Malazan Empire: Ye Big Movie thread - Malazan Empire

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Ye Big Movie thread

#7581 User is offline   QuickTidal 

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Posted 07 August 2015 - 06:11 PM

View PostPrimateus, on 07 August 2015 - 05:55 PM, said:

View PostQuickTidal, on 07 August 2015 - 04:59 PM, said:



Wow, that sounds even worse than I imagined. And what the hell is this about Sue not even going on the trip that caused it in the first place, but getting her power from "a blast when they return"? What the hell?


Indeed. One of about 20 fundamental flaws. Also, they go through the gate to the Negative Zone Planet Zero because they "get drunk and crazily want to act on their science theories". I can't make this shit up.
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#7582 User is offline   polishgenius 

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Posted 07 August 2015 - 06:30 PM

I wanna say 'this is what happens when you give a superhero gig to someone who hates superheroes' but Warren Ellis hates superheroes too and has written some of the best stories ever. So it's not just that.
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#7583 User is offline   QuickTidal 

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Posted 07 August 2015 - 06:47 PM

View Postpolishgenius, on 07 August 2015 - 06:30 PM, said:

I wanna say 'this is what happens when you give a superhero gig to someone who hates superheroes' but Warren Ellis hates superheroes too and has written some of the best stories ever. So it's not just that.


Trank tweeted and deleted (it was screencapped) that HIS FF movie would have been fantastic but we'll never get to see it, throws FOX under the bus for the whole shebang like a petulant child. Yes Josh, NONE of the things wrong with the film are your fault at all. Meanwhile nothing in the scenes I saw appealed to me at all, the reviews all roundly sum up the film and I don't know that you can blame anything but the abruptness and editing and flow of the film at Fox/Kinberg reshoots feet. Everything else was in there from the get go before Fox began meddling and everything went south.

This was flawed from the get-go for a few reasons.

- Misunderstanding the thrust of the source material and why the FF works. This is evident in Trank explicitly telling his actors NOT to read any FF source material to prep....which is such a mind-numbingly stupid thing to tell actors that I can't even fathom it.

- Going for gritty realism with one of the only comic properties that REQUIRES a GotG-level colourful whimsy and science adventure.

- Refusing to allow Doctor Doom to be what he is in the comics. An over the top, disfigured, Shakespearean villain in a Vader mask and a cape who is both an incredible intellect AND a sorcerer who meddles in magic.

- Missing out on the family dynamic altogether and just jamming people together with a script that apparently offer no warmth or camaraderie.

- Leaving out the only female character of the Fantastic Four when the powers are gained...so the boys club can get drunk and go science bros in another dimension.

- The Thing with no voice modulation and no pants.

Trank can bitch about the flow and editing and re shoots all he likes...but the above flaws I lay almost entirely at his feet (and the script) as WELL as FOX's feet.
"When the last tree has fallen, and the rivers are poisoned, you cannot eat money, oh no." ~Aurora

"Someone will always try to sell you despair, just so they don't feel alone." ~Ursula Vernon
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#7584 User is offline   polishgenius 

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Posted 07 August 2015 - 07:01 PM

I just don't understand what's so hard about getting a FF movie tonally right. Pixar managed it and they weren't even making a Fantastic Four film.
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#7585 User is offline   QuickTidal 

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Posted 07 August 2015 - 07:26 PM

View Postpolishgenius, on 07 August 2015 - 07:01 PM, said:

I just don't understand what's so hard about getting a FF movie tonally right. Pixar managed it and they weren't even making a Fantastic Four film.


And that's the nail right on the head. The BEST FF movie we've ever seen is Brad Bird's THE INCREDIBLES. Hands down. It's tonally perfect and executed with ease.

Basically a live action FF movie needs to take its cues from GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY and then mingle that with THE INCREDIBLES...and job done. But for some reason no one wants to do that.
"When the last tree has fallen, and the rivers are poisoned, you cannot eat money, oh no." ~Aurora

"Someone will always try to sell you despair, just so they don't feel alone." ~Ursula Vernon
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#7586 User is offline   Tiste Simeon 

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Posted 07 August 2015 - 10:10 PM

Right I vote we all make an FF movie using our combined skills and knowledge! MALAZ PRESENTS:FANTASTIC FOUR Who's with me?
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#7587 User is offline   QuickTidal 

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Posted 10 August 2015 - 11:05 AM

View PostKing Briar, on 10 August 2015 - 04:04 AM, said:

So I'm about 30 mins into Birdman and I'm trying to figure out just what I'm watching but I'm lmao so far.

Ed: erh what a disappointing reveal!

Ed2 2nd reveal was back on track. After having seen this though idk why this movie won. I loled a lot in the beginning but the rest was meh.


