Help
i think a call is the most personal. You can hear the person's voice and emotion, and is more real. also, they can immediately respond and can actually discuss it. I was in a room with a girl ranting about how she was mad because a guy broke up with her in a text message. What made her mad was that it was impersonal and a little cowardly. Obviously this situation is a little different, but the same basic stuff still applies.
What do I do?
#22
Optimus Prime 
- Daylight Oblivion
-
- Group: Malaz Regular
- Posts: 4,425
- Joined: 22-March 07
- Location:San Diego, California
- Interests:Ranting and Raving. Being the biggest Liberal on this forum. Arguing with Cold Iron (and winning). Writing (struggling right now), reading, Georgia Bulldog FOOTBALL!<br /><br />And the lades, of course, always the ladies ;)
Posted 26 February 2008 - 11:19 PM
I called him and he never called me back. i don't know if he chose not to or is just dealing with all the shit. I'm not taking it personal though. Some people shut down when they lose someone.
#24
Optimus Prime
- Daylight Oblivion
-
- Group: Malaz Regular
- Posts: 4,425
- Joined: 22-March 07
- Location:San Diego, California
- Interests:Ranting and Raving. Being the biggest Liberal on this forum. Arguing with Cold Iron (and winning). Writing (struggling right now), reading, Georgia Bulldog FOOTBALL!<br /><br />And the lades, of course, always the ladies ;)
Posted 26 February 2008 - 11:45 PM
I've thought about it.
I'm off today, guess I have nothing better to do. I guess I'll post a copy of it when I'm done.
I'm off today, guess I have nothing better to do. I guess I'll post a copy of it when I'm done.
#25
ShadowOwl
- High Fist
-
- Group: Malaz Regular
- Posts: 331
- Joined: 01-April 07
- Location:Canada
Posted 27 February 2008 - 12:10 AM
A card of condolence to the family, with a hand written letter inside to your old friend would seem to give you the best chance to get your message to him in the least intrusive manner. Putting your phone and email address in the letter would put the decision about communication between you in his court. Then you would know you have done what you could and abide by his decision.
"Yes, the owl was deliberate in each and every instance, and yes, it was intended to work on multiple levels." (from SE's Dec 09 Q&A)
#26
Optimus Prime
- Daylight Oblivion
-
- Group: Malaz Regular
- Posts: 4,425
- Joined: 22-March 07
- Location:San Diego, California
- Interests:Ranting and Raving. Being the biggest Liberal on this forum. Arguing with Cold Iron (and winning). Writing (struggling right now), reading, Georgia Bulldog FOOTBALL!<br /><br />And the lades, of course, always the ladies ;)
Posted 27 February 2008 - 12:12 AM
I see your point.
Sometimes bitter feelings are just so hard to overcome...even when something more serious should put it all in perspective.
Sometimes bitter feelings are just so hard to overcome...even when something more serious should put it all in perspective.
#27
ShadowOwl
- High Fist
-
- Group: Malaz Regular
- Posts: 331
- Joined: 01-April 07
- Location:Canada
Posted 27 February 2008 - 12:17 AM
If you don't say you are sorry for his loss, or just that you are thinking of him and wish there was something you could do to help, it will always nag at you, that you should have said something. What you are probably afraid of is the confrontation you are imagining. It is pretty normal, but I've always found what I imagined would happen never does and it works out far better than expected. Just send the card saying thinking of you all, and the note saying a few lines, that's all. Don't mention the argument you had, it doesn't matter anymore.
You'll feel so much better, even if you never hear from him.
You'll feel so much better, even if you never hear from him.
"Yes, the owl was deliberate in each and every instance, and yes, it was intended to work on multiple levels." (from SE's Dec 09 Q&A)
#28
wolf_2099
- First Sword
-
- Group: Malaz Regular
- Posts: 666
- Joined: 28-August 07
- I like cake.
Posted 27 February 2008 - 01:53 AM
It's been said, but a low key, I know we haven't talked, but I heard about your step dad and I am sorry over the phone.
You don't need to say anything else, if he wants to respond to that, he will.
You don't need to say anything else, if he wants to respond to that, he will.
"HAIL THE MARINES!"
#29
Optimus Prime
- Daylight Oblivion
-
- Group: Malaz Regular
- Posts: 4,425
- Joined: 22-March 07
- Location:San Diego, California
- Interests:Ranting and Raving. Being the biggest Liberal on this forum. Arguing with Cold Iron (and winning). Writing (struggling right now), reading, Georgia Bulldog FOOTBALL!<br /><br />And the lades, of course, always the ladies ;)
Posted 27 February 2008 - 02:17 AM
Working up an email right now...trying to make it short and to the point. It's been a couple of weeks so I'm thinking he's ready to talk now.
#30
wolf_2099
- First Sword
-
- Group: Malaz Regular
- Posts: 666
- Joined: 28-August 07
- I like cake.
Posted 27 February 2008 - 02:23 AM
Xander;264189 said:
Working up an email right now...trying to make it short and to the point. It's been a couple of weeks so I'm thinking he's ready to talk now.
I'd say a phone call is more in order, someone died.
An e-mail is somewhat insulting I think.
"HAIL THE MARINES!"
