Malazan Empire: What's messing with your groove? - Malazan Empire

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What's messing with your groove?

#29141 User is offline   amphibian 

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Posted 02 November 2022 - 04:48 PM

 Lady Bliss, on 01 November 2022 - 09:46 PM, said:

That sounds frighteningly stupid. I burn ridiculously easy and can’t imagine doing that.

In other news being out of it from the dislocated shoulder cost me the job so I am now unemployed with no safety net. Hopefully something else comes up soon…

Wait, what? Did you have the job already or were offered it? There may be protections and legal recourse available to you.
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#29142 User is offline   Lady Bliss 

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Posted 02 November 2022 - 05:21 PM

 amphibian, on 02 November 2022 - 04:48 PM, said:

 Lady Bliss, on 01 November 2022 - 09:46 PM, said:

That sounds frighteningly stupid. I burn ridiculously easy and can’t imagine doing that.

In other news being out of it from the dislocated shoulder cost me the job so I am now unemployed with no safety net. Hopefully something else comes up soon…

Wait, what? Did you have the job already or were offered it? There may be protections and legal recourse available to you.

Yes I was offered it and accepted but they rescinded when I couldn’t start on time. I’m going to see if I qualify for unemployment. Luckily I am talking to some recruiters, so hopefully something new comes along quickly.
"If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die? And if you wrong us shall we not revenge?" - Shylock
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#29143 User is offline   amphibian 

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Posted 02 November 2022 - 05:59 PM

A dislocated shoulder is a temporary disability and in the US, the Equal Employment Opportunity Commission has made several rulings protecting people who have delayed start dates due to a disability. The important part is "with or without reasonable accommodations, can you do the job?" And they thought so, hence the hire.

It's possible that you could file an EEOC or state human rights complaint right now for this - although that may affect unemployment benefits.

This post has been edited by amphibian: 02 November 2022 - 06:00 PM

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#29144 User is offline   Raymond Luxury Yacht 

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Posted 03 November 2022 - 07:02 PM

I’m pretty sure I have an eating disorder. Which is strange, as I am a grown-ass man and not a teenage girl.

Also I’m potty training my little guy and the peeing is going great but the poop is a struggle. And by struggle I mean steaming pant loads. My wife has been working insane hours or traveling so I’m doing it alone. It’s been a long month of lonely dad duty.
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#29145 User is offline   Tiste Simeon 

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Posted 04 November 2022 - 09:17 AM

 Tiste Simeon, on 31 October 2022 - 04:09 AM, said:

And now I just tested positive for COVID. Grand. Just what we need.

One of the twins now has COVID just as we were all beginning to get through this...
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#29146 User is offline   Lady Bliss 

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Posted 04 November 2022 - 09:46 AM

 Raymond Luxury Yacht, on 03 November 2022 - 07:02 PM, said:

I’m pretty sure I have an eating disorder. Which is strange, as I am a grown-ass man and not a teenage girl.

Also I’m potty training my little guy and the peeing is going great but the poop is a struggle. And by struggle I mean steaming pant loads. My wife has been working insane hours or traveling so I’m doing it alone. It’s been a long month of lonely dad duty.

How old is he? My son had the same problem and I fixed it by making him deal with changing his own diaper.
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#29147 User is offline   Lady Bliss 

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Posted 04 November 2022 - 09:47 AM

 Tiste Simeon, on 04 November 2022 - 09:17 AM, said:

 Tiste Simeon, on 31 October 2022 - 04:09 AM, said:

And now I just tested positive for COVID. Grand. Just what we need.

One of the twins now has COVID just as we were all beginning to get through this...

Ugh that stinks. Hope they feel better soon!
"If you prick us do we not bleed? If you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die? And if you wrong us shall we not revenge?" - Shylock
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#29148 User is offline   Tiste Simeon 

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Posted 04 November 2022 - 12:18 PM

 Raymond Luxury Yacht, on 03 November 2022 - 07:02 PM, said:

I’m pretty sure I have an eating disorder. Which is strange, as I am a grown-ass man and not a teenage girl.

Dude this doesn't sound good, hope you're ok!
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#29149 User is offline   Raymond Luxury Yacht 

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Posted 06 November 2022 - 12:14 AM

 Lady Bliss, on 04 November 2022 - 09:46 AM, said:

 Raymond Luxury Yacht, on 03 November 2022 - 07:02 PM, said:

I’m pretty sure I have an eating disorder. Which is strange, as I am a grown-ass man and not a teenage girl.

Also I’m potty training my little guy and the peeing is going great but the poop is a struggle. And by struggle I mean steaming pant loads. My wife has been working insane hours or traveling so I’m doing it alone. It’s been a long month of lonely dad duty.

How old is he? My son had the same problem and I fixed it by making him deal with changing his own diaper.

He just turned three so he’s not old enough for that yet. He can tear them off to get on the potty but I don’t think he could put another one back on.
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#29150 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 06 November 2022 - 10:05 PM

 Raymond Luxury Yacht, on 06 November 2022 - 12:14 AM, said:

 Lady Bliss, on 04 November 2022 - 09:46 AM, said:

 Raymond Luxury Yacht, on 03 November 2022 - 07:02 PM, said:

I'm pretty sure I have an eating disorder. Which is strange, as I am a grown-ass man and not a teenage girl.

