[Macros]

yes, thats toby laughing it up in the background because he's just pinched his wallet

[The Tyrant Lizard]

I used to get bullied at school coz I couldnt spell armageddon... its not the end of the world.

[Gothos]

Aptorian, on 03 May 2010 - 08:46 PM, said:

is that a picture of TT from the last BBQ?

I actually scrolled up to take a closer look. Damn you.

[HoosierDaddy]

Quote

After the North American Beer Festival, all the brewery presidents decided to go out for a beer.
The guy from Corona sits down and says, "Hey Señor, I would like the world's best beer, a Corona."
The bartender dusts off a bottle from the shelf and gives it to him.
The guy from Budweiser says, "I'd like the best beer in the world, give me 'The King of Beers,' a Budweiser."
The bartender gives him one.

The guy from Coors says, "I'd like the only beer made with Rocky Mountain spring water, give me a Coors." He gets it.
The guy from Molson sits down and says, "Give me a Coke." The bartender is a little taken aback, but gives him what he ordered.
The other brewery presidents look over at him and ask, "Why aren't you drinking a Molson's?"
The Molson president replies, "Well, I figured if you guys aren't drinking beer, neither would I."

Quote

A woman preparing to leave her husband casually informs him, "I'm going to become a hooker. I can make $400 for what I give you for free."

"I'm coming with you," the man replies. "I want to see you live on $800 a year."

Quote

A man and his ever-nagging wife went on vacation to Jerusalem. While they were there, the wife passed away.

The undertaker told the husband, "You can have her shipped home for $5,000, or you can bury her here, in the Holy Land, for $150."

The man thought about it and told him he would just have her shipped home.

The undertaker asked, "Why would you spend $5,000 to ship your wife home, when it would be wonderful to be buried here and you would spend only $150?"

The man replied, "Long ago a man died here, was buried here, and three days later he rose from the dead." Shaking his head, he continued, "I just can't take that chance."

This post has been edited by H.D.: 15 May 2010 - 02:45 AM

[Salt-Man Z]

What do you get when you cross Darth Vader and an elephant?

Spoiler

an elevator

What do you get when you cross an elephant with a rhinoceros?

Spoiler

'ell if I know

[hmqb]

