Malazan Empire: Political Comedy starring world leaders and local idiots - Malazan Empire

Jump to content

  • 91 Pages +
  • « First
  • 27
  • 28
  • 29
  • 30
  • 31
  • Last »
  • You cannot start a new topic
  • This topic is locked

Political Comedy starring world leaders and local idiots Laugh while you cry

#561 User is offline   Tiste Simeon 

  • Faith, Heavy Metal & Bacon
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 11,955
  • Joined: 08-October 04
  • Location:T'North

Posted 11 February 2020 - 10:57 PM

View PostAzath Vitr (D, on 11 February 2020 - 06:06 PM, said:

'Popular Christian activist Dave Daubenmire claims Meghan Markle "poisoned" the royal bloodline by being half-black.

[...] "Don't miss what's going on. This infiltrator comes in, proud of her infiltration, proud of her multiculturalism. And what is that demon doing? Destroying and upsetting everything, every tradition in that royal family."

Previously Daubenmire argued that interracial marriage and multiculturalism is "spiritual AIDS" infecting a once "great Christian American culture" [he is from Ohio]'

https://www.patheos....5TVkVrfxdMCzn_c

'Dave Daubenmire Hopes to Sue the NFL for Putting His Eternal Salvation at Risk With the Super Bowl Halftime Show

"Could I go into a courtroom and say, 'Viewing what you put on that screen put me in danger of hellfire'? Could the court say, 'That doesn't apply here because the right to [produce] porn overrides your right to [not] watch it'? Yeah, well, you didn't tell me I was gonna watch it! You just brought it into my living room. You didn't tell me there were gonna be crotch shots!"

[Previous recent Superbowls also featured 'crotch shots'... but of white women.]

[...] "That's discriminatory against the value I have in my house. You can't just do that," he argued. "I wanna sue them for about $867 trillion."

Daubenmire appears to be quite serious, as he posted a follow-up video on Facebook saying that he is looking for a lawyer who will file a class action lawsuit against Pepsi, the NFL, and his local cable company on his behalf.'

https://www.rightwin...-halftime-show/

'[Daubenmire's] son [...] was placed on a 5-year probation sentence after he was found in possession of child pornography'

'supported [...] Roy Moore who was accusd of sexual misconduct with minors'

'he worked as a high school football coach [...] he was reported to be making his players pray[...] as part of their practice routines. The ACLU sued him for trying to enforce his belief system on his players.'

'Dave is also the Minutemen United National Director.'

https://www.marathi....ave-daubenmire/

Posted Image


'Dave Daubenmire: I Went to a Zoo and Saw How Interracial Marriage Is Wrong'

https://friendlyathe...riage-is-wrong/

This man is not a Christian. I mean if looking at Shakira means your salvation is at risk you were never saved because there is no faith there.
A Haunting Poem
I Scream
You Scream
We all Scream
For I Scream.
0

#562 User is offline   Malankazooie 

  • Elder God
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 6,693
  • Joined: 21-June 16

Posted 12 February 2020 - 05:00 AM

Posted Image

<><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><>
Posted Image

Posted Image

Posted Image
0

#563 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

  • Ascendant
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 3,027
  • Joined: 07-February 16

Posted 13 February 2020 - 02:35 AM

'When Reince Priebus was the White House chief of staff, President Donald Trump repeatedly asked him whether badgers, the state animal of Priebus' home state of Wisconsin, are "mean to people," how they "work," and how aggressive they can get.

[...] During that time, Trump would often "waste Priebus's time" during briefings about foreign and domestic policy by pelting him with questions about badgers'

He would... badger him... about badgers....

'"After Trump was reminded that the short-legged omnivore was practically synonymous with the Badger State, he'd make a point of bringing it up at seemingly random occasions to his beleaguered chief of staff.

[...] "Or are they friendly creatures?" The president would also ask if Priebus had any photos of badgers he could show him[...]

"He wanted Reince — resident White House badger historian, apparently — to explain to him Wisconsin"s obsession with the animal, how the little critters function and behave, what kind of food they like, and how aggressive or deadly they could be when presented with perceived existential threats.

