Malazan Empire: teholbeddict - Malazan Empire

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teholbeddict This week, Tehol "Small Foot" Beddict!

#1 User is offline   Shinrei 

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Posted 03 August 2009 - 11:26 PM

1) How were you introduced to the Malazan series?

Umm I guess the answer to this one, would be that I introduced myself. I love reading epic fantasy, particularly if I can get it in a series. I don't read reviews, or consult lists, I just walk into the bookstore and look for the thickest book I can get my hands on. I know it's not very scientific, and most people would say it's not the best way to go about picking out books, but it's what I do. Anyways I walked into the fantasy section and there they were...the Malazan books! They were definitely thick, and it was a series, I turned over GotM, read the back and proceeded to grab everything they had! I was completely hooked and went on a Malazan reading marathon.

2) What brought you to Malazan Empire forums?

Well I really was hooked on the books, and I speed read through them. I got to the end of Reaper's Gale (TotH had yet to be released) and was at a complete loss, I didn't know what to do with myself! I wanted more! So I did a google search on Malazan and the link to the forum popped up. I was thrilled to find the series had it's own board, full of people who were equally or more obsessed that I was! Then I promptly lost my nerve, and lurked for about six months lol!
3) How did you choose your username?

I wish I had some elaborate answer for this, but it's really quite simple. Tehol Beddict is my favourite character of the series, hands down. I've always thought, if I could be the female version of Tehol, I'd be set! Well minus his some of his culinary choices! Boiled leather is really not to my liking. As there is very little chance of my ever becoming Tehol in real life, I thought well this is the closest I'm going to get! So I took the opportunity to honour his greatness by taking his name on for my own. I also liked that I wasn't going to be easily identifiable as a female right off the bat. As I mentioned in the previous question, I had lurked for about six months before ever posting. There seemed to be a serious obsession with boobs going on in some sections of the board!


4) Do you remember your first post? What was it and who responded?

Umm I remember my first post, and it wasn't very exciting, I was trying not to rock the boat. The second post however left me absolutely mortified and it's all because of Brood! I had lurked for months, and finally got the courage to post. I made a comment in a thread about Pratchett, saying that I had never read his work, and that he seemed to be one of these love him or hate him authors. Well the dreaded Brood jumped all over that saying that he'd never heard of anyone refer to Pratchett in that way... etc. So I meekly said okay I will read his stuff, give me a suggestion. Well suggestions abounded, opinions were thrown around and I went to buy some of his books. However I didn't buy the one a lot of people thought I should have started with. So I said I would head back to the books store straight away to get it. Upon which Brood made some snide comment about the fact that I'd better hurry, before all twenty copies were gone at the used book store! I was so embarrassed! I know the Discworld books may be really easy to come by in the UK, but they are hard to find here in Canada. There were only about three of four of his books available, and only one copy of each. I really did think I should go grab it before someone else did. It's funny because after lurking all that time, Brood was the one person who's attention I wanted to avoid, and straight off the bat he blasted me! It seemed, at the time, that I could do no right in his eyes! It was a massive blow to my noobie courage, but I got over it!

5) Which members do you feel a special connection with?

It would definitely be my Trickster Crew! I love those guys! Whether it's real life of the internet, good friends are hard to come by. You can go into the Trickster at any time to bitch, rant, talk about your life, or something exciting and it never falls on deaf ears. There's always good advice or opinions to be found in there. We like to kick back, listen to good music and have some RL and e-drinks. I can always count on PM's in my inbox making sure I'm okay if I haven't posted in 48 hours. Not to mention they have been absolutely fantastic in supporting me and cheering me up, through this ordeal with my leg. So big shout outs to all my Trickster peeps!

6) What are your favorite parts of the forum?

I would probably say the Phoenix Inn, Sports, and Other Literature.

7) How's your leg? And your house? And Canada's health care system?

The leg is finally coming along. I've recently had surgery on it, during which I gained some new hardware. One metal plate, five screws, and five pins to be exact. So I think it qualifies as bionic now! At least I'm out of a cast and into a brace though, so I can't really complain.

Regarding Canada's health care system, I can't really complain about that either. Yes wait times can be frustrating, but being a doctor myself I can understand them. Through everything that has happened with my leg, I've received excellent care and never been charged a cent, not even for crutches or leg braces. I've been able to go the doctor of my choosing and felt confident in the level of care I was receiving. Nothing is perfect, but our health care system gets two thumbs up from me.

As to my house, it's finally coming along. For the longest time after the flood we had torrential down pours, and the ground was too wet for construction crews to do anything. They are finally replacing the foundation of the house, and the garage has been rebuilt. As soon as the foundation is done, I'll have the basement refinished. I'm looking forward to having my house back to normal again.



8) What have been your favorite forum "events"?

My favourite forum event has to be the whole pink vest extravaganza! It was fantastic, winning the bet and sending the vest to frook. What's it's turned into is just amazing! I never would have imagined that I'd get even one guy to wear it, let alone have it embarking on a world tour! Plus we have the pics to prove it, so it really did happen! It's something the whole board can take part in, and enjoy. That makes it worth ever penny I spent on it!

