Malazan Empire: Epic Poetry - Lets get creative - Malazan Empire

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Epic Poetry - Lets get creative First Homer, Then Virgil, Followed by Milton and now...Malazanempire

#1 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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Posted 25 November 2008 - 09:28 PM

For a brief time today the forum was down and I spent some time in the Nascent with some of the regulars...It was quiet, too quiet so I decided to make things more like the phoenix inn and added some threads I like:

First word to come to mind.

Guess next

and Lets write something epic.

The idea behind the Epic thread is for us to write a story by adding one word and I tried to recreate it, but Tapper, who you may know, in a fit of brilliance bounced the idea into poetry. Between Tapper, Bent and I we managed to come up with this in no time at all:

Quote

There was a man from Quon Tali,
Who went to Assail to ski,
Got stuck in the middle of a war,
he ended up with a nasty scar,
And thought " these things always happen to me"

There was once a battle on the Jhag Odham plains
Which of course Brood was to blame
It started with a kiss
given by a sexy T'lan I-miss
who promised to stand by my side forever

Once Caladan Brood swung his hammer
It takes very little for Kruppe to throw in the spanner


I'm afraid the first and last lines are mine :rant: ...But there is some potential in there. I'm going to stick as much as possible to the iambic pentameter, but only if you really want to...Just add your line and watch the epic grow ;)

So without further ado...
souls are for wimps
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#2 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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Posted 25 November 2008 - 09:29 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
souls are for wimps
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#3 User is offline   Jude 

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Posted 25 November 2008 - 09:44 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
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#4 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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Posted 25 November 2008 - 10:22 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
souls are for wimps
0

#5 User is offline   Jude 

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Posted 25 November 2008 - 10:23 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips
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#6 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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Posted 25 November 2008 - 10:28 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips LoL

And people would come from miles all around
souls are for wimps
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#7 User is offline   Ain't_It_Just_ 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 09:35 AM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Suck it Errant!


"It's time to kick ass and chew bubblegum...and I'm all out of gum."

QUOTE (KeithF @ Jun 30 2009, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It has been proven beyond all reasonable doubt that the most powerful force on Wu is a bunch of messed-up Malazans with Moranth munitions.


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#8 User is offline   Tapper 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 12:47 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Everyone is entitled to his own wrong opinion. - Lizrad
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#9 User is offline   Mezla PigDog 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 01:01 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Where he jiggled and wiggled with all of his might
Burn rubber =/= warp speed
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#10 User is offline   Tapper 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 01:03 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Where he jiggled and wiggled with all of his might

The Lord of Disco witnessed this dance
Everyone is entitled to his own wrong opinion. - Lizrad
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#11 User is offline   Mezla PigDog 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 01:08 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Where he jiggled and wiggled with all of his might

The Lord of Disco witnessed this dance
And so awed was he by this epic prance
Burn rubber =/= warp speed
0

#12 User is offline   Hinter 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 01:08 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Where he jiggled and wiggled with all of his might

The Lord of Disco witnessed this dance
Whilst strutting his stuff to techno and trance
0

#13 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 01:58 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Where he jiggled and wiggled with all of his might

The Lord of Disco witnessed this dance
And so awed was he by this epic prance
to the pilgrim he gave a huge advance
Whilst strutting his stuff to techno and trance

well...its sorta fixed :rant:
souls are for wimps
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#14 User is offline   Bent 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 02:13 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Where he jiggled and wiggled with all of his might

The Lord of Disco witnessed this dance
And so awed was he by this epic prance
to the pilgrim he gave a huge advance
Whilst strutting his stuff to techno and trance

He walked through the warrens
THIS IS HOW I ROLL BITCHES!!!
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#15 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 02:54 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Where he jiggled and wiggled with all of his might

The Lord of Disco witnessed this dance
And so awed was he by this epic prance
to the pilgrim he gave a huge advance
Whilst strutting his stuff to techno and trance

He walked through the warrens
with a bunch of people who were morons
souls are for wimps
0

#16 User is offline   Bent 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 03:14 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Where he jiggled and wiggled with all of his might

The Lord of Disco witnessed this dance
And so awed was he by this epic prance
to the pilgrim he gave a huge advance
Whilst strutting his stuff to techno and trance

He walked through the warrens
with a bunch of people who were morons
He cursed them and smited(smote?) them
THIS IS HOW I ROLL BITCHES!!!
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#17 User is offline   frookenhauer 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 03:29 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Where he jiggled and wiggled with all of his might

The Lord of Disco witnessed this dance
And so awed was he by this epic prance
to the pilgrim he gave a huge advance
Whilst strutting his stuff to techno and trance

He walked through the warrens
with a bunch of people who were morons
He cursed them and smited(smote?) them
In his anger he set their hair aflame
souls are for wimps
0

#18 User is offline   Bauchelain the Evil 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 04:17 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Where he jiggled and wiggled with all of his might

The Lord of Disco witnessed this dance
And so awed was he by this epic prance
to the pilgrim he gave a huge advance
Whilst strutting his stuff to techno and trance

He walked through the warrens
with a bunch of people who were morons
He cursed them and smited(smote?) them
In his anger he set their hair aflame

And while they were all burning
Adept of Team Quick Ben

I greet you as guests and so will not crush the life from you and devour your soul with peals of laughter. No, instead, I will make tea-Gothos
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#19 User is offline   Jude 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 05:47 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Where he jiggled and wiggled with all of his might

The Lord of Disco witnessed this dance
And so awed was he by this epic prance
to the pilgrim he gave a huge advance
Whilst strutting his stuff to techno and trance

He walked through the warrens
with a bunch of people who were morons
He cursed them and smited(smote?) them
In his anger he set their hair aflame

And while they were burning there arose a soft churning in the gut of the south going Pilgrim
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#20 User is offline   Bent 

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Posted 26 November 2008 - 05:53 PM

They say there was a man from Quon Tali
A pilgrim come new to south Cali
With Staff in hand and a prayer on lips
He jiggled and wiggled and waggled his hips

And people would come from miles all around
Took a shortcut through the Warren of Sound
Then went straight into the warren of Light
Where he jiggled and wiggled with all of his might

The Lord of Disco witnessed this dance
And so awed was he by this epic prance
to the pilgrim he gave a huge advance
Whilst strutting his stuff to techno and trance

He walked through the warrens
with a bunch of people who were morons
He cursed them and smited(smote?) them
In his anger he set their hair aflame

And while they were burning
there arose a soft churning
in the gut of the south going Pilgrim
And when they fell down

~Fixed
THIS IS HOW I ROLL BITCHES!!!
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