[Raymond Luxury Yacht]

Bhurnae, on Jul 27 2009, 01:52 AM, said:

finally got a couple of days off and rain is pissing down..................all the things I had planned to do involved outsidedness...gggrrrr

Days off are for being lazy. Rain makes this even mroe fun. Just sit on the couch and enjoy doing nothing.

[caladanbrood]

Raymond Luxury Yacht, on Jul 27 2009, 07:42 AM, said:

My groove? Women are...mentally unpredictable. I guess that's not even fair. I can't say that about all women. Just one in particular. And she's freaking me out.

I have a similar problem. Well, I dunno if it's similar, but the bloody woman needs to get a sodding grip on herself and stop messing me around

[Tremolo]

Feckin birds...

[Raymond Luxury Yacht]

I hate applying for education jobs. They are so much more a pan in the ass than regular jobs. Here's one little part of an application I have to do for a job I have no chance of getting anyways:

Please respond to the following three statements. Your responses (in total) should not exceed the length of two typed pages.

1. Please describe how you will contribute to the School District's goal to "Successfully prepare all students for their future."
2. How do you embrace inclusion in the workplace/classroom as it relates to diversity and its benefits thereby enhancing the learning and work environment?
3. Describe your knowledge and experience using technology in the workplace/classroom, including programs in the Microsoft Suite (Word, Excel, etc.).

Sigh. Earlier they sated that this job application should take a minimum of one hour to fill out, not including this writing section. What ever happened to sending in a resume and cover letter, and if they like that filling out more info?

[Cougar]

Raymond Luxury Yacht, on Jul 27 2009, 10:14 PM, said:

1. Please describe how you will contribute to the School District's goal to "Successfully prepare all students for their future."

I will teach them how to hunt and kill a man with their bare hands, how to get into a dodge charger through the window and quantum mechanics with general relativity as they pertain to string theory.

2. How do you embrace inclusion in the workplace/classroom as it relates to diversity and its benefits thereby enhancing the learning and work environment?

I have made a commitment to treating all children equally by burning out my eyes.

3. Describe your knowledge and experience using technology in the workplace/classroom, including programs in the Microsoft Suite (Word, Excel, etc.).

In 1986 I once played Beach Head on a ZX Spectrum until I hallucinated.

[amphibian]

Cougar, on Jul 27 2009, 05:25 PM, said:

Raymond Luxury Yacht, on Jul 27 2009, 10:14 PM, said:

1. Please describe how you will contribute to the School District's goal to "Successfully prepare all students for their future."

I will teach them how to hunt and kill a man with their bare hands, how to get into a dodge charger through the window and quantum mechanics with general relativity as they pertain to string theory.

2. How do you embrace inclusion in the workplace/classroom as it relates to diversity and its benefits thereby enhancing the learning and work environment?

I have made a commitment to treating all children equally by burning out my eyes.

3. Describe your knowledge and experience using technology in the workplace/classroom, including programs in the Microsoft Suite (Word, Excel, etc.).

In 1986 I once played Beach Head on a ZX Spectrum until I hallucinated.

The correct answer to all of these is "I have a brick and I know how to use it."

Brick to the face of troublemakers and underachievers, brick to the car window, brick to the egghead, brick through the computer screen when Microsoft screws up etc. Clobber everything in sight with that brick!

[Raymond Luxury Yacht]

Another pain in the ass about this process? Just to have a valid application, I have to send out 2 confidential reference forms. This means that my references have to fil out and send it a form FOR EVERY JOB I APPLY FOR! I hope I get one of the social work jobs I'm applying for, I want out of education.

[Shiara]

So yeah, we had this training thing this morning? For Outlook? And they needed an email account to use as an example, and the training ones weren’t working on the laptop we had. So I said they could use mine – nothing incriminating in there, right? All work stuff, barring the personal emails that get neatly filed away out of sight.

Only Outlook opened my personal email account, the one that has been forwarded to my PA account, didn't have a filter for personal emails, and hasn’t actually received anything new for a year. Oh well, that’s okay – sure, it shows mostly emails dated from August 2008, a LOT from Centz, but it looks like we were just discussing dinner plans, so no problem there either.

