[Hal]

Could someone please sum up the HoC for me, its been about a year and my minds a little rusty.

[Hinter]

Karsa Orlong

(now that's a summary )

[wareonia]

Lets see this is what i can remember the Chronological order of the following is as good as SE's.

Karsa killed loads of children, raped a village, got put in chains every time he turned around, Released a FA (calm), killed more children, got put in chains etc.
Then he grew up and went to live in the desert with Leoman and became Sha'ik's (sp?) pet pitbull.

Tavore marches her army to the desert.

everyone in the desert is arguing with each other.

Cutter and Apslar protect the Shadow throne.

Trull and Onarack (sp?) meet up and become best mates 4eva. they release 2 hounds of darkness. Then go and protect the First throne of the T'Lan Imass. (among other things)

Tavore still marching.

People in the desert are still arguing.

Karsa becomes sick of walking everywhere so decides to go and get a pimped up horse along the way he meets Icuarim (i am so crap at spelling names!) who breaks his sword so he knocks him out, releases a Jagut who he shows the business end of his "unbroken wooden sword" (eh, eh nudge is as good as a wink to a blind bat). Karsa then decides another wooden sword wouldn't really go with his new ride so decides to go with the stone look with the help of his gods who turn out to be T'lan Imass just pretending to be gods (tricksy Imass!).

Some scopions have a fight and make loads of money, what scopions need money for is anyones guess.

Tavores army gets to the whirlwind wall which breaks.

Everyone starts killing everyone else in the oasis including ghosts.

Karsa gets back goes on a killing spee killing everyone he meets including the Hounds of darkness.

the whirlwind goddess gets killed by some nu-Talons.

Tavore kills her sister then goes and has a cup of tea.

Oh yeah Heboric becomes the destriant to Trake and the Bridgeburners ascend.


Jesus its almost word perfect to the story (just imagine it 50% better than here)

This post has been edited by wareonia: 18 February 2009 - 12:53 PM

[D'rek]

Good stuff Warenonia, but don't forget that after all that, Trull sits next to a wall and cries whilst starting his autobiography for Onrack (who is pseudo-crying because Dryjhna is now dead), the autobiography being MT.

[Aptorian]

wareonia, on Feb 18 2009, 01:50 PM, said:

Some scopions have a fight and make loads of money, what scopions need money for is anyones guess.

I had a good long chuckle at this

[Abyss]

Apsalar has issues. Volumes, actually.

Tiste Liosan appear and are dicks.

A bull enkaral gets its mind shoved into a formerly demon-possessed pure blood Thelomen Toblakai body, becoming Champion of the Beast Hold and the most awesome character ever to never appear ever again.

Lt. Ranal gets Ranal'd all over the place.

Raraku gets a pool installed.

- Abyss, briefly.

[D'rek]

The most awesometastic character of the entire series, Balgrid, is introduced. He turns into a bale of straw.

Corabb is introduced and has a load of fun adventures exactly like Paran's Oponnic adventures in GotM.

Quick Ben returns from Genebackis and drops a coconut on Kalam's head. He later emerges from said Coconut and they give Korbolo Dom to the Adjunct. Pearl will eventually take Korbolo back to Unta for Laseen.

Iskaral Pust makes a new mule after the death/departure of Rellock. This is Donkeygoth #4

This post has been edited by D'rek: 18 February 2009 - 09:55 PM

[Illuyankas]

D'rek, on Feb 18 2009, 09:53 PM, said:

The most awesometastic character of the entire series

You know it, baby.

D'rek, on Feb 18 2009, 09:53 PM, said:

Balgrid

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT

TORVALD MOTHERFUCKING NOM

[Aptorian]

You know, I was just about to post "in before Illy rant", but then... this.

[D'rek]

Sorry, Illy. Torvald is indeed extremely awesome and most definitely the most badass. But Torvald's extreme Badassery and high awesome level does not outdo the greater awesomeness (but not as badassness) of Balgrid.

[Illuyankas]

We'll find you help one day, D'rek.

You and your strawman. Honestly.

[D'rek]

You just wait until Icarium kills the entire 14th and the world, and only Balgrid is left, and he turns into the mighty Bale of Straw and Iccy stabs into the mighty Bale of Straw but it doesn't do anything! and the frustration causes Iccy to never go crazy again.

Or something.

[wareonia]

Hmm seems i missed a few things.

I'd actually completely forgot about straw man. i've got to say of all the powers witnessed his seems to be the most useful. I mean who would not want to be a bale of hay.

[andols]

torvald sticks around in the series? or is his badassness just from hoc? and the hay stack guy sticks around too?

[D'rek]

andols, on Feb 19 2009, 02:53 PM, said:

torvald sticks around in the series? or is his badassness just from hoc? and the hay stack guy sticks around too?

Spoiler

Torvald's badassness is based entirely on HoC, though that's not to say he might not cameo later, I suppose.

Spoiler

Balgrid returns in later books, and even randomly changes his aspect around to other warrens and styles, with no one remembering he was ever an illusionist. That's just how good of an illusionist he is.

[Abyss]

Illuyankas, on Feb 18 2009, 05:40 PM, said:

D'rek, on Feb 18 2009, 09:53 PM, said:

The most awesometastic character of the entire series

You know it, baby.

D'rek, on Feb 18 2009, 09:53 PM, said:

Balgrid

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT

TORVALD MOTHERFUCKING NOM

You're both wrong. Balgrid wasn't fooling Pearl at all and Nom spends most of the book bleeding, starving or getting sunburn.

Nefarias Bredd wins for mostest awesome character introduced in HoC.


- Abyss, ...could be said to butter up the Bredd...

This post has been edited by Abyss: 19 February 2009 - 10:37 PM

[andols]

when would it be safe to read dreks post?

[D'rek]

andols, on Feb 20 2009, 07:40 AM, said:

when would it be safe to read dreks post?

They're very light spoilers. The first one is more of an affirmation/denial of a previous post.

The second is just commentary on a weird in-consistancy that comes about in a later book. But such a minor character, it's really not much of a spoiler, either.

[Rhand]

Abyss, on Feb 20 2009, 12:35 AM, said:

You're both wrong. Balgrid wasn't fooling Pearl at all and Nom spends most of the book bleeding, starving or getting sunburn.

Nefarias Bredd wins for mostest awesome character introduced in HoC.


- Abyss, ...could be said to butter up the Bredd...

You know, even though I just read HoC I can't place him at all. Who is Nefarias Bredd? Dramatis Personae can't help me so he must be a really minor character.

[MTS]

Nefarias Bredd is a character virtually everyone in the 14th mentions but we never see. Apparently he kills a bhederin, gets down and dirty with a few lasses and kills like 20 people in one battle, along with other stuff I can't remember. He's basically a 14th legend, and the most badass guy ever (yes Illy, even better than Torvald FUCKING Nom). I very much doubt he's real, thus not in the Dramatis Personae.

This post has been edited by Mappo's Travelling Sack: 06 June 2009 - 05:39 PM