Malazan Empire: 1 Word Story: lets write an EPIC! - Malazan Empire

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1 Word Story: lets write an EPIC!

#501 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

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Posted 02 January 2009 - 12:47 AM

PROLOGUE

Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone.
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubatably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existantly.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. " WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


0

#502 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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Posted 02 January 2009 - 01:02 AM

PROLOGUE

Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone.
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubatably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existantly.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. " WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE
souls are for wimps
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#503 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

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Posted 02 January 2009 - 09:26 AM

PROLOGUE

Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone.
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubatably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existantly.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. " WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING

(Saw right through you Frookie)
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


0

#504 User is offline   D'rek 

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Posted 03 January 2009 - 04:55 PM

PROLOGUE

Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone.
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubatably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existantly.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. " WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE

View Postworrywort, on 14 September 2012 - 08:07 PM, said:

I kinda love it when D'rek unleashes her nerd wrath, as I knew she would here. Sorry innocent bystanders, but someone's gotta be the kindling.
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#505 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

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Posted 04 January 2009 - 11:34 AM

PROLOGUE

Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone.
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubatably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existantly.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. " WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


0

#506 User is offline   inpsyze 

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Posted 04 January 2009 - 05:03 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. “WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY

This post has been edited by inpsyze: 04 January 2009 - 05:03 PM

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#507 User is offline   D'rek 

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Posted 04 January 2009 - 05:14 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

View Postworrywort, on 14 September 2012 - 08:07 PM, said:

I kinda love it when D'rek unleashes her nerd wrath, as I knew she would here. Sorry innocent bystanders, but someone's gotta be the kindling.
0

#508 User is offline   frookenhauer 

  • Mortal Sword
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    Writing

Posted 04 January 2009 - 07:33 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?"
souls are for wimps
0

#509 User is offline   D'rek 

  • Consort of High House Mafia
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Posted 04 January 2009 - 10:50 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said

View Postworrywort, on 14 September 2012 - 08:07 PM, said:

I kinda love it when D'rek unleashes her nerd wrath, as I knew she would here. Sorry innocent bystanders, but someone's gotta be the kindling.
0

#510 User is offline   eekwibble 

  • Only...
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  • Joined: 21-March 08
  • Location:Manchestoh
  • Interests:West Haaaaaaaaaaam!!!!!

Posted 04 January 2009 - 11:28 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo
QUOTE (amphibian @ Nov 11 2008) <Rake himself was a huge weight inside Draconus and he didn't go in with an army.>
0

#511 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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    Writing

Posted 04 January 2009 - 11:45 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing
souls are for wimps
0

#512 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

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  • Interests:Dungeons and Dragons, and the odd caramel slice.
  • The AIJman cometh

Posted 05 January 2009 - 01:44 AM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


0

#513 User is offline   D'rek 

  • Consort of High House Mafia
  • Group: Super Moderators
  • Posts: 14,617
  • Joined: 08-August 07
  • Location::

Posted 05 January 2009 - 04:06 AM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of

View Postworrywort, on 14 September 2012 - 08:07 PM, said:

I kinda love it when D'rek unleashes her nerd wrath, as I knew she would here. Sorry innocent bystanders, but someone's gotta be the kindling.
0

#514 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

  • The Recidivist
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  • Interests:Dungeons and Dragons, and the odd caramel slice.
  • The AIJman cometh

Posted 05 January 2009 - 09:54 AM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


0

#515 User is offline   frookenhauer 

  • Mortal Sword
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    Writing

Posted 05 January 2009 - 10:39 AM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules?
souls are for wimps
0

#516 User is offline   D'rek 

  • Consort of High House Mafia
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Posted 05 January 2009 - 12:33 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I

View Postworrywort, on 14 September 2012 - 08:07 PM, said:

I kinda love it when D'rek unleashes her nerd wrath, as I knew she would here. Sorry innocent bystanders, but someone's gotta be the kindling.
0

#517 User is offline   frookenhauer 

  • Mortal Sword
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  • Posts: 1,113
  • Joined: 11-July 08
  • Location:England
  • Interests:Women
    Money
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    Writing

Posted 05 January 2009 - 02:18 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I Think
souls are for wimps
0

#518 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

  • The Recidivist
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  • Joined: 17-January 08
  • Location:Oz
  • Interests:Dungeons and Dragons, and the odd caramel slice.
  • The AIJman cometh

Posted 06 January 2009 - 10:14 AM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

IThinkMetaphysically
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


0

#519 User is offline   frookenhauer 

  • Mortal Sword
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  • Posts: 1,113
  • Joined: 11-July 08
  • Location:England
  • Interests:Women
    Money
    AI
    Writing