Quickly had to duck out to answer the phone. When I came back, the trainer was demonstrating something using a random email from the inbox – one that mentioned my burlesque lessons O_o

Instant flaming embarrassment – this training session is packed with Branch Library Managers, Associate Directors and the Director herself. And now all of them think I’m a stripper. AWESOME. :Surprise:

[Centzon Totochtin]

Wow shiara O_O That sucks! Hopefully they realise burlesque isn't just stripping

I can't feel half of my mouth right now, I keep trying to smile and the right hand side of my mouth is all droopy. Stupid dentist

[Shiara]

To be fair, as far as I know only one of them noticed - one of the Associate Directors, my supervisor - and she seemed more amused than anything else. Though for some reason she seemed to think I had been pole-dancing - burlesque doesn't necessarily include pole-dancing!

EDIT: @ Centz - you're still on holiday, you don't get to complain!

This post has been edited by Shiara: 28 July 2009 - 03:24 AM

[Shiara]

Okay, the other admin person in our office has resigned as of this morning. Am I ever going to be able to take a freaking holiday?!?

[Raymond Luxury Yacht]

Shiara, on Jul 27 2009, 10:03 PM, said:

Okay, the other admin person in our office has resigned as of this morning. Am I ever going to be able to take a freaking holiday?!?

Get me a job there, then you'll get some time off.

[Shiara]

Raymond Luxury Yacht, on Jul 28 2009, 03:07 PM, said:

Shiara, on Jul 27 2009, 10:03 PM, said:

Okay, the other admin person in our office has resigned as of this morning. Am I ever going to be able to take a freaking holiday?!?

Get me a job there, then you'll get some time off.

You okay with moving to Australia?

[Raymond Luxury Yacht]

Shiara, on Jul 27 2009, 10:20 PM, said:

Raymond Luxury Yacht, on Jul 28 2009, 03:07 PM, said:

Shiara, on Jul 27 2009, 10:03 PM, said:

Okay, the other admin person in our office has resigned as of this morning. Am I ever going to be able to take a freaking holiday?!?

Get me a job there, then you'll get some time off.

You okay with moving to Australia?

Moving expenses covered? Sure. Just have to clear it with the wife. I'm sure that conversation would go well.

[Shiara]

Raymond Luxury Yacht, on Jul 28 2009, 03:31 PM, said:

Moving expenses covered? Sure. Just have to clear it with the wife. I'm sure that conversation would go well.

Sorry, no expenses covered - I'm not rolling in cashes right now

This post has been edited by Shiara: 28 July 2009 - 05:51 AM

[Tremolo]

@Shiara: Never volunteer your e-mail account to anything!

Centzon Totochtin, on Jul 28 2009, 05:05 AM, said:

Wow shiara O_O That sucks! Hopefully they realise burlesque isn't just stripping

I can't feel half of my mouth right now, I keep trying to smile and the right hand side of my mouth is all droopy. Stupid dentist

Hmmm, as part of a festival burlesque was introduced to me. Admittedly I don't have much experience with strip tease but they both seem to involve taking your clothes off while dancing to music, right? And we, the audience, were even asked to howl and whistle whenever the girl took off a piece of clothing. What exactly makes burlesqu different than strip tease?

Oh, and I am way behind on my to-do-list. I have been sooooooooooooo lazy...bites me in the ass now.

[Bhurnae]

Shiara, on Jul 28 2009, 02:23 AM, said:

Quickly had to duck out to answer the phone. When I came back, the trainer was demonstrating something using a random email from the inbox – one that mentioned my burlesque lessons O_o

Instant flaming embarrassment – this training session is packed with Branch Library Managers, Associate Directors and the Director herself. And now all of them think I’m a stripper. AWESOME. :Surprise:

Where the hell is that rep button...................Red, I want all my colleagues to think I'm a stripper

[Loki]

QP F***ING 9'S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Traveller]

amphibian, on Jul 27 2009, 10:37 PM, said:

The correct answer to all of these is "I have a brick and I know how to use it."

Brick to the face of troublemakers and underachievers, brick to the car window, brick to the egghead, brick through the computer screen when Microsoft screws up etc. Clobber everything in sight with that brick!

'I love my Brick..'

Centzon Totochtin, on Jul 28 2009, 04:05 AM, said:

Wow shiara O_O That sucks! Hopefully they realise burlesque isn't just stripping

I can't feel half of my mouth right now, I keep trying to smile and the right hand side of my mouth is all droopy. Stupid dentist

Wow, you weren't wrong about having a lot of people in there..

[Tapper]

I'm currently typing a manual for our new MS CRM system. Mindshatteringly dumb as I have to describe in full detail every possible option as if my co-workers were mentally disturbed. To quote from my own work:

The cursor is now positioned in the First Name field. Enter a name (or leave the field blank if you don't know the contacts first name), then press Tab.

The cursor is now positioned in the Initials field......