Malazan Empire: What's messing with your groove? - Malazan Empire

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What's messing with your groove?

#3321 User is offline   chill 

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Posted 01 February 2010 - 10:24 PM

Saw an old lady get mugged today. The fucker was to far away, so I couldn't do anything about it.
Even worse, he dragged the poor lady through the mud until she let go of her purse.
The only thing I could do was to help her get back on her feet and stay with her to talk with the police. All she had in the purse was some cash and personal documents...
and it's not the first time she got mugged either.
She also complained of pain in her left arm, and she was visibly shocked, and breathing shallow - but it seems the arm was hurt because the shithead yanked it... Still I'm glad the cops took her to the hospital pretty fast.

Goddamit, wish I could've tackled that son of a bitch.
Kif: Sir, remember your course correction?
Captain Zapp: No.
Kif: Well, it's proving somewhat more suicidal than we'd initially hoped.
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#3322 User is offline   Tiste Simeon 

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Posted 01 February 2010 - 11:52 PM

That is so frustrating man, hope she ends up fine...
A Haunting Poem
I Scream
You Scream
We all Scream
For I Scream.
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#3323 User is offline   Adjutant Stormy~ 

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Posted 02 February 2010 - 12:42 AM

That sucks, my friend got mugged a while back. It happened less than a block from my apartment, and I actually heard it from my window but didn't know it was him! If I had known what was going on I would have run down to bust some heads. I own an ax for just such a purpose (and to cut wood, but that's more of a side-purpose).
<!--quoteo(post=462161:date=Nov 1 2008, 06:13 PM:name=Aptorian)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Aptorian @ Nov 1 2008, 06:13 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=462161"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->God damn. Mighty drunk. Must ... what is the english movement movement movement for drunk... with out you seemimg drunk?

bla bla bla

Peopleare harrasing me... grrrrrh.

Also people with big noses aren't jews, they're just french

EDIT: We has editted so mucj that5 we're not quite sure... also, leave britney alone.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
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#3324 User is offline   Centzon Totochtin 

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Posted 02 February 2010 - 04:33 AM

If I stab everyone here, do you tink I might lose my job? I have had such a frustrating day:

first the damned city cat (catamaran that runs along the river here) refused to take on passengers or swap some of the passengers going to riverside to the ferry IMMEDIATELY BEHIND IT (that was terminating at the next stop, so no good for me but fine for the majority of the passengers on the city cat) so I had to wait an extra half hour to get to work and was late. I complained, very loudly and very officially, though I would have been more pissed off if I actually paid for the trip.

then I have some issues at work of the "too many cooks in the ketchen" variety - and I am covering for my direct managers who is sick today so lots of phone calls/people walking up to me and interupting my work

and a jackhammer has been going pretty much constantly all day outside our building

then the toilets in my building have all be closed due to the construction work so I have to walk to another building to use the toilet

then the dean wont sign off on forms which he should be signing and wants a page justification per form


:D :p :p :) :p :p

:p
That Elephant is looking rather frayed at the edges
2

#3325 User is offline   Darkwatch 

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Posted 02 February 2010 - 04:43 AM

View PostCentzon Totochtin, on 02 February 2010 - 04:33 AM, said:


then the dean wont sign off on forms which he should be signing and wants a page justification per form


:D :p :p :) :p :p

:p


Staple them all together, then produce on page of justification that is a veiled insult at his bureaucratic mentality.
If he doesn't sign it you've done your part.
The you can call me and I'll come in and cause the dean to get misplaced in a river full of bullsharks.
The Pub is Always Open

Proud supporter of the Wolves of Winter. Glory be to her Majesty, The Lady Snow.
Cursed Summer returns. The Lady Now Sleeps.

The Sexy Thatch Burning Physicist

Τον Πρωτος Αληθη Δεσποτην της Οικιας Αυτος

RodeoRanch said:

You're a rock.
A non-touching itself rock.
0

#3326 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

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Posted 02 February 2010 - 06:29 AM

View PostCentzon Totochtin, on 02 February 2010 - 04:33 AM, said:

If I stab everyone here, do you tink I might lose my job? I have had such a frustrating day:

first the damned city cat (catamaran that runs along the river here) refused to take on passengers or swap some of the passengers going to riverside to the ferry IMMEDIATELY BEHIND IT (that was terminating at the next stop, so no good for me but fine for the majority of the passengers on the city cat) so I had to wait an extra half hour to get to work and was late. I complained, very loudly and very officially, though I would have been more pissed off if I actually paid for the trip.

