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My name is Malaclypse and I'm a madman & I need your help!

#181 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 10 September 2016 - 07:24 AM

View PostRaymond Luxury Yacht, on 10 September 2016 - 07:11 AM, said:

Baked sweet potatoes have a higher glycemic index than a regular white potato. You have to boil them to reap the Low sugar benefits.


Holy shitblack spunk, you seem to be right! "These dramatic differences come from the way the starches in sweet potatoes gelatinize during cooking. Foods that turn viscous, or jelly-like, in your digestive tract have a lower GI because the gelatinous substance slows the release of the nutrients in the food. Baking your sweet potatoes instead of boiling them changes the quality of their starches and transforms this root vegetable from a moderate-GI food to a high GI-food."

So in place of the absurdity of "fries" that are baked rather than fried... I shall request my "sweet" "potato" "fries" be boiled.

Though in all seriousness---the counterexamples provided by European and East Asian cultures (the "French paradox"---that they eat sandwiches, and bread; the East Asian paradox---that they eat white rice) demonstrate that "LGI is the One True Way to not being morbidly obese for non-genetic reasons!" is false (even though I've been doing LGI pretty faithfully for about the last 7 years now, and "lost" and "kept off" about 60 pounds over the period---male six-packs aren't that rare, but a six-pack *underneath* still-visible stretch-mark-scars... probably is).

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 10 September 2016 - 07:39 AM

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#182 User is offline   amphibian 

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Posted 10 September 2016 - 12:05 PM

There's a rising problem of diabetes in South Asia due to the increased consumption of white rice.

Used to be that basmati was not actually super common and more people ate wild rice. Now almost everybody wants basmati and they can get it.
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#183 User is offline   Lady Bliss 

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Posted 10 September 2016 - 02:19 PM

I'm more of a savory fan than sweet... Baked sweet potatoes with chili and cheddar cheese.
"If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die? And if you wrong us shall we not revenge?" - Shylock
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#184 User is offline   Malaclypse 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 05:36 AM

OK I'm here and Imma try to catch up with the relentless spam in this thread and not get too angry about the pointlessness of the majority of your offerings.

#185 User is offline   EmperorMagus 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 05:45 AM

View PostMalaclypse, on 11 September 2016 - 05:36 AM, said:

OK I'm here and Imma try to catch up with the relentless spam in this thread and not get too angry about the pointlessness of the majority of your offerings.


Mal, do you think I'm suited to pursuing a legal career?
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#186 User is offline   Malaclypse 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 05:59 AM

View PostGorefest, on 04 September 2016 - 07:47 AM, said:

View PostMalaclypse, on 04 September 2016 - 06:29 AM, said:

Our species is almost certainly doomed in the long term if left to our own devices so the only chance to avert this is strong AI (or aliens of course). The broken-down idealist in me says it's all to play for, there's still a chance. I'm a pretty cynical bastard but they just cracked Go/Wei chi/Baduk which was an impossibility when I was in my 20's and I count that as a serious milestone. The way it was explained to me was that a human was untouchable at whole-board evaluation. In the Game of Go, you have 361 points on the board - you can play absolutely anywhere and in the same way that 19th century anthropologists said that primates just couldn't make tools or modify tools or make tools specifically for the purpose of modifying other tools and had to backtrack and apologize for being wrong about all that shit. The machine is coming and for myself, I reckon the best possible future for the human species is to have our consciousness uploaded into machines. If we can't achieve that then our legacy will be our machines that live on after our extinction and we should plan for that as well. Verdict: Almost certainly doomed, and deservedly so. What an outrageous mob of cunts we've been all this time. It's shocking and embarrassing.



Meh. Everyone keeps saying this, but objectively speaking as a biological entity we are an incredibly succesful species. I don't think moral bankrupcy or destructive tendencies necessarily equate ultimate extinction. We have been utter dicks to each other throughout history and have committed mutual extinction on a massive scale unparallelled by any other species on the planet, but we currently have more people than ever before and we are doing better as a species than we have in the past 20,000 years from a biological and reproductive viewpoint. We certainly are not doomed as a species, if anything we'll be crawling and befouling other planets before this millennium is through.


Interesting. So you feel like everything is proceeding as it should, correct? First of all, there is no 'objectively speaking' - you cannot escape your perspective so the surety you seem to feel is bankrupt. You have no right to any species of surety about the future. We are in new territory with every passing moment. You seem to be claiming that because we've been so outrageously successful thusfar, we should expect to continue being similarly successful but this is a game with observable limits. What do we do when the things we need to support our current lifestyle just vanish from our little ball of rock? Will we even make it to that point? Far and away the greatest current existential threat to the human species is nuclear apocalypse and that has a place in the dark recesses of all of our minds. What would you do if those bombs dropped? I think Mezla is right, the smart thing to do is to be at ground zero and be loudly vaporized. For me, I feel it's my duty to survive as long as possible and to be prepared for the worst by extension. In my considered opinion, you are deluding yourself as to the efficacy of our species. I await your rejoinder.

