Malazan Empire: The Watching Trickster Pub - Malazan Empire

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The Watching Trickster Pub Come in, sit down and share your random thoughts with a good pint.

#1961 User is offline   Thelomen Toblerone 

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Posted 04 August 2010 - 06:52 AM

View Postteholbeddict, on 04 August 2010 - 05:00 AM, said:

Oh cool, so exciting!!! I get to have a malaz neighbour!


Yes, but lest we forget, you are Canadian malazites. Thus, no matter how hard you try or plan, you two shall never meet. You could live next door, but then one would develop agoraphobia and the other claustrophobia or somesuch, just because of the malaz canadian curse.

It's similar to the fabled malaz Danish curse, except for that one it's just that Apt does not in fact exist in reality. Him and Trem have been living near eachother for 2 years now and still not met. I'm going to Copenhagen next week, and have a sneaking suspicion the event will be Apt-less. He's not real, I tell you!

An interesting day at work lies ahead for me, after/during/before which I expect I shall need plenty to drink. I may well have got a promotion (well, sideways shift of sorts) with attached 25% pay rise, but it all depends on whether my current boss is willing to let me. And I strongly suspect they won't be too happy about losing a member of staff who they won't be allowed to replace for a year. A day of awkward meetings lies ahead....
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#1962 User is offline   MTS 

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Posted 04 August 2010 - 10:19 AM

I wish I could move to Canadia. It's warm there right now...*shivers*
Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem.

Si hoc adfixum in obice legere potes, et liberaliter educatus et nimis propinquus ades.
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#1963 User is offline   teholbeddict 

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Posted 04 August 2010 - 02:02 PM

@TT What Canadaland curse is this?? I haven't heard of it! I mean sure we don't have get togethers like you guys do, but that's also because we live in a mammoth country and even one province apart can be a ridiculous amount to travel in order to meet up. It's not easy for us to all come together. If someone's living in my city though I'm sure I could manage to grab a coffee with them or show them the city. I've certainly got no qulams about meeting people. I refuse to believe in this curse! As for Apt Apterson, just look for the perv in a wheel chair, he shouldn't be too hard to spot. Either that or look for the man walking hand in hand with a horse.....I mean Sarah Jessica Parker!:p

@MTS You're welcome to come for a visit Girlfiend! I think we're supposed to be in the high thirties today. Unfortunately it's also humid as hell atm, not the best combo.

This post has been edited by teholbeddict: 04 August 2010 - 02:03 PM

Procrastination is like masturbation, you're only F ing yourself...
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#1964 User is offline   alt146 

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Posted 04 August 2010 - 04:00 PM

View PostMTS, on 04 August 2010 - 10:19 AM, said:

I wish I could move to Canadia. It's warm there right now...*shivers*


It started warming up here two weeks ago almost. In fact the jasmine in my garden is starting to bloom :p
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#1965 User is offline   D'rek 

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Posted 04 August 2010 - 04:11 PM

View PostMentalist, on 03 August 2010 - 03:23 AM, said:

we've got

Jan-ski day (yeah, they had no idea what they were thinking with that one)
Feb- Valentine's day/Family day (as of this year)
March-?
April-good Friday/easter Monday
May-Victoria day
Jun-?
July-Canada Day
Aug-Civic Holiday (better known as Carribana weekend)
Sept-Labour Day
Oct-Thanksgiving (always coinciding with my b-day)
Nov-Rememberance Day
Dec-Xmass


Wtf is "ski day"?? The official day off across the country in January, wouldn't that be, you know, New Year's?
March doesn't have one nation-wide because April has 2 and February is short.
June has St-Jean Baptiste Day, and we wouldn't want to upset the delicate Quebecois by having a holiday in the same month as their national one!


View PostThelomen Toblerone, on 04 August 2010 - 06:52 AM, said:

View Postteholbeddict, on 04 August 2010 - 05:00 AM, said:

Oh cool, so exciting!!! I get to have a malaz neighbour!


Yes, but lest we forget, you are Canadian malazites. Thus, no matter how hard you try or plan, you two shall never meet. You could live next door, but then one would develop agoraphobia and the other claustrophobia or somesuch, just because of the malaz canadian curse.

It's similar to the fabled malaz Danish curse, except for that one it's just that Apt does not in fact exist in reality. Him and Trem have been living near eachother for 2 years now and still not met. I'm going to Copenhagen next week, and have a sneaking suspicion the event will be Apt-less. He's not real, I tell you!

