[HoosierDaddy]

worry, on 25 August 2015 - 05:52 AM, said:

HoosierDaddy, on 25 August 2015 - 02:39 AM, said:

RIP Justin Wilson.

Thanks for all the memories.

If you mean the Indycar guy, I wasn't familiar at all, but seeing the video was truly shocking (even without being at all graphic). Those cars are really terrifying and the whole thing is so sad.

Freak, freak accident that he wasn't even apart of. But at those speeds freak accidents become deadly.

Sad.

Not too many people care about Indycar, but Indy surely does. Big loss.

[Lost Marine]

CowboyYojimbo, on 24 August 2015 - 01:43 AM, said:

Any other mid-to-late 20s, feeling like your behind or doing something wrong?

I'm 24 (25 in January), back home currently, single, and finding each year I lose more friends and family either from death or just moving. Then I'm seeing people I knew from school getting married or rocking their career.
I went to school for firefighting, and I just fight forest fires in the summer for 4 to 4 1/2 months then get unemployment payments while I try to dabble in writing and film or just "live". Fire halls either only hire full time and the competition is brutal. or they start you as a volunteer meaning have something to pay bills and live in that town already. So I have to pick a town, move and hope I get a position, that doesn't pay the bills, so it can evolve in to one that may. Wish I had someone telling me where to go.

I'm by no means dumb or socially inept, just my dream jobs (firefighter and writer) apparently suck and are a logistical nightmare, I don't meet many women I'd want to pursue past date 1, small towns I guess, and I've had some setbacks that werent my fault, a lot of death, bad gigs. Just feel alone these days, and like Im in a waiting room, waiting for life to truly start.

Don't normally vent publically like this but holy hell, can anyone relate? Did shit improve? Can't catch a break anymore.

Don't worry about being behind, I didn't even start college until I was 25. Got out of the Marine Corps and drifted for a bit before I finally found something that appealled to me and went to college for that career. Your wildland experience will put you above most other guys coming straight out of fire school. One tthing I've noticed is that more and more fire departments are requiring higher level medical trainning. If you have the interest, time, and money to get either your EMT or Paramedic certs that will make you very attractive too.

I work for a state forestry agency as a forester and a wildland firefighter. The pay isn't as good as the federal jobs but it's full time and provides a lot of training opportunities. We end up having a lot of folks camping here for a few years to build up their certs and experience then jumping to the structure side. That might be a good route for you and at least keep you working year round for a bit.

All in all you're too young to be worried about what you should or shouldn't have achieved by now. Don't look at where others are at either, chances are a lot of the guys "rocking" their careers wish they could run off and fight forest fires in the wilderness every year (that stuff is fun).

Just keep your goals in mind and keep slogging.

[Vengeance]

Lost Marine, on 26 August 2015 - 02:15 PM, said:

CowboyYojimbo, on 24 August 2015 - 01:43 AM, said:

Any other mid-to-late 20s, feeling like your behind or doing something wrong?

I'm 24 (25 in January), back home currently, single, and finding each year I lose more friends and family either from death or just moving. Then I'm seeing people I knew from school getting married or rocking their career.
I went to school for firefighting, and I just fight forest fires in the summer for 4 to 4 1/2 months then get unemployment payments while I try to dabble in writing and film or just "live". Fire halls either only hire full time and the competition is brutal. or they start you as a volunteer meaning have something to pay bills and live in that town already. So I have to pick a town, move and hope I get a position, that doesn't pay the bills, so it can evolve in to one that may. Wish I had someone telling me where to go.

I'm by no means dumb or socially inept, just my dream jobs (firefighter and writer) apparently suck and are a logistical nightmare, I don't meet many women I'd want to pursue past date 1, small towns I guess, and I've had some setbacks that werent my fault, a lot of death, bad gigs. Just feel alone these days, and like Im in a waiting room, waiting for life to truly start.

Don't normally vent publically like this but holy hell, can anyone relate? Did shit improve? Can't catch a break anymore.