Trump also wanted to know if the badger had a 'personality" or if it was boring. What kind of damage could a badger to do a person with its flashy, sharp claws?"'

https://www.business...29-VFZ2ktobircg

The article fails to mention one possibly critical bit of context: Steve Bannon's nickname is 'honeybadger'---because:



https://nymag.com/in...r-campaign.html


'Trump rally crowd chants "lock her up" at Nancy Pelosi"

"President Trump at a Monday night rally claimed House Speaker Nancy Pelosi was "mumbling terribly" behind him at last week's State of the Union address — leading the New Hampshire crowd to chant "lock her up."

"That was very distracting," the president told his supporters at the SNHU Arena in Manchester of Pelosi's supposed interruption from the House chambers' dais.

"I'm speaking and a woman is mumbling terribly behind me. Angry, there was a little anger back there," the president said. "We're the ones who should be angry."

Trump's remarks ignited the "lock her up" chant that became a popular rally cry four years ago whenever the president mentioned his 2016 Democratic challenger, former secretary of state Hillary Clinton.'

https://nypost.com/2...t-nancy-pelosi/


'Republicans want tampons to keep being taxed to limit women from buying too many

Republican lawmakers in Tennessee are raising objections to a proposal that would add feminine hygiene products to the list of items that can be purchased during the state's annual sales-tax holiday[...]

the GOP lawmakers worried that women would abuse the law and purchase too many feminine hygiene products during the pause on state sales tax on some items — including computers and clothing. The pause lasts only one weekend[...] "I would think since it's a sales tax holiday, there's really no limit on the number of items anybody can purchase," Republican state Sen. Joey Hensley said during a debate on the proposal on Tuesday, according to the AP. "I don't know how you would limit the number of items someone could purchase."

Advocates argue that feminine hygiene products are a basic necessity that should be added to a list of necessities that aren't subject to taxes, such as groceries and medicine.'

https://www.sourcepo...uying-too-many/


'Rush Limbaugh: "Mr. Man" Trump Will "Have Fun" With "Gay Guy" Buttigieg Kissing His Husband

[...] the latest winner of the Medal of Freedom, as bestowed by President Trump.

[...] Buttigieg, which Limbaugh pronounced as "Booty-gieg."

hey need to get a "gay guy kissing his husband on stage" to "ram it down Trump's throat."

"Really," he laughed. "Having fun envisioning that."'

https://www.thedaily...kSpku2a1yn7sElQ


'Ex-Ohio State wrestler claims Jim Jordan called "crying, begging" him to deny abuse allegations

DiSabato said during the House Civil Justice Committee hearing that Jordan, an assistant wrestling coach from 1986-1994, knew about the sexual harassment and abuse that was taking place [...] “Jim Jordan called me crying, groveling, begging me to go against my brother, begging me, crying for a half-hour," he said, according to video of the hearing. "That’s the kind of cover-up that’s going on there." [...] Strauss, who died by suicide in 2005, has been accused of sexually assaulting hundreds of athletes across 15 varsity sports.'

https://thehill.com/...qeLK9iTfFlfhmxg

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 13 February 2020 - 03:12 AM

0

#564 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

  • Ascendant
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 3,027
  • Joined: 07-February 16

Posted 13 February 2020 - 08:23 PM

Trump tweeted:

'Mini Mike Bloomberg is a LOSER [...] He reminds me of a tiny version of Jeb "Low Energy" Bush, but Jeb has more political skill and has treated the Black community much better than Mini!'

https://twitter.com/...943796681400320

'I'm seeing Governor Cuomo today at The White House. He must understand that National Security far exceeds politics. New York must stop all of its unnecessary lawsuits & harrassment, start cleaning itself up, and lowering taxes. Build relationships, but don't bring Fredo!'

https://twitter.com/...023660457480194

'Trump and Bloomberg Both Lose Deeply Embarrassing Twitter Argument

[...] President Donald Trump and 2020 hopeful Michael Bloomberg have spent the morning trading extremely embarrassing and childish barbs on Twitter, with Trump calling Bloomberg short and Bloomberg saying Trump has no friends. Trump began the unedifying spectacle when he wrote: "Mini Mike is a 5'4 mass of dead energy who does not want to be on the debate stage with these professional politicians. No boxes please [..." ...] Twenty minutes of thinking time later, Bloomberg hit back: "We know many of the same people in NY. Behind your back they laugh at you & call you a carnival barking clown. They know you inherited a fortune & squandered it with stupid deals and incompetence. I have the record & the resources to defeat you. And I will." [...] Bloomberg rounded it off 20 minutes later by sending Trump a gif of Russell Crowe in Gladiator.'

https://www.thedaily...gument?ref=home
0

#565 User is offline   Macros 

  • D'ivers Fuckwits
  • Group: High House Mafia
  • Posts: 8,832
  • Joined: 28-January 08
  • Location:Ulster, disputed zone, British Empire.