This post has been edited by Malaclypse: 11 September 2016 - 06:00 AM


#187 User is offline   Malaclypse 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 06:04 AM

View PostGust Hubb, on 04 September 2016 - 02:07 PM, said:

View PostMalaclypse, on 04 September 2016 - 07:12 AM, said:

View PostGust Hubb, on 03 September 2016 - 12:46 AM, said:




Seriously? You contribute to this thread with an embedded music video and no comment? What the fuck are we to make of that? I like the song and I don't mind listening to it but it's odd to just interject in that way, isn't it? The weirdest thing for me is how fucking awkward people are.


If the simple subtlety and interpretative complexity, depending on the person's state of mind and worldviews, of my post escapes you, that is beyond my supernatural abilities to help engender realization or enlightenment in yourself. I apologize for not providing a written, or even diagrammatic, exploration of all the potential meanings and innuendo presented in this work of art, but I assure you that expectations should be adjusted to continued allusiveness characterized by dual, nay triple, meanings, obscure references, and vague commentary when it comes to my posts to you, which gauging your usual bellicose and crass dialogue may become all the more frequent.

Welcome back.


LOL, you remain an insufferable tosspot. Congrats.

#188 User is offline   Malaclypse 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 06:22 AM

View PostGorefest, on 05 September 2016 - 01:08 AM, said:

Again, I don't buy it. Any nation out for whole-scale destruction is going to be isolated and pounded upon by other nations. Any group of individuals out to cause large-scale mayhem will want to preserve themselves and therefore make sure that at least some people survive. And finally the suicidal nutcases are usually isolated incidents or loners in which case they lack the scale and impact for wholesale destruction, or it is organisations like ISIS who get fanatics to blow themselves up but the people behind it want to live to see a new world and they need people for that. Nuclear bombs will leave survivors, deadly viruses will leave survivors. Nobody is going to willfully destroy a planet that they themselves are on or if they do they lack the followers to achieve a global impact. 100% termination of the species is simply not realistic. The only way to manage that is through a cataclysmic event (big rock from outer space or sun collapse) or accidental termination such as destroying the ozone layer. And even in the latter event you'll probably have some underground survivors. Or some sort of sterility virus, but again with the current state of human medicine we may even be able to find a solution to that.


You don't understand people. We are eminently capable of destroying this place and if you imagine otherwise, you are fooling yourself. I think it might be useful for you and I to have a private conversation about this because I know where you're coming from, it's nice to believe that the people around you would make the right choice if they were pressed but, with Brexit, we know that's not the case. A racist underclass has been created in both the United Kingdom and America - well to be honest, it's always existed in America and if you can motivate those people to vote you get Trump and it's madness.The current political strife in America is deliciously similar to the most outrageous Roman political antics from history. I would giggle my ass off if Trump waded into the ocean with a squad of Navy SEALs and ordered them to conquer the sea. That's how fucking crazy it has become down there. We tend to get Cascadian Americans which is a blessing because they tend to be forward-thinking liberals and we get along just fine. Gorefest, honestly, you just lack a firm grasp of the facts but I forgive you for that. If you feel that you have a position that you can defend then we should continue via PM. Nothing would please me more. All of my best friends have given up, quite frankly and I crave fresh meat.

#189 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 06:35 AM

View PostMalaclypse, on 11 September 2016 - 06:22 AM, said:

View PostGorefest, on 05 September 2016 - 01:08 AM, said:

Again, I don't buy it. Any nation out for whole-scale destruction is going to be isolated and pounded upon by other nations. Any group of individuals out to cause large-scale mayhem will want to preserve themselves and therefore make sure that at least some people survive. And finally the suicidal nutcases are usually isolated incidents or loners in which case they lack the scale and impact for wholesale destruction, or it is organisations like ISIS who get fanatics to blow themselves up but the people behind it want to live to see a new world and they need people for that. Nuclear bombs will leave survivors, deadly viruses will leave survivors. Nobody is going to willfully destroy a planet that they themselves are on or if they do they lack the followers to achieve a global impact. 100% termination of the species is simply not realistic. The only way to manage that is through a cataclysmic event (big rock from outer space or sun collapse) or accidental termination such as destroying the ozone layer. And even in the latter event you'll probably have some underground survivors. Or some sort of sterility virus, but again with the current state of human medicine we may even be able to find a solution to that.


