you won't hear their screams of anguish before they fall asleep. Sure it will be a rough week. But then the sweet peaceful dreams of uninterrupted sleep. Plus now the little angles will learn to self sooth.

Wow. I never thought of sleep training. No one has ever suggested that before.

What's your suggestion when your little one screams so long she makes herself throw up, and then screams some more, night after night?

[Vengeance]

Slow Ben, on 26 July 2016 - 04:55 PM, said:

Vengeance, on 26 July 2016 - 04:41 PM, said:

Slow Ben, on 25 July 2016 - 07:46 PM, said:

Mezla PigDog, on 25 July 2016 - 12:01 PM, said:

Baby has slept through the last 3 nights 9pm to 6am-ish! I've had proper deep dreaming sleep for the first time since before he was born.

I mean this the nicest way possible.

I hate you.

You have to sleep train the little angles. You need to break them. Turn your monitor to mute so that you won't hear their screams of anguish before they fall asleep. Sure it will be a rough week. But then the sweet peaceful dreams of uninterrupted sleep. Plus now the little angles will learn to self sooth.

Wow. I never thought of sleep training. No one has ever suggested that before.

What's your suggestion when your little one screams so long she makes herself throw up, and then screams some more, night after night?

With the second one I got a video monitor that had a mute button. I put that on and then turned on the fan in our bedroom to help drown out the noise. It took us about 2 weeks with the second one and 1 week with the first. Also a really good sound machine in the kids rooms help. We got White noise machine for Penny and that was awesome. Still it was a lot of crying and a bit of throwing up. At first we had a 1 hour time limit. After an hour we would break down and go in and get her. Then it went to an hour and a half then 2 hours. Very rough couple of weeks. Elliot was much easier and only took 1 week. Of course now he is scared of the dark and has to sleep with the light on and will wake up periodically and come into bed with us.

It is honestly one of the most brutal things that we have done. Still totally worth it. Basically we reached the breaking point were we knew she was not going to die and we needed more then 3 hours of sleep.

[QuickTidal]

We will be doing the Ferber thing, with the "leave them longer each time you go in" deal to help them sleep train. My wife won't do what my parents did with me (let me scream all night till I tuckered myself out...and I never had issues sleeping again), so Ferber is the best I can get but it seems like a decent blend of our ideologies on sleep training. No matter what I expect it to be difficult. And we won't do what her sister did with her firstborn, which was attend to her all the time, any time she cried, picked her up and comforted her. That kid has a harder time getting to sleep now than any kid I've ever seen in my life. That was NOT the way. LOL

[Vengeance]

QuickTidal, on 26 July 2016 - 06:12 PM, said:

We will be doing the Ferber thing, with the "leave them longer each time you go in" deal to help them sleep train. My wife won't do what my parents did with me (let me scream all night till I tuckered myself out...and I never had issues sleeping again), so Ferber is the best I can get but it seems like a decent blend of our ideologies on sleep training. No matter what I expect it to be difficult. And we won't do what her sister did with her firstborn, which was attend to her all the time, any time she cried, picked her up and comforted her. That kid has a harder time getting to sleep now than any kid I've ever seen in my life. That was NOT the way. LOL

We incorporated a little of that as well. I have to say other then my son waking up in the middle of the night (due to potty training) both of the kids go down well and hard come bed time. We also stick to the bed time schedule like crazy. Also them getting good naps and having a consistent napping schedule helps a lot.

[QuickTidal]

Vengeance, on 26 July 2016 - 06:19 PM, said:

QuickTidal, on 26 July 2016 - 06:12 PM, said:

We will be doing the Ferber thing, with the "leave them longer each time you go in" deal to help them sleep train. My wife won't do what my parents did with me (let me scream all night till I tuckered myself out...and I never had issues sleeping again), so Ferber is the best I can get but it seems like a decent blend of our ideologies on sleep training. No matter what I expect it to be difficult. And we won't do what her sister did with her firstborn, which was attend to her all the time, any time she cried, picked her up and comforted her. That kid has a harder time getting to sleep now than any kid I've ever seen in my life. That was NOT the way. LOL

We incorporated a little of that as well. I have to say other then my son waking up in the middle of the night (due to potty training) both of the kids go down well and hard come bed time. We also stick to the bed time schedule like crazy. Also them getting good naps and having a consistent napping schedule helps a lot.

I've heard napping is very important, and we have a nap schedule someone gave us stuck to the fridge for when the time comes, so hopefully we are prepared on that front as well.

[Mezla PigDog]

Slow Ben, on 25 July 2016 - 07:46 PM, said:

Mezla PigDog, on 25 July 2016 - 12:01 PM, said:

Baby has slept through the last 3 nights 9pm to 6am-ish! I've had proper deep dreaming sleep for the first time since before he was born.

I mean this the nicest way possible.