Don't worry about being behind, I didn't even start college until I was 25. Got out of the Marine Corps and drifted for a bit before I finally found something that appealled to me and went to college for that career. Your wildland experience will put you above most other guys coming straight out of fire school. One tthing I've noticed is that more and more fire departments are requiring higher level medical trainning. If you have the interest, time, and money to get either your EMT or Paramedic certs that will make you very attractive too.

I work for a state forestry agency as a forester and a wildland firefighter. The pay isn't as good as the federal jobs but it's full time and provides a lot of training opportunities. We end up having a lot of folks camping here for a few years to build up their certs and experience then jumping to the structure side. That might be a good route for you and at least keep you working year round for a bit.

All in all you're too young to be worried about what you should or shouldn't have achieved by now. Don't look at where others are at either, chances are a lot of the guys "rocking" their careers wish they could run off and fight forest fires in the wilderness every year (that stuff is fun).

Just keep your goals in mind and keep slogging.

I also started college later (26) and then I went to night school part time for 9 years before I graduated. It was a grind but you get through it.

[QuickTidal]

CowboyYojimbo, on 24 August 2015 - 01:43 AM, said:

Any other mid-to-late 20s, feeling like your behind or doing something wrong?

I'm 24 (25 in January), back home currently, single, and finding each year I lose more friends and family either from death or just moving. Then I'm seeing people I knew from school getting married or rocking their career.
I went to school for firefighting, and I just fight forest fires in the summer for 4 to 4 1/2 months then get unemployment payments while I try to dabble in writing and film or just "live". Fire halls either only hire full time and the competition is brutal. or they start you as a volunteer meaning have something to pay bills and live in that town already. So I have to pick a town, move and hope I get a position, that doesn't pay the bills, so it can evolve in to one that may. Wish I had someone telling me where to go.

I'm by no means dumb or socially inept, just my dream jobs (firefighter and writer) apparently suck and are a logistical nightmare, I don't meet many women I'd want to pursue past date 1, small towns I guess, and I've had some setbacks that werent my fault, a lot of death, bad gigs. Just feel alone these days, and like Im in a waiting room, waiting for life to truly start.

Don't normally vent publically like this but holy hell, can anyone relate? Did shit improve? Can't catch a break anymore.

Oh man, don't worry at all.

I didn't meet my (now) wife till I was 30 (nearly 31) and didn't get married till I was 38...and only now are we starting our family (with a baby on the way). I've had decent to middling jobs that pay the bills over the years but often ended up living a bit in my overdraft of my bank account to do so, and only now am I on the cusp of getting a family-supporting wage and moving forward in a career. I feel like I'm starting that next major phase of my life (family, kids, job, ect.) now. And I'm fine with that. My wife is the same way, she was happy to wait for these things.

Take this advice, enjoy your 20's. At 24 you should be relishing your youth. Don't feel pressured by those around you settling down early in their lives. The only thing I'd recommend is to take Amph's advice about a job, just keep filling your time and inching your way up...otherwise, with regards to the rest of your life...enjoy yourself. You're only in your 20's once! And though it's VEERY cliche to say it...everything moves faster and faster every year you age. In your 30's you'll WISH you experienced time like you did in your 20's...cause this shit is now flying by.

This post has been edited by QuickTidal: 26 August 2015 - 03:33 PM

[Tiste Simeon]

Those two reporters killed live on air... Tragic & heartbreaking. Not going to post the video here but it's out there.

[Nicodimas]

^ watched said video... The statement killed in cold blood has never been so appropiate.

Then you read the boyfriends Facebook share..

So tragic

[Gavril]

Exams and women are messing with my groove. Ever since I started university exams completly messed up my groove. Women started doing that about a year later. Only one week to go and I can finally enjoy a month long holiday!

And then compared to al the other posts I can only realize how stupid I sound...

This post has been edited by Gavril: 26 August 2015 - 06:00 PM

[Gredfallan Ale]

Gavril, on 26 August 2015 - 05:59 PM, said:

Exams and women are messing with my groove. Ever since I started university exams completly messed up my groove. Women started doing that about a year later. Only one week to go and I can finally enjoy a month long holiday!

And then compared to al the other posts I can only realize how stupid I sound...

