[Illuyankas]

Of course, there's nothing to say that you can't neg rep non-pic thread posts, moo hoo ha ha.

[Silencer]

Raymond Luxury Yacht, on 03 February 2013 - 07:21 PM, said:

So people are being banned because they gave an admin an imaginary negative Internet point? I hate the Internet sometimes.

'Course not. They're being banned because I clearly spelled out that this is what would happen if they neg-repped administrative posts and they did so anyway. Completely different if I'd just posted in there normally without a pic.

Illuyankas, on 03 February 2013 - 08:30 PM, said:

Of course, there's nothing to say that you can't neg rep non-pic thread posts, moo hoo ha ha.

It might pay to get a bit more creative with the rep message than "Non-pic thread neg rep loophole!", though, don't ya think? >.>

[High House Dark]

I live at home, my father is sexist/racist/homophobic, and I've been in my room with the door locked consuming my wonderful bottle of Bailey's at a surprisingly fast rate. I'd say I've finished half the bottle in the past hour or so. Kinda gross, but didn't really like my other choices. On the other hand, I am 22, so it is DEFINITELY time to move out, just was kind of hoping to save up a bit more and have a bit more time before I got this fed up (and, oh I dont know, an actual real job, not temping shit).

But when your father yells at you about how nice he is after you calmly pointed out something pretty normal, AND this is the guy who consistently blames your depression/anxiety on "being a drama queen" and who doesn't know your sexuality because you'd never want to tell him and who tried to justify blackfacing because "it's comedy", it's really hard to believe how nice he is. I also wish I could literally leave tomorrow morning, but I'm still employed by local area places and I guess having an asshole for a father isn't an excuse for not giving 2 weeks notice. I also can't afford to live where my parents live (not even in this state cuz taxes are absurdly high here), so I actually need to leave the entire state, not just m parents' place.

Wow, that's al ot to post in this thread. Ok. Well. I guess ranting about it to two of my friends isnt enough?

[Lucifer's Heaven]

High House Dark, on 03 February 2013 - 04:03 AM, said:

I'm only 4'11", I'm too fucking short for this shit.

Hehehe, you're the same height as one of my best friends

High House Dark, on 04 February 2013 - 03:27 AM, said:

Wow, that's al ot to post in this thread. Ok. Well. I guess ranting about it to two of my friends isnt enough?

Rant away! It's pretty much what this thread is for.
Good luck As someone who moved interstate to get a break from some of my family, I wish you the best. Also, I hope you find some cool people to live with

[worry]

Yah that sucks. Some people you're never gonna convince, and you gotta learn to give up (at least for now) trying to convince them of anything. It being family + living with them makes it even that much harder, I know, so I agree you probably gotta get out of there sooner rather than later. But in the meantime you gotta get. that. dirt off your shoulder. I'm not even saying "agree to disagree" or respect his point of view, more like dismiss him outright. Be content in your rightness without giving in to that urge to engage him.

[Assail]

I've come to the conclusion that this is all Silencer's way of coping with the fact that he is from New Zealand, and may be more closely related to sheep than he would like to admit.

You guys need to show more compassion and in the mean time we will mourn the loss of courageous Apt and Satan.

[High House Dark]

worrywort, on 04 February 2013 - 04:10 AM, said:

Yah that sucks. Some people you're never gonna convince, and you gotta learn to give up (at least for now) trying to convince them of anything. It being family + living with them makes it even that much harder, I know, so I agree you probably gotta get out of there sooner rather than later. But in the meantime you gotta get. that. dirt off your shoulder. I'm not even saying "agree to disagree" or respect his point of view, more like dismiss him outright. Be content in your rightness without giving in to that urge to engage him.

You're totally right. I know it's one thing when someone says something asshole-ish but it's on a topic that doesn't personally affect you...
... and then another when it's your own father criticizing something that is deeply personal to you? Like him being a straight guy, and me being a queer woman makes it really hard to try not to convince him of what just seems right.

But even with that, you're still completely on the mark, I just really need to STOP ENGAGING HIM. Just stay quiet, and lay low. ARGH.

