Malazan Empire: What's messing with your groove? - Malazan Empire

Cause, on 13 July 2023 - 07:06 AM, said:

You can just crush it... like a bug.

A swift death being more humane than ten seconds of torture. Much easier than trying to capture it alive just to kill it. Though if you really want to experiment on it (and gradually torture it to death---leading up to greater and grander things? y'know women love serial killers!)...

Seriously though, if insects are a possibility---as they are in almost every apartment (unless it's a hermetically sealed chamber and everyone always has all insects (and their eggs) removed from their person (including all orifices) before entering)---obviously you might want to keep dishes, utensils and food behind secure doors such that even tiny insects can't squeeze through the cracks---and not leave them in the sink. In addition to keeping food in its container, I put it in a ziplock slider bag (technically Hefty recently, because they have bigger ones).

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 13 July 2023 - 12:17 PM

Cause, on 13 July 2023 - 01:05 AM, said:

Oh shoot, sorry man, didn't know you were living there right now. To be fair we drove through Pennsylvania mostly, but yeah sorry man.

The most humane thing to do would be to release it inside Mar-a-Lago (or inside Trump...).

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Cause, on 13 July 2023 - 07:06 AM, said:

And you wonder why QT didn't visit you??

Tiste Simeon, on 13 July 2023 - 01:13 PM, said:

'Come use your sword to squish the bugs for me'

When you see one there are usually many more unseen,
Feasting on the dust of your flesh in the shadows you haven't cleaned....

Cockroaches are like humans: difficult to eradicate completely.
But there are methods... you can ask ChatGPT.

Tornados.

In Ottawa.

Azath Vitr (D, on 13 July 2023 - 03:34 PM, said:

This is not funny, I may have to move

Cause, on 14 July 2023 - 12:15 AM, said:

Well if you move to Canada you can visit QT... it's too cold for insects to survive there (except inside the fires... where it's too hot for most insects).

#AllProblemsSolved

Seriously though, I see a cockroach now and then in my apartment; if I can kill it easily I do, but I don't tear my apartment apart chasing after it and its brethren, and it doesn't bother me at all. They don't crawl in bed with me (but it's best not to sleep on the floor). I make sure all my cups have lids, and I wash my hands. My doors and windows seem pretty decently sealed (though I guess they could be squeezing through the door if they're flexible enough despite their size) but bugs have been coming in through the light fixtures....

#SentByTheLight

This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 14 July 2023 - 12:42 AM

Im going on a 9 day vacation to Florida starting tomorrow night. 5 days in Orlando, 4 days 4 parks of Disney world. I have been telling people I want to go to Disney world since I got to America. Now that its happening I find myself feeling... Nothing. I have a lack of excitement for this holiday. A friend won the greencard lottery and I am meeting him. Have not seen him in a year. I cant explain it. Its not that I dont want to go, not that I don't want to see him. I just feel neutral. Im sure I will have a good time when I am there.

I feel some anxiety because I dont like scary thrill rides. I don't want to plumet 50 stories or go loop de loop but I know there is enough to do at diseny world without these things and have already told my friend he will have to do such rides alone. I just cant explain why I am not more excited for this vacation.

I travel a lot for work, but this is only my second vacation in the last three years and I should be excited for it.

_________________________________

In a separate but troubling development for me one of my friends who I used to speak to practically daily has started to take hours to days to respond to my texts. She is notorious for this and when I first met her over a decade ago this was her pattern. She uses her phone regularly, its not that she isnt aware of texts, she just chooses to not respond for whatever reason. I have always found it odd as with the exception of reading a text when Im busy and planning to reply later but forgeting to, not responding to a text has always been foreign to me. However for the last ten years we have honestly probably texted or spoken quite regularly and she would respond to me in what I would just describe as normal texting behavior. I cant nail down exactly when this started changing but the change is obvious. I first asked her if she is okay and more recently called her out on it once already. She acknowledged it and said work was just really busy but the pattern has continued for over a month.

So back in June I asked my dad if he’d go see INDY 5 with me. We had seen THE LAST CRUSDADE together when I was a kid in theatres, and even having two matching decorative plates from that one (my dad has one of Indy & Connery, and I have one with just Indy), so Indy has always been sort of a “thing” for us. We also saw INDY 4 in theatres together. So when I asked him he said “Sure! That sounds great”…and then a few beats later I get another text saying “We will be happy to join you to see it”…so he’s now included my stepmom into the equation.