You don't understand people. We are eminently capable of destroying this place and if you imagine otherwise, you are fooling yourself. I think it might be useful for you and I to have a private conversation about this because I know where you're coming from, it's nice to believe that the people around you would make the right choice if they were pressed but, with Brexit, we know that's not the case. A racist underclass has been created in both the United Kingdom and America - well to be honest, it's always existed in America and if you can motivate those people to vote you get Trump and it's madness.The current political strife in America is deliciously similar to the most outrageous Roman political antics from history. I would giggle my ass off if Trump waded into the ocean with a squad of Navy SEALs and ordered them to conquer the sea. That's how fucking crazy it has become down there. We tend to get Cascadian Americans which is a blessing because they tend to be forward-thinking liberals and we get along just fine. Gorefest, honestly, you just lack a firm grasp of the facts but I forgive you for that. If you feel that you have a position that you can defend then we should continue via PM. Nothing would please me more. All of my best friends have given up, quite frankly and I crave fresh meat.


Just as past near-extinction-level events caused rapid human progress (see https://en.wikipedia...astrophe_theory for example---or the Black Plague) in the past, they suggest the potential for vastly accelerated development of transhumanist adaptations (if they aren't happening already in private).

It's highly unlikely that *all* human life would be wiped out in a single moment (or even one fateful, classic, tragic day: "Le jour n'est pas plus pur que le fond de mon nu coeur"). Therefore:

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#190 User is offline   Malaclypse 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 06:43 AM

View PostGrimjust Bearegular, on 06 September 2016 - 11:21 AM, said:

I had tæcos for dinner yesterday.



How is this helping Mal, exactly?


I have a question for you, Mal! How the hell do I know if a guy likes me? Is there some way I can deconstruct all his messages and find some sort of proof? Also, are long-distance relationships viable?


I struggle with these questions because I wonder first of all if you're attempting to take the piss out of me because you know that I must believe that long-distance relationships are viable because I met the woman whom I would burn the world for on this very forum. I conclude that you're probably taking the piss but I'm going to answer you honestly anyway: All a young man does is chase pussy. Fullstop. You may not have seen this but I have and it's important. In a herd of cows you have a bull or maybe two and all they're doing is sticking close to the cows. The cows decide what the herd is doing that day - the bull(s) just follow. They're only function is to impregnate the cows, which they are naturally motivated to do and to get in the way of danger and thus protect the truly important members of the herd. That's how I manage my relationship with my wife. I'll do the hard things, if and when they become necessary - I want her to remain as carefree and fancy-free as possible for as long as possible - I plan for the worst. Long story short, if he's trying to get into your panties, he might really like you or he might be a soulless wankrag - it's up to you to tell the difference, nobody can do that for you. Good luck :killingme:

#191 User is offline   Malaclypse 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 06:52 AM

View PostVengeance, on 06 September 2016 - 08:34 PM, said:

View PostSecret Startaker, on 06 September 2016 - 08:13 PM, said:


And that's fine if he wants to roll that way, but is certainly not the standard I expect from a 4 star poster.



What's a 4 star poster?


What an offensive notion! You expect better of a four-star poster do you? Something more in line with your own bankrupt philosophy? Hah! I've taken note of you my friend. Easy meat is not as common as it should be but you're a real gem :killingme:

#192 User is offline   Malaclypse 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 07:15 AM

View Postamphibian, on 07 September 2016 - 01:58 AM, said:

I envision Malaclypse coming back to this thread and becoming so enraged that he tosses his tablet into the couch before going outside to start a fight with Canadian geese.


We should meet. We're on the same continent now. It's going to have to be you that travels because I won't go to Amurrica Crazy-Land under any circumstances. There were times in the writing comp that I felt close to you, a sense of sameness and my every contact with you since then has been negative so if you want to come, you will have to pay but I think it would be good for you - we could work some things out. Four days would do it I reckon. I don't use tablets or laptops. I'm either on my glorious desktop with two monitors or I'm on my phone - I have no interest in tablets and, given all the time I spent in England, I am overcome with the cheapest sort of pride when I see Canada Geese (NOT Canadian Geese) - in fact I've defended Canada Geese against wild Swans where we lived in England. I've actually charged into the water in defence of Canada Geese because Swans are horrible cunts towards other Swans, let alone other birds - a most obnoxious breed. There was one time I called the wildlife authority because a pair of Swans was abusing a lost cygnet, having pushed the parents out of the little lake. It was awful. That being said, Canada Geese would behave the same way if they were the biggest birds on the lake. I've shot, killed and ate many Canada Geese and I would do so again just as soon as I can get a firearms permit but, BUT, when I see one flying alone I have pity for them because I know they mate for life and I am the same.