then I have some issues at work of the "too many cooks in the ketchen" variety - and I am covering for my direct managers who is sick today so lots of phone calls/people walking up to me and interupting my work

and a jackhammer has been going pretty much constantly all day outside our building

then the toilets in my building have all be closed due to the construction work so I have to walk to another building to use the toilet

then the dean wont sign off on forms which he should be signing and wants a page justification per form


:D :p :p :) :p :p

:p


Sounds like te day from hell....chin up, Mezla!
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


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#3327 User is offline   Darkwatch 

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Posted 02 February 2010 - 06:32 AM

View PostAin, on 02 February 2010 - 06:29 AM, said:

View PostCentzon Totochtin, on 02 February 2010 - 04:33 AM, said:

If I stab everyone here, do you tink I might lose my job? I have had such a frustrating day:

first the damned city cat (catamaran that runs along the river here) refused to take on passengers or swap some of the passengers going to riverside to the ferry IMMEDIATELY BEHIND IT (that was terminating at the next stop, so no good for me but fine for the majority of the passengers on the city cat) so I had to wait an extra half hour to get to work and was late. I complained, very loudly and very officially, though I would have been more pissed off if I actually paid for the trip.

then I have some issues at work of the "too many cooks in the ketchen" variety - and I am covering for my direct managers who is sick today so lots of phone calls/people walking up to me and interupting my work

and a jackhammer has been going pretty much constantly all day outside our building

then the toilets in my building have all be closed due to the construction work so I have to walk to another building to use the toilet

then the dean wont sign off on forms which he should be signing and wants a page justification per form


:D :p :p :) :p :p

:p


Sounds like te day from hell....chin up, Mezla!



Smooth.
The Pub is Always Open

Proud supporter of the Wolves of Winter. Glory be to her Majesty, The Lady Snow.
Cursed Summer returns. The Lady Now Sleeps.

The Sexy Thatch Burning Physicist

Τον Πρωτος Αληθη Δεσποτην της Οικιας Αυτος

RodeoRanch said:

You're a rock.
A non-touching itself rock.
2

#3328 User is offline   Centzon Totochtin 

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Posted 02 February 2010 - 06:34 AM

View PostAin, on 02 February 2010 - 06:29 AM, said:

View PostCentzon Totochtin, on 02 February 2010 - 04:33 AM, said:

If I stab everyone here, do you tink I might lose my job? I have had such a frustrating day:first the damned city cat (catamaran that runs along the river here) refused to take on passengers or swap some of the passengers going to riverside to the ferry IMMEDIATELY BEHIND IT (that was terminating at the next stop, so no good for me but fine for the majority of the passengers on the city cat) so I had to wait an extra half hour to get to work and was late. I complained, very loudly and very officially, though I would have been more pissed off if I actually paid for the trip.then I have some issues at work of the "too many cooks in the ketchen" variety - and I am covering for my direct managers who is sick today so lots of phone calls/people walking up to me and interupting my workand a jackhammer has been going pretty much constantly all day outside our buildingthen the toilets in my building have all be closed due to the construction work so I have to walk to another building to use the toiletthen the dean wont sign off on forms which he should be signing and wants a page justification per form :p :p :p :) :p :p :p
Sounds like te day from hell....chin up, Mezla!


*cries* :D


Thanks DW, shark attacks and such sound awesome
That Elephant is looking rather frayed at the edges
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#3329 User is offline   Darkwatch 

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Posted 02 February 2010 - 06:56 AM

No problem Centz. Hope the rest of the week goes better.

As for myself. Well it's 2am and I have to finish a project for what is now today.
Whoooo!
The Pub is Always Open

Proud supporter of the Wolves of Winter. Glory be to her Majesty, The Lady Snow.
Cursed Summer returns. The Lady Now Sleeps.

The Sexy Thatch Burning Physicist

Τον Πρωτος Αληθη Δεσποτην της Οικιας Αυτος

RodeoRanch said:

You're a rock.
A non-touching itself rock.
0

#3330 User is offline   masan's saddle 

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Posted 03 February 2010 - 12:53 AM

About an hour ago, I was sitting across the room from the mrs when she asked me pass over her I-Phone, being the lazy twat that I am, I casually tossed the 2 week old, £400, top of the range thing of beauty in her general direction.

I completley failed to see the big mug of tea camoflaged behind her knee.....plop.

I nearly posted in the what's making me happy thread cos' it was a fucking awesome one in a million shot that I would struggle to replicate ever again, however the phone is fucked and so am I.....well not for at least another 3 months anyway.