It's one of those Oscar wins that I feel HAD to be more about the technical and the individual performances over the story. I was just as Meh as you about it...actually I believe I hated it.
"When the last tree has fallen, and the rivers are poisoned, you cannot eat money, oh no." ~Aurora

"Someone will always try to sell you despair, just so they don't feel alone." ~Ursula Vernon
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#7588 User is offline   QuickTidal 

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Posted 11 August 2015 - 04:29 PM

Hilarious rundown/takedown of the entire FANT4STIC movie.

http://io9.com/the-m...-rem-1723363327
"When the last tree has fallen, and the rivers are poisoned, you cannot eat money, oh no." ~Aurora

"Someone will always try to sell you despair, just so they don't feel alone." ~Ursula Vernon
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#7589 User is offline   Andorion 

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Posted 11 August 2015 - 04:46 PM

View PostTiste Simeon, on 07 August 2015 - 10:10 PM, said:

Right I vote we all make an FF movie using our combined skills and knowledge! MALAZ PRESENTS:FANTASTIC FOUR Who's with me?


A movie about the exploits of Whiskeyjacks squad in the Genebackis wars would trump all superhero movies till date.
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#7590 User is offline   Tiste Simeon 

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Posted 11 August 2015 - 08:46 PM

Finally saw FARGO. Truly brilliant film, thoroughly enjoyed it! Going to watch the TV show now methinks.

Ando, you are right. I doubt it would be appreciated as most superhero films are though...
A Haunting Poem
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We all Scream
For I Scream.
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#7591 User is offline   A Demon Llama! 

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Posted 12 August 2015 - 01:57 AM

Watched Tommy Boy and Black Sheep for the first time this past weekend. Really enjoyed the movies and don't know why I haven't seen them before as I used watch Beverly Hills Ninja all the time when I was younger. Just so sad that Chris Farley passed away. He was such an enjoyable dude.
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#7592 User is offline   A Demon Llama! 

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Posted 15 August 2015 - 12:43 AM

Twins. Don't know if its a terrible movie, or just somewhat terrible.
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#7593 User is offline   Primateus 

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Posted 15 August 2015 - 07:51 AM

View PostA Demon Llama!, on 15 August 2015 - 12:43 AM, said:

Twins. Don't know if its a terrible movie, or just somewhat terrible.


With DeVito and Ahnuld? That one is the strongest movie in the Governators arsenal!
Screw you all, and have a nice day!

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#7594 User is offline   A Demon Llama! 

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Posted 15 August 2015 - 06:00 PM

View PostPrimateus, on 15 August 2015 - 07:51 AM, said:

View PostA Demon Llama!, on 15 August 2015 - 12:43 AM, said:

Twins. Don't know if its a terrible movie, or just somewhat terrible.


With DeVito and Ahnuld? That one is the strongest movie in the Governators arsenal!


Yeah I watched it cause there is supposed to be another movie coming soon with 'em called "Triplets" I though, damn if they are making a sequel, the previous one was probably good.

Right??


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#7595 User is offline   Primateus 

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Posted 15 August 2015 - 06:36 PM

View PostA Demon Llama!, on 15 August 2015 - 06:00 PM, said:

View PostPrimateus, on 15 August 2015 - 07:51 AM, said:

View PostA Demon Llama!, on 15 August 2015 - 12:43 AM, said:

Twins. Don't know if its a terrible movie, or just somewhat terrible.


With DeVito and Ahnuld? That one is the strongest movie in the Governators arsenal!


Yeah I watched it cause there is supposed to be another movie coming soon with 'em called "Triplets" I though, damn if they are making a sequel, the previous one was probably good.

Right??





I suppose it was good in the seventies...
Screw you all, and have a nice day!

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#7596 User is offline   amphibian 

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Posted 16 August 2015 - 02:20 AM

Twins is goofy comedy with a dollop of action.

It's pretty good.
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#7597 User is offline   Primateus 

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Posted 16 August 2015 - 08:55 AM

View Postamphibian, on 16 August 2015 - 02:20 AM, said:

Twins is goofy comedy with a dollop of action.

It's pretty good.


That's true, I liked it when I saw it the first couple of times back in the early nineties. Which is also why I refuse to see it again today, I'm not sure it will have aged well and I might hate it today.
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#7598 User is offline   Tiste Simeon 

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Posted 16 August 2015 - 09:26 PM

Watching through LOTR again. Only this time it's extended versions, Blu-Ray edition. Flipping heck, but these films are still stunning. They have aged incredibly well (which further cheapens the look of the Hobbit despite it being released however many years later...)
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#7599 User is offline   Illuyankas 

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Posted 17 August 2015 - 05:50 AM

Michael Bay is a creepy creepy man who I would not want near my daughter if I had one.
Hello, soldiers, look at your mage, now back to me, now back at your mage, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped being an unascended mortal and switched to Sole Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re in a warren with the High Mage your cadre mage could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an acorn with two gates to that realm you love. Look again, the acorn is now otataral. Anything is possible when your mage smells like Sole Spice and not a Bole brother. I’m on a quorl.
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#7600 User is offline   A Demon Llama! 

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Posted 17 August 2015 - 04:12 PM

Isn't Unobtanium an actual word for theoretical/ rare materials/ rare elements? Sounds stupid as hell but at least its real.

Mission Impossible 5 was pretty damn good. Gotta love Tom Cruise.
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