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I'm pretty much now assuming that this how their brainstroming sessions go:
SE: Ian! I have this amazing idea!
ICE: Oh, boy, here we go...
SE: Just listen to this, listen here. Are you ready? Ok, here it comes: What if instead of the standard two races of elves, we have three?! And they're not elves, but kinda like elves, but only ten thousand times cooler, ok? And what if-
SE: - Ian, are you listening?
ICE: Yes, three types of elves-
SE: Not elves, but like really tall people, who live superlong, and are badass at fighting and can do magic and stuff! And some of them can turn into dragons, but not regular firebreathing dragons, but dragons who vomit magic, and maybe they also have hair? And one of them has a totally badass sword that...that eats souls, or something, like that sword in World of Warcraft, only this one is like 3.5 times cooler and will give it a dragon-y name like Draconis or something!
ICE: ok...
SE: Anyway, we have three types of elv-, no, lets call them something cool like Overlordic Beings of Eternal Night or whatever...and what if, are you listening, what if, what if, the white elves are the bad guys and the dark elves are the good guys?! Eh?
SE: And then the grey ones are pretty much all dicks, except for a few that I will make everyone love and then they'll feel bad for all the grey ones even though they're total dicks pretty much the entire time!! Are you writing this down, Ian?
ICE: Sure, Steven.
SE: Oh, and I also kinda want orcs, but not orcs, if you know what I mean? Like big, and strong and green, with big teeth and yellow eyes, but they're not orcs. This is very important, Ian. THEY'RE NOT ORCS!!
ICE: Godfuckingdammit, Steve...
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SE: I just watched that movie Twister, with WhatshisFace and that actress that looks a lot like Jodie Foster, but isn't. Have you seen it?
ICE: Yes...
SE: And it gave me this idea-
ICE: No.
SE: But you haven't even heard it yet! It's really good, Ian, I swear. I pinky-swear!
ICE: Fine. Go ahead.
SE: What if we put a twister like the one in Twister in the book, only a hundred times bigger? In Twister the worst one is only like a Category 5, but I say we crank it all the way up to 11! And, and, and we put it in the desert so it's made of sand and stuff, and if someone, or something, is caught in it, which is going to happen ALL the time, they get their faces sanded off?
ICE: Ok, that does sound kinda cool. I'm surpr-
SE: But it's actually a magical twister conjured up by an old god, and then a bunch of crazy religious zealots uses it as a symbol for their rebellion, and their leader has Conan the Barbarian as a bodyguard, but we'll definitely call him something else as I'm pretty sure Conan is copyrighted, oh and he has a belt full of ears, which he has taken from the enemies he's killed, and then there's a giant horse, maybe some big-ass dogs, and I'm gonna go and put some really cool ghosts in there too. And I'm gonna write it from both sides so you can't really tell who the good guys and who the bad guys are, because really everyone is a bit of both and...are you writing this down? This stuff is golden! Eh?
ICE: ... Ste-
SE: Where was I? Oh yes, and then the rebellion sends its army through the twister, which is actually a magical portal, that can kill and maim people in horrible ways, and then they fight with some other guys! What if the leaders of both armies have some sort of duel? And what if they're women? AND WHAT IF THEY'RE RELATED?!?! It's going to be so tragic, Ian, you're defintely going to cry. You always cry.
ICE: One time, Steven!! It happened once!
SE: And the twister needs a cool name because we're writing fantasy after all. It is fantasy, right? Yeah, so, we call it the Twister of Doom, or The Tornado of a Thousand Deaths, or WAh WAh WAH Ian has Sand in his Mangina!
ICE: I'm going to bed now, Steven.
This post has been edited by Grimjust Bearegular: 07 July 2015 - 09:02 AM