Also I'm potty training my little guy and the peeing is going great but the poop is a struggle. And by struggle I mean steaming pant loads. My wife has been working insane hours or traveling so I'm doing it alone. It's been a long month of lonely dad duty.

How old is he? My son had the same problem and I fixed it by making him deal with changing his own diaper.

He just turned three so he's not old enough for that yet. He can tear them off to get on the potty but I don't think he could put another one back on.


Consider trying the 'training pants' that are more like underwear than diapers.
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#29151 User is online   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

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Posted 08 November 2022 - 08:01 PM

Woke up Saturday morning to find half my living room carpet was soaked through and the ceiling was cracked. Notified maintenance (which I'm loathe to do because of the pandemic, especially since they're not wearing masks and the variants now are more contagious than ever... (and seem to keeping getting more contagious than ever...)). Thought my old weatherproof boots would protect my feet but one of them had water coming in until I realized I could prevent that by walking on the heel, with the toes up in the air. Empty some plastic bins for the ceiling, dug fan and blowdryer out of storage. Expecting maintenance to come any minute all day, I kept my P100 mask on---tight enough to eventually be painful, though I did allow myself the luxury of occasionally shifting the strap.

Woke at 5:30 AM to be sure I'd have time to eat and defecate before maintenance might arrived---but first shaved and got my mask ready, having it nearby at all times in case they barged in. Carpet still soaked, so I moved some plastic bins to help it dry faster and saw black mold. (Not particularly worried about black mold since I've been exposed to it before without having any obvious allergic reaction or negative health consequences. Granted, there are different species, but the so-called 'toxic black mold' is apparently only toxic for people who are allergic or (apparently in some cases) who have weakened immune systems.) Had to move one of my bookshelves, but it's a backless wire bookshelf, so in order to move it without risk of books falling out I had to remove all the books (about a few hundred), check them for moisture and mold, and find places to put them. Reported mold to maintenance. Looked up whether using a fan is a bad idea when there's mold---answer apparently yes (thankfully I had turned the fan off overnight, lest the neighbors complain about the noise, so it wasn't on when I uncovered the mold). Was pretty sure maintenance would arrive promptly to deal with the mold before it spread, but no. Considered using white vinegar, bleach, or the bleachless mold removal spray I have, but was concerned apartment manager or maintenace might object---in retrospect I should have asked them. Though again I was expecting them any second. Nothing. Realized I'd probably have to move all the furniture from the damp half of the carpet, but the furniture had a ton of stuff on it (mostly electronics, musical instruments, etc.). Started doing that.

Hadn't cleaned or dusted in a long time, got concerned I might get a threat of eviction or a fine (happened once before) for not keeping my apartment clean enough so I started dusting and scrubbing. Noticed black specks in the water and started worrying it could be feces until I looked closer. A few years ago one of my meditation cushions---I read that it was good to get a special sort of traditional meditation cushion that's filled with buckwheat iirc---broke, and the filling turned out to be tiny black particles which the cat proceeded to scatter all over the apartment. So that's what they were. But I was worried maintenance might mistake them for feces and insist that I throw out the furniture. So I was obsessively trying to sweep them up---frequently having to pick them up with my fingers, one by one.

Maintenance still didn't come. Thought they probably wanted to find and stop the leaks before entering, worried they might want to wait until it started leaking again. But since it was coming in through the bottom of the wall, not just the ceiling, plastic bins wouldn't be enough... and a second leak of similar magnitude could have soaked the other half of my living room, including my large sectional sofa. So I started putting everything in plastic bags.

Monday came about, and the cracks in the ceiling started dripping again, so I put down plastic bins and notified maintenance as it was happening. Really thought they'd arrive promptly this time. No, of course not. They arrived a few hours later, about an hour before I had set a reminder to order same day delivery for one of the top recommended mold removers and scrub brush sets to get rid of as much of the mold as I could myself. Turned out they had already taken care of the leak through the bottom of the wall, and set to investigating the ceiling. Thankfully they think they've found it. They said they'd use fans to dry out the wall and carpet---when I asked about the fans spreading mold, they said they'd treat it first and that it wouldn't be a concern. Hope they're right. They also claimed they have a water extractor that will be able to take care of the carpet without having to pull it up all through the affected area and use a fan on the pads. Left two fans blaring.

Said they'd be back early this afternoon. After 3 pm now and I'm still waiting.