Posted 13 February 2020 - 08:25 PM

This is politics now.
0

#566 User is offline   Malankazooie 

  • Elder God
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 6,693
  • Joined: 21-June 16

Posted 15 February 2020 - 06:27 PM

Posted Image
0

#567 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

  • Ascendant
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 3,027
  • Joined: 07-February 16

Posted 15 February 2020 - 07:10 PM

Trump tweeted:

'"Ralph Waldo Emerson seemed to foresee the lesson of the Senate Impeachment Trial of President Trump. 'When you strike at the King, Emerson famously said, "you must kill him.' Mr. Trump's foes struck at him but did not take him down. A triumphant Mr.Trump emerges from the.....

.....biggest test of his presidency emboldened, ready to claim exoneration, and take his case of grievance, persecution and resentment to the campaign trail." Peter Baker
@nytimes The Greatest Witch Hunt In American History!'

https://twitter.com/...666350635290624

'"Girls Line Up to Give Him [Oral Sex] as a Present': Bloomberg Lawsuits Unearthed

when told of a male colleague's impending marriage, Bloomberg suggested to female salespeople, "All of you girls line up to give him [oral sex] as a wedding present."'

https://www.thedaily...arthed?ref=home

'Blood-Soaked Mayor Bloomberg Announces Homelessness No Longer A Problem In New York City'

data:image/gif;base64,R0lGODlhAQABAAAAACH5BAEKAAEALAAAAAABAAEAAAICTAEAOw==
Posted Image


https://www.theonion...s-no-1819575714

'Bloomberg Hires Thousands Of Canvassers To Stop Black Men On Street And Force Them To Hear Campaign Pitch'

Posted Image


https://politics.the...ck-m-1841701859

(the last two are satire)

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 15 February 2020 - 07:11 PM

0

#568 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

  • Ascendant
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 3,027
  • Joined: 07-February 16

Posted 15 February 2020 - 09:05 PM

Posted Image
0

#569 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

  • Ascendant
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 3,027
  • Joined: 07-February 16

Posted 17 February 2020 - 07:42 PM

Posted Image


'White: Rachel Maddow is Possessed By At Least 3 Demons

[...] According to Paula White, a leading Trump supporter and fundamentalist preacher, Maddow is possessed by multiple demons.

"It is clear to me, using my spiritual discernment, that Maddow is suffering from possession by multiple demons," said White in an interview on "The 700 Club." "She is infected by a knowledge demon because she seems to have all the answers. She is also possessed by a transgender demon because she dresses like a man, and she is infected by a demon of disrespect because she is so critical of President Trump, who was chosen by God."

White added that Maddow may have other demons, but she could not know until she went through an exorcism.

Evangelical Christians are notoriously hostile to the LGBTQ community. A Christian website recently called for the death of Democratic presidential candidate Pete Buttigieg, who is gay.

According to an article posted on Patheos, Charisma News Bert Farias writer said Buttigieg is "worthy of death."

"In the name of progressivism we now have a male presidential candidate who has a husband whom he publicly introduces and even kisses without shame, while millions of Americans applaud and approve. And perhaps worse yet is that the shock effect has been so reduced that the rest of us are numb and desensitized to this most shameful and abominable behavior," said Farias. "In fact, when those who practice such things that are 'deserving of death' also approve of others who practice them (Rom. 1:32), it is one of God's final signs of His wrath on a society. This is a description of gay activism and constantly pushing for its normalcy and marginalizing those who disapprove. This is present-day America. How far we've fallen!""

https://thebiznews.o...least-3-demons/

In his tweet I mentioned earlier, Trump changed the Emerson quote from 'a king' to 'the King' (to refer to Himself...).
https://slate.com/ne...mself-king.html

'Trump at Daytona 500: Start Your Engines. Mother Nature: Not So Fast.