I hate you.

:-p

No idea how it happened other than he crams as much milk into himself as is physically possible between 6am and 9pm and refuses to sleep during the day.

Sleep training / cry it out is really frowned upon by "officials" in this country nowadays. It's the kind of thing you would think twice about telling people that you did to your kids. Not sure what I'll do when/if the time comes.

[Raymond Luxury Yacht]

I got so lucky with sweet baby Ray. He's always went down to sleep well, even now that he's 2. I wish I could take credit for it but we just got lucky.

[DeadHedge]

I'm like RLY, got really lucky with my son.

From day 1 slept 8 hours straight, then once he was on solids he started going down at 6pm and up at 7am.

He is now 5 and is in bed between 6:30/7:30pm and sleeps through to 6:30am at a minimum (unless he has an accident). Can't take credit for it though.

I agree with Venge on the sleep training I have friends who had to do this and it has worked great, it was hard on them, but it did work.

My sister in law didn't do anything and my niece is a little shit when it comes to bed. They fill her up with sugar during the day, rarely do anything to burn it off (and by rarely, I mean in the 3 weeks since summer hols hit Scotland, my niece has been out 3 times to burn off energy, all of which were because me and my wife took her out) then wonder why she is still wide awake at 11pm.

They actually started to convince themselves it was ADHD until my wife made my Sis-in-law watch a programme (cant remember the name) but it showed kids who had poor diets and were little shits at bed, didn't change their pattern though.

[Malankazooie]

There's a robin's nest on a tree just outside my office window. I've been working from home today and it's been amazing watching how much work the mother does to feed her babies. Three chicks' heads pop up every time she returns to the nest with food. These are some hungry babies because she goes out on insect gathering runs about 3 or 4 times an hour and feeds them. She is very diligent to make sure all three get their fair share of the bounty. Neat stuff.

[Gust Hubb]

And now, consequence of trying that dating site last night as mentioned on the groove thread, I have a date Monday. Go figure.

I was just trying to maintain a conversation with one of the people and now dinner/happy hour. I have a feeling I will be bipolar for the next few weeks; nothing good lasts forever, but I am cautiously optimistic.

[worry]

What's your demeanor IRL under more 'normal' conditions?

[Tsundoku]

9 days off, starting tomorrow.

[Gust Hubb]

Kanyemander West, on 29 July 2016 - 02:51 AM, said:

What's your demeanor IRL under more 'normal' conditions?

Not sure. Been a while since those conditions existed.

[Abyss]

ok.... let's go over the basics here...

1 - Do not discuss your ex, your divorce, being single, dating, money. If she brings these things up, respond briefly then ask her something tangential and redirect the chat.

2 - By all means discuss your kids, but briefly. Then ask her something.

3 - Have the following conversational backups available - one tv show, one old movie, your favorite food type and where you go to eat it. Remember to ask her what hers is.

4 - If you split the bill, do not parse out who ate what. Unless you ate way more, in which case offer to pay more, cover the tip, or otherwise show you're not cheap. Once. If she still wants to split, split.

5 - If you are so inclined, offer to pay. If she refuses, do not insist, tho I recommend 'you can get it next time' if you want to dangle that possibility. If she refuses, shut up and let her pay half.

6 - Do not expect anything. Smile. Ask questions.

7 - If you get into a jam, excuse yourself to the washroom and either climb out a window and run away, or post to the forum and stay in the stall until one of us replies with a plan of action which will no doubt be brilliant, help, and in no way involve potsherds, vodka, Pokémon Go or llamas.

[Tiste Simeon]

Fart regularly to show how calm & confident you are.

[JPK]

Gust Hubb, on 29 July 2016 - 02:45 AM, said:

And now, consequence of trying that dating site last night as mentioned on the groove thread, I have a date Monday. Go figure.

I was just trying to maintain a conversation with one of the people and now dinner/happy hour. I have a feeling I will be bipolar for the next few weeks; nothing good lasts forever, but I am cautiously optimistic.

Way to go man. One day and you've already got someone interested enough to meet in person.

I think the others have already given you some good advice on jumping back into casual dating (especially Abyss) but above everything else remember to have some fun with this. From what I can tell, you're a damn good guy and I suspect it comes out quickly in person.

Last bit of advice: take the last hour before you're supposed to meet and listen to some confidence music. Something that leaves you with a positive groove and a feeling of "damn right, I GOT this. My go-to was Fall Out Boy (don't judge me people!) but you'll have a good idea of what works best for you.

[Gust Hubb]

Might have to listen to Kaleo. This chick is into that style of music, and if I come out of this alive, I have a whole host of new bands to start listening to (the music exchange was worth it, totally).

Still feel way too young with all this optimism and hope. Feel like I am itching for new scars and have this detached part of me watching and shaking his head going "poor fool."