My sister got a call from her bank the other day about suspicious transactions, ATM withdrwals etc. She freaked out, cancelled all her cards and tried to claim the money back through insurance. Then she admitted to me that she did lose her ATM card and that she needed to find it to prove to the bank she had it or else the bank no refund the money. I got nervous and had to be the one to say that maybe it was her husband. Turns out, sure enough, it was. He denies it all of course, gets confronted with the evidence, changes track to yes it was him but its not theft etc. He had even saved his bank account as a beneficiary under a false name in my sisters online bank account. Denies drugs are involved.
They say its a sickness and I want to help but frankly at this point I feel like I need to prioritize my sister and nephews well being over his but I don't know what the right move is. If its a sickness I need to at least see an acknowledgement from him that he wants to get better. Instead he seems to lie even when telling the truth is the simpler option. That to me is a big warning sign. I can't, won't and don't trust anything he says at this point. He is quite badly sick at the moment, he says he has the flu. I have to wonder if its not withdrawal know that he has been found out.
He is a smart guy, very successful at work and yet somehow so incredibly stupid. He takes out debt and than hides it and it grows. We fix it. He does it again. I worry that he may dig a whole my sister wont be able to crawl out of. The one thing, thank god, and I give him credit for is that he has never been violent. Still I worry about leaving my sister alone with him, I worry about my nephew. I cant say how many times he drove my nephew in his car drunk or stoned but I know it happened before we knew. He has invited his friend, who turned out to be his dealer into our house. In my country you really do have to worry that that is one step away from having men with guns show up in your house and ransack the place for every valuable. I have to worry that if left alone in our house that he might let the robbers in himself just for a cut.
Those are the big fears. The little fears are that my sister is trapped in a loveless marriage with a man she cant depend on. She wants to help him but is not sure how at this point.
Mezla PigDog, on 31 May 2018 - 09:21 AM, said:
Argh. This psycho bitch at work is full on bullying someone junior in my team. It's so infuriating. Doing the HR route but how many infractions are needed before someone should be told to clear their damned desk? I've got her on bullying, harassment AND discrimination. We all work remotely in different timezones so it's impossible to look the woman in the eye and tell her she has to go through me for everything. I wake up every morning to an email trail of destruction. We'll all be in the same place for a week soon. I want to wring her bloody neck.
I need details! Biochemist sitcoms are so rare! At least you have your teams back. Few bosses do these days