Malazan Empire: The Great Debate - Malazan Empire

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The Great Debate A discussion that may tear the forum apart

Poll: The Great Debate (129 member(s) have cast votes)

Which way should the paper roll face

A. The paper is pulled under and down along the wall. (20 votes [15.50%])
Percentage of vote: 15.50%
B. The paper is pulled over and out towards the user. (99 votes [76.74%])
Percentage of vote: 76.74%
C. Others (4 votes [3.10%])
Percentage of vote: 3.10%
D. I am Dolorous Menhir and I whipe my ass with hundred dollar bills (6 votes [4.65%])
Percentage of vote: 4.65%

Bonus question, do you "scrunge up" the paper or do you fold it?

Scrunge (28 votes [23.33%])
Percentage of vote: 23.33%
Fold (90 votes [75.00%])
Percentage of vote: 75.00%
Diaper (2 votes [1.67%])
Percentage of vote: 1.67%

Vote Guests cannot vote

#81 Macros

D'ivers Fuckwits

Group: High House Mafia
Posts: 9,271
Joined: 28-January 08
Location:Ulster, disputed zone, British Empire.

Posted 06 June 2011 - 02:43 PM

I know a standuptowiper
Strange guy.

On a more important note, after one of my hand damaging accidents I was forced to wipe with the other hand, a very peculiar experience

2012
"Imperial Gothos, Imperial"

#82 King Bear

Furry

Group: Team Quick Ben
Posts: 798
Joined: 08-February 11

Posted 06 June 2011 - 02:49 PM

Macros, on 06 June 2011 - 02:43 PM, said:

On a more important note, after one of my hand damaging accidents I was forced to wipe with the other hand, a very peculiar experience

Is it like someone else is doing it for you?

#83 Use Of Weapons

Soletaken

Group: Malaz Regular
Posts: 2,237
Joined: 06-May 03
Location:Manchester, UK
Interests:Writing. Martial arts. Sport. Music, playing and singing, composition.

Posted 06 June 2011 - 03:34 PM

I wipe while standing. I refuse to admit that that makes me peculiar.

It is perfectly monstrous the way people go about nowadays saying things against one, behind one's back, that are absolutely and entirely true.
-- Oscar Wilde

#84 Slow Ben

Ranger

Group: Malaz Regular
Posts: 4,838
Joined: 29-September 08
Location:Southern Illinois

Posted 06 June 2011 - 03:53 PM

I had a friend in high school who said he wiped from the front.

Thats just fucking weird.

I've always been crazy but its kept me from going insane.

#85 Adjutant Stormy~

Captain, Team Quick Ben

Group: Team Quick Ben
Posts: 1,344
Joined: 24-January 08

Posted 06 June 2011 - 08:26 PM

jitsukerr, on 06 June 2011 - 03:34 PM, said:

I wipe while standing. I refuse to admit that that makes me peculiar.

It does, and you're a savage for doing it.

Slow Ben, on 06 June 2011 - 03:53 PM, said:

I had a friend in high school who said he wiped from the front.

Thats just fucking weird.

Equally barbaric.

<div class='quotetop'>QUOTE (Aptorian @ Nov 1 2008, 06:13 PM) <a href="index.php?act=findpost&pid=462161"><{POST_SNAPBACK}></a></div><div class='quotemain'>God damn. Mighty drunk. Must ... what is the english movement movement movement for drunk... with out you seemimg drunk?

bla bla bla

Peopleare harrasing me... grrrrrh.

Also people with big noses aren't jews, they're just french

EDIT: We has editted so mucj that5 we're not quite sure... also, leave britney alone.</div>

#86 Illuyankas

Retro Classic

Group: The Hateocracy of Truth
Posts: 7,254
Joined: 28-September 04
Will cluck you up

Posted 06 June 2011 - 08:56 PM

So how do you wipe when not standing? Do you reach into the bowl, or do you lean to one side? Do perhaps lean really far forward, whilst looking even sillier than a standing gentleman?

Also I assume 'from the front' means 'lean forward and reach between your legs to wipe' not 'wipe from front to back in a direction away from the general direction of your genitalia' because otherwise what.

(the fact that everyone has their own mental image of what to do that varies from person to person and trying to get everyone's descriptions to match their own despite it being a fool's errand is pretty funny)

This post has been edited by Illuyankas: 06 June 2011 - 08:57 PM

Hello, soldiers, look at your mage, now back to me, now back at your mage, now back to me. Sadly, he isn’t me, but if he stopped being an unascended mortal and switched to Sole Spice, he could smell like he’s me. Look down, back up, where are you? You’re in a warren with the High Mage your cadre mage could smell like. What’s in your hand, back at me. I have it, it’s an acorn with two gates to that realm you love. Look again, the acorn is now otataral. Anything is possible when your mage smells like Sole Spice and not a Bole brother. I’m on a quorl.

#87 Coco with marshmallows

DIIIIIIIIIIVVVEEEEE

Group: LHTEC
Posts: 2,115
Joined: 26-October 05

Posted 06 June 2011 - 08:59 PM

Macros, on 06 June 2011 - 02:43 PM, said:

On a more important note, after one of my hand damaging accidents I was forced to wipe with the other hand

Why didn't you just use toilet paper?...... -_-

meh. Link was dead :(

#88 Kanese S's

TMI Frigate Bird of Low House PEN

Group: Mott Irregulars
Posts: 1,947
Joined: 26-April 11

Posted 06 June 2011 - 09:32 PM

Illuyankas, on 06 June 2011 - 08:56 PM, said:

So how do you wipe when not standing? Do you reach into the bowl, or do you lean to one side? Do perhaps lean really far forward, whilst looking even sillier than a standing gentleman?

Usually the first. After scooting forward slightly so I can lean back. Then I wipe, with my neatly folded toilet paper. And repeat as necessary. Unless a bidet is available, in which case I use that.

This entire topic is pretty TMI. It's very amusing.

Laseen did nothing wrong.

I demand Telorast & Curdle plushies.

#89 Macros

D'ivers Fuckwits

Group: High House Mafia
Posts: 9,271
Joined: 28-January 08
Location:Ulster, disputed zone, British Empire.

Posted 07 June 2011 - 09:32 AM

I know another guy who wipes from the front, an equally strange boy.
Standard procedure is lean to left, wipe with right hand (with toilet paper coco)

2012
"Imperial Gothos, Imperial"