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Top Ten Bar/Party Fouls no do's , just the donts

#1 User is offline   Gladius 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM

10. your 34 year old drunk buddy who cant resist the coin operated airplane outside the drug store next to the bar.
.9 that chick who begs a drink off of you, and the returns to you periodically throughout the evening to show you that her glass is again empty.
.8 anyone who wants to trade you their nasty sweated up, wadded, torn in half dollar bill for a perfect one from your wallet so they can listen to 2 songs on the juke.
.7 The idiot who always manages to spill every drink on the table because he forgets to pull out his chair when he stands up.
.6 Blue Maui
.5 the sore beer pong loser
.4 the preacher, or anyone who thinks that booze makes them sound more intelligent.
.3 flaming drinks ( just picture the possibilities )
.2 the 2 hammered mosh pit guys who scare all the women off the dance floor.
.1 the drunk guy who likes to get real close to you to talk because he doesnt think you have enough spit in your eye.
Can you dig it ?
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#2 User is offline   Tapper 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 12:08 PM

.9 isn't a bad sign, per sé, it just depends on how you exploit deal with the situation
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#3 User is offline   Battalion 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 12:34 PM

What about the pissed bloke who comes up to you seven or eight times a night and tells you some terribly boring story over and over again, when it was bad enough first time round? You have to fake smile so much your cheeks hurt, pretend you've never heard the tale before, ignore the fact that it gets more and more exagerated as the night goes on, and the perpetrator's breath gets worse and worse and he stands closer and closer, talks louder and louder, laughs at his own jokes over and over, and generally gets more and more annoying.
Get to the chopper!
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#4 User is offline   dktorode 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 01:44 PM

Jager bombs

/thread
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#5 User is offline   Macros 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 03:58 PM

I see your jager bombs and raise you a jagerpagne. I either vomit or get about 30 seconds of the tremors
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#6 User is offline   Jusentantaka 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 04:04 PM

 dktorode, on 04 February 2010 - 01:44 PM, said:

Jager bombs

/thread


Nice haircut chief.


Being the loud woman in the bar who's drunk. Too lazy to copy it from the trickster thread, so go look and laugh and click the green button.
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#7 User is offline   Darkwatch 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 04:07 PM

The drunk girl at a party:

Quote

"I just smoked the wrong side of a cigarette! Who wants to go swimming? Ah! This song is about me!"

The Pub is Always Open

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#8 User is offline   wolf_2099 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 08:31 PM

Push-Up contest.
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#9 User is offline   Aptorian 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 09:29 PM

 Gladius, on 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM, said:

10. your 34 year old drunk buddy who cant resist the coin operated airplane outside the drug store next to the bar.


One time me and a friend, in a drunken epiphany, decided to sneak in to a closed down amusement park next to the concert we were attending. We saw this little Postman Pete ride and managed to squeeze the both of us into a cabin made for a 5 year old. We were rockin back and forth, wailing the lyrics to the puppet show, and generally being very noisy. Some manager came out and threatened to beat the ever loving crap out of us. We tried to run away, but we were stuck in the ride, after much shouting and cursing we made our escape, but my friend lost a shoe.

 Gladius, on 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM, said:

.9 that chick who begs a drink off of you, and the returns to you periodically throughout the evening to show you that her glass is again empty.


Is it a foul to keep getting her drinks or is it a foul to be mooching on other people for booze? See, where I come from, this is a game. The girl will try to get you to buy all her booze, and you will try to get her drunk enough that she puts out. It becomes a game to see what fails first, her sense of dignity or your credit card.

 Gladius, on 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM, said:

.8 anyone who wants to trade you their nasty sweated up, wadded, torn in half dollar bill for a perfect one from your wallet so they can listen to 2 songs on the juke.


That's not a foul. Putting 10 dollars in the machine and ordering nothing but hanson and N'sync for the next half hour, now that's a fould.

 Gladius, on 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM, said:

.7 The idiot who always manages to spill every drink on the table because he forgets to pull out his chair when he stands up.


As long as the alcohol has not spilled on to the floor it's still good. Hold a pint glass to the side of the table and try to scoop as much beer and shots into the glass as possible.

Watch out for cigarette butts and peanuts.

 Gladius, on 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM, said:

.6 Blue Maui


I don't know what this is but I'm willing to try anything once.

 Gladius, on 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM, said:

.5 the sore beer pong loser


Fuck you! Beer pong is serious business. Instead of playing for rounds, we just play to see who gets the most hammered. We play an equivelant of beer pong at the Uni cafe where you place a barstool with a pint glass a meter or so from the bar disk and try to bounce a ping pong ball off the bar and into the glass. You get three shots per round, for each ball you get into the glass, the other players have to down 1/3 of their beer. Three strikes means you have to down an entire beer. It's fun at first, but man, when people get into a stream, it's tough.