9) What members would you particularly like to meet in real life?

Well I do talk to a lot of forum members outside of the boards already. What I would really like, is for us to be able to have some kind of North American get together. I am insanely jealous of the UK gatherings, and wish we could pull something similar off.

10) What size are you feet?

Hmm I wonder who asked this one.....Maccy! My feet, for all of you who are wondering are a size 7 or 7.5 depending on the shoes. Yes this does put me closer to the sink Maccy, but they are also the perfect size for giving you a good kick in the ass! Damn caveman!

11) If you were stranded on a desert island with only one MBotF, which one is it?

Oh man this is a hard one! Ideally I would like to cheat and bring my Sony reader, so I could have them all with me! If I had to pick one though, it would probably be Reaper's Gale.

12) If you met Steven Erikson and you could only ask one question, what would it be?

Haha, knowing me, I would probably get flustered and ask him how he was doing, thus wasting my one question! Honestly though I would ask him if he were really happy with the way ICE portrayed both the old guard and the crimson guard in ROTCG.

13) Who is you favorite character from the series?

Tehol, but I have a lot of love for Bugg too, because the two of them go hand in hand. Kruppe is a close second though.

14) You seem to be posting less frequently recently, what's up?

It's mostly down to my leg. It's been a real ordeal between rehab, visits to various specialists, and surgery. After the most recent surgery, I was in hospital and hopped up on some fairly impressive pain meds. I was in no shape to post and had about a ten day break from the boards. I am slowly getting back up to my usual level of posting though, so no worries.

15) Who wins?

I'm really competitive, so in a perfect world, the answer would be me! As the world is not perfect, I only win about 90% of the time, but I'll take it!

16) When you're baking pie, what's your favourite kind, also, is it a preference based on ease of cooking or favourite delicious fruit?

I can't bake to save my life! I can cook, but I can bake. I'm sorry to disappoint you Maccy! I worry now that you are going to turn your amorous advances to some other woman! Yes, that's right, it's about time I admit it. I am in love with Maccy ladies and gentlemen! It started out as utter loathing, but somewhere along the way, his cavemanly, sexist, egotistical, pig headed charms started to grow on me! Maybe it's the whole hunter gatherer thing, or the idea of slaving over a stove preparing his meals! Or it could be those massive hands, because you know what they say about a man with big hands!

17) Do you do any creative writing yourself?

No I don't, (other than the answer to the question above) I really wish I could. I have always wanted to be able to write. Being a successful author would be my dream job.

18) When not reading MBotF, what are you typically curling up with?

Well I read a lot of fantasy, but I also love historical fiction, classics and mythology. On the non-fiction front, I am really into ancient history. For the most part I enjoy good long reads that I can get lost in.

19) Do you keep a personal library, or do the books just cycle through your possession?

Oh I'm definitely a collector. My home is full of books! I have six, eight foot bookshelves and two smaller ones and it's still not enough! There are books in boxes, books double stacked, books in closets. It's organized chaos! I definitely have a system and place for everything, that probably only makes sense in my mind. I never throw a book away and I rarely lend them out, they are some of my most valued possessions.

20) Please bare one random little known fact about yourself for the peanut gallery please.

Hmmmm....well I sleep rolled up in my blankets, kind of like a cocoon, head covered, I just leave myself a small breathing hole. My feet always have to be sticking out though, because I have this ridiculous fear that if they don't, I will suffocate. Yes, that's right people I breathe through my feet! LOL :D
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#2 User is offline   HoosierDaddy 

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Posted 03 August 2009 - 11:33 PM

#20, I do that too, except it's a pillow over my face. And, eventually, some enterprising female who is inordinately hacked off at me will end my life with not a bang, but a whimper.
Trouble arrives when the opponents to such a system institute its extreme opposite, where individualism becomes godlike and sacrosanct, and no greater service to any other ideal (including community) is possible. In such a system rapacious greed thrives behind the guise of freedom, and the worst aspects of human nature come to the fore....
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#3 User is offline   Slow Ben 

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Posted 03 August 2009 - 11:39 PM

Damn you Brood you big meany!
I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.
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#4 User is offline   Cold Iron 

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Posted 03 August 2009 - 11:53 PM

Posted Image
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#5 User is offline   Slow Ben 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 12:00 AM

I think i can explain the obsession with boobs in some threads TB.


Guys like boobs, a lot.
I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.
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#6 User is offline   Tiste Simeon 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 12:04 AM

Regarding #12 - Well I was chatting to SE about this and he said he had only read ROTCG once, and that was years ago when the first initial idea had been written.I guess these guys know enough about their world that he doesn't need to read ICE's work. Cool, eh?
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#7 User is offline   Slum 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 12:05 AM

Is that a particularly small shoe size for a woman? I've never paid attention to women's shoe sizes for some reason. :popo:

Thanks for sharing, Tehol. :D
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#8 User is offline   RodeoRanch 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 12:29 AM

Cool stuff.