Ready for a long long joke? NOTE: this joke is alot better if you say it out loud. to other people.
Alright, so theres a man on a really long stretch of highway, and its getting dark. He finnaly finds this huge, huge gas station, and walks inside. When he walks inside he sees a woman. The woman offers to let him stay the night as long as he doesn't ask about the noises. So he accepts not wondering what the big deal is. When he goes to bed, he hears all these strange noises and decides he must find out what they are. So in the morning he goes the woman and asks to know the noises were. The woman just replies, "I can't tell you, your not my lawyer". The man dieing to know what the noise are go's off and gets a law degree, when he comes back he asks to be the womans lawyer. She accepts and when he asked agian to find out what the noises are she replies by saying, "I can't tell you, you have to see for yourself," The women gives him a Red key and tells him to go open that door in the back and to just follow the stairs. He goes to the red door and opens it with the key.
He goes up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. Then up some stairs and down some stairs. When finnaly he reaches a blue door, and what do you know its locked. He then goes Down some stairs and up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs. Then down some stairs then up some stairs.
When he finnaly opens the red door and goes to the women, she just hands him a blue key and waves him away. So he goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, When he reaches the blue door.
He opens it to find more stairs, so he goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, When finnaly he reaches a purple door, now hes saying oh shit heres a purple door now! hAving gone so far already he heads Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, When he reaches the blue door, He passes right by and goes Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, When he gets to the bottem floor. The women hand him the purple key. The man being carful asks if he will need to come back down to get another key, she tells him this is the last one.
So he opens the red door and goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, When he reaches the blue door. He then goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, When finnaly he reaches the purple door, he put the key in the lock and twists, all he finds is more stairs, so he goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs,
When he reaches a golden door, Oh no he thinks! He trys the door and what do you know its locked. So he heads down the stairs at a run Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, reaching the the purple door and just heads Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, When he passes the blue door he just heads Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, He finnaly gets back to the women.
"You lied!" he yells, but she just hands him the golden key and he does what he came here to do, he goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, when he reaches the blue door he goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, the reaching the purple door he goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Reaching the golden door he opens it to find a twisty hall way, He is so realived not to find more stairs he runs down the hallway turning right, left, right, left,right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left,
Until he reaches a multicolored door. He pulls on the door and what do you know, its locked. He runs back downthe hallway left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, When he reaches the golden door he travels Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Until the purple door where he travels Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, When he reaches the blue door he travels Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs,
When he finnaly gets to the red door, he realized he dropped the key back at the golden door, so he goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, passing the blue door he goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, passing the purple door he goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, passing the golden door he grabs the red key.
He then travels Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Where he passes the purple door he goes Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, where he passes the blue door he goes Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs,
He finnaly arrives back at the red door and he opens it. he find the women and demands the multicolored key. She tells him its at the bottem of this et of stairs, so he sets off down a new set of stairs. He travels down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down, and down,
He finnaly gets to the bottem and grabs the multi colored key. He travels up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, and up, where he finnaly opens the dor and finds the women.
She then points him on to the red door and he opens it and goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, where he reaches the blue door and goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, when he finnaly gets to the purple door he goes Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, where he gets to the golden door he goes right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left,
He finnaly arrived at the multicolored door, he had a feeling this was the end. He put the lock in and opened the door, and do you know what he saw?
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He saw a long twisted hallway so he went right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, Until he arrived at a small wooden door.
He tried to smash down the door ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian, then ramming it, then ramming it agian,
After all his efforts he realized he would need the key. He walked left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, Until he arrived at the multicolored door where he walked left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, Where arrives at the golden door going Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Arriving at the purple door traveling Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, arriving at the blue door traveling Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs,
He finnaly got to the red door where he walked past it to find the women. She quickly told he that the wooden door wasn't even locked, feeling like a fool he walked past the red door and went Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, past the blue door Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, past the purple door Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, Up some stairs, Down some stairs, past the golden door where he went right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, arriving at the multicolored door where he went right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, right, left, He finnaly arrived.
He stared at the door and opened it, what he saw shocked him to his very core. Do you know what he saw?
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Well keep wondering because I can't tell you, your not my lawyer.

lol

[Fist Gamet]

Ffffffffffffffffffffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu...

[masan's saddle]

This maybe too soon.............


1976 - Robert De Niro, Taxi Driver - 3 Oscars and 2 Emmys
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2010 - Derrick Bird , Taxi Driver - 1 Oscar, 3 Tonys, 2 Emmas, 1 Gary, 2 Janes, a Mark and 2 Billys.

[Salt-Man Z]

A friend asked me: if I could be any animal, which would I be? I said an eagle. He said, why, so you can fly? I said, no...so I can finally have sex with eagles.


Doogie Horner is hilarious.

[The Crazy Mob]

Iron Man is a superhero.

Iron Woman is a command.


American scientists have finally developed a car that runs on water!

Sadly, so far it only works with the water from the Gulf of Mexico


These new 3D TVs are so realistic. I fell asleep whilst watching a Liverpool game and when I woke my wallet was gone.


This new "in private" browsing mode in Internet Explorer is rubbish. Everyone in the internet cafe can still see me w*nking.

[Raymond Luxury Yacht]

My friends told me I am too patronizing. (That's when you talk to people like they are stupid.)

[The Crazy Mob]

Military Intelligence

[Aptorian]

A soldier stationed in Afghanistan recently received a "Dear John" letter from his girlfriend back home.

"Dear Ricky, I can no longer continue our relationship, The distance between us is just too great. I must admit that I have cheated on you twice, since you've been gone, and it's not fair to either of us. I'm sorry. Please return the picture of me that I sent for you. Love, Becky"

The soldier, with hurt feelings, asked his fellow soldiers for any snapshots they could spare of their girlfriends, sisters, ex girlfriends, aunts, cousins etc. In addition to the picture of Becky. Ricky included all the other pictures of the pretty gals he had collected from his buddies. There were 56 photos in that envelope ... along with this note :

"Dear Becky I'm so sorry, but I can't quite remember who you are. Please take your picture from the pile, and send the rest back to me."

[masan's saddle]

Why did the chicken cross the road ?

Well actually it didn't cos FIFA says so.