 Gladius, on 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM, said:

.4 the preacher, or anyone who thinks that booze makes them sound more intelligent.


The mind produces amazing ideas when fuelled by alcohol, what kind of asshole wouldn't share this brilliance with his fellow man.

 Gladius, on 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM, said:

.3 flaming drinks ( just picture the possibilities )


SAMBUCA!! WHOOOO!!! One of my friends had burns on his upper lip for a week after sloshing Sambuca all over his face. It was awesome.

 Gladius, on 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM, said:

.2 the 2 hammered mosh pit guys who scare all the women off the dance floor.


How can you not slam dance to Black Eyed Peas? It the choice of any gentleman.

 Gladius, on 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM, said:

.1 the drunk guy who likes to get real close to you to talk because he doesnt think you have enough spit in your eye.


If you're sober enough to even notice the spittle it's time to get another round.
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#10 User is offline   LadyMTL 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 10:03 PM

I don't know if this makes it to the top 10 but this happens with one of my friends...way too much. I call it the "Wasted Wanderer". Basically what happens is, after she's had a few too many, she freaking disappears! I mean, turn your back for one second and she's nowhere to be found, like totally vanished.
So then the rest of us have to go and track her down because knowing her she'd leave with some homicidal douchebag and then I'd end up reading about her in the next day's papers.

One time she actually left the bar and was half a block down, in an alley! An alley! I swear, we ought to put a GPS in the woman, it'd save us a lot of time and stress. :(
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#11 User is online   amphibian 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 10:18 PM

 Maia Irraz, on 04 February 2010 - 10:03 PM, said:

I don't know if this makes it to the top 10 but this happens with one of my friends...way too much. I call it the "Wasted Wanderer". Basically what happens is, after she's had a few too many, she freaking disappears! I mean, turn your back for one second and she's nowhere to be found, like totally vanished.
So then the rest of us have to go and track her down because knowing her she'd leave with some homicidal douchebag and then I'd end up reading about her in the next day's papers.

One time she actually left the bar and was half a block down, in an alley! An alley! I swear, we ought to put a GPS in the woman, it'd save us a lot of time and stress. :(

Try being found in a driveway a mile and a half away from the bar in a sketchy neighborhood. I was lucky the passerby who answered the ringing cell phone in my pocket only took $40.

As Aptorian said, a good chunk of those aren't actually party fouls. Those are things like "Being the annoying guy who randomly tackles people to the floor", "Attempting (and failing) to cook something at a stranger's house" and "Taking off your shirt in the middle of the party".

All stuff I've been guilty of in the past...
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#12 User is offline   Obdigore 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 10:22 PM

 amphibian, on 04 February 2010 - 10:18 PM, said:

 Maia Irraz, on 04 February 2010 - 10:03 PM, said:

I don't know if this makes it to the top 10 but this happens with one of my friends...way too much. I call it the "Wasted Wanderer". Basically what happens is, after she's had a few too many, she freaking disappears! I mean, turn your back for one second and she's nowhere to be found, like totally vanished.
So then the rest of us have to go and track her down because knowing her she'd leave with some homicidal douchebag and then I'd end up reading about her in the next day's papers.

One time she actually left the bar and was half a block down, in an alley! An alley! I swear, we ought to put a GPS in the woman, it'd save us a lot of time and stress. :(

Try being found in a driveway a mile and a half away from the bar in a sketchy neighborhood. I was lucky the passerby who answered the ringing cell phone in my pocket only took $40.

As Aptorian said, a good chunk of those aren't actually party fouls. Those are things like "Being the annoying guy who randomly tackles people to the floor", "Attempting (and failing) to cook something at a stranger's house" and "Taking off your shirt in the middle of the party".

All stuff I've been guilty of in the past...


That second one isn't a foul depending on the sex and the type of party...

but you are right about most of them being 'drunk fouls, not party fouls.'
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#13 User is offline   HoosierDaddy 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 10:25 PM

Oh the stories that I could tell. But I won't. Those things are mostly annoying.
Trouble arrives when the opponents to such a system institute its extreme opposite, where individualism becomes godlike and sacrosanct, and no greater service to any other ideal (including community) is possible. In such a system rapacious greed thrives behind the guise of freedom, and the worst aspects of human nature come to the fore....
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#14 User is offline   Jusentantaka 

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Posted 04 February 2010 - 10:32 PM

 H.D., on 04 February 2010 - 10:25 PM, said:

Oh the stories that I could tell. But I won't. Those things are mostly annoying.