Posted 06 January 2009 - 10:37 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore
souls are for wimps
0

#520 User is offline   Cold Iron 

  • I'll have some lasagna
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 2,026
  • Joined: 18-January 06

Posted 06 January 2009 - 10:51 PM

PROLOGUE

"Cutter, bar me please" said Bah'humbug. "No way, porcupines in drag costumes are ugly! But, considering the way they lurk when mutants attach fish-heads to their scrotum pubes, eventually they will...URGH...!"
Mezla stroked multiple heads of weed that once were used by a vegetarian Tyrant to alleviate the headache caused by spoiled medicine.
"Why are Jaghut so awesome?"
Bah'humbug incoherently tried to explain. He had trouble remembering what Jaghut were.
Mezla farted on him so loudly Bah'humbug applauded.
Neighbours glanced enviously, in colourful pyjamas, with rage in their boots.

Who could possibly write a shittier one than this elegant piece dedicated to Shadowthrone?
Speculation about the way in which 'rage' constitutes footwear fillings, however nonsensical, ridiculously made cussers implode.
Was he insane?

Indubitably. Companions agreed adamantly that insanity was necessary. So filled up was Tattersail's warren, Hood's breath floated in the mountain keep insidiously. The overarching ramifications were marginalised by Anomander levelling accusations at Caladan's incompetent implementation of ballistas. Dancer loved Oktoberfest, beer, transvestites, lederhosen & colonoscopies non-existently.

The transvestites lifted Lisheo up. Inside the cake-like ascendant's desserts, Lisheo vomited like a bhederin, obliviously happy. Meanwhile, Tiste sucked-up to Apsalar without foreplay, oblivious kumquats danced Grief into the ground. Alas, reindeers pranced with mincing roadkill sandwiches. Gazumped, Gertrude bought 2.65 Pounds of rampant fruitiliciously. Errant willing, doggystyle swimming was absurdly successful considering the alternatives...

Saemankelyk-Man was cavorting. So, around Travellers head, he killed winged insects, gleefully sang bawdy lovesongs and catapulted Bellurdan into Bah'humbug's harem where Corabb prostrated himself deliriously onto several monkeys impersonating Barry White. Suddenly Greymane pirouetted Gandalf off kilter whilst offering banal glances above a huge clenched fist.

"THAT WILL MAKE MASSIVE HOLES IN ENSCORCELLED, ZIPPERED PANTALOONS, MEZLA!!!" ejaculated Frookenhauer, whilst animated chickboys handcuffed Bah'humbug to Barry White. D'rek vacillated because Voldemort grabbed his/her medulla oblongata exothermically. Meanwhile, back at the batcave, Robin backed the proletarian Letherii handmaiden because he longed for slippery bedroom fun between himself, Nelson, Mappo, Dame Edna Everage, and Saemankelyk-Man. Batman wasn't too sexy without Brood making dinner.

Meanwhile, Cutter bar'd a cantaloupe that had been waiting ripely for Barry White to sing "Can't get enough of your love, babe" simultaneously with Rammstein's "Du riechst so gut." Barry-oke was sweeping the nation.

"We should rejoice, fellow Malazanites," preached Iskaral, "for skinning my bhokarala with ENSORCELLED, petrified, zippered, crotchless panties has caused massive tectonic disturbances!" Dancing wombats whirled around brazenly, suggestive chipmunks screaming that spiders and witches weren't helping Cutter decide which Melanesian harlot masturbated longest.

Meanwhile, SaemanKelyk-Man farted wetly, powerfully, explosively! Masonry indirectly bar'd unsmiling Bah'humbug with barbecued rafters FULL of pigeon SHIT.

"Incontinent!" screamed Iskaral incandescently, "Bah'humbub sniggered at me!"


CHAPTER ONE

Preening my whiskers, I waxed painfully in Iskaral's fortuitously large boudoir alongside Cutter and Pussy Man coalesced amorphously together into Barry White. "Woe isn't that necessary for feeling delightful interior peace modulation pygmies," Grockledeeboo said. "I sexualized a latent shrub!" Treeshagging for those 'win' threads that persevere throughout thousands, nay googolplexes and Graham's Numbers of Soletakenites' forums awakens to myself salacious nightmares. "WHO DARES TRANSMOGRIFY BARRY WHITE INTO LION-O INSTEAD OF A DISCOMBOBULATED SMART-PHONE SLOBBERING ABOVE COWL'S SLIMY WHISKERS???!!!"

"WAT?", said Grockledeeboo, rubbing millions of incanabula granules.

I think metaphysically, therefore I
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