[worry]

As you know, it doesn't just "seem" right -- you are right, as a matter of fact, and that makes it even more frustrating. Which is why I bypass the "agree to disagree" option. Not to get too self-help book-y, but I'm just saying this man (regardless of all the personal stuff between you guys that only you know, and only you can set value to, and I wouldn't want to presume anything about) doesn't own your happiness. So if you look at it in terms of personal health and contentedness, an inward thing, as opposed to feeling a responsibility (to yourself? to the world? to him?) to battle his ignorance, then hopefully it's a monkey off your back. Or maybe I'm just lazier than you, I dunno. With these types in my own extended family (especially older generations), I know there's no battle to be won there, so at worst I'm just kinda sad that they have so limited their arenas for potential happiness.

Somewhat related, here's a good recent essay on how one can understand the context of privilege and its associated ignorance and anger -- you can understand it -- but you don't have to grant it a false equivalence to your correct position. I'd recommend it to everyone, not just you, cuz it's a good read IMO (and not too long): http://weeklysift.co...the-privileged/

[Raymond Luxury Yacht]

So how long are they banned for Silencer?

[Tehol the Only]

I'd like to buy A Memory of light, but Orbit only published the hardback version and i own the rest of the series in paperback(i'm a big fan of simmetry). WHY ORBIT? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?

[Silencer]

Raymond Luxury Yacht, on 04 February 2013 - 05:43 AM, said:

So how long are they banned for Silencer?

Well, that will really depend. I DID say "indefinite", after all.

But for the moment Apt has I think two more days on his ban (or less) and Satan has about three or four days. I gave Satan a longer suspension for being dumb enough to emulate Apt, fyi.

Then we'll revisit matters.

[Ain't_It_Just_]

High House Dark, on 04 February 2013 - 03:27 AM, said:

I live at home, my father is sexist/racist/homophobic, and I've been in my room with the door locked consuming my wonderful bottle of Bailey's at a surprisingly fast rate. I'd say I've finished half the bottle in the past hour or so. Kinda gross, but didn't really like my other choices. On the other hand, I am 22, so it is DEFINITELY time to move out, just was kind of hoping to save up a bit more and have a bit more time before I got this fed up (and, oh I dont know, an actual real job, not temping shit).

But when your father yells at you about how nice he is after you calmly pointed out something pretty normal, AND this is the guy who consistently blames your depression/anxiety on "being a drama queen" and who doesn't know your sexuality because you'd never want to tell him and who tried to justify blackfacing because "it's comedy", it's really hard to believe how nice he is. I also wish I could literally leave tomorrow morning, but I'm still employed by local area places and I guess having an asshole for a father isn't an excuse for not giving 2 weeks notice. I also can't afford to live where my parents live (not even in this state cuz taxes are absurdly high here), so I actually need to leave the entire state, not just m parents' place.

Wow, that's al ot to post in this thread. Ok. Well. I guess ranting about it to two of my friends isnt enough?

That's a shit situation, man Hope it works out soon and you can get away. My dad's being an asshole too, not as bad as yours, but I sympathise and empathise a lot more right now.

[QuickTidal]

My sister and her family (my two nieces included sadly) went on a diet rampage about two years ago (stemming from marital issues apparently) and both went out of their way to eat grass or something only...they literally shunned everything (including dairy, which they adore to tell me is horrible for you) and over time they (of course) lost scads of weight. It was unsurprising simply by nature of their caloric intake being WAY less. Well then my sister got her hands on this book called WHEAT BELLY...which has this Doctor eschewing eating wheat because he says (unproven scientifically) it's been genetically modified since the 1980's and is terribly bad for you, that you don't need it in your diet, and that by cutting it out you will lose weight, and alleviate multiple health ailments. He makes some decent points as we should not overdo our wheat intake...and eating meats, veggies, fruits, nuts ect. is obviously better for overall diet...but the argument is that cutting them out completely helps you no more or less than cutting out another entire food group would.

Anyways, long story short, my sister literally lectures me every time she sees me about it...and the rest of the family too. My 17-year old niece told me "rice is like little pellets of sugar" and she "wouldn't put that into her body". Attempting to tell her that entire continents in Asia have had rice as a staple of their diets for thousands of years...and that it's quite nutritious and unmodified...fell on deaf ears.

