Malazan Empire: Funniest Quotes - Malazan Empire

I'll jump in early on this one, im only part way through it and have already found what i think to be one of the funiest quotes of the series

"Tehol walked to the ladder 'I trust you had your own knives close to hand'
'I don't have any knives'
Tehol paused, one hand on the nearest rung 'What? Well, where are all our weapons?'
'We Don't have any weapons, master'
'None? Did we ever'
'No, Some wooden spoons...'
'And are adept with them?'
'Very.'
'Well that's all right then. You Coming?'"

It had me in stitches, i just love the conversations between tehol and bugg.

“Tell me, Tool, what dominates your thoughts?”
The Imass shrugged before replying. “I think of futility, Adjunct.”
“Do all Imass think of futility?”
“No few think at all.”
“Why is that?”
The Imass leaned his head to one side and regarded her. “Because, Adjunct, it is futile.”