#193 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 07:19 AM

View PostGrimjust Bearegular, on 06 September 2016 - 11:21 AM, said:

I have a question for you, Mal! How the hell do I know if a guy likes me? Is there some way I can deconstruct all his messages and find some sort of proof?


I got this....


Ask him.
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#194 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 07:20 AM

View PostMalaclypse, on 11 September 2016 - 07:15 AM, said:

View Postamphibian, on 07 September 2016 - 01:58 AM, said:

I envision Malaclypse coming back to this thread and becoming so enraged that he tosses his tablet into the couch before going outside to start a fight with Canadian geese.


We should meet. We're on the same continent now. It's going to have to be you that travels because I won't go to Amurrica Crazy-Land under any circumstances. There were times in the writing comp that I felt close to you, a sense of sameness and my every contact with you since then has been negative so if you want to come, you will have to pay but I think it would be good for you - we could work some things out. Four days would do it I reckon. I don't use tablets or laptops. I'm either on my glorious desktop with two monitors or I'm on my phone - I have no interest in tablets and, given all the time I spent in England, I am overcome with the cheapest sort of pride when I see Canada Geese (NOT Canadian Geese) - in fact I've defended Canada Geese against wild Swans where we lived in England. I've actually charged into the water in defence of Canada Geese because Swans are horrible cunts towards other Swans, let alone other birds - a most obnoxious breed. There was one time I called the wildlife authority because a pair of Swans was abusing a lost cygnet, having pushed the parents out of the little lake. It was awful. That being said, Canada Geese would behave the same way if they were the biggest birds on the lake. I've shot, killed and ate many Canada Geese and I would do so again just as soon as I can get a firearms permit but, BUT, when I see one flying alone I have pity for them because I know they mate for life and I am the same.


Get a room.
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#195 User is offline   Malaclypse 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 07:29 AM

View PostVengeance, on 07 September 2016 - 02:54 AM, said:

View PostMentalist, on 07 September 2016 - 02:43 AM, said:

View PostVengeance, on 07 September 2016 - 02:37 AM, said:

View PostSecret Startaker, on 07 September 2016 - 01:51 AM, said:

View PostVengeance, on 07 September 2016 - 12:42 AM, said:

View PostSecret Startaker, on 06 September 2016 - 10:00 PM, said:

View PostVengeance, on 06 September 2016 - 09:48 PM, said:

. Nothing that I stated is a misstatement.


Except that you misspelled Vader, and Luke didn't really kill him. Luke cuts off a mechanical hand. Vader is fatally injured saving luke from the emperor's force lightning, betraying the emperor and committing regicide. Thus even if you were a pro empire observer, Vader is ultmately a traitor.

I got your point. It was just wrong.


That is all Rebel propaganda the only witness to Lord Vaders demise and to the tragic death of the Emperor was the craven assassin Luke Skywalker. Thus he created the narrative that has been spoon feed you over the years of war since Lord Vaders death. Don't tell me you actually believe that a band of unsophisticated teddy bear creatures were able to bring down the defense ray of a second floating galactic home. . That should tell you that the whole thing was simply a cover story for the unspeakable destruction that the rebels instigated.


That is also the only witness that skywalker existed, much less was there. If you are going to assume the ignorant observer angle, then Skywalker as asssassin makes no sense.


Guards escorted him into the chambers of the emperor and lord Vader. He alone walked out. Lord Vader initiated a system wide manhunt for the rebel leader which was lead by no other then bubba fet. Skywalker was and is alive plotting his continued treachery.

The republic was beyond saving at the point that lord Vader took over. We were imbroiled in the clone wars thanks to the Jedi only by a strong hand assuming control could the war be stopped. I believe that eventually once the rebellion was put down the emperor would have allowed for an emperioral senate to be formed then slowly allowed for them to assume duties. The republican senate was a breeding ground for the rebels and its indecicivness allowed the Jedi to assume control of the armed forces.


uh-huh. Because humans just love giving up absolute power when they don't need to.

Note that I have no strong opinions on Vader himself, but the system he erroneously believed in deserves nothing but contempt.


That is where you are wrong the emperor wasn't human. He was a enlightened Nabbion. Human is an earth concept. Plus on earth I believe that Augusto Pinochet was a dictator who relinquished power in a free election once he had brought the country into the 20th century. Thus it does happen so your argue ment is false.