Tell you what, I'll tell a story, you tell a story and we'll show these dirty not-Indianian's that we know how to do the dumbest shit in the world. Come onnnnn...
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#15 User is offline   Gladius 

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 12:25 AM

 amphibian, on 04 February 2010 - 10:18 PM, said:

 Maia Irraz, on 04 February 2010 - 10:03 PM, said:

I don't know if this makes it to the top 10 but this happens with one of my friends...way too much. I call it the "Wasted Wanderer". Basically what happens is, after she's had a few too many, she freaking disappears! I mean, turn your back for one second and she's nowhere to be found, like totally vanished.
So then the rest of us have to go and track her down because knowing her she'd leave with some homicidal douchebag and then I'd end up reading about her in the next day's papers.

One time she actually left the bar and was half a block down, in an alley! An alley! I swear, we ought to put a GPS in the woman, it'd save us a lot of time and stress. Posted Image

Try being found in a driveway a mile and a half away from the bar in a sketchy neighborhood. I was lucky the passerby who answered the ringing cell phone in my pocket only took $40.

As Aptorian said, a good chunk of those aren't actually party fouls. Those are things like "Being the annoying guy who randomly tackles people to the floor", "Attempting (and failing) to cook something at a stranger's house" and "Taking off your shirt in the middle of the party".

All stuff I've been guilty of in the past...



These are just my top ten, feel free to be offended by anything you like.
Can you dig it ?
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#16 User is offline   Adjutant Stormy~ 

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 02:16 AM

 Gladius, on 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM, said:

10. your 34 year old drunk buddy who cant resist the coin operated airplane outside the drug store next to the bar.
.7 The idiot who always manages to spill every drink on the table because he forgets to pull out his chair when he stands up.
.5 the sore beer pong loser
.4 the preacher, or anyone who thinks that booze makes them sound more intelligent.
.3 flaming drinks ( just picture the possibilities )


10, yes.
7, ALWAYS me.
5, I don't play to drink, I PLAY TO WIN
4, Story of my life.
3, NO- RE: FACIAL HAIR
<!--quoteo(post=462161:date=Nov 1 2008, 06:13 PM:name=Aptorian)--><div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Aptorian @ Nov 1 2008, 06:13 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=462161"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'><!--quotec-->God damn. Mighty drunk. Must ... what is the english movement movement movement for drunk... with out you seemimg drunk?

bla bla bla

Peopleare harrasing me... grrrrrh.

Also people with big noses aren't jews, they're just french

EDIT: We has editted so mucj that5 we're not quite sure... also, leave britney alone.<!--QuoteEnd--></div><!--QuoteEEnd-->
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#17 User is offline   cerveza_fiesta 

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 01:55 PM

Ultimate party foul experienced a few years back by a friend of a friend at a house party.

Skinny dipping

when you're a dude

and nobody else is naked.

and you decide to get out of the pool

and tell off the homeowners when they try to get you to put clothes back on

Continue refusing a junk-covering until passing out drunk in a disgusting vomit covered nude heap in the living room.


epic party.
........oOOOOOo
......//| | |oO
.....|| | | | O....
BEERS!

......
\\| | | |

........'-----'

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#18 User is offline   Ozymandiac 

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 02:00 PM

Picking up a bottle of hard liquor, and...

Wake up with no recollection what so ever of what happened after that.
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#19 User is offline   Captain Beardface 

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 03:51 PM

 Aptorian, on 04 February 2010 - 09:29 PM, said:


 Gladius, on 04 February 2010 - 10:44 AM, said:

.5 the sore beer pong loser


Fuck you! Beer pong is serious business. Instead of playing for rounds, we just play to see who gets the most hammered. We play an equivelant of beer pong at the Uni cafe where you place a barstool with a pint glass a meter or so from the bar disk and try to bounce a ping pong ball off the bar and into the glass. You get three shots per round, for each ball you get into the glass, the other players have to down 1/3 of their beer. Three strikes means you have to down an entire beer. It's fun at first, but man, when people get into a stream, it's tough.



If you're playing pong to get hammered try this wickedly dangerous edition of pong, always a big hit on St. Patrick's Day.

Fill the cups on the table with a half pint of Guinness and when a cup gets hit first fish out the ball then drop a shot of Irish Whiskey and Irish Cream then chug...

also know as Irish Car Bomb Beer Pong...
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#20 User is offline   Slow Ben 

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Posted 05 February 2010 - 05:30 PM

You know that thing your drunken friends do when they tap the bottom of their beer bottle on the top of yours causing it to volcano?


I had this one dumbass friend who just found out about it and went around doing it all night. Which isnt too terrible, except that he's hammered and instead of just tapping the bottle he FUCKING SMASHES THE NECK! So i'm left with a half a bottle of beer filled with broken bits of glass.

I was drunk enough the first 2 were funny, the 3rd i punched him in the stomach and he stopped.
I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.
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