Don't belittle yourself or your feelings too much. Exams can be pretty pressing, psychologically speaking, and women, well, let me just say that they make life interesting.*




*) I broke up with my ex, what is it, three months ago. We enjoyed a very good friendship prior to our relationship and we're trying to continue that. It seems to be working, but it does not help me getting over her. However, I would feel even worse if our friendship had ended as well.

[Tiste Simeon]

Nicodimas, on 26 August 2015 - 05:43 PM, said:

^ watched said video... The statement killed in cold blood has never been so appropiate.

Then you read the boyfriends Facebook share..

So tragic

Now he killed himself the stinking coward. Awful, horrid events.

[Gredfallan Ale]

Tiste Simeon, on 26 August 2015 - 06:33 PM, said:

Nicodimas, on 26 August 2015 - 05:43 PM, said:

^ watched said video... The statement killed in cold blood has never been so appropiate.

Then you read the boyfriends Facebook share..

So tragic

Now he killed himself the stinking coward. Awful, horrid events.

Yeah. I saw the video, it's crazy, really crazy and horrible.

I can't make anything of it, it just does not fit any cognitive scheme I have.

[QuickTidal]

Tiste Simeon, on 26 August 2015 - 06:33 PM, said:

Nicodimas, on 26 August 2015 - 05:43 PM, said:

^ watched said video... The statement killed in cold blood has never been so appropiate.

Then you read the boyfriends Facebook share..

So tragic

Now he killed himself the stinking coward. Awful, horrid events.

Apparent he only shot himself...but then he had a pulse and is in "life threatening" condition. So it's possible he'll still be made to pay for his crime...which I'd rather see. He should not get to take the cowards way out.

Now they say he's died in hospital. What a coward.

This post has been edited by QuickTidal: 26 August 2015 - 07:22 PM

[QuickTidal]

Do yourself a solid and don't watch the video. I didn't, but a friend did and said it's REALLY chilling and he can't unsee it now.

[Gredfallan Ale]

King Briar, on 26 August 2015 - 08:26 PM, said:

I watched a clip where as soon as the camera fell it cuts back to the Anchor being stunned. Obviously the thing kept rolling after. Did the shooter reload and go after her? I can't tell if she was hit in the clip I saw. That's some terrible shit to film. I can't imagine how traumatizing it's going to for that Anchor in the days to come.

There's another video from the shooter's point of view. He carried a camera. That's the one to avoid if you're sensitive to it.

[Morgoth]

Vengeance, on 26 August 2015 - 03:09 PM, said:

Lost Marine, on 26 August 2015 - 02:15 PM, said:

CowboyYojimbo, on 24 August 2015 - 01:43 AM, said:

Any other mid-to-late 20s, feeling like your behind or doing something wrong?

I'm 24 (25 in January), back home currently, single, and finding each year I lose more friends and family either from death or just moving. Then I'm seeing people I knew from school getting married or rocking their career.
I went to school for firefighting, and I just fight forest fires in the summer for 4 to 4 1/2 months then get unemployment payments while I try to dabble in writing and film or just "live". Fire halls either only hire full time and the competition is brutal. or they start you as a volunteer meaning have something to pay bills and live in that town already. So I have to pick a town, move and hope I get a position, that doesn't pay the bills, so it can evolve in to one that may. Wish I had someone telling me where to go.

I'm by no means dumb or socially inept, just my dream jobs (firefighter and writer) apparently suck and are a logistical nightmare, I don't meet many women I'd want to pursue past date 1, small towns I guess, and I've had some setbacks that werent my fault, a lot of death, bad gigs. Just feel alone these days, and like Im in a waiting room, waiting for life to truly start.

Don't normally vent publically like this but holy hell, can anyone relate? Did shit improve? Can't catch a break anymore.

Don't worry about being behind, I didn't even start college until I was 25. Got out of the Marine Corps and drifted for a bit before I finally found something that appealled to me and went to college for that career. Your wildland experience will put you above most other guys coming straight out of fire school. One tthing I've noticed is that more and more fire departments are requiring higher level medical trainning. If you have the interest, time, and money to get either your EMT or Paramedic certs that will make you very attractive too.