[...] Trump delivered a pre-race speech alongside first lady Melania Trump and gave the command for drivers to start their engines, but rain interfered. Drivers were called back to their cars around 6:30 p.m., but the event was ultimately postponed by the heaviest downpour of the day.'

https://www.thedaily...arance?ref=home

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 17 February 2020 - 07:44 PM

1

#570 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

  • Ascendant
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 3,027
  • Joined: 07-February 16

Posted 18 February 2020 - 06:53 PM

Trump's Twitter:

'Everything having to do with this fraudulent [Mueller] investigation is...

badly tainted and, in my opinion, should be thrown out. [...] The whole deal was a total SCAM. If I wasn’t President, I’d be suing everyone all over the place...

....BUT MAYBE I STILL WILL. WITCH HUNT!'

https://twitter.com/...756032693473280
0

#571 User is offline   Aptorian 

  • How 'bout a hug?
  • Group: The Wheelchairs of War
  • Posts: 24,778
  • Joined: 22-May 06

Posted 19 February 2020 - 03:50 AM

View PostExcrementEncephalon, on 19 February 2020 - 02:41 AM, said:

Posted Image


The second one is pretty good. The other ones range from sad to offensive assuming somebody actually believes these things.

This actually makes me wonder. Is humor primarily a left wing thing? I never hear about popular right thing late night shows or comedians. Is there a whole segment like this we just don't hear about on the liberal internet?
0

#572 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

  • Ascendant
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 3,027
  • Joined: 07-February 16

Posted 19 February 2020 - 03:55 AM

Trump's Twitter:

'What Mini Mike is doing is nothing less than a large scale illegal campaign contribution. He is "spreading" money all over the place, only to have recipients of his cash payments, many former opponents, happily joining or supporting his campaign. Isn't that called a payoff?...

....Mini is illegally buying the Democrat Nomination. [...] Good luck in the debate tomorrow night and remember, no standing on boxes!'

https://twitter.com/...871176614199296


Posted Image

https://twitter.com/...727068314914816

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 19 February 2020 - 03:56 AM

0

#573 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

  • Ascendant
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 3,027
  • Joined: 07-February 16

Posted 19 February 2020 - 04:00 AM

View PostAptorian, on 19 February 2020 - 03:50 AM, said:

View PostExcrementEncephalon, on 19 February 2020 - 02:41 AM, said:

Posted Image


The second one is pretty good. The other ones range from sad to offensive assuming somebody actually believes these things.

This actually makes me wonder. Is humor primarily a left wing thing? I never hear about popular right thing late night shows or comedians. Is there a whole segment like this we just don't hear about on the liberal internet?


Dennis Miller, Jay Leno, Adam Sandler... that bigot who was fired from SNL before his first show.

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 19 February 2020 - 04:02 AM

0

#574 User is offline   Slow Ben 

  • Ranger
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 4,687
  • Joined: 29-September 08
  • Location:Southern Illinois

Posted 19 February 2020 - 04:20 AM

View PostAptorian, on 19 February 2020 - 03:50 AM, said:

View PostExcrementEncephalon, on 19 February 2020 - 02:41 AM, said:

Posted Image


The second one is pretty good. The other ones range from sad to offensive assuming somebody actually believes these things.

This actually makes me wonder. Is humor primarily a left wing thing? I never hear about popular right thing late night shows or comedians. Is there a whole segment like this we just don't hear about on the liberal internet?


r/therightcantmeme is hilarious.
I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.
0

#575 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

  • Ascendant
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 3,027
  • Joined: 07-February 16

Posted 19 February 2020 - 04:32 AM

'Alexander Stone, the Antichrist in the Omega Code Movies, Flunks the Wokeness Test

The Battle of Megiddo was awful. But to disqualify the former Chancellor of the United World Union from the presidency on that basis is to risk something more destructive: a second term for Trump.

Is the American left about to prioritize virtue signaling over keeping an unqualified monomaniac from a second term as president? That is what would happen if Alexander Stone's failed attempt to create a Satanic New World Order at the Plains of Megiddo is treated as automatically disqualifying him from serious consideration as the Democratic nominee.

As shown in The Omega Code and Megiddo: The Omega Code 2, when Stone was Chancellor of the United World Union, he gathered the military forces of each of the ten democratic zones to a place called in the Hebrew tongue Armageddon, then declared himself "King and God" on the grounds of the newly-rebuilt Third Temple in an attempt to usher in the thousand-year reign of the beast that was, and is not, yet is. This draconian policy brought unforgivable woe to all the inhabitants of the earth and sea, and it has dogged Stone's political career ever since.