In other news, the MET office issued a localised extreme weather warning for the London area. Apparently an enormous shower of shit was expected to arrive last night.

[Macros]

Nelson Mandela is sitting at home watching TV and drinking a beer when he hears a knock at the door. when he opens it, he is confronted by a little Chinese man, clutching a clip board and yelling, 'You Sign! You sign!' Behind him is an enormous truck full of car exhausts.
Nelson is standing there in complete amazement, when the Chinese man starts to yell louder,
'You Sign! You sign!'
Nelson says to him, 'Look, you've obviously got the wrong man', and shuts the door in his face.
The next day he hears a knock at the door again.
When he opens it, the little Chinese man is back with a huge truck of brake pads.
He thrusts his clipboard under Nelson's nose, yelling,
'You sign! You sign!'
Mr Mandela is getting a bit hacked off by now, so he pushes the little Chinese man back, shouting, 'Look, go away! You've got the wrong man. I don't want them!' Then he slams the door in his face again.
The following day, Nelson is resting, and late in the afternoon, he hears a knock on the door again.
On opening the door, there is the same little Chinese man thrusting a clipboard under his nose, shouting, 'You sign! You sign!'
Behind him are TWO very large trucks full of car parts.
This time Nelson loses his temper completely, he picks up the little Man by his shirt front and yells at him, 'Look, I don't want these! Do you understand? You must have the wrong name! Who do you want to give these to?'
The little Chinese man looks very puzzled, consults his clipboard, and say, 'You not Nissan Main Deala?'

[AlanH]

An email exchange between an Arab student and his Dad.

"Dear Dad,

Berlin is wonderful, people are nice, and I really like it here. But Dad I am a bit ashamed to arrive at university every day in my pure gold Ferrari when other teachers and my fellow students travel by train.

Your son, Nasser"

A few days later he gets this reply:

"My Dear Loving Son,

Twenty million USD have been transferred to your bank account. Please stop embarrassing us and go buy a train yourself.

Your Loving Father"

[Salt-Man Z]

Random-person-I-don't-know posted this as a comment on Facebook:

Quote

A little boy is playing with his new football and a little girl asks if she can play. He tells her, "No. These are for boys."

The little girl runs into the house and tells her mother. The next day the girl sticks her tongue out at the boy...and waves her new football in his face. The little boy angrily points to his boy's bike and says, "Oh yeah? Well, only boys can get these!"

But the next day, the little girl has the same bike. The little boy gets furious, pulls down his pants, points to his unit, and says, "Look, only boys have these and your mom can't buy you one!"

The next day he walks by and the little girl promptly pulls up her dress, points to her bits, and proclaims, "My mother tells me that as long as I have one of these, I can have as many of those as I want."

[Beezulbubba]

I visited a lair of vampires who were vacuum salesmen..... it sucked on many levels.
* http://soundfxnow.co...ad-Trombone.mp3


<sorry.... heard that joke in the game DeathSpank and thought it was funny>

[Beezulbubba]

Two rednecks are sitting on a porch, bored.

The first redneck says, "Ya know, i'm tired just sittin here."

The second redneck says, "yeah, well whatcha wanna do?"

First redneck replies: "Let's play a game"

Second Redneck: "Ok, what ya wanna play?"

First redneck: "Let's play a game....ummm.....it's called 20 questions"

Second redneck: "How do you play it?"

First redneck: "Well, I'm gonna think of a word and you have 20 questions you can use to figure out what that word is."

Second Redneck: "Ok. Lemme know when you think of a word."

First redneck thinks and thinks and he finally comes up with 'donkeydick' . . . "he'll never guess donkeydick!"

First redneck: "Ok i got one. Go ahead and start ask'n."

Second redneck: "Ok, well, umm......well, can you eat it?"

First redneck thinks for a bit, then replies: "Well yes......I suppose you can eat it"

Second redneck asks: "Is it a donkeydick?"

[footy_]

When God created Adam and Eva, he called them and said:'Now I have 2 things to give you ,1 for each of you.For you Adam I have this.'And he gave him a penis.Adam was so happy, he started screaming of joy and running around.God looked at him for about a minute and said to Eva:"Well...The thing i was gonna give you is a brain, but now i will have to give it to Adam or he will pee all over the place..."