I work for a state forestry agency as a forester and a wildland firefighter. The pay isn't as good as the federal jobs but it's full time and provides a lot of training opportunities. We end up having a lot of folks camping here for a few years to build up their certs and experience then jumping to the structure side. That might be a good route for you and at least keep you working year round for a bit.

All in all you're too young to be worried about what you should or shouldn't have achieved by now. Don't look at where others are at either, chances are a lot of the guys "rocking" their careers wish they could run off and fight forest fires in the wilderness every year (that stuff is fun).

Just keep your goals in mind and keep slogging.

I also started college later (26) and then I went to night school part time for 9 years before I graduated. It was a grind but you get through it.

Well, unlike this guy, you were viciously murdered at the age of 25 and replaced by an alien scout for an intergalactic invasion force. Not really comparable situations.

[Puck]

Seems the season for feeling unsatisfied, which is what I came to moan about, but now my problems kind of feel misplayed..

Right. I'm going to go ahead anyway, because I'm not sure where else I could go.. So yeah, I took a couple of weeks off from the forum without being aware of that, but I think I'm reaching or have already reached some kind of low.. And I think I might be skirting depression. Though, admittedly, if that's skirting, I'm at it for at least the past year. I really don't know. Eh, it's not like I'm thinking of doing something stupid (that was last year), and I'm not particularly unhappy, but I chuck that up due to not remembering when I last was happy, so I'm kind of meh on the whole issue. Not striving for some kind of happiness, and I'm generally meh on most things people tell me are important. Family, relationships.. Meh. I've generally resigned myself to spending my life alone.

But what REALLY gets to me at the moment is how I feel deeply stuck where I am, like my life isn't moving anywhere. Not just not anywhere important, but simply not anywhere at all. I'm stuck job-wise and simply the thought of continuing like that DOES make me want to do stupid things. What I REALLY want to do isn't going anywhere, which only re-inforces my fear that I'm just deluding myself. And the fear just feeds upon itself and I spend days just wondering what's the point.

The problem is, of course, that I have to earn money somehow, so I'm kind of stuck with what I'm doing now, which is small-business advertising, flyers, posters, 'n shit. And every day, I try to push away the thought that I really, really, hate it. That's there's absolutely nothing in the world I hate more than doing that stuff. I have to really push myself just to open the programs, or get out of bed on days I know I have to send my client something. So I push it to tomorrow, and tomorrow again, and then do a shoddy job (which seems to be good enough, from what I can tell, but shoddy is shoddy - because I know it's shoddy and half-assed). I just can't motivate myself to do it. And my mother and her acquaintances keep telling other people I do that kind of stuff and finding clients for me, and I can't just say stop, please, in the name of everything, just stop. 'Cause money. And I can't pretend I cannot do graphics because I do the exact same stuff at my part-time job, where they tell me that there's a noticeable rise in sales since I've started doing the online banners 'n shit. At the same time, they refuse to let me work more hours - 'cause money. It's the same basic work, but at least the product's interesting and after a few years I know the company and product. They're currently hiring new people, but no, I can't work more hours - but please, we need ALL of that stuff done in the hours alloted to you.

It's just really frustrating. I can't leave this job, 'cause I'd then be wholly reliant on the commissions I'd rather puke than think about, but I feel like there's nothing to be gained at the job I can actually motivate myself for. Maybe it's because I started working there while I was still at uni, so I can't shake the image that I'm just a student. I can't tell. And all the while I feel so drained I have trouble mativating myself/finding the courage to persue what I really want.

The other half of my days I'm just too unmotivated/tired/listless to do anything, but that may have medical reasons and I hope it's going to get better sometime soon-ish. Studying and working two jobs made me neglect such niceties as health, so the last couple of months were filled with doc appointments and tests. Still, I wonder whether I should ask my doc for a referral to a psychotherapist. I need to break the cycle somehow, but without wreaking havoc with my halfway-mended relationship with my mother, which for now only works because I take on the commissions she keeps referring my way. I have this crazy idea that if I can prove that this work is not good for me.. but then again I may just be deluding myself and I need to get my shit together.