[...] Stone, a man of wealth and taste who has seven heads and ten horns, and upon his horns ten crowns, and upon his heads the name of blasphemy, arguably has a better chance of ousting Trump than does Bernie Sanders, a growly 78-year-old human being who can't even be bothered to scrawl "MYSTERY, BABYLON THE GREAT, THE FATHER OF HARLOTS AND THE ABOMINATIONS OF THE EARTH" across his own forehead before appearing at campaign events. If only because Alexander Stone is Lucifer, son of the morning, that made the earth to tremble, that did shake kingdoms, that made the world as a wilderness and destroyed the cities thereof, he could easily outshine Pete Buttigieg, and maybe even Amy Klobuchar. What rationality could there be in allowing grievances over which candidate drank deeply of the wine of the wrath of the fornication of the great whore that sitteth upon many waters to dominate the primaries and ease Donald Trump's quest for a second term? Besides, don't you want to see Trump face off in the debates against someone with real power and money? His head will explode!'

https://slate.com/cu...berg-trump.html

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 19 February 2020 - 04:32 AM

0

#576 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

  • Ascendant
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 3,027
  • Joined: 07-February 16

Posted 19 February 2020 - 06:24 AM

'An Iowa man is accused of holding the worst Black History Month program ever after cops arrested him for kidnapping a white woman and forcing her to watch the "Roots" miniseries so she could "understand her racism."'

https://www.theroot....dKv681txuGHj-ik

'George Zimmerman announces lawsuit against Pete Buttigieg and Elizabeth Warren for $265 million'

Posted Image

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 19 February 2020 - 06:42 AM

0

#577 User is offline   Morgoth 

  • executor emeritus
  • Group: High House Mafia
  • Posts: 11,448
  • Joined: 24-January 03
  • Location:the void

Posted 19 February 2020 - 09:14 AM

What exactly does Trump make happen? I mean, if you ignore his twitter and look at what's actually been done. A lot of judges being appointed, which is great if you're anti abortion I suppose. Then there's the massive debt growth and... ?
Take good care to keep relations civil
It's decent in the first of gentlemen
To speak friendly, Even to the devil
0

#578 User is offline   Gorefest 

  • Witness
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 2,974
  • Joined: 29-May 14
  • Location:Sheffield

Posted 19 February 2020 - 09:30 AM

He is lifting the long prevailing stigma on the repressed white male racist Americans and finally allows them a voice again.
Yesterday, upon the stair, I saw a man who wasn't there. He wasn't there again today. Oh, how I wish he'd go away.
0

#579 User is offline   Azath Vitr (D'ivers 

  • Ascendant
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 3,027
  • Joined: 07-February 16

Posted 19 February 2020 - 03:34 PM

'"Bloomberg Told 'Nice Person' Trump: 'Donald, I Do Love You'

[...] A resurfaced clip reported by Politico shows Bloomberg speaking at Oxford University shortly after the 2016 election. He told the crowd about a chat he had with Trump after a 9/11 memorial service that year, when Trump told Bloomberg he saw his critical speech about him at the Democratic National Convention. In Bloomberg's retelling, Trump said to him: "But you really do love me, don't ya?" Bloomberg went on: "And I said, 'Yes, Donald, I do love you, I just disagree with everything you've ever said.' And we had a good laugh... If you've sat and had dinner with Donald Trump, you'd probably walk away saying everything he just said is bullshit, he can't be doing that. But you have a good time. He is socially a nice person.'

https://www.thedaily...ve-you?ref=home

Nice in that Bloomberg-ian 'why don't you line up to give him blowjobs for his birthday, my employees' sense?

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 19 February 2020 - 03:34 PM

0

#580 User is offline   Malankazooie 

  • Elder God
  • Group: Malaz Regular
  • Posts: 6,693
  • Joined: 21-June 16

Posted 20 February 2020 - 12:09 AM

Posted Image
0

Share this topic:


  • 91 Pages +
  • « First
  • 27
  • 28
  • 29
  • 30
  • 31
  • Last »
  • You cannot start a new topic
  • This topic is locked

2 User(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 2 guests, 0 anonymous users