Now look, am I upset that my stepmom will horn in on my time with my dad seeing a movie series that means a lot to us as father and son, sure. I can’t say that it doesn’t bother me. It absolutely does. But considering her last year of mental health problems and the whole unaliving attempt she made… I understand the eggshells he now walks around her with and trying to include her in nearly everything as he doesn’t want her to get upset and relapse into her depression…so I get it. But I’d be lying if I said I thought 2.5hours of his life seemed like a lot to ask for father son time.

Anyways, since I was going to the States in the end of June when the movie released I said we’d arrange it when I got back and could find time.

So fast forward to last night, and I was going to message them about coming halfway to me and seeing it in a nearby city on Friday afternoon. I did this because I know that A. they don’t like driving at night, so a daytime screening was best, and B. the location means it’s only halfway between us so less driving. He messages me randomly instead about if I thought OPPENHEIMER looked good (I said yep) and then he’s like “If you want to see Indy we should still do that”….so I make my suggestion for this Friday, and he says “I don’t know if it will still be playing Friday, and we don’t want to miss it”….and I was like It’s only been out three weeks, it should still be playing at that multiplex. I tell him the times for said multiplex are not up for Friday yet (they go up Wednesday I think) but I’ll keep an eye out. He says okay. A few beats later I get another text saying that he “googled” and that Indy 5 was not going to be playing at said multiplex on Friday and was going to be “replaced” by OPPENHEIMER…and I mean first of all, your “googling” is not as good as the CINEPLEX site that doesn’t have the listings up yet (just like every other week in...history), and secondly on a big multiplex they aren’t going to use OPPENHEIMER to “replace” Indy, it will play alongside it….in NO universe is Indy 5 running for 3 weeks only in a big multiplex like that. They will milk it for as long as people will buy tix. Instead of calling this all out, I say “Oh, okay”….as I don’t want to rock the boat…then I get another text “We are going to see it on our own on Tuesday in our town as we don’t want to miss it”…to which I reply “Okay” and leave it at that.

Now I’m angry. Like wait till Wednesday and I’ll literally tell you what the screenings are for Friday...but nope…he bailed out….on our father son activity (that he invited my stepmom to)…and the time between texts tells me that it was my stepmom who very likely was the one who said it would leave the theatre and they’d miss out, and he very likely appeased her as not wanting to upset her. Look, I like my stepmom. But every now and again she puts a weird foot down with my dad and I end up paying the price. I have absolutely no idea why.

Anyways. Now I play the game of whether I want to screenshot the times for Friday at said multiplex (after which point they will have already seen it) and send them to him as a “told you so” or just leave it be.

I want to be calmer about this, but my dad is 76 and the amount of father son things we can still do that mean something to each of us, thins every year. I dunno, I’m just grumbly.

This also means the chances of me inviting him to a movie in future is probably reduced to nil. INDY really was the only thing other than Bond that we ever really shared movie-wise.

Wife said she'll go see INDY with me, so that works. Still, annoyed at my dad.

That’s bullshit. You deserve better family members QT.

Slow Ben, on 17 July 2023 - 05:25 PM, said:

I find it hard to fault my dad as he's really just trying to navigate my stepmom's depression issues and not end up with her trying to unalive herself again...but yeah it's hard. My wife is damned solid support though, so at least I have that.

QuickTidal, on 17 July 2023 - 12:59 PM, said:

As virtual reality and movies designed for VR become more popular and affordable---and avatars more accurately represent users' faces and facial expressions (when desired)---it will become easier to watch movies 'with' people far away (minus touching, smelling, etc.---though they're also doable); it could especially be a boon for elderly people with limited mobility, if they're willing to adapt to the new technology (tough sell for many unless their mobility issues become so extreme that they're desperate enough to try something new...).

QuickTidal, on 17 July 2023 - 05:47 PM, said:

He's hurting you to help her. That's his decision and he's backed it up a few times.

It's a cruddy choice that apparently he feels like he has to make.

Big fan of your wife going with you and maybe you'll establish a tradition with your kids someday.

QT: sorry to hear that and I appreciate it sucks. But clearly your dad loves your stepmom a lot and is concerned about her wellbeing. You are doing well and have your own support network. So perhaps instead of trying to recreate historical bonds that you cherish but may not necessarily be as emotive to your dad, maybe try and find things that you both like that also include your stepmom? Making new connections instead of trying to revive old ones can be a wonderful and often surprising adventure, even later in life.

(For reference, I am 46 and my dad is in another country and wheelchair bound, so I am haply for any sort of relationship I can maintain, even if it isn't the woodland walks or bicycle trips that we used to make anymore).

amphibian, on 18 July 2023 - 03:08 AM, said:

Gorefest, on 18 July 2023 - 07:14 AM, said:

Yeah, thanks guys. That makes sense. I know at heart he's doing what he feels he needs to do...