Or I'm just too deep in this to think clearly. I always thought that as long as I can draw stuff, anything, I can deal with everything else. Right now, I have no energy and no confidence to even pick up a pencil. I know it's not just me, a few of the people I studied with have trouble finding work, but among them, I'm the only one who can't rely on parents to help out with more than a place to live (and I have until May next year before I have to get out). So I can't just give up this whole advertising shit and put all my energy into finding other work.

Holy hell, this sounds so whiny.

Tl;dr: My life sucks job-wise and I think I should get some counselling but wonder if I'm over-reacting.

Oh, right, I also wanted to say sorry if I harked at anyone a bit too harshly lately. I have moment when I'm trying to kick myself into doing something and all I have for fuel right now is anger. Which is a bad counselor.

[CowboyYojimbo]

amphibian, on 25 August 2015 - 05:33 AM, said:

I think getting a bouncer job or a waitstaff job off the books during the off months will let you build enough of a pad to move to a bigger city.

You're young enough and healthy enough to be a firefighter, so go ahead and do that, try for a spot in whatever medium sized city appeals to you.

As for writing, what you may want to do is to practice for an hour a day. Pick a short story and hammer away at it. It'll most likely be junk, but the next will be better and so on. Then after a while, you'll want to write longer things and when you do that, you probably want to find a cheaper version of the Iowa Writer's Workshop. That's where you'll go through a crucible of sorts - getting fierce and occasionally undeserved criticism from your friends and potential rivals.

After you do that, write something great and look to see if you can get picked up by the same agents who rep people breaking onto the scene in whatever genre you're looking to break into.

Thanks alot!
I have the money to go anywhere, it's just a matter of somehow figuring that out. I've done pretty well saving up my income no matter how much I was making. I'm actually going to be coming in to some money by the years end - enough to buy a home or invest really well. I may even kickstart my film-side of writing by funding some things. I've heard of the Iowa Writer's Workshop - something like that may be just what I need for some extra kick. I don't have many people to read my work these days.
I take it you are of the writing fold?

Lost Marine, on 26 August 2015 - 02:15 PM, said:

Don't worry about being behind, I didn't even start college until I was 25. Got out of the Marine Corps and drifted for a bit before I finally found something that appealled to me and went to college for that career. Your wildland experience will put you above most other guys coming straight out of fire school. One tthing I've noticed is that more and more fire departments are requiring higher level medical trainning. If you have the interest, time, and money to get either your EMT or Paramedic certs that will make you very attractive too.

I work for a state forestry agency as a forester and a wildland firefighter. The pay isn't as good as the federal jobs but it's full time and provides a lot of training opportunities. We end up having a lot of folks camping here for a few years to build up their certs and experience then jumping to the structure side. That might be a good route for you and at least keep you working year round for a bit.
All in all you're too young to be worried about what you should or shouldn't have achieved by now. Don't look at where others are at either, chances are a lot of the guys "rocking" their careers wish they could run off and fight forest fires in the wilderness every year (that stuff is fun).

Just keep your goals in mind and keep slogging.

Thank you very much for the advice!
For medical I've been volunteering with St. John's Ambulance doing first-aid duties at public events. I got my AMFR which is a step below paramedic, I just can't do medication but either can firefighters so I think I'm good enough there. It's good to hear about others in my boat who made it.
That's true about the fun stuff. I have fought fires, worked on films, and backpacked Scotland in my 20s. Doing all of that is better than having settled in something I didnt want for stability. Good for you for doing the Marine Corp! You have my respect there. What region do you fight fire?
Thank you for the pick-me-up!

QuickTidal, on 26 August 2015 - 03:30 PM, said:

Oh man, don't worry at all.

I didn't meet my (now) wife till I was 30 (nearly 31) and didn't get married till I was 38...and only now are we starting our family (with a baby on the way). I've had decent to middling jobs that pay the bills over the years but often ended up living a bit in my overdraft of my bank account to do so, and only now am I on the cusp of getting a family-supporting wage and moving forward in a career. I feel like I'm starting that next major phase of my life (family, kids, job, ect.) now. And I'm fine with that. My wife is the same way, she was happy to wait for these things.