An interesting day at work lies ahead for me, after/during/before which I expect I shall need plenty to drink. I may well have got a promotion (well, sideways shift of sorts) with attached 25% pay rise, but it all depends on whether my current boss is willing to let me. And I strongly suspect they won't be too happy about losing a member of staff who they won't be allowed to replace for a year. A day of awkward meetings lies ahead....


Don't want to jinx it or anything, but I am totally breaking that curse... tomorrow.

View Postworrywort, on 14 September 2012 - 08:07 PM, said:

I kinda love it when D'rek unleashes her nerd wrath, as I knew she would here. Sorry innocent bystanders, but someone's gotta be the kindling.
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#1966 User is offline   Slow Ben 

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Posted 04 August 2010 - 04:17 PM

The heat index here is almost to 120. It sucks.


On a good note, I had two crullers for breakfast this morning.
I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.
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#1967 User is offline   Darkwatch 

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Posted 05 August 2010 - 12:19 AM

View PostD, on 04 August 2010 - 04:11 PM, said:

View PostMentalist, on 03 August 2010 - 03:23 AM, said:

we've got

Jan-ski day (yeah, they had no idea what they were thinking with that one)
Feb- Valentine's day/Family day (as of this year)
March-?
April-good Friday/easter Monday
May-Victoria day
Jun-?
July-Canada Day
Aug-Civic Holiday (better known as Carribana weekend)
Sept-Labour Day
Oct-Thanksgiving (always coinciding with my b-day)
Nov-Rememberance Day
Dec-Xmass


Wtf is "ski day"?? The official day off across the country in January, wouldn't that be, you know, New Year's?
March doesn't have one nation-wide because April has 2 and February is short.
June has St-Jean Baptiste Day, and we wouldn't want to upset the delicate Quebecois by having a holiday in the same month as their national one!


Well the Civic Holiday applies to all the provinces except Québec. It balances out la St-Jean in June, that way all Canadians have an equal amount of days off.
La St-Jean is just an excuse for getting drunk and do Québecers ever take advantage of it.

Good to hear that TB and Ment will be living in the same city.

And yes there is a Canadian Malazite meet-up curse.
I went off about it in another thread.
You can never have more than 2 malazites at a single meet-up.
All other more grand scale meet-ups will be broken up by any number of reasons.

Hopefully it can be conquered over time.
The Pub is Always Open

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Cursed Summer returns. The Lady Now Sleeps.

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#1968 User is offline   Flashwit 

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Posted 05 August 2010 - 02:44 AM

you guys have weird holidays... lol
"The world, someone once said, gives back what is given. In abundance. But then, as I would point out, someone was always saying something. Until i get fed up and have them executed." Kallor

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#1969 User is offline   RodeoRanch 

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Posted 05 August 2010 - 04:07 AM

View PostMTS, on 04 August 2010 - 10:19 AM, said:

I wish I could move to Canadia. It's warm there right now...*shivers*


It's a trick. It's snow any day now.
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#1970 User is offline   Darkwatch 

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Posted 05 August 2010 - 04:26 AM

I'm watching tv, one of the rare times I do since I'm not at home.
And there are commercials.
They are seriously odd.

The one I'm currently confused about, and by contagion all their commercials, that of charmin. Those commercials containing neurotic clean freak bears.

The thing is I've never really paid attention to them and how completely disturbed they are.

This particular commercial opens with a mother bear and a child bear inexplicably using a telescope to observe the moon.
Then another child bear on a branch in the telescope's way shoves over and his ass entres the into view with those little white paper squares they have in all commercials.
Now the mother bear simply says something along the lines of "you can't pass inspection with little pieces left behind". In no way concerned that she is looking at a magnified picture of her child's rectum. And it seems normal to be inspecting her child's anus for these things.
Now any normal parent would wonder why on Earth their child is on a branch in front of a telescope.

But more disturbing than that is I really thought about all the commercials emphasizing the point that Charmin leaves less paper residue on your ass than other brands.
This is a rather particular focus, one that when you think about it makes no bloody sense.
Unless you're going at your ass like an enraged floor scrubber then I very much doubt there would be any residue. This leads to a few thoughts as to why they push this.
As I said I doubt any sane person would leave paper residue, but I don't really know considering I've never checked.
This implies that charmin has done checks to find this out, which is obscenely disturbing.
Otherwise it implies they haven't checked but are intense arse scrapper and see that their tp has torn. That is also strange.

Another thing is this obsession that you need to make sure there is no paper residue left. The question is why? Do the people at charmin regularly find themselves without pants? And even more frightening, do they find themselves in situations where they're pantless and spreading their ass cheeks to make sure everything is visible?