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New messing with groove.....yesterday on the subway on the way home I was non-verbally threatened. So that was fun. The TTC these days is always a craps shoot for what crazy person (be they just homeless, or crazy and homeless, or drugged out and insane, or tweaking and yelling....the list goes on) is going to do what on what car. Line 2 is still in cars (Line 1 is one long connected car, but that didn't stop this from happening on that line the other day

*trigger warning for violence*


so Line 1 is not safer by being one car with many people....

Anyways, I'm sitting the whole ride, and nothing is going on. Listening to an audiobook and in my own world, I always get up one before my stop as to let anyone who is getting on at that stop have a shot at my seat. So I'm standing back from the doors as they open and admit a scattering of people...I THINK this guy got on there as I had not seen him during the rest of my ride prior to that...this guy sits (I'm not noticing him at this point)...as the doors close and we move o ff to my station, I move towards the doors and stand next to another individual at those doors, and there's a guy in front of me waiting to get off too. There's a gap beside him in front of the right side of the doors. The guy sitting (right next to the doors) gets up, faces me (I'm staring forwards, and he's standing aside me glaring) he's all of 5 inches from me and he's glaring hard (he had a dirty beard, and dark sunglasses....but didn't exactly look homeless or super crazy....more street-level sketchpad; probably addict?)...so I feel like he wants to get somewhere and won't say that to me....so I back up a bit....he steps in between me and the other guy getting off...and then with his filthy backpack on, he begins to kind of back up...I'm not stupid. I've lived downtown for 20 years, I know when someone is trying to start shit....he's backing up as he wants to push into me and either start shit or cause me discomfort. So I move all the way back with two other people at the other set of doors. He steps into the gap on the right in front of the doors....and then he TURNS around and GLARES at me again....I ignore him entirely and stare elsewhere (it is never a good idea to engage with these people EVER, even eye contact)...eventually he turns back around to stand directly in front of the right side of the doors. My stop arrives (bear in mind this happens in the 1 minute it takes to go from one station to the next in the city) and the person on the left gets off, but Glare-man does EXACTLY what I expect him to do and stands in the way on the right not moving, not getting off...after the guy on the left gets off I just say fuck it and follow him off ignoring the standing asshole on the right. He does not follow me (I admit I expected a follow, a nasty comment, or even a shove). I did nothing to this individual. Nothing. I did what I do every day, got up to let someone have my seat a stop early and waited to get off the subway....for whatever reason, this guy was trying to either pick a fight with me, or show me his power moves of getting in my way. At any rate. I'm super sick of the TTC being this much of a shitshow every day. No one is doing anything to help the homeless, addicts, mental health issue people who use the subway as a home....which is the root of the problem, and no one is policing the lines so this stuff doesn't happen.

Now I'm lucky. I'm a decently sized male so the odds someone is going to really pop off against me if I don't engage are low, but if I were someone of a more petite stature I bet this guy would have felt emboldened...

I stil ride the TTC, but my head is on a swivel constantly and when I see anyone who looks even remotely off...I willl get off and get on the next one. The only reason I didn't notice this guy and avoid him when he got on was I was into my audio book and wasn't paying attention. That's it for my AirPods in the immediate future...I'm not going to be distracted again.

This post has been edited by QuickTidal: 18 July 2023 - 12:24 PM

Passing a kidney stone.

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Even worse:

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Yeah right. It's another Mormon plot! (Kidding. Though I didn't see any actual studies cited. Some doctors really are like 'caffeine is addictive, therefore we're going to err on the side of always assuming it might make any medical condition worse, because addiction is bad, so it's bad, and bad + bad = worse!'.) Rejoice, a knife to the bladder! (Actually most of the worst pain is generally before it reaches the bladder. Stages of the uretral cross, not the urethral cross. But it does hurt also when you pee it out.) Looking forward to giving birth to knives through my urethra every couple of minutes....

Apparently walking helps it pass faster, and I don't want the kidney stone(s) to hover like the sword(s) of Damocles over the next few weeks, so I'm pacing back and forth and drinking as much water as I can comfortably tolerate (nausea from the kidney stone(s) hasn't gotten so bad yet that I can't keep water down---of course I don't want to try to chug as much water as I can, that can be fatal)....

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This post has been edited by Azath Vitr (D'ivers: 18 July 2023 - 03:26 PM

You should drink (watered down) apple cider vinegar.

worry, on 18 July 2023 - 03:36 PM, said:

fixed