I worked in Chile in the late 90's when Pinochet was still in power. It was a silly place. We were there to study geoglyphs (earth-pictures as a pure translation). This was, is and continues to be an ideal environment for archaeological endeavours due to how incredibly dry it is there. Preservation is all about extreme dry or extreme wet, nothing in between. We found modern geoglyphs made by people who went out into the desert to hide from Pinochet's death squads. You mobilizing Pinochet as ...what? a model for modern rationality? is absurd and offensive.

#196 User is offline   Malaclypse 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 07:45 AM

View PostWhisperzzzzzzz, on 08 September 2016 - 01:42 PM, said:

Speaking of Mal, I guess whatever he took freed him from the aimless tyranny of message board trolling?

EDIT: @Veng, the Yuuzhan Vong would be too awesome for mainstream audiences.


Oh yeah, you fancy your chances pipsqueak? I'm here and and apparently I haven't freed myself from the aimless tyranny of message-board trolling so how would you like to proceed, having openly antagonized me? What I like most is the shameless capitalizing on the fact that I'm in here sharing with you all my struggles and so on and you choose to pounce and take the piss out of the fact that I take mood-altering drugs when I can be sensible enough to do so. Thing is, I do it mostly for the sake of others. The main point of being provocative is to reveal the tendencies of others so you can deal with them appropriately :killingme: Be warned.

#197 User is offline   Malaclypse 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 07:50 AM

View Postamphibian, on 09 September 2016 - 03:24 AM, said:

I don't know why Mal wants people to "hate" him or "fight" with him in order to sustain interest here.

I mean, I tuned out all of the Star Trek stuff and my experience was still a fun one.

If he literally wants to fight, I'll take him up on that offer though. Me fite gut.


You are such an insufferable clunge. Why?! Why are you this way? You're not stupid. "If he literally wants to fight...Me fite gut" - really? You grapple good, I get that and that's cool. I would devour you in conversation and if it came to it, I would feed you to my dogs.

#198 User is offline   Malaclypse 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 08:07 AM

View PostHoosierDaddy, on 10 September 2016 - 02:04 AM, said:

View PostObdigore, on 10 September 2016 - 01:56 AM, said:

Have you ever had sweet potato fries covered with maple syrup and honest to god cake frosting?

You could probably put it next to a sandwich.


That sounds like diabetes on a dish.

Also Canadian. They should just change the currency to the Maple Syrup Quotient.


Ignorance like this is hard to come by and lo and behold, it's an American spouting it - Surpise surprise. Get fatter on your own time but don't presume to blame your bad eating habits on us :killingme:

#199 User is offline   Malaclypse 

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 08:12 AM

View PostAzath Vitr (D, on 10 September 2016 - 07:24 AM, said:

View PostRaymond Luxury Yacht, on 10 September 2016 - 07:11 AM, said:

Baked sweet potatoes have a higher glycemic index than a regular white potato. You have to boil them to reap the Low sugar benefits.


Holy shitblack spunk, you seem to be right! "These dramatic differences come from the way the starches in sweet potatoes gelatinize during cooking. Foods that turn viscous, or jelly-like, in your digestive tract have a lower GI because the gelatinous substance slows the release of the nutrients in the food. Baking your sweet potatoes instead of boiling them changes the quality of their starches and transforms this root vegetable from a moderate-GI food to a high GI-food."

So in place of the absurdity of "fries" that are baked rather than fried... I shall request my "sweet" "potato" "fries" be boiled.

Though in all seriousness---the counterexamples provided by European and East Asian cultures (the "French paradox"---that they eat sandwiches, and bread; the East Asian paradox---that they eat white rice) demonstrate that "LGI is the One True Way to not being morbidly obese for non-genetic reasons!" is false (even though I've been doing LGI pretty faithfully for about the last 7 years now, and "lost" and "kept off" about 60 pounds over the period---male six-packs aren't that rare, but a six-pack *underneath* still-visible stretch-mark-scars... probably is).


Interesting...those that have truly suffered are always more interesting than those who have not. Colour me intrigued.

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Posted 11 September 2016 - 08:15 AM

View PostEmperorMagus, on 11 September 2016 - 05:45 AM, said:

View PostMalaclypse, on 11 September 2016 - 05:36 AM, said:

OK I'm here and Imma try to catch up with the relentless spam in this thread and not get too angry about the pointlessness of the majority of your offerings.


Mal, do you think I'm suited to pursuing a legal career?


I've had a quick look at your recent posts and based on that I'd have to say no. You seem a bit of a silly fruitloop to be honest. But, that being said, people achieve hings they don't deserve all the time in this broken world. Good luck to you :killingme:

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