I mean what is this anal obsession at Charmin? Are they really into the back door thing? Like to the point of obsessing over their anal cleanliness because the possibility of spontaneous anal sex is a very real and constant probability?
Or are they suffering from some sort of Stockholm syndrome where surprise butsecks has lost it's horrifying quality and become merely a nuissance?
(The nuance between spontaneous anal sex and surprise butsecks is one is spontaneous but both parties are mutually aware and the other is a surprise for one party).

Anyway you look at it the people at Charmin are incredibly disturbed.
The Pub is Always Open

Proud supporter of the Wolves of Winter. Glory be to her Majesty, The Lady Snow.
Cursed Summer returns. The Lady Now Sleeps.

The Sexy Thatch Burning Physicist

Τον Πρωτος Αληθη Δεσποτην της Οικιας Αυτος

RodeoRanch said:

You're a rock.
A non-touching itself rock.
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#1971 User is offline   Aptorian 

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Posted 05 August 2010 - 07:11 AM

Maybe the commercial are for people who use bidets? Wet toilet paper can get kind of ... fragmentet.
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#1972 User is offline   teholbeddict 

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Posted 05 August 2010 - 01:56 PM

You need to stay away from television DW my dear.


No, really though I noticed the same thing about that Charmin commercial the first time I saw it. I remember thinking WTF. I suspect they use the little animated bears to somehow soften the uncomfortably odd nature of the subject matter.
Procrastination is like masturbation, you're only F ing yourself...
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Human progress is neither automatic nor inevitable… Every step toward the goal of justice requires sacrifice, suffering, and struggle; the tireless exertions and passionate concern of dedicated individuals.
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The only thing one can learn from one's past mistakes is how to repeat them exactly.
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Muffins are just ugly cupcakes!
-Zanth13-
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#1973 User is offline   Grimjust Bearegular 

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Posted 05 August 2010 - 06:22 PM

I have bacon in the fridge.


Also, is "ooh ahh, I love you Mona. I know you're way too young for me, but I don't mind." appropriate lyrics to a song sung by 24 year old man?
Things and stuffs...and other important objects.
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#1974 User is offline   Mentalist 

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Posted 06 August 2010 - 03:31 AM

aaah, I finally managed to grab a shift for tomorrow at the park. it's been eluding me all week. I'd come home, read Iwork notifications, rush onto it, just to find out that the shift has been taken. oh, how upset I was.


and yet, today, I checked my phone on the way form work, and there was another one. I ran form the bus, rushed into the house, and it was still there!

as such, I now get to work for 3 days in a row, and all is right in the world again.
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View PostJump Around, on 23 October 2011 - 11:04 AM, said:

And I want to state that Ment has out-weaseled me by far in this game.
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#1975 User is offline   MTS 

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Posted 06 August 2010 - 03:50 AM

Ah, gotta love public transport. By simply sitting there listening to my iPod I learned more about a 15 yr-old girl's sexual appetite than I ever wanted to, and had to listen to Miley Cyrus sung horrendously off-key. My ears, they bleed!

'Grats on getting the shift you wanted Ment, I know how frsutrating that can be.
Antiquis temporibus, nati tibi similes in rupibus ventosissimis exponebantur ad necem.

Si hoc adfixum in obice legere potes, et liberaliter educatus et nimis propinquus ades.
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#1976 User is offline   Mentalist 

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Posted 06 August 2010 - 03:53 AM

pah, when will people learn that public transportation is designed for sleeping to compensate for the sleep one loses because I have to get up so damn early to take the transit int he first place?
The problem with the gene pool is that there's no lifeguard
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View PostJump Around, on 23 October 2011 - 11:04 AM, said:

And I want to state that Ment has out-weaseled me by far in this game.
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#1977 User is offline   Thelomen Toblerone 

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Posted 07 August 2010 - 01:47 AM

2 nights in a row, stupidly drunk. Apparently spending most of the day vomiting is insufficient for me to learn from.
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#1978 User is offline   KalamMekhar 

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Posted 07 August 2010 - 02:27 AM

TT - has anyone ever told you that you drink to much? incase they havent, you drink to much!
Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

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#1979 User is offline   Flashwit 

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Posted 07 August 2010 - 04:14 AM

wow you know what we forgot to do? the second skittle bomb night! wasnt it suppose to be the third of this month?
"The world, someone once said, gives back what is given. In abundance. But then, as I would point out, someone was always saying something. Until i get fed up and have them executed." Kallor

"no im not a crazed gunman dad im an assassin, well the difference bein one is a job and one is a mental sickness!"
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#1980 User is offline   KalamMekhar 

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Posted 07 August 2010 - 04:41 AM

I think Tb has just beenr eally busy, im sure if she could have and had the time, she would have had the second night.
Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

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