Brood, you bastard!
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#9 User is offline   Shinrei 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 12:32 AM

My first ever post was poo poo'd by Anomander. I remember that pretty well too :D
You’ve never heard of the Silanda? … It’s the ship that made the Warren of Telas run in less than 12 parsecs.
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#10 User is offline   RodeoRanch 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 12:36 AM

I could not tell what my first post was. Long forgotten.

Course the community was a lot smaller back then.
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#11 User is offline   HoosierDaddy 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 12:41 AM

View PostSlumgullion Spitteler, on Aug 3 2009, 08:05 PM, said:

Is that a particularly small shoe size for a woman? I've never paid attention to women's shoe sizes for some reason. :popo:

Thanks for sharing, Tehol. :D


A 7.5 in female shoes would be a 6.5 in male shoes, at least in the U.S. You know, those stupid tags inside the shoes have 4 different numbers depending up on the locale as to what size it is.
Trouble arrives when the opponents to such a system institute its extreme opposite, where individualism becomes godlike and sacrosanct, and no greater service to any other ideal (including community) is possible. In such a system rapacious greed thrives behind the guise of freedom, and the worst aspects of human nature come to the fore....
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#12 User is offline   teholbeddict 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 12:48 AM

View PostHoosierDaddy, on Aug 3 2009, 07:41 PM, said:

View PostSlumgullion Spitteler, on Aug 3 2009, 08:05 PM, said:

Is that a particularly small shoe size for a woman? I've never paid attention to women's shoe sizes for some reason. :popo:

Thanks for sharing, Tehol. :D


A 7.5 in female shoes would be a 6.5 in male shoes, at least in the U.S. You know, those stupid tags inside the shoes have 4 different numbers depending up on the locale as to what size it is.



Yes even for a woman, a size 7 is on the smaller side. If it's a running shoe, I can often even get away with wearing juniors shoes.

Thanks for the comments everyone!
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#13 User is offline   Terez 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 01:00 AM

I think 8 is about average for female shoe sizes. I have one friend that wears size 5, another that wears size 11.

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#14 User is offline   KalamMekhar 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 01:05 AM

15) Who wins?

I'm really competitive, so in a perfect world, the answer would be me! As the world is not perfect, I only win about 90% of the time, but I'll take it!

You didnt win 99.9% of our wagers!

This post has been edited by KalamMekhar: 04 August 2009 - 01:12 AM

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#15 User is offline   Centzon Totochtin 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 01:07 AM

What size is 7US in UK sizing?
That Elephant is looking rather frayed at the edges
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#16 User is offline   teholbeddict 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 01:10 AM

View PostKalamMekhar, on Aug 3 2009, 08:05 PM, said:

15) Who wins?

I'm really competitive, so in a perfect world, the answer would be me! As the world is not perfect, I only win about 90% of the time, but I'll take it!

You didnt win 99.9% of our wagers!



Well my dear KM, if you read back you will see that I answered 90% of the time! As you only won one out of about ten wagers, I would say that percentenge is spot on! :D
Procrastination is like masturbation, you're only F ing yourself...
-Bubbalicious -

Human progress is neither automatic nor inevitable… Every step toward the goal of justice requires sacrifice, suffering, and struggle; the tireless exertions and passionate concern of dedicated individuals.
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Muffins are just ugly cupcakes!
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#17 User is offline   KalamMekhar 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 01:12 AM

dont make me go back and count all the basketball wagers!
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#18 User is offline   teholbeddict 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 01:14 AM

View PostCentzon Totochtin, on Aug 3 2009, 08:07 PM, said:

What size is 7US in UK sizing?



I checked it out online and apparently a US 7 is equivalent to a UK 4.5
Procrastination is like masturbation, you're only F ing yourself...
-Bubbalicious -

Human progress is neither automatic nor inevitable… Every step toward the goal of justice requires sacrifice, suffering, and struggle; the tireless exertions and passionate concern of dedicated individuals.
- Martin Luther King, Jr-

The only thing one can learn from one's past mistakes is how to repeat them exactly.
-Stone Monkey-

Muffins are just ugly cupcakes!
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#19 User is offline   Centzon Totochtin 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 01:15 AM

HOLY CARP! TINY FEET!
That Elephant is looking rather frayed at the edges
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#20 User is offline   Illuyankas 

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Posted 04 August 2009 - 01:17 AM

Bloody hell, you do have small feet. Unfortunately, that does work out to be less surface area = more pressure = causing John Wayne impersonations.

This post has been edited by Illuyankas: 04 August 2009 - 01:18 AM

Hello, soldiers, look at your mage, now back to me, now back at your mage, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped being an unascended mortal and switched to Sole Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re in a warren with the High Mage your cadre mage could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an acorn with two gates to that realm you love. Look again, the acorn is now otataral. Anything is possible when your mage smells like Sole Spice and not a Bole brother. I’m on a quorl.
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