Take this advice, enjoy your 20's. At 24 you should be relishing your youth. Don't feel pressured by those around you settling down early in their lives. The only thing I'd recommend is to take Amph's advice about a job, just keep filling your time and inching your way up...otherwise, with regards to the rest of your life...enjoy yourself. You're only in your 20's once! And though it's VEERY cliche to say it...everything moves faster and faster every year you age. In your 30's you'll WISH you experienced time like you did in your 20's...cause this shit is now flying by.

Wow! Congratulations on the kid!
You've further cemented the impression I got from others being my worries are such a "young person problem" haha. I've come to realize I had all these sing-posts on my life. Career by 25 - Wife by 27 etc. etc. I'm definitely trying my best to enjoy the years while working towards things. The uncertainty of my career choices worry me but I guess I can take it in stride more.

******
You've all been very kind in my depressive rant. Leave it to Malazans to be the most compassionate.
Thank you for the advice

This post has been edited by CowboyYojimbo: 27 August 2015 - 04:50 AM

[Tiste Simeon]

Gredfallan Ale, on 26 August 2015 - 08:33 PM, said:

King Briar, on 26 August 2015 - 08:26 PM, said:

I watched a clip where as soon as the camera fell it cuts back to the Anchor being stunned. Obviously the thing kept rolling after. Did the shooter reload and go after her? I can't tell if she was hit in the clip I saw. That's some terrible shit to film. I can't imagine how traumatizing it's going to for that Anchor in the days to come.

There's another video from the shooter's point of view. He carried a camera. That's the one to avoid if you're sensitive to it.

Yeah I saw that. It was horrendous.

[Lizradusa]

Puckstein, on 26 August 2015 - 09:51 PM, said:

Seems the season for feeling unsatisfied, which is what I came to moan about, but now my problems kind of feel misplayed..

Right. I'm going to go ahead anyway, because I'm not sure where else I could go.. So yeah, I took a couple of weeks off from the forum without being aware of that, but I think I'm reaching or have already reached some kind of low.. And I think I might be skirting depression. Though, admittedly, if that's skirting, I'm at it for at least the past year. I really don't know. Eh, it's not like I'm thinking of doing something stupid (that was last year), and I'm not particularly unhappy, but I chuck that up due to not remembering when I last was happy, so I'm kind of meh on the whole issue. Not striving for some kind of happiness, and I'm generally meh on most things people tell me are important. Family, relationships.. Meh. I've generally resigned myself to spending my life alone.

But what REALLY gets to me at the moment is how I feel deeply stuck where I am, like my life isn't moving anywhere. Not just not anywhere important, but simply not anywhere at all. I'm stuck job-wise and simply the thought of continuing like that DOES make me want to do stupid things. What I REALLY want to do isn't going anywhere, which only re-inforces my fear that I'm just deluding myself. And the fear just feeds upon itself and I spend days just wondering what's the point.

The problem is, of course, that I have to earn money somehow, so I'm kind of stuck with what I'm doing now, which is small-business advertising, flyers, posters, 'n shit. And every day, I try to push away the thought that I really, really, hate it. That's there's absolutely nothing in the world I hate more than doing that stuff. I have to really push myself just to open the programs, or get out of bed on days I know I have to send my client something. So I push it to tomorrow, and tomorrow again, and then do a shoddy job (which seems to be good enough, from what I can tell, but shoddy is shoddy - because I know it's shoddy and half-assed). I just can't motivate myself to do it. And my mother and her acquaintances keep telling other people I do that kind of stuff and finding clients for me, and I can't just say stop, please, in the name of everything, just stop. 'Cause money. And I can't pretend I cannot do graphics because I do the exact same stuff at my part-time job, where they tell me that there's a noticeable rise in sales since I've started doing the online banners 'n shit. At the same time, they refuse to let me work more hours - 'cause money. It's the same basic work, but at least the product's interesting and after a few years I know the company and product. They're currently hiring new people, but no, I can't work more hours - but please, we need ALL of that stuff done in the hours alloted to you.

It's just really frustrating. I can't leave this job, 'cause I'd then be wholly reliant on the commissions I'd rather puke than think about, but I feel like there's nothing to be gained at the job I can actually motivate myself for. Maybe it's because I started working there while I was still at uni, so I can't shake the image that I'm just a student. I can't tell. And all the while I feel so drained I have trouble mativating myself/finding the courage to persue what I really want.

