Malazan Empire: The corrupt a wish game. - Malazan Empire

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The corrupt a wish game.

#861 User is offline   Jade-Green Pig-Hog Swine-Beast 

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Posted 08 March 2012 - 01:41 PM

Granted. You manage to save several days worth of time but when you go to use it you discover that it's gone mouldy and you have to throw it away.

I wish my plans would work put for once, instead of failing and plunging me back into a world of misery.
The love I bear thee can afford no better term than this: thou art a villain.

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#862 User is offline   powerclaw 

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Posted 08 March 2012 - 02:16 PM

Fate decides to be kind and one of your plans succeeds! Unfortunately, fate decides to favor your plan to have breakfast in the morning (delicious!) over your much more complicated plan to actually make it to work so you don't get fired.

I wish I could slack off whenever I wanted at work and my boss would never catch me at it or even suspect.
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#863 User is offline   Azathmaster 

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Posted 10 March 2012 - 11:58 PM

View Postpowerclaw, on 08 March 2012 - 02:16 PM, said:

Fate decides to be kind and one of your plans succeeds! Unfortunately, fate decides to favor your plan to have breakfast in the morning (delicious!) over your much more complicated plan to actually make it to work so you don't get fired.

I wish I could slack off whenever I wanted at work and my boss would never catch me at it or even suspect.


Granted, you master the art of sneakily slacking, but your time wasting methods catch up on you, and you become obese from all of your lazy snacking.

I wish I got more financial aid from my first choice school.
"To victory! It feels unfamiliar, but it tastes like chicken"
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#864 User is offline   Gust Hubb 

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Posted 11 March 2012 - 12:16 AM

Granted, but in the interest is steep and soon they own you, not that they didn't in the first place.

I wish I could have two days school free instead of this 1 day per week crap.
"You don't clean u other peoples messes.... You roll in them like a dog on leftover smoked whitefish torn out f the trash by raccoons after Sunday brunch on a hot day."
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#865 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 12 March 2012 - 05:53 AM

View PostGust Hubb, on 11 March 2012 - 12:16 AM, said:

I wish I could have two days school free instead of this 1 day per week crap.



Granted.
Because two of your courses are cancelled. Now you have to do an entire additional semester. Part time. When you have better things to be doing.
Like making money and spending it.
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#866 User is offline   Mrs Savagely Wishy Washy 

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Posted 12 March 2012 - 06:04 AM

View PostAbyss, on 12 March 2012 - 05:53 AM, said:

View PostGust Hubb, on 11 March 2012 - 12:16 AM, said:

I wish I could have two days school free instead of this 1 day per week crap.



Granted.
Because two of your courses are cancelled. Now you have to do an entire additional semester. Part time. When you have better things to be doing.
Like making money and spending it.


I wish? ..... Abyss had wished something delicious for me to corrupt.
but are they worth preserving?
'that judgement does not belong to you.'
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#867 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

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Posted 12 March 2012 - 06:19 AM

Granted. Unfortunately, it is only considered delicious by middle-aged onion farmers from Indochina. This demographic does not suit you, presumably, and the thing that Abyss gives you had the flavour of sunbleached bounder.

I wish that The Naked and Famous were playing their own show in Melbourne :p

EDIT: So there IS a profanity filter...

This post has been edited by Ain't_It_Just_: 12 March 2012 - 06:20 AM

Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


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#868 User is offline   rhulad 

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Posted 13 March 2012 - 04:45 PM

Granted, but they are playing right now. And only one song, The macarena, over and over again.

I wish that that fucking cat would stay off of my front porch.
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#869 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 13 March 2012 - 05:03 PM

Granted. Now the fucking llama is on your front porch. making massive steaming piles of llama crap EVERYWHERE. and humping the porch furniture. because it is a fucking llama, after all.

I wish i had added a wish to my previous post.
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#870 User is offline   wade 

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Posted 13 March 2012 - 05:07 PM

View PostAbyss, on 13 March 2012 - 05:03 PM, said:

Granted. Now the fucking llama is on your front porch. making massive steaming piles of llama crap EVERYWHERE. and humping the porch furniture. because it is a fucking llama, after all.

I wish i had added a wish to my previous post.


You didn't.

I wish I had a more interesting username.
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#871 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 13 March 2012 - 05:29 PM

View Postwade-newb, on 13 March 2012 - 05:07 PM, said:

I wish I had a more interesting username.


Granted. Your username is now 'the more interesting wade-newb'.


I wish all wishes could be so easily corrupted with my mighty admin-god powers.
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#872 User is offline   rhulad 

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Posted 13 March 2012 - 06:40 PM

Granted, now all wishes can be corrupted by your admin-god powers. Sadly the other mod-gods become jealous of your abuse of power and cast you out from the abyss into regular user-dom.

I wish someone would bring me a beer.
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#873 User is offline   powerclaw 

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Posted 13 March 2012 - 08:24 PM

Granted. You now owe me $3.00 for the beer, $560 for travel expenses, and $200 in lost wages. Worth it?

I wish I could get a free beer right now.
"Never let your morals stand in the way of doing what is right."
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#874 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 13 March 2012 - 08:43 PM

View Postpowerclaw, on 13 March 2012 - 08:24 PM, said:

I wish I could get a free beer right now.


You can. If you can find me in the next five minutes this nice frosty mug of awesome microbrew draft beer is all yours.
4:59... 4:58... 4:57...


I wish i didn't have to wait another 4min and 56 seconds to drink this beer.
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#875 User is offline   rhulad 

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Posted 13 March 2012 - 09:23 PM

Granted. The beer is coors.

I wish I didn't have to wait until after work to go meet my new niece.
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#876 User is offline   Mrs Savagely Wishy Washy 

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 12:11 PM

Granted. You can leave work now to see your niece, she is lovely and the cutest baby anyone has ever seen and you're happy proud and all uncle and what not. Less fortunate is the fact that you don't have to return to work neither tomorrow nor ever again.
Good luck looking for a new job.

I wish I had a big fat carnitas burrito with guacamole, sourcream and nachos for lunch, not that measly fridge-luck salad I made up in a rush this morning.

but are they worth preserving?
'that judgement does not belong to you.'
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#877 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 02:14 PM

View PostMiss Savage, on 14 March 2012 - 12:11 PM, said:

I wish I had a big fat carnitas burrito with guacamole, sourcream and nachos for lunch, not that measly fridge-luck salad I made up in a rush this morning.


Granted. But your Dr just called and you're allergic to guacamole, sourcream and nachos. Convulsively fatally so.

I wish my workplace provided an awesome ayce breakfast buffet every morning.

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#878 User is offline   QuickTidal 

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 02:47 PM

View PostAbyss, on 14 March 2012 - 02:14 PM, said:

I wish my workplace provided an awesome ayce breakfast buffet every morning.[/font]



Granted. Congratulations, you now work at A Husky Truck Stop. The buffet is awesome, but the job kinda sucks.

I wish projectile weapons were never invented and we all still wore swords to defend our (and other people's) honour.

This post has been edited by QuickTidal: 14 March 2012 - 02:47 PM

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#879 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 03:00 PM

View PostQuickTidal, on 14 March 2012 - 02:47 PM, said:

I wish projectile weapons were never invented and we all still wore swords to defend our (and other people's) honour.


Granted. At your first duel, you are crippled and maimed when your opponent throws his sword at you.

I wish people would stop asking me stupid questions and just do the damn work.
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#880 User is offline   rhulad 

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Posted 14 March 2012 - 03:06 PM

Granted, now they just do the work wrong and you have to fix it.

I wish there was a more efficient way of getting coffee in the morning.
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