Pennsylvania website says the ballot I mailed in a few weeks ago still hasn't been received. I'd considered walking a mile and a half to the nearest drop box after my elderly mother told me about people stealing checks from Philadelphia mail boxes, but thought the risk of it getting stolen or lost in the mail was astronomically low, plus I didn't want to exacerbate my toe injury, so I just mailed it. Philadelphia released a list of people who had filled out their ballots incorrectly and who had the opportunity to correct them, but I wasn't on it. Tried searching for what to do if you mail the ballot and it gets lost in the mail---only found results for what to do if the ballot gets lost in the mail en route to you. Could try calling the hotline but would almost certainly be on hold for hours, possibly not get through. Guess I could try to file a provisional ballot... and possibly then get charged with voter fraud. It's possible that it's an error on the website, or that they simply haven't gone through all the ballots they've received---thought maybe it was because Pennsylvania law forbids them from opening mail-in ballots until election day, but other people have been getting notifications their ballots were received.

If it was lost in the mail (or stolen), hopefully there aren't many more people who that's happened to... especially in Democratic strongholds like Philadelphia.

(Today is election day, so I have until the polls close to cast a provisional ballot....)
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#29152 User is offline   Abyss 

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Posted 11 November 2022 - 05:04 PM

RIP Kevin Conroy.

...this is upsetting me WAY more than i would ever have expected.
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#29153 User is offline   worry 

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Posted 11 November 2022 - 05:20 PM

A true legend.


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#29154 User is offline   Maark Abbott 

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Posted 14 November 2022 - 08:51 AM

Back to work after a week off. Time to suffer, then.
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#29155 User is offline   QuickTidal 

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Posted 14 November 2022 - 03:33 PM

Mom had a bunch of things occur that have forced her into the hospital palliative care and she's been told that she would not be going home again. We went on the weekend and stayed up there with her (she's not in a private room sadly, so visiting was hard). I held her hand and told her all the things I wanted her to know, and told her I was sorry I could not fix her. My kids are both a little young to know what's really going on. My son being only 4 is always kind of shy when you ask him to do things, so trying to get him to hug her and tell her he loves her was difficult, and my daughter at 6 knows something is up and she's a little scared to do the same. Both of those things are heartbreaking, but how do you tell two such young kids "This may be the last time you have with your grandma"? It's not a winnable scenario, and I can't hold it against them.

I don't know how long she has left. She's not eating much (can't keep much down), and is not on an IV....she can barely move her legs (blood clots and swelling) has a pulmonary embolism in her chest. The pain meds and anxiety meds make her intensely tired and she drifts in and our of consciousness.

This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. My sister is with her today, so that's good. She's had many visitors over the last few days.

Last night I was on the phone with her before she went to sleep fo the night and she told me not to cry, and I cried that I wasn't, and she chuckled a bit and said "Yes you are". I said "nite nite mom, I love you" and I spent the rest of the night worrying if those would be my last words to her.

It's probably days now...and I have no idea how I'm going to handle this. I'm already broken into pieces at the prospect.
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#29156 User is offline   TheRetiredBridgeburner 

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Posted 14 November 2022 - 03:36 PM

 QuickTidal, on 14 November 2022 - 03:33 PM, said:

Mom had a bunch of things occur that have forced her into the hospital palliative care and she's been told that she would not be going home again. We went on the weekend and stayed up there with her (she's not in a private room sadly, so visiting was hard). I held her hand and told her all the things I wanted her to know, and told her I was sorry I could not fix her. My kids are both a little young to know what's really going on. My son being only 4 is always kind of shy when you ask him to do things, so trying to get him to hug her and tell her he loves her was difficult, and my daughter at 6 knows something is up and she's a little scared to do the same. Both of those things are heartbreaking, but how do you tell two such young kids "This may be the last time you have with your grandma"? It's not a winnable scenario, and I can't hold it against them.

I don't know how long she has left. She's not eating much (can't keep much down), and is not on an IV....she can barely move her legs (blood clots and swelling) has a pulmonary embolism in her chest. The pain meds and anxiety meds make her intensely tired and she drifts in and our of consciousness.

This is the hardest thing I've ever had to do. My sister is with her today, so that's good. She's had many visitors over the last few days.

Last night I was on the phone with her before she went to sleep fo the night and she told me not to cry, and I cried that I wasn't, and she chuckled a bit and said "Yes you are". I said "nite nite mom, I love you" and I spent the rest of the night worrying if those would be my last words to her.

It's probably days now...and I have no idea how I'm going to handle this. I'm already broken into pieces at the prospect.


I'm so sorry QT. Nothing I can add except love to you and your family.
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#29157 User is offline   amphibian 

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Posted 14 November 2022 - 03:39 PM

You're handling this as best as a human possibly could. You're arranging for time with her, staying connected to your family, and grieving in a super understandable way.

I'm sorry it's happening and I hope she's able to go in a way she's ok with.
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#29158 User is offline   Tiste Simeon 

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Posted 14 November 2022 - 04:19 PM

QT there's nothing easy about this and I'm so sorry you're going through it.

For what it's worth, IMO "Night night mum, I love you" is one of the better last phrases to say to someone.
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#29159 User is offline   worry 

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Posted 14 November 2022 - 08:15 PM

Maximum love, QT.
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#29160 User is offline   Slow Ben 

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Posted 14 November 2022 - 08:30 PM

That really sucks QT.

And there’s nothing wrong with letting yourself be broken for a bit after this. It’s your mom, man.
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