My ears are still ringing, but the best part is knowing that it doesn't matter how many of her friends and work colleagues she slags me out to, statistically speaking at least 50% will openly commiserate with her whilst secretly wishing they were as cool as me.
Now all the friends that you knew in school they used to be so cool, now they just bore you.
Just look at em' now, already pullin' the plow. So quick to take to grain, like some old mule.
4

#3331 User is offline   Illuyankas 

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Posted 03 February 2010 - 12:56 AM

Worst case scenario, you can always get another partner but you'll never do that shot again. Be proud.
Hello, soldiers, look at your mage, now back to me, now back at your mage, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped being an unascended mortal and switched to Sole Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re in a warren with the High Mage your cadre mage could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an acorn with two gates to that realm you love. Look again, the acorn is now otataral. Anything is possible when your mage smells like Sole Spice and not a Bole brother. I’m on a quorl.
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#3332 User is offline   RodeoRanch 

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Posted 03 February 2010 - 04:04 AM

Auhhhhhhhgggghhhhhhhhh! Wee crazy chick has phoned me tonight declaring she's happy that our break period is over and we can resume dating.

:(
1

#3333 User is offline   HoosierDaddy 

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Posted 03 February 2010 - 04:05 AM

Crazy sneak attack! RUN! RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Trouble arrives when the opponents to such a system institute its extreme opposite, where individualism becomes godlike and sacrosanct, and no greater service to any other ideal (including community) is possible. In such a system rapacious greed thrives behind the guise of freedom, and the worst aspects of human nature come to the fore....
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#3334 User is offline   Centzon Totochtin 

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Posted 03 February 2010 - 04:20 AM

Tell her that during your "break period" you have started sleeping with seals and no longer need her services.
That Elephant is looking rather frayed at the edges
3

#3335 User is offline   Korbal Broach 

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Posted 03 February 2010 - 04:26 AM

I was thinking you should tell her that the hooker took your heart... you were just getting better service from her :(
I'm not about to engage in a battle of the wits with an unarmed opponent.
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#3336 User is offline   Darkwatch 

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Posted 03 February 2010 - 04:33 AM

View PostRodeoRanch, on 03 February 2010 - 04:04 AM, said:

Auhhhhhhhgggghhhhhhhhh! Wee crazy chick has phoned me tonight declaring she's happy that our break period is over and we can resume dating.

:(


Oh man, that made me laugh.
The Pub is Always Open

Proud supporter of the Wolves of Winter. Glory be to her Majesty, The Lady Snow.
Cursed Summer returns. The Lady Now Sleeps.

The Sexy Thatch Burning Physicist

Τον Πρωτος Αληθη Δεσποτην της Οικιας Αυτος

RodeoRanch said:

You're a rock.
A non-touching itself rock.
0

#3337 User is offline   bubba 

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Posted 03 February 2010 - 04:38 AM

View PostRodeoRanch, on 03 February 2010 - 04:04 AM, said:

Auhhhhhhhgggghhhhhhhhh! Wee crazy chick has phoned me tonight declaring she's happy that our break period is over and we can resume dating.

:(


I just choked on my popcorn.Posted Image

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#3338 User is offline   Illuyankas 

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Posted 03 February 2010 - 04:43 AM

View PostRodeoRanch, on 03 February 2010 - 04:04 AM, said:

Auhhhhhhhgggghhhhhhhhh! Wee crazy chick has phoned me tonight declaring she's happy that our break period is over and we can resume dating.

:(

Wear the most obvious toupee imaginable. Pretend it's your original hair. Deny all claims to the contrary.
Hello, soldiers, look at your mage, now back to me, now back at your mage, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped being an unascended mortal and switched to Sole Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re in a warren with the High Mage your cadre mage could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an acorn with two gates to that realm you love. Look again, the acorn is now otataral. Anything is possible when your mage smells like Sole Spice and not a Bole brother. I’m on a quorl.
0

#3339 User is offline   Darkwatch 

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Posted 03 February 2010 - 04:48 AM

She's crazy, she'll only be more aroused.
The Pub is Always Open

Proud supporter of the Wolves of Winter. Glory be to her Majesty, The Lady Snow.
Cursed Summer returns. The Lady Now Sleeps.

The Sexy Thatch Burning Physicist

Τον Πρωτος Αληθη Δεσποτην της Οικιας Αυτος

RodeoRanch said:

You're a rock.
A non-touching itself rock.
0

#3340 User is offline   Jusentantaka 

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Posted 03 February 2010 - 05:39 AM

View PostRodeoRanch, on 03 February 2010 - 04:04 AM, said:

Auhhhhhhhgggghhhhhhhhh! Wee crazy chick has phoned me tonight declaring she's happy that our break period is over and we can resume dating.

:(


Book an appointment for her at your local psychiatrist's office, tell her you'll meet her at that address for a date. Or, if its one of those perfect relationships where she doesn't know where you live or work, dodge calls for 3 or 4 days and then get a friend to pick up and say that you were killed in a car accident and that the funeral was the day before.
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