The other half of my days I'm just too unmotivated/tired/listless to do anything, but that may have medical reasons and I hope it's going to get better sometime soon-ish. Studying and working two jobs made me neglect such niceties as health, so the last couple of months were filled with doc appointments and tests. Still, I wonder whether I should ask my doc for a referral to a psychotherapist. I need to break the cycle somehow, but without wreaking havoc with my halfway-mended relationship with my mother, which for now only works because I take on the commissions she keeps referring my way. I have this crazy idea that if I can prove that this work is not good for me.. but then again I may just be deluding myself and I need to get my shit together.

Or I'm just too deep in this to think clearly. I always thought that as long as I can draw stuff, anything, I can deal with everything else. Right now, I have no energy and no confidence to even pick up a pencil. I know it's not just me, a few of the people I studied with have trouble finding work, but among them, I'm the only one who can't rely on parents to help out with more than a place to live (and I have until May next year before I have to get out). So I can't just give up this whole advertising shit and put all my energy into finding other work.

Holy hell, this sounds so whiny.

Tl;dr: My life sucks job-wise and I think I should get some counselling but wonder if I'm over-reacting.

Oh, right, I also wanted to say sorry if I harked at anyone a bit too harshly lately. I have moment when I'm trying to kick myself into doing something and all I have for fuel right now is anger. Which is a bad counselor.

Puck, if you need someone to listen to you, feel free to skype! Maybe I can offer a small perspective from completly outside.

[Gredfallan Ale]

@Puckstein:

I started replying, but then realized I couldn't say much but that I relate to a lot of what you're sharing with us. The only thing I can say is that it might help to start talking to someone about how you feel, just to get it off your chest and maybe gain a bit of insight as well. It always helps me to talk about how I feel and what I'm experiencing as I have to arrange things, build a narrative and, often, have to confront myself with some of the irrational cognitions I'm having. (That latter part for me is mostly about irrational anxieties, I'm very anxious of confrontations.)

You might also want to talk about your future, start thinking about alternatives or other positive plans to undertake. Sure, you can try to make your dreams come true, but, let's face it, not everyone is going to end up with their dream job. One of my best friends was unemployed for almost two years after graduating, she was stuck and did not really see a future in her preferred profession. She experienced similar emotions as you are experiencing now. When she finally came to terms with that fact, she started looking ahead again. She went looking for alternative fields she might like, digging up information on home education courses and going back to university. Now she's in the process of getting another degree (distant learning courses) and already has a part-time job in that new field. She has plans again, motivation, and most of all, she's enjoying her outlook on life again. Another friend pretty much did the same, in his mid-30s, he couldn't get a job in his field (organisational psychology), decided to something totally different (highschool math teacher), picked up courses and is now working for a highschool as a math teacher.

They do have one thing in common, they started talking about their situation and how they felt. It took a while, but then they started seeing opportunities again, started making plans or looking for alternatives (courses, &c.) and started feeling like they had something to care about again. Something to work towards.

This post has been edited by Gredfallan Ale: 27 August 2015 - 10:44 AM

[Lost Marine]

CowboyYojimbo, on 27 August 2015 - 04:49 AM, said:

amphibian, on 25 August 2015 - 05:33 AM, said:

I think getting a bouncer job or a waitstaff job off the books during the off months will let you build enough of a pad to move to a bigger city.

You're young enough and healthy enough to be a firefighter, so go ahead and do that, try for a spot in whatever medium sized city appeals to you.

As for writing, what you may want to do is to practice for an hour a day. Pick a short story and hammer away at it. It'll most likely be junk, but the next will be better and so on. Then after a while, you'll want to write longer things and when you do that, you probably want to find a cheaper version of the Iowa Writer's Workshop. That's where you'll go through a crucible of sorts - getting fierce and occasionally undeserved criticism from your friends and potential rivals.

After you do that, write something great and look to see if you can get picked up by the same agents who rep people breaking onto the scene in whatever genre you're looking to break into.