My 6-year old niece got in trouble at school for attempting to tell the nutritionist who came to speak to their class that what she was talking about was not good for them...FFS!

I'm boggled. My sister and her family have fallen for the latest "war on *insert vilified food here*" and instead of the age-old "eat less and exercise more" they are espousing this garbage that wheat is some kind of enemy because it's been changed over the years at the cellular level and therefore is horribly bad for us. Being a crop we didn't always grow and eat (prior to probably a few thousand years ago), wheat consumption isn't required...but I also don't feel it's a villain either.

I guess it upsets me because my sister, especially in the case of this book with its untested, unscientifically studied "blanket statements", has bought into something without researching it fully. And it's bad enough that they think to tell a nutritionist (a person who spent years in school learning the ins and outs of nutrition) their job and that they are wrong...on the word of a doctor hawking books and cookbooks.

I thought she was smarter than that to be honest. Arguing with her about it is stupid, for last night...at the dinner for my friggin BIRTHDAY...I got lectured once again (at the dinner table and in front of everyone), and the only reason she stopped lecturing me is that my brother in law told her "now was not the time"....but she would have been happy to go on and on.

It's, therefore, messing with my groove heavily. I just WISH she'd do a little research, or at the very least CHALLENGE the author to back up his statements with something more concrete than "wheat looks different now" and "look at these people who have had successful effects from dropping wheat!"

Sigh.

[Abyss]

Tell her that because of her you're eating MORE wheat to restore balance to the universe.
Then watch her head 'splode.

[QuickTidal]

Frealz.

She apparently tried to get my mum to read it and stop eating everything now....and I luckily got off the phone with her and told her to at least read the book with an open mind that the guy doesn't back his shit up with science and she thanked me as she might not have thought about it that way...especially with my mum have had all those recent stomach problems I DON'T want her effing with her diet to that level...I'd rather she's just more nutritious and eats more veggies and fruits.

[D'rek]

Silencer, on 04 February 2013 - 11:35 AM, said:

Raymond Luxury Yacht, on 04 February 2013 - 05:43 AM, said:

So how long are they banned for Silencer?

Well, that will really depend. I DID say "indefinite", after all.

But for the moment Apt has I think two more days on his ban (or less) and Satan has about three or four days. I gave Satan a longer suspension for being dumb enough to emulate Apt, fyi.

Then we'll revisit matters.

You could always let them back in after their bans expire but set their avatars and display names to something of your choosing, then lock them out of editing it

[amphibian]

QuickTidal, on 04 February 2013 - 04:04 PM, said:

Frealz.

She apparently tried to get my mum to read it and stop eating everything now....and I luckily got off the phone with her and told her to at least read the book with an open mind that the guy doesn't back his shit up with science and she thanked me as she might not have thought about it that way...especially with my mum have had all those recent stomach problems I DON'T want her effing with her diet to that level...I'd rather she's just more nutritious and eats more veggies and fruits.

A friend of mine writes on nutrition and the weirdness involving diets like this, particularly how people buy into certain systems so hard that they become annoying evangelists for it.

http://dyenutrition....s-of-exclusion/

It's pretty short, entertaining and could help you deal with your family a bit better too.

This post has been edited by amphibian: 04 February 2013 - 06:44 PM

[QuickTidal]

Thanks Amph! Much obliged sir.

[Mezla PigDog]

QT - If you really want to wind her up you may also wish to look into stats that claim young girls following fad diets or cutting out entire food groups is linked to an increased chance of developing eating disorders in adolescence

[QuickTidal]

Mezla PigDog, on 04 February 2013 - 08:49 PM, said:

QT - If you really want to wind her up you may also wish to look into stats that claim young girls following fad diets or cutting out entire food groups is linked to an increased chance of developing eating disorders in adolescence

Indeed! Which is part of what REALLY worries me about my 17-year old niece who is rail thin...thankfully she's away from my sisters influence in 3 semesters time as she is going to the east coast for school and if there is one thing I've learned it's that eating habits in Uni are not conducive to the type of "paleo" eating her parents currently do. So I'm hoping she'll normalize there.