Thanks alot!
I have the money to go anywhere, it's just a matter of somehow figuring that out. I've done pretty well saving up my income no matter how much I was making. I'm actually going to be coming in to some money by the years end - enough to buy a home or invest really well. I may even kickstart my film-side of writing by funding some things. I've heard of the Iowa Writer's Workshop - something like that may be just what I need for some extra kick. I don't have many people to read my work these days.
I take it you are of the writing fold?

Lost Marine, on 26 August 2015 - 02:15 PM, said:

Don't worry about being behind, I didn't even start college until I was 25. Got out of the Marine Corps and drifted for a bit before I finally found something that appealled to me and went to college for that career. Your wildland experience will put you above most other guys coming straight out of fire school. One tthing I've noticed is that more and more fire departments are requiring higher level medical trainning. If you have the interest, time, and money to get either your EMT or Paramedic certs that will make you very attractive too.

I work for a state forestry agency as a forester and a wildland firefighter. The pay isn't as good as the federal jobs but it's full time and provides a lot of training opportunities. We end up having a lot of folks camping here for a few years to build up their certs and experience then jumping to the structure side. That might be a good route for you and at least keep you working year round for a bit.
All in all you're too young to be worried about what you should or shouldn't have achieved by now. Don't look at where others are at either, chances are a lot of the guys "rocking" their careers wish they could run off and fight forest fires in the wilderness every year (that stuff is fun).

Just keep your goals in mind and keep slogging.

Thank you very much for the advice!
For medical I've been volunteering with St. John's Ambulance doing first-aid duties at public events. I got my AMFR which is a step below paramedic, I just can't do medication but either can firefighters so I think I'm good enough there. It's good to hear about others in my boat who made it.
That's true about the fun stuff. I have fought fires, worked on films, and backpacked Scotland in my 20s. Doing all of that is better than having settled in something I didnt want for stability. Good for you for doing the Marine Corp! You have my respect there. What region do you fight fire?
Thank you for the pick-me-up!

QuickTidal, on 26 August 2015 - 03:30 PM, said:

Oh man, don't worry at all.

I didn't meet my (now) wife till I was 30 (nearly 31) and didn't get married till I was 38...and only now are we starting our family (with a baby on the way). I've had decent to middling jobs that pay the bills over the years but often ended up living a bit in my overdraft of my bank account to do so, and only now am I on the cusp of getting a family-supporting wage and moving forward in a career. I feel like I'm starting that next major phase of my life (family, kids, job, ect.) now. And I'm fine with that. My wife is the same way, she was happy to wait for these things.

Take this advice, enjoy your 20's. At 24 you should be relishing your youth. Don't feel pressured by those around you settling down early in their lives. The only thing I'd recommend is to take Amph's advice about a job, just keep filling your time and inching your way up...otherwise, with regards to the rest of your life...enjoy yourself. You're only in your 20's once! And though it's VEERY cliche to say it...everything moves faster and faster every year you age. In your 30's you'll WISH you experienced time like you did in your 20's...cause this shit is now flying by.

Wow! Congratulations on the kid!
You've further cemented the impression I got from others being my worries are such a "young person problem" haha. I've come to realize I had all these sing-posts on my life. Career by 25 - Wife by 27 etc. etc. I'm definitely trying my best to enjoy the years while working towards things. The uncertainty of my career choices worry me but I guess I can take it in stride more.

******
You've all been very kind in my depressive rant. Leave it to Malazans to be the most compassionate.
Thank you for the advice

It sounds like you have your stuff together. Dreams, skills, and discipline will take you far. One further piece of advice though, don't buy a house at your age unless it's an investment you intend to rent out under the care of a management company. Nothing ties you down like a house and it makes it far harder to take advantage of opportunities in other places. I bought a house the first place I worked and now I've moved multiple times and still haven't been able to sell it. Put the money for the down payment in a good secure short term investment and roll it over until you decide where you're going to settle. Especially if you want to be a writer and end up having to follow the dream.

I'm in Florida so I mostly fight fire in the southeast although we've been doing a lot of western deployments lately. It's a fun spot, I like chasing alligators away from the pumps.